This is a brilliant, violent medieval film by Verhoeven. It's not as classy as John Boorman's Excalibur (1981) but I consider it a keeper that I will add to my DVD collection. It's also one of Rutger Hauer's best, before he sunk into mediocrity. The new widescreen, anamorphic MGM DVD released in 2004 is a stunner!! It's so much better than that washed-out, old Orion VHS tape that was on the shelves of your typical rental store back in the 90s. The Spanish countryside looks awesome, the colors are vivid and there's no print damage that I can see, anywhere in the film. The surround sound is also pretty good for a movie of it's time, and there's no stupid CGI anywhere in the film. Great story. I highly recommend FLESH + BLOOD! 8 out of 10
Reviews
137 Reviews
Seven Blood-Stained Orchids
(1972)
Good Lenzi does Argento gialli
12 June 2005
(aka: SEVEN BLOOD STAINED ORCHIDS)
The half-moon killer is on a mission to kill the seven women who attended a seaside resort the night his brother was killed in an automobile accident with one of the women. He doesn't know which one (and doesn't really care) so all seven have to be murdered in serial killer-like fashion, including Gulia (Uschi Glas) who owned the hotel at the time.
She and her husband Mario (Antonio Sabato) then spend the next 90 minutes sleuthing the killer out after he attempts to kill Gulia on a train. The gore is restrained except for one murder where the killer uses an electric drill to dispatch his victim.
Lenzi did a pretty good job with this Edgar Wallace murder mystery and you never know what's going to happen next or what Mario and Gulia turn up as the clues mount. And the killer's identity is a surprise which makes it effective without giving away any clues before hand until it needs to be given away.
The Shreik/Media Blasters anamorphic DVD is excellent with nice widescreen colors and no damage to the film elements they used. Sound is dubbed in English although the original Italian with English subtitles would've be nice.
Extras include a brief poster gallery and interviews with Lenzi and Gabriella Giorgelli, who played the first victim, a hooker who is slashed to death at the beginning of the film. Giorgelli has aged quite a bit since the film's release in 1971. I didn't even recognize her.
If you're into giallo like I am, then this is a welcome addition to your collection. Fully recommended.
7 out of 10
The half-moon killer is on a mission to kill the seven women who attended a seaside resort the night his brother was killed in an automobile accident with one of the women. He doesn't know which one (and doesn't really care) so all seven have to be murdered in serial killer-like fashion, including Gulia (Uschi Glas) who owned the hotel at the time.
She and her husband Mario (Antonio Sabato) then spend the next 90 minutes sleuthing the killer out after he attempts to kill Gulia on a train. The gore is restrained except for one murder where the killer uses an electric drill to dispatch his victim.
Lenzi did a pretty good job with this Edgar Wallace murder mystery and you never know what's going to happen next or what Mario and Gulia turn up as the clues mount. And the killer's identity is a surprise which makes it effective without giving away any clues before hand until it needs to be given away.
The Shreik/Media Blasters anamorphic DVD is excellent with nice widescreen colors and no damage to the film elements they used. Sound is dubbed in English although the original Italian with English subtitles would've be nice.
Extras include a brief poster gallery and interviews with Lenzi and Gabriella Giorgelli, who played the first victim, a hooker who is slashed to death at the beginning of the film. Giorgelli has aged quite a bit since the film's release in 1971. I didn't even recognize her.
If you're into giallo like I am, then this is a welcome addition to your collection. Fully recommended.
7 out of 10
The Crimes of the Black Cat
(1972)
OK "Blood And Black Lace" clone
11 June 2005
(aka: THE CRIMES OF THE BLACK CAT)
Filmed in Denmark with a largely Italian cast in a setting away from the usual Italian locations for this genre. So forget that these people are Danes speaking Italian. You can't be too specific with a film like this.
OK so you've seen this before and if you've seen BLOOD AND BLACK LACE, then you'll know how it turns out. Even so, this really isn't bad watching and the story is constructed well despite a couple of suspense contrivances for the audience like footsteps approaching a door, expecting the viewer to believe it's the killer when it turns out to be the hotel bellboy delivering breakfast.
Blind composer Peter Oliver (spaghetti western star, Anthony Steffen) helps sleuth the murders of fashion models in swanky Copenhagen after his close friend Paola is murdered. He suspects something is wrong when he overhears a conversation about a crime in a restaurant while waiting for Paola to show up. She never does. It turns out Paola is blackmailing Victor (Giacomo Rossi-Stuart), threatening to expose some incriminating photographs to his wife (Sylvia Koscina).
Of course when it comes to this genre, the murders can't always be done in a straightforward way and one particular device is using a black cat who's hands are dipped in curare, scratching the victims and causing them to have heart attacks. Strange, yes, but that's typical of the genre so one has to suspend disbelief if you want to watch films like this.
I won't reveal who the name of the killer is. You'll have to see that for yourself, but I will say that it ends in one of those typical freeze-frame endings that were popular in the 1970s.
The DVD by Degored is of poor quality, taken from videotape source with dropouts appearing occasionally and muffled sound, although the subtitles in English look pretty accurate.
There are worse out there.
5 out of 10
Filmed in Denmark with a largely Italian cast in a setting away from the usual Italian locations for this genre. So forget that these people are Danes speaking Italian. You can't be too specific with a film like this.
OK so you've seen this before and if you've seen BLOOD AND BLACK LACE, then you'll know how it turns out. Even so, this really isn't bad watching and the story is constructed well despite a couple of suspense contrivances for the audience like footsteps approaching a door, expecting the viewer to believe it's the killer when it turns out to be the hotel bellboy delivering breakfast.
Blind composer Peter Oliver (spaghetti western star, Anthony Steffen) helps sleuth the murders of fashion models in swanky Copenhagen after his close friend Paola is murdered. He suspects something is wrong when he overhears a conversation about a crime in a restaurant while waiting for Paola to show up. She never does. It turns out Paola is blackmailing Victor (Giacomo Rossi-Stuart), threatening to expose some incriminating photographs to his wife (Sylvia Koscina).
Of course when it comes to this genre, the murders can't always be done in a straightforward way and one particular device is using a black cat who's hands are dipped in curare, scratching the victims and causing them to have heart attacks. Strange, yes, but that's typical of the genre so one has to suspend disbelief if you want to watch films like this.
I won't reveal who the name of the killer is. You'll have to see that for yourself, but I will say that it ends in one of those typical freeze-frame endings that were popular in the 1970s.
The DVD by Degored is of poor quality, taken from videotape source with dropouts appearing occasionally and muffled sound, although the subtitles in English look pretty accurate.
There are worse out there.
5 out of 10
The Crazies
(1973)
Better than a lot of other low budget horror for it's time, but NO zombies
25 February 2005
A plane crashes near Pittsburgh carrying a bacteriological weapon called "Trixie". It gets into a nearby town's water supply causing it's citizen to go crazy, some of them homicidal maniacs. Some of the town's residents try to escape through a cordon around the town set up by the Army and shooting between the residents and soldiers (who go around wearing white contamination suits) and blood spurts ensue. That pretty much sums up the plot.
There's really no gore in this Romero film, but we do see plenty of gun battles that look cheap and amateurish. The only memorable character is Dr. Watts, played by Richard France, who's overacting is so bad that I actually liked his time on the screen. You can see he's trying real hard.
