theguys1 Reviews

Slacker Cats (2007–2009)

surprisingly witty

[7/10 · 14 August 2007]

When I first saw the commercial for this show, I had the worst hopes for it. The commercials ABC Family put out only displayed the poop and fart jokes in the show, which there are not many of when you get to watch an entire episode. Unlike Family Guy, this show has actual wit and humor, with the addition of some fart jokes. That I didn't even mind, because the humor lasted throughout the length of the episode, not in the first two minutes and then resorted to childish poopy in the potty jokes. Although there were some disturbing aspects of the show, I won't hold that against them because it is very rare that a show can both make you laugh and keep you excited for the next episode to come.

Fear X (2003)

red hallways and dark corridors alone do not a thriller make

[1/10 · 24 September 2006]

Red hallways and dark corridors. This is all this "thriller" has to offer. And it's not even scary. It doesn't even change your idea of the movie for a second. Bottom line: Fear X is the worst, most boring film I have seen in my life.

It tries to tell the story of a man whose wife was notoriously murdered. He looks at the surveillance tape showing her death, he has senseless visions, he even sneaks into the house across the street and searches in there too. Well, at the beginning of the film, it creates the idea that he is really determined to find his wife's killer, but he doesn't look hard enough. Fear X is one of those movies that you can easily fall asleep during, and you can wake up and still follow the story perfectly. Most of the scenes last way too long, without those awkward silences packed in there, this failure of a film would be about 50 minutes long. I must say that I'm surprised that I got through the whole thing. I fell asleep halfway for only ten minutes, but I didn't miss anything. And I know. The movie starts out as a thriller and ends as a huge mess unfolding before your slowly imploding eyes. If you want to see the movie, rent it. Don't buy it. It's definitely not worth it.

Saved (2006)

next to 4400, this is my favorite summer show

[10/10 · 9 July 2006]

"Saved" in one word is art. Let's see, why can't we have a medical drama that doesn't take place in the hospital? Oh, I got it! Let's put a couple dudes into an ambulance and put it on right after the world's most watched show so people will change the channel at 9:59 and watch HGTV for the rest of the night! Frankly, I knew this show was going to be bagged on from the start. You know why? Because it's entertaining and The Closer isn't. I for one certainly hope they keep this one because it is not to be missed. And for all you folks that are home watching Closer and turn the TV off when it ends, just give this show a chance. It is not a ripoff of that distasteful sex crap you call Rescue Me.

Waking Life (2001)

very, very amazing and thought-provoking movie

[10/10 · 9 June 2006]

I just watched this movie alone, meaning no one else was in the house. I had read a lot about this movie, expecting a lot from it. I really don't know what I'd expected. Did I expect it to be scary? There were some creepy parts. Did I expect it to be boring? It was all talking, but the conversations were just so intriguing. Did I expect it to be a thriller? It wasn't a thriller, just an excellent motion picture based on revealing the meaning of life. I feel it accomplished that very well.

Waking Life makes you wonder about thousands of things. Is life actually a vivid dream we are just pawns walking around in? Did all of the people we learn about each and every day really exist? What is history? What is sight? What is smell? What is sound? Do we even have memories or are they just fantasized stories that we create? Is every minute that passes still reoccurring in the past? We could all be adults right now but in another universe we could still be present in our mother's womb. Waking Life does not answer all of these questions, my friends, but it does give you an idea of what actually happens when you close your eyes at night.

The 4400 (2004–2007)

amazing TV series

[10/10 · 3 June 2006]

The 4400 is easily one of the best sci-fi shows on television. Every episode builds up suspense almost as cleverly as 24. You form a bond with all of the characters as the series progresses and it leaves you on the edge of your seat, wanting so much more. I honestly must say I can't wait for next season. Any of these absent-minded posters who give this show a bad rating should be ignored.

Each episode features another 4400 that has interesting abilities from the future and usually their powers have a repercussion, and Tom Baldwin and his team at NTAC try everything they can to bring the 4400 to justice or help them balance their powers.

The 4400 is a winner, and you will not be disappointed if you watch it. Rating: 10/10.

Freddie (2005–2006)

frankly, I liked him much more in Scooby-Doo

[7 January 2006]

The main point of this review: The show never changes. It's all about girls and parties every single antagonizing episode. I could relate this to Everybody Hates Chris (which I also reviewed) but the shows are nothing like each other, even though they're both horrible and should not have been picked up for full seasons. I can't see why they didn't cancel this show already. The humor is offbeat and the show is a complete waste of half an hour. Many probably will not agree with me but I rest my case. And I don't necessarily mean the summary I wrote, just in case you were wondering. Freddie Prinze, Jr. just isn't funny and his dumb friend doesn't support the show anymore than he does.

