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Reviews
The Mystery of Spoon River (2000)
What the hell is this?
During this film, I mostly laughed! But this was not supposed to be a comedy. I am not sure how a half cocked plot like this even gets the funding to be put on film. Keeping in mind that Ghost's is not a big budget movie, but a bargain bin cast in the back woods of Central Illinois... I still have a hard time giving it a break. Bad Acting, Poor Plot, plus some racial and social stereotyping that have to be seen to be believed. All contribute to making this film barely watchable. There were a few special effects that surprised me with good quality.
If your favorite movies are in the Genre of "Mystery Science Theatre" fare... Then this is your movie. Otherwise, go rent Blaire Witch again, and see how far decent acting, and a good plot can take a low budget movie.
All Souls Day: Dia de los Muertos (2005)
When Zombies are Boring...look out!
I just watched this chunk on Sci Fi and it's just about as bad as you might expect. The story might have worked if it weren't so talky and unimaginative. Everything on Sci Fi is talky but this has the most annoying lead character ever. And is sounds to me like they have encouraged him to improvise...not a good idea. Then, when things seem unbearable, more bad acting comes along with his friends. There is no mood, or pacing, it drags and stumbles and it makes one wonder if anyone was actually supervising this dog. The zombies have okay make up but who cares when you hate the people they are trying to eat. And their are probably six action scenes in the whole thing. It reminds me of a kids at cowboys and Indians where the storytellers don't have any concept of the audience. Who is the audience anyway. I blame sci fi for this one, it seems like their only criteria somewhat high production values and a David Keith. I say check out Bloody Bill if you want this story done better.
The Passion of the Christ (2004)
Ah the good old days!
Once again you Christians gather around to celebrate the torture and murder of Jesus. Good Times! Yes the performances of Jesus and the others are convincing. The Photography is beautiful and the script isn't too bad and the gore effects are off the hook, but this just a movie. An extremely violent movie at that. Hey, I love a good Friday the 13th or Road Warrior flick, sure thing baby. But that's good time fantasy violence. But you sick freaks who love to watch your own messiah tortured to death are beyond my understanding. If you love someone so much, the thought of seeing them tortured to death seems inconceivable. Do you think the families of 911 watch that tape over and over again. You people should seek some help. As a side note, this film was made with Mel's own money and distributed independently. Cheers to you Mel, you nut. You made the highest grossing indie of all time!
Kill Bill: Vol. 2 (2004)
8.2 you've got to be kidding
Usually a director would get to at least his fifties before he forgot how to make a movie. Like so many wunderkind this guy reads too much of his own press. The extended dialogues of his earlier work at least had some original thoughts. This film is laced with clichés and generic characters. I didn't like the first one but it at least had some interesting and different film styles. This one plods on like a wounded animal just waiting to be shot. Who cares if she kills him or not. The fight scenes are good but like a Hong Kong action film you have to suffer though endless dialogue. And this film is nowhere near as cool as he thinks it is. Don't waste your time, this is a dried up husk with nothing to offer it's audience.
The Puppet Masters (1994)
Great little Invasion redux!
This is a unknown very satisfying alien film. This film moves along at a nice pace. The aliens are creepy and the action is almost non stop. They throw a lot of great turns in the story and the acting is pretty solid. The film even has a cameo from the talentless Richard Belzer who actually does a decent job. I would have liked some nudity in this story but you can't have it all. This film is pre CGI so it has an awesome selection of effects done on set. It's hard to believe they could make such a good movie from a Hienlin book. Whatever, just see it.
Torque (2004)
Don't be fooled by low numbers...this movie kicks ass!
I just don't get it...the bottom 60. It just doesn't make any sense. Was it the incredible camera work, the hot chicks in leather. The over the top stunts. What is not to like about this movie? Every shot in this film is masterfully composed. The lighting and CG work were off the hook. Sure the script is a little light but it wasn't claiming to be Lawrence of Arabia. Torque, get it! I love this movie and own it. I have no connection to anyone involved with this film. I just really dig it! You will too!
9 out of 10