The Blue Underground anamorphic DVD looks nice and it contains a short interview with co-star Lynn Lowry who explains some of her experiences on the film as well as her failed film career. Also a decent commentary track by George Romero who wishes he could have done more with it if he had a bigger budget.
As long as one doesn't compare it to Romero's other films like the DEAD trilogy or MARTIN (1977), then it's better than most 70s low budget efforts in that cheap, charming way. I think it's worth a look.
6 out of 10
-
There's really no gore in this Romero film, but we do see plenty of gun battles that look cheap and amateurish. The only memorable character is Dr. Watts, played by Richard France, who's overacting is so bad that I actually liked his time on the screen. You can see he's trying real hard.
The Blue Underground anamorphic DVD looks nice and it contains a short interview with co-star Lynn Lowry who explains some of her experiences on the film as well as her failed film career. Also a decent commentary track by George Romero who wishes he could have done more with it if he had a bigger budget.
As long as one doesn't compare it to Romero's other films like the DEAD trilogy or MARTIN (1977), then it's better than most 70s low budget efforts in that cheap, charming way. I think it's worth a look.
6 out of 10
-
Resident Evil: Apocalypse
(2004)
Will appeal to teenage dumb asses
15 January 2005
This is the kind of movie that will appeal to 15 year olds addicted to video games and suffering from Attention Deficit Disorder. Any extended dialog beyond 30 seconds would lose them in confusion and slow the pace of the film down. Doh...
Jeez, this is even worse than the first one (which I thought had some potential had they not held back on the gore) with lousy CGI, bad dialog and hokey action sequences. In fact, what little dialog there is, is held to tired, smart-alecky remarks and the standard clichés that we've heard ka-zillion times before. Same old, same old.... (yawn....)
All the characters in the film are clichés themselves with the men acting either evil or irrelevant (and not terribly smart) while the action babes hold the show in an effort to get the horny teenage males juices going.
It's all part of that bogus "let's empower women" act that Hollywood's been hooked on the last few years, only they don't have Michelle Rodriguez in there to make it look convincing. She's one of the few out there who can carry off that kind of thing and make the action babe look entertaining, as far as I'm concerned. Too bad she was killed off in the first film.
There's nothing new about this. It's not even a particularly interesting story this time around, but with today's wigger generation, is there anything out there that is?
Lowest rating. If I could give it a zero, I would.
1 out of 10
Jeez, this is even worse than the first one (which I thought had some potential had they not held back on the gore) with lousy CGI, bad dialog and hokey action sequences. In fact, what little dialog there is, is held to tired, smart-alecky remarks and the standard clichés that we've heard ka-zillion times before. Same old, same old.... (yawn....)
All the characters in the film are clichés themselves with the men acting either evil or irrelevant (and not terribly smart) while the action babes hold the show in an effort to get the horny teenage males juices going.
It's all part of that bogus "let's empower women" act that Hollywood's been hooked on the last few years, only they don't have Michelle Rodriguez in there to make it look convincing. She's one of the few out there who can carry off that kind of thing and make the action babe look entertaining, as far as I'm concerned. Too bad she was killed off in the first film.
There's nothing new about this. It's not even a particularly interesting story this time around, but with today's wigger generation, is there anything out there that is?
Lowest rating. If I could give it a zero, I would.
1 out of 10
The Legacy
(1978)
Katherine & Sam go to the devil
27 September 2004
Warning: Spoilers
Another of Universal's recent 70s DVD horror releases, this one's about a woman (Katherine Ross) who goes to England with her cynical boyfriend (Sam Elliott) to take on an interior decorating assignment. On a motorcycle ride out in the countryside, they're 'accidentally' run off the road by Jason Mountolive and are invited to stay at his castle while repairs are done to their motorbike.
Once they get there, they encounter other strange guests including Roger Daltrey as a rock star and a creepy German industrialist (played by Charles Gray). Daltrey later dies from choking on a chicken bone while Gray dies after being burned by a fire. His pile of burnt remains are then scooped up by one of the house staff and fed to the dogs. Cool.
As the rest of the other guest die off through horrible ends designed to look like accidents, it slowly dawns on Ross that she is the chosen one to inherit the not-so-normal Mountolive's legacy.
I thought this one was entertaining with an intriguing plot that had me wondering what was going to happen next. Lots of excellent overhead shots and crane work add to the beautiful view of the castle where they filmed it.
More good English locations also add to the atmosphere.
If your not too demanding about horror films from the 70s, then you might like this one. I thought it was entertaining enough.
7 out of 10
Once they get there, they encounter other strange guests including Roger Daltrey as a rock star and a creepy German industrialist (played by Charles Gray). Daltrey later dies from choking on a chicken bone while Gray dies after being burned by a fire. His pile of burnt remains are then scooped up by one of the house staff and fed to the dogs. Cool.
As the rest of the other guest die off through horrible ends designed to look like accidents, it slowly dawns on Ross that she is the chosen one to inherit the not-so-normal Mountolive's legacy.
I thought this one was entertaining with an intriguing plot that had me wondering what was going to happen next. Lots of excellent overhead shots and crane work add to the beautiful view of the castle where they filmed it.
More good English locations also add to the atmosphere.
If your not too demanding about horror films from the 70s, then you might like this one. I thought it was entertaining enough.
7 out of 10
The Sentinel
(1977)
One of the best portals into hell
27 September 2004
Warning: Spoilers
Man, I really love the new DVD that Universal put out. I've never seen THE SENTINEL look this good since I had to put up with crappy, grainy VHS tapes for years. Unfortunately there are no extras beyond a trailer that looks pretty worse for wear. And AVOID the Goodtimes DVD at all costs. It sucks.
Anyway, troubled fashion model Alison Parker (Cristina Raines) moves into haunted NYC brownstone, only it's more than just haunted. It's also a portal to hell and the Vatican keeps an old blind priest (John Carradine) to keep watch over it and make sure the devils and arch-angels don't escape.
This has an all star cast full of old-timey actors like Ava Gardner, Arthur Kennedy, Jose Ferrer etc... as well as cameos of upcoming 80s stars including Christopher Walken, Jeff Goldblum (who's voice was mysteriously overdubbed) and Tom Berenger. And you won't even recognize Jerry Orbach from LAW & ORDER. I had to do a double-take when I didn't quite place where I'd seen him before.
Nice gore scenes of Alison slicing the eye and nose off her dead father's rotting corpse that's been possessed by the devil. And there's a neat ending where disfigured, deformed people try to haunt Alison into committing suicide so she won't be the next one to guard the portal. It seems Alison's troubled past makes her a prime candidate by the Vatican to become the next sentinel.
An excellent, creepy 70s classic from director Michael Winner that shouldn't be missed. I also recommended it for those who want something a little more imaginative beyond the usual stupid teenager slashers and horror comedy.
7 out of 10
-
Anyway, troubled fashion model Alison Parker (Cristina Raines) moves into haunted NYC brownstone, only it's more than just haunted. It's also a portal to hell and the Vatican keeps an old blind priest (John Carradine) to keep watch over it and make sure the devils and arch-angels don't escape.