Cursed (2005)

seeing 2 suckish movies of Wes Craven's is enough for me

[4/10 · 11 August 2005]

In my summary, I said that there were two suckish movies of Wes Craven's that I saw. Well, one of them is this failure of a movie, and the other is copying something from the past, and that movie is Dracula 2000. Dracula is old-school, werewolves are old-school, and putting them into movies that aren't even thrilling or scary just doesn't cut it. For one thing, in Cursed, there is no reason for the homosexual references. Without a doubt, it must be more revealing in the Unrated version of the film. And the werewolves don't look real or convincing. I don't even know why people keep making movies of stuff that is way out of style. If you want to see a good thriller, see one with an original plot and a good twist at the end.

Dragonfly (2002)

keeps you wondering

[10/10 · 29 July 2005]

This movie has got it all. Thrills, chills, and questionable scenes that keep you begging for more. In a good thriller, there's a theme that takes off in the beginning and keeps giving you clues until you think you've figured out the whole story. Then, something else happens and changes around your whole idea of the movie. This movie has a great actor, a great plot line, and a great ending. This is a movie that you'll definitely give a two-thumbs-way-up.

Many can probably relate to this supernatural thriller and realize that it is not only scary, but it has a heart built into it. 10/10*. When someone dies...are they really gone forever?

The Rundown (2003)

Christopher Walken ruined it

[7/10 · 28 July 2005]

**SPOILERS** While all the cool explosions and action scenes are happening in this movie, the camera shows a close-up of this guy's face and he makes an unfunny joke like, "That's a lot of cows" or "Boom, Boom, Boom." This is supposed to be an action adventure flick and with Christopher Walken speaking with such boring poetry that sounds like it came from the 1700's, this movie really starts to tank after a while. I'm saying honestly and openly that Christopher Walken does not belong in this movie and the movie is not exactly The Rock's big break. I'm not trying to forbid you from seeing this picture, because all the scenes without Walken are all right. I hope Rock stars in better movies than this and isn't teamed up with Walken again, cause it won't work.

The Even Stevens Movie (2003 TV Movie)

an excellent comedic Disney movie coming from a great show!

[9/10 · 23 July 2005]

Even Stevens is a show that cracks me up and always keeps me begging for more. And finally, they come up with an idea for the movie to follow the series. This is a great movie that I would say all kids should be permitted to watch. The movie is about the Stevens taking a vacation on the deserted island of Menehune (or something like that) and they end up getting tricked by a show host who sneaks cameras in the bushes of the island and passes off what he films as a reality show. This is not a five-star movie from Disney, but it sure is a funny one. I hope Disney makes more comedies like this, and I can see they already have.

I Do, They Don't (2005 TV Movie)

I guess it's okay, but some things are unnecessary

[3/10 · 23 July 2005]

This movie does not really promote kids to be nicer and have better attitudes, as a family movie should, and this wouldn't be considered family anyway because it has some things in it that children shouldn't be seeing. Not the best ABC Family film if you ask me. If there were less sexual themes in the movie, then maybe it would be better. Hollywood isn't doing anything to make a movie better by adding in sexual situations. There's really no reason for them. At least this is a TV movie. I wouldn't want to waste my money on this garbage by renting it. If you have other things to do other than watch this movie, please proceed to them.

Yakkity Yak (2002– )

worst TV show ever to hit Nick

[22 July 2005]

This and Mucha Lucha are the worst shows on television. Whoever they hired for the voices of the characters, I feel deep sorrow for them for being on such a show. The grandmother Yak is the scariest because she looks like a toddler drew her and not one bit of this show is funny. Actually, all the characters on this show look like a baby drew them. If I were you, I wouldn't watch this or Mucha Lucha. I'm so glad they took this off Nick. It was beyond annoying.

For a cartoon to be a success, you have to have some conflict and unforgettable characters that people will love. Shows like Catscratch, Ed, Edd n Eddy, and Spongebob have this element well put in. Yakkity Yak does not.

Diary of a Mad Black Woman (2005)

a pretty good romance comedy; almost as good as Hitch

[9/10 · 22 July 2005]

Overall, this movie is more of a drama than it is a comedy. If you want to see this, please know that you're renting a movie that is a mix of comedy and drama. But this movie was very good and I liked it a lot. Some romances are okay with me like this one and Hitch, and others that are part music and romance creep me out. All of the bad reviews on this movie shouldn't be paid attention to because it was a movie with conflict and heart. Sure, it might be very tense, but without Madea and her brother in the movie, it would be absolutely nothing. My point mainly is that this is a great movie that you can watch with your kids and your husband/wife, as long as the kids are at a proper age.