This has an all star cast full of old-timey actors like Ava Gardner, Arthur Kennedy, Jose Ferrer etc... as well as cameos of upcoming 80s stars including Christopher Walken, Jeff Goldblum (who's voice was mysteriously overdubbed) and Tom Berenger. And you won't even recognize Jerry Orbach from LAW & ORDER. I had to do a double-take when I didn't quite place where I'd seen him before.
Nice gore scenes of Alison slicing the eye and nose off her dead father's rotting corpse that's been possessed by the devil. And there's a neat ending where disfigured, deformed people try to haunt Alison into committing suicide so she won't be the next one to guard the portal. It seems Alison's troubled past makes her a prime candidate by the Vatican to become the next sentinel.
An excellent, creepy 70s classic from director Michael Winner that shouldn't be missed. I also recommended it for those who want something a little more imaginative beyond the usual stupid teenager slashers and horror comedy.
7 out of 10
-
The Legend of Hell House
(1973)
Before POLTERGEIST, there was...
27 September 2004
This film did pretty good box office back in '73, but it might be a little too slow for today's ADD crowd that can't sit still beyond five minutes unless bodies are spurting blood and MTV-like camera-work is dancing all over the place. Everything nowadays has to be instantaneous so 'we' throw out things little things like plot & character development and a gradual suspense buildup. This movie is full of things like that which makes it a classic in my book.
Rich multi-millionaire Rudolph Deutsch (Roland Culver) hires Lionel Barrett and his wife (Clive Revill & Gayle Hunnicutt) to investigate the hauntings that are taking place at the notorious Belasco manor. It seems plenty of atrocities took place in the mansion some 50 years previously by Emeric Belasco and their spirits are not at peace. Barrett takes along Benjamin Fisher (Roddy McDowell) and Florence Tanner (Pamela Franklin) as mediums to flesh out the spirits and find out how to dispel them from the property.
What THE HAUNTING was for the 60s, and POLTERGEIST was for the 80s, THE LEGEND OF HELL HOUSE is what I consider one of the definitive ghost stories (it ties with THE CHANGELING) of the 1970s. If you like a good story on top of some shocks that come from out of nowhere, then I would suggest you check this one out.
The Fox DVD looks good for a film of this age in widescreen anamorphic vivid color. The black levels look clean and there's no digital artifacts to be found. The DVD has no extras beyond a scratchy looking trailer and some previews for other Fox DVD releases.
Even so, it sends chills up my spine and the ending is a kicker. Recommended!
8 out of 10
-
Rich multi-millionaire Rudolph Deutsch (Roland Culver) hires Lionel Barrett and his wife (Clive Revill & Gayle Hunnicutt) to investigate the hauntings that are taking place at the notorious Belasco manor. It seems plenty of atrocities took place in the mansion some 50 years previously by Emeric Belasco and their spirits are not at peace. Barrett takes along Benjamin Fisher (Roddy McDowell) and Florence Tanner (Pamela Franklin) as mediums to flesh out the spirits and find out how to dispel them from the property.
What THE HAUNTING was for the 60s, and POLTERGEIST was for the 80s, THE LEGEND OF HELL HOUSE is what I consider one of the definitive ghost stories (it ties with THE CHANGELING) of the 1970s. If you like a good story on top of some shocks that come from out of nowhere, then I would suggest you check this one out.
The Fox DVD looks good for a film of this age in widescreen anamorphic vivid color. The black levels look clean and there's no digital artifacts to be found. The DVD has no extras beyond a scratchy looking trailer and some previews for other Fox DVD releases.
Even so, it sends chills up my spine and the ending is a kicker. Recommended!
8 out of 10
-
Devil Doll
(1964)
Possessed devil doll makes a nice little drive-in feature
27 September 2004
I actually liked this b/w low budgeter that made the rounds at the drive-ins back in the early-60s. It deserves better than the MST3K treatment since the acting isn't bad at all.
The Great Vorelli (Bryant Haliday) knows the art of transferring souls into inanimate objects, in the case a ventriloquist's dummy Vorelli uses in his stage act. He runs into rich, beautiful Marianne Horn (Yvonne Romain) and seeks to hypnotize her into marrying her and gain her inheritance. William Sylvester plays the reporter (and boyfriend) of Romain who's investigating Vorelli.
The ending fight scene between the dummy and Vorelli is unintentionally hilarious so I can see why MST3K picked it for an episode, but the rest of the film isn't played for laughs. Nice little twist when Sylvester walks in at the end of the fight.
The widescreen anamorphic Image DVD has both the Euro print with topless scenes, as well as the censored U.S. version. The poster named "35541m" has a pretty good rundown over the differences between the two written below. However, I should add that the Euro print is sharper and in slightly better shape than the U.S. print.
6 out of 10
The Great Vorelli (Bryant Haliday) knows the art of transferring souls into inanimate objects, in the case a ventriloquist's dummy Vorelli uses in his stage act. He runs into rich, beautiful Marianne Horn (Yvonne Romain) and seeks to hypnotize her into marrying her and gain her inheritance. William Sylvester plays the reporter (and boyfriend) of Romain who's investigating Vorelli.
The ending fight scene between the dummy and Vorelli is unintentionally hilarious so I can see why MST3K picked it for an episode, but the rest of the film isn't played for laughs. Nice little twist when Sylvester walks in at the end of the fight.
The widescreen anamorphic Image DVD has both the Euro print with topless scenes, as well as the censored U.S. version. The poster named "35541m" has a pretty good rundown over the differences between the two written below. However, I should add that the Euro print is sharper and in slightly better shape than the U.S. print.
6 out of 10
XXX sex + zombies = boring flop
27 August 2004
(aka: EROTIC NIGHTS OF THE LIVING DEAD)
Just saw the un-cut, newly-remastered Shriek/Media Blasters DVD of this and I must say, I was bored by the whole thing. However, 'everybody else' must have liked it because the cast stuck around for D'Amato's next Caribbean offering, PORNO HOLOCAUST (1981)
OK, I admit I was turned on by the hardcore threesome between Manlio Cersosimo and the two Dominican whores he had up in his room, but the rest of the film was totally un-interesting, horror-wise or sex-wise. Gemser should have continued played Emmanuelle and I'm surprised she didn't here. Especially for a Joe D'Amato movie.
There's surprisingly little gore for a film of this scope, and the zombie plot looks like it was thrown in there as a pretext for the soft-core lesbian scenes between Gemser and Funari. There's also soft core sex scenes between Eastman and Gemser and between Cersosimo and Funari as well as the previously mentioned hard-core sex scene.
Plot concerns George Eastman taking Manlio Cersosimo and his girlfriend (Dirce Funari) to an island so he can scout locations for a new hotel resort. A female spirit (Laura Gemser) and an old man conjure up the dead buried on the island to go after these three and stop any development from taking place.
Some of the zombies get impaled on sticks by Eastman and some brown & green stuff (blood?) comes flowing out, and there's a couple of zombies who get torched, but that's pretty much all the action. Eastman and Funari wind up in a 'mental institution' after all this.
Shriek/Media Blasters did their usual, impeccable wide-screen treatment of this DVD, far more than the actual film deserves. Not much in the line of extras, though. There's also a half-way decent electronic score by Marcello Giombini.
Mostly deserves a yawn...
3 out of 10
Just saw the un-cut, newly-remastered Shriek/Media Blasters DVD of this and I must say, I was bored by the whole thing. However, 'everybody else' must have liked it because the cast stuck around for D'Amato's next Caribbean offering, PORNO HOLOCAUST (1981)
OK, I admit I was turned on by the hardcore threesome between Manlio Cersosimo and the two Dominican whores he had up in his room, but the rest of the film was totally un-interesting, horror-wise or sex-wise. Gemser should have continued played Emmanuelle and I'm surprised she didn't here. Especially for a Joe D'Amato movie.
There's surprisingly little gore for a film of this scope, and the zombie plot looks like it was thrown in there as a pretext for the soft-core lesbian scenes between Gemser and Funari. There's also soft core sex scenes between Eastman and Gemser and between Cersosimo and Funari as well as the previously mentioned hard-core sex scene.
Plot concerns George Eastman taking Manlio Cersosimo and his girlfriend (Dirce Funari) to an island so he can scout locations for a new hotel resort. A female spirit (Laura Gemser) and an old man conjure up the dead buried on the island to go after these three and stop any development from taking place.
Some of the zombies get impaled on sticks by Eastman and some brown & green stuff (blood?) comes flowing out, and there's a couple of zombies who get torched, but that's pretty much all the action. Eastman and Funari wind up in a 'mental institution' after all this.
Shriek/Media Blasters did their usual, impeccable wide-screen treatment of this DVD, far more than the actual film deserves. Not much in the line of extras, though. There's also a half-way decent electronic score by Marcello Giombini.
Mostly deserves a yawn...
3 out of 10
The Prowler
(1981)
Lame plot that wastes good Tom Savini special effects
26 August 2004
During a college graduation dance, a WWII veteran comes home and finds his ex-girlfriend kissing her boyfriend in a pagoda and kills them using a pitchfork and a bayonet. He goes around in full WWII combat gear with a mask over his face.
Jump 35 years later and at the new graduation dance (the 1st one since 1945), the killing begins again with various college students having their throats slit, pitchforks in their bellies and being chased all around Cape May, New Jersey. And that's pretty much the plot.
Except for Farley Granger (who must've sunk pretty far career-wise in order to do this) and an unspeaking cameo by Lawrence Tierney sitting in a wheelchair, I've never heard of the rest of the cast. They're all unknowns to me.
The only thing saving this otherwise mediocre HALLOWEEN clone is the great special effects by Tom Savini. The throat slittings and the pitchfork piercings look particularly realistic and gruesome, some of the best I've ever seen. And with no lame CGI anywhere in sight. It's all done the good old-fashioned way. With latex and blood bags.
Blue Underground gives this one the class treatment with a nice wide-screen print that looks about as well as can be expected for a medium grade 80s horror film. However the real jewel of this DVD is Savini's 12 minute videotape from late 1980 showing the behind the scenes special effects set-up, including the leading antagonist's head being blown off by a shotgun. That in and of itself is worth more than the whole movie put together.
Without the special effects, I'd give it a much lower rating.
5 out of 10
Jump 35 years later and at the new graduation dance (the 1st one since 1945), the killing begins again with various college students having their throats slit, pitchforks in their bellies and being chased all around Cape May, New Jersey. And that's pretty much the plot.
Except for Farley Granger (who must've sunk pretty far career-wise in order to do this) and an unspeaking cameo by Lawrence Tierney sitting in a wheelchair, I've never heard of the rest of the cast. They're all unknowns to me.
The only thing saving this otherwise mediocre HALLOWEEN clone is the great special effects by Tom Savini. The throat slittings and the pitchfork piercings look particularly realistic and gruesome, some of the best I've ever seen. And with no lame CGI anywhere in sight. It's all done the good old-fashioned way. With latex and blood bags.
Blue Underground gives this one the class treatment with a nice wide-screen print that looks about as well as can be expected for a medium grade 80s horror film. However the real jewel of this DVD is Savini's 12 minute videotape from late 1980 showing the behind the scenes special effects set-up, including the leading antagonist's head being blown off by a shotgun. That in and of itself is worth more than the whole movie put together.
Without the special effects, I'd give it a much lower rating.
5 out of 10
Ladyhawke
(1985)
Medieval crud gone wrong
9 August 2004
The good:
This has a great premise of two lovers (Hauer & Pfeiffer) doomed to never meet each other, placed upon the both of them by the Bishop of Aquila's curse. He turns into a wolf by night, she turns into a hawk by day. It also has great Italian scenery with beautiful castles and good cinematography. Donner did an excellent job as far as the location work goes.
The bad:
Matthew Broderick. Blah, what an idiotic character. His smirky comments were annoying and un-funny to say the least. I guess he was put in there to appeal to the then 1985 PG-13 teen crowd, but all it does is help ruin the film just to put in some corny laughs. If he kept his mouth shut more often, it might have worked.
The music by Alan Parsons, sucks.
An early-80s disco synth beat that's totally out of place for a film of this period. Once again, I guess it was to modernize the story for the teen-beat crowd. I certainly wouldn't go out of my way to buy the soundtrack. Terrible.
If you want to hear how music should sound in a medieval film, then check out Paul Verhoven's FLESH + BLOOD (1985), the film Rutger Hauer did right after this one. It has an excellent Basil Poledouris score.
The ending fight scene.
This has to be one of the worst sword fights I've ever scene in a medieval period piece. They look like they could barely hold their swords up in the air. Lame.
I did like the horses charging one another in the church, but the rest of the bad guys just stand there looking dumbfounded and clueless. Why didn't they fight? Why didn't the flee?
It's sad that a film with a great premise like this would be so poorly executed.
Below average.
4 out of 10
This has a great premise of two lovers (Hauer & Pfeiffer) doomed to never meet each other, placed upon the both of them by the Bishop of Aquila's curse. He turns into a wolf by night, she turns into a hawk by day. It also has great Italian scenery with beautiful castles and good cinematography. Donner did an excellent job as far as the location work goes.
The bad:
Matthew Broderick. Blah, what an idiotic character. His smirky comments were annoying and un-funny to say the least. I guess he was put in there to appeal to the then 1985 PG-13 teen crowd, but all it does is help ruin the film just to put in some corny laughs. If he kept his mouth shut more often, it might have worked.
The music by Alan Parsons, sucks.
An early-80s disco synth beat that's totally out of place for a film of this period. Once again, I guess it was to modernize the story for the teen-beat crowd. I certainly wouldn't go out of my way to buy the soundtrack. Terrible.
If you want to hear how music should sound in a medieval film, then check out Paul Verhoven's FLESH + BLOOD (1985), the film Rutger Hauer did right after this one. It has an excellent Basil Poledouris score.
The ending fight scene.
This has to be one of the worst sword fights I've ever scene in a medieval period piece. They look like they could barely hold their swords up in the air. Lame.
I did like the horses charging one another in the church, but the rest of the bad guys just stand there looking dumbfounded and clueless. Why didn't they fight? Why didn't the flee?
It's sad that a film with a great premise like this would be so poorly executed.
Below average.
4 out of 10
Moon Zero Two
(1969)
No DVD release??
9 August 2004
This is one of the few Hammer films that (to my knowledge) never made it on to VHS. Now with Anchor Bay releasing most of the Hammer Collection on to DVD, I'd like to see them release this one as well.
I saw this in 1970 when I was a little kid, and one of the most hilarious things I remember about it was seeing the rock band from the time period when the movie was in production, playing as aged old men rock stars in the future. It kinda reminds me of the old rock stars from the 60s and 70s playing the same thing today, who haven't changed at all except their age.