Master and Commander: The Far Side of the World (2003)

the worst movie of the year!

[1/10 · 20 July 2005]

There are many things wrong with this movie. First of all, a good story should take into the plot before the first hour rushes by, and there has to be a meaning in a movie that will keep the audience begging for more; not falling asleep in their chairs and snoring louder than the sound of a bullet being shot from a gun. And the bottom line pretty much is that SOMETHING HAS TO HAPPEN IN THE FRICKIN MOVIE!!!!!!!! There is not even 30 seconds of action one minute, and then it's just singing folk songs on the ship and eating slop while celebrating. And worst of all, they make jokes that aren't even funny! I'm sorry to say that to the people that worked 3 years on this movie that it completely sucks and it was a complete waste of their valuable time. I'm not much of a war movie fan, but I know a bad movie when I see one, no matter what genre. I understand that this is a war movie telling a true story about actual people, but it's not worthy of being shown on the big screen.

Everybody Loves Raymond (1996–2005)

funny stuff there, funny stuff

[19 July 2005]

Everybody Loves Raymond is one of the funniest shows on TV and it has first-rate comedy and characters. There is absolutely nothing wrong with this show, and it has funny plots and funny endings. With who is the funniest, I'd say it's either Rob, Raymond, or Frank. Frank is a character that doesn't appreciate anything mainly because he hates the world. Rob is a really hilarious character who thinks that he's under-appreciated and that Raymond is one that's the most loved. His deep voice is what gives him a funny personality. Raymond is the main character that doesn't know a lot about life and takes chances that end up biting him in the butt later on. This is a really funny show and I hope they never kill it.

Life Is Ruff (2005 TV Movie)

this is a Disney movie that overcomes all before it!

[10/10 · 18 July 2005]

The two Disney Channel movies that are the absolute best are Tru Confessions and Life is Ruff. This has a great story about a selfish kid named Calvin (Kyle Massey) who collects Gotham Man comics and to receive the first ever comic of the Gotham Man comic series, he has to learn responsibility by teaching a big dog new tricks. This movie reminds me of Air Bud and Shiloh, except that those are dramas and this is a first-rate comedy that hits high on my account. If you miss this movie, you'll really be missing something you can watch and enjoy with friends, because they will all be talking about it afterward. The only dog movie that could ever top this one is My Dog Skip. 10/10*

Dracula 2000 (2000)

a Dracula for a new millennium

[1/10 · 18 July 2005]

Dracula 2000 is not really scary as it is disgusting and too revealing. What I mean is the sexual content is way too much and sort of spoils the scary element of Dracula, and the blood was too much for me to stand.

I understand Wes Craven was trying to make this as scary as possible, but the only thing scary about it is seeing Dracula at the end of a hallway hungrily looking at you. And he could've used a person to play Dracula that girls wouldn't completely drool over, but of course Dracula has to have that "charm" to attract his prey. I haven't seen any other Dracula movies, but I can already tell that this isn't the best one they've made. Some scenes are scary, some are just too sexual and revealing. They have all these new gadgets and stuff because it's in 2000, but the movie itself isn't that good.

All Grown Up! (2003–2008)

worse than juniper lee

[13 July 2005]

This is a show about teenager-wannabees that are 10 years old. The first few episodes of this were all right and they were doing well with Nickelodeon and I enjoyed them, but the new ones have easily-solved plots and spastic drama from (guess who) Angelica and Susie. My little sister watches this and I can see her sometimes getting ticked off because of the stupid lines of the characters. I'm trying to make this show bad and I'm also trying to make a persuasive argument. I could relate this to Fairly Oddparents, which also has easy-to-solve plots and sappy lines. Nickelodeon is going down the tubes and if 3-year-olds are watching it daily, don't be surprised if they start blurting out phrases like, "Whatever!" and, "So yesterday, galfriend!" I admit that I'm exaggerating this show, but with the previous sappy shows of Nickelodeon backing me up, my point is pretty clear.

Codename: Kids Next Door (2002–2008)

dramatic

[13 July 2005]

Cartoon Network has a number of shows that are enjoyable, but this one is something that you're forced to watch in the morning if Blues Clues is on Nick and the frickin' Doodlebops are showing on Disney Channel. Some episodes are OK, to say the least, but others are just so annoying I can't stand watching them.

Numbuh 1 is the way too persistent leader that never gives up. Numbuh 2 is a geeky fat kid that has an annoying little brother. Numbuh 3 is the sort-of adorable one that keeps the show together although it's still bad. Numbuh 4 is an aggressive Australian kid that always wants to "kick butt." Numbuh 5 is a black girl that is kinda like Numbuh 1.