I'm not gonna rate it at this time because I haven't seen it in so long, but I'll be looking forward to it if and when it comes out. Just don't take it seriously like some of the other reviews below. It's only escapist fare.
And never mind the MST2K crap. The film isn't that bad to deserve that kind of treatment.
I saw this in 1970 when I was a little kid, and one of the most hilarious things I remember about it was seeing the rock band from the time period when the movie was in production, playing as aged old men rock stars in the future. It kinda reminds me of the old rock stars from the 60s and 70s playing the same thing today, who haven't changed at all except their age.
I'm not gonna rate it at this time because I haven't seen it in so long, but I'll be looking forward to it if and when it comes out. Just don't take it seriously like some of the other reviews below. It's only escapist fare.
And never mind the MST2K crap. The film isn't that bad to deserve that kind of treatment.
Dark Waters
(1993)
Excellent "nuns from hell" flick with superb atmospherics
14 July 2004
Warning: Spoilers
(aka: DEAD WATERS)
Elizabeth travels from London to the Crimea looking for a missing friend as well inquiring as to why her father still sends money to the convent that's located on an island in the Black Sea. There, she finds out that her friend was killed by the nuns for spying on a ceremony that takes place in an underground cavern. They then hold Elizabeth prisoner.
It also helps that most of the film takes place in these candle-lit caverns because it adds a lot to an otherwise spooky atmosphere.
There is also the blind grandmother of Elizabeth who gets burned to death in a particular grisly scene by the seashore, and a nun who gets her guts ripped out by the fantastic devil creature that inhabits one of the underground caverns. You don't get a full picture of the creature until the end, but let's just say it has multiple sagging tits, slimy skin and horns that come out the top of it's head. It's looks pretty cool. We also get to meet Elizabeth's sister Sarah who in more ways than one, shows off her severely scarred body to Elizabeth. Not a bad makeup job.
All in all, I *really* liked this one, but avoid the York DVD and watch the VHS instead because the picture is actually cropped off at the sides on the DVD. You only get to see the top of someone's head, or part of the front of someone's face for the close-in shots. This is due to the severe full screen matting the DVD uses. In fact, it's one of the worst DVD transfers I've ever seen, and the film is only about ten years old. There are no extras, not even a menu to start from.
This flick really deserves a better media presentation and I'm hoping Anchor Bay or Media Blasters will get a hold of the master print, someday. I'd be well worth the wait because if your a fan of atmospheric Italo horror, then I think you might like this one. In fact, I enjoyed this one a hell of a lot more than ALUCARDA.
An Italian/Russian/UK co-production
Recommended.
8 out of 10
Elizabeth travels from London to the Crimea looking for a missing friend as well inquiring as to why her father still sends money to the convent that's located on an island in the Black Sea. There, she finds out that her friend was killed by the nuns for spying on a ceremony that takes place in an underground cavern. They then hold Elizabeth prisoner.
It also helps that most of the film takes place in these candle-lit caverns because it adds a lot to an otherwise spooky atmosphere.
There is also the blind grandmother of Elizabeth who gets burned to death in a particular grisly scene by the seashore, and a nun who gets her guts ripped out by the fantastic devil creature that inhabits one of the underground caverns. You don't get a full picture of the creature until the end, but let's just say it has multiple sagging tits, slimy skin and horns that come out the top of it's head. It's looks pretty cool. We also get to meet Elizabeth's sister Sarah who in more ways than one, shows off her severely scarred body to Elizabeth. Not a bad makeup job.
All in all, I *really* liked this one, but avoid the York DVD and watch the VHS instead because the picture is actually cropped off at the sides on the DVD. You only get to see the top of someone's head, or part of the front of someone's face for the close-in shots. This is due to the severe full screen matting the DVD uses. In fact, it's one of the worst DVD transfers I've ever seen, and the film is only about ten years old. There are no extras, not even a menu to start from.
This flick really deserves a better media presentation and I'm hoping Anchor Bay or Media Blasters will get a hold of the master print, someday. I'd be well worth the wait because if your a fan of atmospheric Italo horror, then I think you might like this one. In fact, I enjoyed this one a hell of a lot more than ALUCARDA.
An Italian/Russian/UK co-production
Recommended.
8 out of 10
The War of the Planets
(1966)
Cheap sets, boring script
5 July 2004
(aka: WAR OF THE PLANETS)
Caught this one on TCM and it's typical for Italian space operas of the time, with the notable exception of Mario Bava's PLANET OF THE VAMPIRES (1966).
The main problems are that the script is so poorly thought out, that it was probably written as they filmed each scene on the spot. And the sets look so low budget that even Ed Wood did a more credible job with PLAN 9 FROM OUTER SPACE. At least Ed's film was 'entertaining', unlike this boredom.
Aliens in the form of green smoke and flashing lights take over orbiting space stations around the Earth. It brainwashes some people into committing acts of sabotage while others are just left immobile with a little green tinge to their skin. I guess they did this to keep the film budget down.
It's up to the Earth space forces led by Tony Russell to save the world from the aliens and with pretty Lisa Gastoni (as well as dumb #2, Franco Nero) by his side, we are treated to one of the cheapest looking space battles in cinema history.
I also notice that this film has the MGM logo at the beginning of it. They must have been so desperate for product in 1965 that they had to resort to importing Euro turkeys like this one. Besides which, Anthony Margheriti did much so much better in the horror genre that he should have stuck to it.
So if you're into MST3K-type effluent (which I'm not), then this is the film for you.
2 out of 10
Caught this one on TCM and it's typical for Italian space operas of the time, with the notable exception of Mario Bava's PLANET OF THE VAMPIRES (1966).
The main problems are that the script is so poorly thought out, that it was probably written as they filmed each scene on the spot. And the sets look so low budget that even Ed Wood did a more credible job with PLAN 9 FROM OUTER SPACE. At least Ed's film was 'entertaining', unlike this boredom.
Aliens in the form of green smoke and flashing lights take over orbiting space stations around the Earth. It brainwashes some people into committing acts of sabotage while others are just left immobile with a little green tinge to their skin. I guess they did this to keep the film budget down.
It's up to the Earth space forces led by Tony Russell to save the world from the aliens and with pretty Lisa Gastoni (as well as dumb #2, Franco Nero) by his side, we are treated to one of the cheapest looking space battles in cinema history.
I also notice that this film has the MGM logo at the beginning of it. They must have been so desperate for product in 1965 that they had to resort to importing Euro turkeys like this one. Besides which, Anthony Margheriti did much so much better in the horror genre that he should have stuck to it.
So if you're into MST3K-type effluent (which I'm not), then this is the film for you.
2 out of 10
The Crow
(1994)
Goth moron garbage
1 June 2004
Well it's not THAT bad, however I despise hype over a film that I didn't think was all that great to begin with.
I think a lot of the silly IMDb hero-worship (you see written below) over this film was due to the fact that Brandon Lee died during the making of it, and that all the kiddies from all around the world wanted to emulate the Goth look with a little dose of Marilyn Manson on the side.
Besides, I hate silly music videos and the angst metal crap on this thing, blew green snot....
In other words, it sucked...
Still, some of the visual CGI cityscapes looked cool for it's time and the storyline didn't insult my intelligence any, so I'll be kind and give it an average rating.
5 out of 10
I think a lot of the silly IMDb hero-worship (you see written below) over this film was due to the fact that Brandon Lee died during the making of it, and that all the kiddies from all around the world wanted to emulate the Goth look with a little dose of Marilyn Manson on the side.
Besides, I hate silly music videos and the angst metal crap on this thing, blew green snot....
In other words, it sucked...
Still, some of the visual CGI cityscapes looked cool for it's time and the storyline didn't insult my intelligence any, so I'll be kind and give it an average rating.
5 out of 10
Motel Hell
(1980)
Cannibalistic sausages sold in a motel hell
1 June 2004
Another 80s B classic that had a run at the drive-ins before drive-ins went out of style. Rory Calhoun and Nancy Parsons run a roadside motel that likes to slaughter it's guests and turn them into sausage.
They have a neat little slaughterhouse and smoke room out the back where they take their victims after planting them in a garden (with only their heads exposed) and fattening them up for the slaughter. And when the guest attendance at the motel falls off, Calhoun sets traps out on the highway for passing motorists so that he can add them to his garden.
It also has Nina Axelrod as the girl that Calhoun and Parson take pity on and 'adopt' as one of their own, and Paul Linke as the dumb sheriff who bumbles his way into finally ending Calhoun's operation, once and for all.
There's a clumsy little fight sequence in the smokehouse at the end involving knives and cleavers, with all the action taking place surrounding a vat filled with body parts.
Worth a one-time look. Brainless fun.
6 out of 10
They have a neat little slaughterhouse and smoke room out the back where they take their victims after planting them in a garden (with only their heads exposed) and fattening them up for the slaughter. And when the guest attendance at the motel falls off, Calhoun sets traps out on the highway for passing motorists so that he can add them to his garden.
It also has Nina Axelrod as the girl that Calhoun and Parson take pity on and 'adopt' as one of their own, and Paul Linke as the dumb sheriff who bumbles his way into finally ending Calhoun's operation, once and for all.
There's a clumsy little fight sequence in the smokehouse at the end involving knives and cleavers, with all the action taking place surrounding a vat filled with body parts.
Worth a one-time look. Brainless fun.
6 out of 10
Syngenor
(1990)
Grade D-
19 April 2004
Rented the newly released DVD of this and I'm glad I didn't buy it.
Carter Brown (David Gale) is the head of a corporation who develops synthetic creatures that to be used to fight wars in the Middle East. It's a creature that's adverse to water, but no matter since the desert doesn't have very much water to begin with. It also looks very similar to the gill man in CREATURE FROM THE BLACK LAGOON, so there's not a whole lot of imagination here.
Anyway, these SYNGENORS escape from the lab and invade the building killing people, but it's not very scary or gory or anything. In fact, the whole film looks like one big bore with David Gale looking like he's sleepwalking through the whole thing. He made a better ham in the RE-ANIMATOR series and the injecting of the green fluid into his neck is a silly cue from those earlier films.
Never heard of any of the rest of the cast except for Melanie Shatner as the receptionist, and that's only because she's Bill's daughter.
The Elite DVD has a short clip of David Gale visiting Japan in order to help promote this film, which I understand, was a big hit over there. Why, I don't know. Maybe they thought the creature was 'cute' or something.
It might've worked better if Roger Corman had a hand in it, but as it stands, it only gets a charitable failure.
2 out of 10
Carter Brown (David Gale) is the head of a corporation who develops synthetic creatures that to be used to fight wars in the Middle East. It's a creature that's adverse to water, but no matter since the desert doesn't have very much water to begin with. It also looks very similar to the gill man in CREATURE FROM THE BLACK LAGOON, so there's not a whole lot of imagination here.
Anyway, these SYNGENORS escape from the lab and invade the building killing people, but it's not very scary or gory or anything. In fact, the whole film looks like one big bore with David Gale looking like he's sleepwalking through the whole thing. He made a better ham in the RE-ANIMATOR series and the injecting of the green fluid into his neck is a silly cue from those earlier films.
Never heard of any of the rest of the cast except for Melanie Shatner as the receptionist, and that's only because she's Bill's daughter.
The Elite DVD has a short clip of David Gale visiting Japan in order to help promote this film, which I understand, was a big hit over there. Why, I don't know. Maybe they thought the creature was 'cute' or something.
It might've worked better if Roger Corman had a hand in it, but as it stands, it only gets a charitable failure.
2 out of 10
Crawlspace
(1986)
"I had her tongue cut out..."
19 April 2004
Hey I love this one. I've always been a Klaus Kinski fan and he's so particularly demented and soft-spoken from the get-go in this one, that he can't possibly be the good guy. No one with a German accent is.
He plays the Dr. Karl Gunther, son of a Nazi war criminal, who's escaped to America from Argentina and becomes an apartment manager. It also turns out that many of his tenants mysteriously disappear while the building is under his supervision.
It seems the 'good' Doctor can't stop killing them and he sets up his murders by crawling around in the building's heater ducts and observing his victims before making his move. There's also a woman he holds captive in an animal cage up in the attic, who he keeps as company after he's cut out her tongue.
Then innocent Lori Bancroft (Talia Balsam) moves in and Kinski takes a lot of interest in her before going on one final murder spree towards the end.
Also notable for being filmed on the same apartment building set as TROLL (1986), with all the action taking place indoors and in the heater ducts. Don't look for a wide variety of locations here. It's a small film.
Like I said, I enjoyed it and would recommend it mainly for Kinski's performance, but don't expect any extras on the MGM DVD because they're aren't any.
7 out of 10
He plays the Dr. Karl Gunther, son of a Nazi war criminal, who's escaped to America from Argentina and becomes an apartment manager. It also turns out that many of his tenants mysteriously disappear while the building is under his supervision.
It seems the 'good' Doctor can't stop killing them and he sets up his murders by crawling around in the building's heater ducts and observing his victims before making his move. There's also a woman he holds captive in an animal cage up in the attic, who he keeps as company after he's cut out her tongue.
Then innocent Lori Bancroft (Talia Balsam) moves in and Kinski takes a lot of interest in her before going on one final murder spree towards the end.
Also notable for being filmed on the same apartment building set as TROLL (1986), with all the action taking place indoors and in the heater ducts. Don't look for a wide variety of locations here. It's a small film.
Like I said, I enjoyed it and would recommend it mainly for Kinski's performance, but don't expect any extras on the MGM DVD because they're aren't any.
7 out of 10
Independence Day
(1996)
Probably the STUPIDEST, most overblown film of the 1990s
24 February 2004
And I can say that with complete candor. No question about it.
By the same a-hole director who brought us such hackneyed garbage as GODZILLA and THE PATRIOT comes this travesty of moviemaking that ranks as the worst of the 1990s. In fact, this makes BATTLEFIELD EARTH look like an unmitigated Academy Award winner, so there's really not that much further down the toilet you can go besides this one.
I had the misfortune of seeing this due to the urgings of a (then) girlfriend who was so enamored with all the hype making the rounds that we just; "had to go see it..."
And I'm sorry I did.
The plot has more holes in it than a pile of swiss cheese and the CGI looked animated and ridiculous. And Bill Pullman as the President leading the air force into battle against the (technologically superior) aliens, looked so stupid that only a dumb ass could be impressed by it. This is the kind of film that would appeal to CGI morons who think video games are 'high art'.