And they have those mega-annoying villains that call out the same phrases like, "Once I get domination of the Kids Next Door moonbase, I'll control the entire world! Wa-ha-ha-ha!" and, "Curse you, Kids Next Door! I shall get my revenge!" And I'm not fibbing about that. If you don't believe me, watch the show and have your own opinion. This is a waste of 30 minutes, almost as much as Mucha Lucha.

Fear Factor (I) (2001–2012)

wild thang, you make my heart scream

[13 July 2005]

I just read that all the gross food they have to eat is FDA approved and thank God for that. I love this show and I'm guessing it would be really fun to be a guest on it. This show tests not only what you can accomplish, but it tests how long you can keep your patience and what special talents you have that you can use. It doesn't matter if one is weak or strong, it only matters what hidden talents can spring out of the open when times are tough. This is a good adventure show and it really isn't about fear for the viewers, only for the contestants. The way they set up the stunts is pretty predictable sometimes, like: the first stunt always has to do with water or something related to propelling in the sky, the second stunt is related to eating something disgusting, and the third is walking on a spinning platform or dealing with water once again. And the grand prize is some heavy dough. I'd like to win 50 grand. But I'm just 13, so I might have to wait a while.

Catscratch (2005–2007)

a fun show

[10 July 2005]

This is a show that will brighten up your day and I believe it is the funniest show since Spongebob. This show is original because it gives you a different idea of cats. Usually, shows describe cats as sassy creatures, but then comes the one Nickelodeon show that makes them seem as normal as dogs, even though they don't really look like cats. Nickelodeon down't have many great shows, but this is a great one that will have you cracking up and begging for more. My favorite character is Waffle mainly because he reminds me of Ed in Ed, Edd n Eddy. No cartoon will ever top this one and I'm sure of that. I give this show 10 out of 10 stars.

Hide and Seek (2005)

frightening, almost like watching a nightmare on a TV screen

[10/10 · 7 July 2005]

Hide and Seek is an excellent, suspenseful thriller about a girl who finds an imaginary friend after her mom dies. Some of the scenes in this movie are very disturbing, and this reminds me of something that M. Night Shyamalan would direct. But ever since the mishap with his unsuccessful movie The Village, I think this story is far above his ideas. Robert DeNiro plays an excellent role in this heavily frightening film and is suspicious about Emily's new invisible friend. You don't have to see the film repeatedly to get the ending; you just need to listen to everything that happens and everything that has to do with Charlie. This movie is scary indeed, and I absolutely loved it.

Alien (1979)

the words amazing and stupefying don't define this movie; the words stupid and dull do

[2/10 · 6 July 2005]

This is not a scary movie, but indeed a gross one. The reasons this movie is stupid are that they wasted the first hour of the film doing absolutely nothing, and there was so much use of unnecessary gore and graphic violence that it made the film ridiculously stupid. Just take out the "stupi" in stupefying and add a D to the end. That will tell you everything you need to know. If you want a scary movie that won't make you heave when you look at water and milk and think they're alien drool, don't rent this garbage. I wish I had never seen this disgusting film, because I truly would have been better off without seeing it. Back then in the 70's, scary movies were absolutely disgusting and gory, so I'd rent something new that's from our time if I were you.

Tru Confessions (2002 TV Movie)

a winning movie, especially to receive from Disney

[10/10 · 1 July 2005]

Tru Confessions is the best Disney Channel movie yet, and they could never top this one. The element that gives the movie it's heart is that it gives you an inside look at mentally challenged person. They are no different than everyone else in the world, and some people don't realize that today. They treat them like garbage, which they are most definitely not. If you watch this movie, it will change your idea of looking at mentally challenged citizens and being scared. This is the best Disney film ever made not only because it delivers a message, but also because it has a heart. This is truly a masterpiece, and it is worth watching.

The King of Queens (1998–2007)

this is a hilarious show

[1 July 2005]

Every night after Malcolm in the Middle, I watch a double dose of this show on UPN 9 at 7. There are some problems with the show, but the rest is just pure hilarity. The problems are mostly that often in the episodes Doug might start up a topic and he and Carrie fight about the topic throughout the whole episode. Despite the topics, the show has great characters with original personalities. Arthur is a hilarious character that I think the show couldn't do without. This show reminds me of Everybody Loves Raymond, which is just as funny, but King of Queens' comedic jokes are easier to figure out than Raymond's. This is a good way to spend an hour of your time, because you'll love it.