I'm not even gonna go on and on about it. That would be a waste of time and I've already wasted enough of it, as is.
Check out Tim Burton's MARS ATTACKS, instead. It's creatively 1,000 light years ahead of this waste of celluloid.
1 out of 10
By the same a-hole director who brought us such hackneyed garbage as GODZILLA and THE PATRIOT comes this travesty of moviemaking that ranks as the worst of the 1990s. In fact, this makes BATTLEFIELD EARTH look like an unmitigated Academy Award winner, so there's really not that much further down the toilet you can go besides this one.
I had the misfortune of seeing this due to the urgings of a (then) girlfriend who was so enamored with all the hype making the rounds that we just; "had to go see it..."
And I'm sorry I did.
The plot has more holes in it than a pile of swiss cheese and the CGI looked animated and ridiculous. And Bill Pullman as the President leading the air force into battle against the (technologically superior) aliens, looked so stupid that only a dumb ass could be impressed by it. This is the kind of film that would appeal to CGI morons who think video games are 'high art'.
I'm not even gonna go on and on about it. That would be a waste of time and I've already wasted enough of it, as is.
Check out Tim Burton's MARS ATTACKS, instead. It's creatively 1,000 light years ahead of this waste of celluloid.
1 out of 10
The Vampires Night Orgy
(1973)
Haunted, flesh-eating Spanish town
3 February 2004
Ok so there are no orgies, but who cares?
Hey this one isn't bad at all. Bus load of tourists takes a wrong turn and winds up in a town that at first seems un-inhabited but it turns out is filled with cannibalistic creatures who only come out at night. They're not really vampires but attack their victims en-mass and tear them to pieces. They also disable the bus so the stranded tourists can't escape. After all, we wouldn't want 'din-din' to run away, now would we?
Surprisingly, there's not a lot of gore in this considering the theme, but there's enough creepy atmosphere in this setting that it makes it mildly entertaining. The townspeople chasing the car with Jack Taylor and Dyanik Zurakowska reminds me of the chase scene in the recently released DAGON while the "they aren't to be believed" ending is straight out of TWO THOUSAND MANIACS.
You'll have to see all three of them to know what I'm talking about. Still, I recommend this one if you're into 70s Euro horror and want to see some sexy babes in it. Like Helga Line as the local, blood Countess. She was hot.
DVD is ok although the picture quality isn't anything to rave about, plus there are no extras except a trailer.
It's a few steps above anything Jess Franco was putting out at the time. I liked it. Check it out.
6 out of 10
Hey this one isn't bad at all. Bus load of tourists takes a wrong turn and winds up in a town that at first seems un-inhabited but it turns out is filled with cannibalistic creatures who only come out at night. They're not really vampires but attack their victims en-mass and tear them to pieces. They also disable the bus so the stranded tourists can't escape. After all, we wouldn't want 'din-din' to run away, now would we?
Surprisingly, there's not a lot of gore in this considering the theme, but there's enough creepy atmosphere in this setting that it makes it mildly entertaining. The townspeople chasing the car with Jack Taylor and Dyanik Zurakowska reminds me of the chase scene in the recently released DAGON while the "they aren't to be believed" ending is straight out of TWO THOUSAND MANIACS.
You'll have to see all three of them to know what I'm talking about. Still, I recommend this one if you're into 70s Euro horror and want to see some sexy babes in it. Like Helga Line as the local, blood Countess. She was hot.
DVD is ok although the picture quality isn't anything to rave about, plus there are no extras except a trailer.
It's a few steps above anything Jess Franco was putting out at the time. I liked it. Check it out.
6 out of 10
28 Days Later
(2002)
The DV looks like sh*t
9 January 2004
No wonder I hate digital cameras.
The whole film had a washed-out, slightly blurry look to it that I thought was a problem in the DVD transfer. It was only when I saw Boyle being interviewed in the extras explaining the use of a DV camera, that I realized why the whole look of this film is terrible. If they had used 35mm film instead, I would've rated it up a notch or two.
Once again, style replaces substance in an ever technoid quest to *improve* something that didn't need improvement to begin with. I want to see a rich, colorful landscape being portrayed on the big screen, not some mind-numbing to-look-at video-game. The BBC could've shot something better than this. In fact, it looks like something they did shoot.
The story itself about a plague destroying Britain is ok, I suppose. The acting wasn't bad although it would be better suited to Los Angeles or New York than the UK. That's probably why I liked THE OMEGA MAN (1971) better. Why do British films try to copy the Americans, anyway?
I'll give it a 6 for plot and a 1 for cinematic look.
Which rounds out to a 4 out of 10
The whole film had a washed-out, slightly blurry look to it that I thought was a problem in the DVD transfer. It was only when I saw Boyle being interviewed in the extras explaining the use of a DV camera, that I realized why the whole look of this film is terrible. If they had used 35mm film instead, I would've rated it up a notch or two.
Once again, style replaces substance in an ever technoid quest to *improve* something that didn't need improvement to begin with. I want to see a rich, colorful landscape being portrayed on the big screen, not some mind-numbing to-look-at video-game. The BBC could've shot something better than this. In fact, it looks like something they did shoot.
The story itself about a plague destroying Britain is ok, I suppose. The acting wasn't bad although it would be better suited to Los Angeles or New York than the UK. That's probably why I liked THE OMEGA MAN (1971) better. Why do British films try to copy the Americans, anyway?
I'll give it a 6 for plot and a 1 for cinematic look.
Which rounds out to a 4 out of 10
Stranded
(2001)
Hey, it beats SANTA CLAUS CONQUERS THE MARTIANS
9 January 2004
Actually, it's not that bad although Johnny Ramone is not an actor. Cue cards, Johnny?
And if you're looking for juvenile laser beams, Giger-like aliens and space shootouts, you'd be advised to look somewhere else, 'cause it ain't here.
I guess this rules out the Obi-Wan Kenobi crowd, huh?
Space crew crash lands on Mars instead of properly landing like they should have. They only have supplies for two people and three of them will have to go outside and die so the other two (Vincent Gallo & Maria de Medeiros) can live. Gallo, because he knows how to run the systems on board the ship, and de Medeiros because she's a medical doctor, leaving the others in the lurch as 'expendable'.
Pathetic move since the Gallo character is the most rancid one of the bunch and he's the one that deserves to die the most.
The inside of the shuttle looks NASA authentic enough and the outdoor shots in the Canary Islands (using an orange filter) could pass for Mars, but the cgi looks cheap, done by second year computer graphics students.
I hope Spain produces more sci-fi since we don't see very much of this genre coming from that part of the world. Too bad this film won't be the best example of that.
Below average.
4 out of 10
And if you're looking for juvenile laser beams, Giger-like aliens and space shootouts, you'd be advised to look somewhere else, 'cause it ain't here.
I guess this rules out the Obi-Wan Kenobi crowd, huh?
Space crew crash lands on Mars instead of properly landing like they should have. They only have supplies for two people and three of them will have to go outside and die so the other two (Vincent Gallo & Maria de Medeiros) can live. Gallo, because he knows how to run the systems on board the ship, and de Medeiros because she's a medical doctor, leaving the others in the lurch as 'expendable'.
Pathetic move since the Gallo character is the most rancid one of the bunch and he's the one that deserves to die the most.
The inside of the shuttle looks NASA authentic enough and the outdoor shots in the Canary Islands (using an orange filter) could pass for Mars, but the cgi looks cheap, done by second year computer graphics students.
I hope Spain produces more sci-fi since we don't see very much of this genre coming from that part of the world. Too bad this film won't be the best example of that.
Below average.
4 out of 10
FleshEater
(1988)
Funny, awful movie
9 January 2004
I have to somewhat admire the chutzpah of Bill Hinzman for releasing one of the worst horror films of the 1980s. I also have to admire the chutzpah of Shriek for giving this one the star treatment on DVD. The acting is pretty bad, the special effects are so-so and the plot is pretty derivative of anything George Romero has done. And it also adds to the charm of it all.
Story goes like this; a farmer pulls up a tree trunk while clearing some land and exposes a wooden coffin containing Bill Hinzman who's been buried there for the last 20 years or so. Ever since his appearance in NIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD (1968), right? He pulls the farmer down in the coffin and starts chewing on his neck.
Some college students are having a party in the woods, drinking lots of Iron City Beer (I'm sure Iron City appreciated the plug) and they start getting bitten by Hinzman and the farmer who by now has turned into a zombie, himself.
The remaining students flee and barricade themselves inside a farmhouse, but the zombies break through and kill most of them. From there it spreads like wildfire just like it did back in 1968 as more and more people in the surrounding area are bitten. I thought the scene of the dead mutilated cop rising up out of the drivers seat of his squad car and getting shot in the head (or what was left of it) was pretty funny. So were the remaining scenes of the zombies getting shot by the locals. The whole thing looked so amateurish that I had to laugh at it all.
The Shriek DVD does the best it can with the 16mm film print and the crappy sound. I think while they were filming this thing, they didn't have the directional microphones pointing in the right direction because the volume of the dialog suddenly gets louder in parts. I also think there was some clumsy overdubbing done but I can't confirm this.
Extras include a long slide show of stills made during filming (man, they must have gone through a couple of rolls of film!) and an hour long interview with Hinzman and a couple of the crew. Filmed outside beautiful Pittsburgh, of course. Where else? (laughs)
Since it's so bad it's good, I think I'm gonna be generous about it.
5 out of 10
Story goes like this; a farmer pulls up a tree trunk while clearing some land and exposes a wooden coffin containing Bill Hinzman who's been buried there for the last 20 years or so. Ever since his appearance in NIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD (1968), right? He pulls the farmer down in the coffin and starts chewing on his neck.
Some college students are having a party in the woods, drinking lots of Iron City Beer (I'm sure Iron City appreciated the plug) and they start getting bitten by Hinzman and the farmer who by now has turned into a zombie, himself.
The remaining students flee and barricade themselves inside a farmhouse, but the zombies break through and kill most of them. From there it spreads like wildfire just like it did back in 1968 as more and more people in the surrounding area are bitten. I thought the scene of the dead mutilated cop rising up out of the drivers seat of his squad car and getting shot in the head (or what was left of it) was pretty funny. So were the remaining scenes of the zombies getting shot by the locals. The whole thing looked so amateurish that I had to laugh at it all.
The Shriek DVD does the best it can with the 16mm film print and the crappy sound. I think while they were filming this thing, they didn't have the directional microphones pointing in the right direction because the volume of the dialog suddenly gets louder in parts. I also think there was some clumsy overdubbing done but I can't confirm this.
Extras include a long slide show of stills made during filming (man, they must have gone through a couple of rolls of film!) and an hour long interview with Hinzman and a couple of the crew. Filmed outside beautiful Pittsburgh, of course. Where else? (laughs)
Since it's so bad it's good, I think I'm gonna be generous about it.
5 out of 10
Society
(1989)
Hey, this is pretty cool...
9 January 2004
So it makes fun of rich people. Big deal. Get over it.
I was really surprised by this one since I had never heard of it before. It's got imagination of plot with good latex special effects, and a satirical social statement about the 1980s without sounding preachy or condescending. And it sticks in my mind too, even weeks after seeing it.
Bill Whitney (soap-opera actor Billy Warlock) notices some strange things about his rich Beverly Hills parents that he's always wondered about, but winds up putting it in the back of his mind. For one thing, he doesn't bear any family resemblance towards them. For another, they always seem to be good-natured about things they shouldn't be good natured about. Same thing goes for his sister and all the other people in Billy's life. His neighbors, his friends at school, etc...
He hears a tape his friend made of his parents having incestual orgies with his sister and it blows his mind. Billy also starts seeing things like his parents and his sister's bodies bend and twist into strange contortions like rubber. He thinks he's losing his mind and is seeing a psychiatrist who doesn't believe him.
The scene where his father's face is superimposed over his buttocks is awesome! And the 'orgy' at the end is pretty indescribable. People melt and absorb into one another and are covered in sticky goo. The part where Billy's hand goes up a guy's buttocks and pulls the other guy's body inside out with his innards lying all over the floor, is pretty mind-blowing, too. Well done!
I consider this an excellent 80s horror classic by Brian Yuzna who also had an important hand in the RE-ANIMATOR films. It starts out looking like a conventional 1980s Hollywood teenage film, but then begins to descend into something else which kept me on edge.
Unfortunately the double-sided Anchor Bay DVD that I saw (teamed up with SPONTANEOUS COMBUSTION) didn't come with any extras. Even just a director's commentary would've been nice.
I liked this one and recommend it for those who want something different from the usual teenage-slasher flicks.
Weird stuff.
7 out of 10
I was really surprised by this one since I had never heard of it before. It's got imagination of plot with good latex special effects, and a satirical social statement about the 1980s without sounding preachy or condescending. And it sticks in my mind too, even weeks after seeing it.
Bill Whitney (soap-opera actor Billy Warlock) notices some strange things about his rich Beverly Hills parents that he's always wondered about, but winds up putting it in the back of his mind. For one thing, he doesn't bear any family resemblance towards them. For another, they always seem to be good-natured about things they shouldn't be good natured about. Same thing goes for his sister and all the other people in Billy's life. His neighbors, his friends at school, etc...
He hears a tape his friend made of his parents having incestual orgies with his sister and it blows his mind. Billy also starts seeing things like his parents and his sister's bodies bend and twist into strange contortions like rubber. He thinks he's losing his mind and is seeing a psychiatrist who doesn't believe him.
The scene where his father's face is superimposed over his buttocks is awesome! And the 'orgy' at the end is pretty indescribable. People melt and absorb into one another and are covered in sticky goo. The part where Billy's hand goes up a guy's buttocks and pulls the other guy's body inside out with his innards lying all over the floor, is pretty mind-blowing, too. Well done!
I consider this an excellent 80s horror classic by Brian Yuzna who also had an important hand in the RE-ANIMATOR films. It starts out looking like a conventional 1980s Hollywood teenage film, but then begins to descend into something else which kept me on edge.
Unfortunately the double-sided Anchor Bay DVD that I saw (teamed up with SPONTANEOUS COMBUSTION) didn't come with any extras. Even just a director's commentary would've been nice.
I liked this one and recommend it for those who want something different from the usual teenage-slasher flicks.
Weird stuff.
7 out of 10
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