rocknroll_demon Reviews

V/H/S (2012)

A nice idea that falls flat on its face.

[3/10 · 27 August 2012]

First of all, credit where credit is due: the concept of this film is pretty good. But like a lot of good ideas being batted about in Movieland these days, the eventual product leaves a lot to be desired.

Unforgivable for a horror film is a distinct lack of horror. Indeed, it is only the 'Haunted House' segment that comes anywhere close to generating any real fear. The rest of the movie is just an excuse for gratuitous gore, nudity and cheap shocks.

The stories range from the absolute stupid to the just bizarre, with one or two interesting ones thrown in. The characters are all typical one dimensional eye candy, or are morose, perverted, borderline rapist fratboys who are so annoying that when the inevitable death scenes take place, we simply don't give a crap about them.

I understand that it is a 'found footage' movie, but the camera-work is so shoddy that it is the only thing that genuinely makes you feel queasy. And if you don't feel ill, you will certainly feel annoyed about halfway through story one.

On top of this is a very noticeable lack of payoff at the end. If you have any questions during the movie, please don't expect them to be answered at the end.

If you really have nothing better to do then watch this. But if you have something more entertaining, like the laundry, then do that instead.

Or just buy a camera and make your own.

The Raid: Redemption (2011)

Somebody tell Hollywood this is how to make an action movie.

[9/10 · 19 August 2012]

This movie is blistering.

I honestly don't have a bad word against this movie.

The story may be seen as simplistic, but I think that is no problem as we are here for the action, not the drama. And let's face it, Die Hard - the quintessential action movie of our generation - has a simplistic story line. Forget twists, plot turns, narrative devices, and give us balls-out, no holds barred action scenes.

The choreography of the fight scenes is stunning, so much effort has been put in that you should watch it for that alone! There are some real scenes of tension to counteract the bone-crunching violence, and this just makes for a superb pacing throughout the movie.

The acting is top-notch, and the fact that is was directed by a Welshie makes it even better! Some excellent cinematography too.

Admittedly, not everyone likes action, but if you do then don't waste time reading this review. Watch this movie.

9/10

The Cabin in the Woods (2011)

It doesn't take itself seriously.... so neither should you.

[5/10 · 19 August 2012]

I can't understand why people are giving this movie one or two stars: it honestly is not that bad!

OK, so it isn't going to win any awards, or be lauded in the top 100 movies of all time, but if you enjoy this movie for what it is - a pretty stupid horror-comedy - then you will not be disappointed.

I think what most people seem to be having trouble with is the comparison to The Evil Dead (admittedly, a far superior film). The only comparison I really saw was the fact that it take place in a cabin in the woods. And what the smeg do you expect from a film that has the title 'The Cabin in the Woods'?!? OK, it has zombies/demons too, but these are totally different to the ones in Raimi's work. They aren't funny for a start.

The biggest problem I had was with the sloppy CGI. Some of it looked dated, and some of it just dumb. But money was spent where it needed to be spent. The monsters/demons is where the good CGI lays. Luckily, the extra money seems to have been paid to the cast who all do a really good job (and a nice bit of eye candy too!)It had some really good atmospheric scenes with good amounts of tension, but when the actual shocks came, it was too little too late.

Overall, if you go into this movie expecting big things then of course you will be disappointed. But watch this knowing that it is a tongue-in- cheek poke at the genre and you will have a good time.

It's not the best movie ever, but it sure as hell (pun intended) isn't the worst either.

5/10

Wrecked (2010)

Enough to keep you wondering.... but not enough to keep you entertained.

[3/10 · 23 July 2012]

Let's face it - this film is dull. I honestly think I have wasted 90 minutes of my life watching this movie. It's not that it is a BAD movie, it's more like it is one in which nobody tried very hard. But first, a defence: Adrien Brody does enough to allow us to sympathise with his character. We want to find out what has happened and who he is. The photography is pretty good too, but even a monkey can get some decent shots of a nature background.

The problems come with the story, and the six foot wide gaping plot holes that tag along with it. Firstly, it is boring. More boring than I can say. As mentioned, if it weren't for Adrien Brody's acting (which has been a damn sight better in the past), I would have turned it off. Nothing happens, and when it does happen there is no excitement, no thrill, just stupidity followed by blind luck. The worst thing about this movie is the questions that are left at the end: we find out what happened and who he is, but:

1. If he drove off the road, why does he not look for the road rather than crawling around the forest for days?

2. What happened to the guy in the cave? And if it is what I think it is, why could he not fend it off with a big rifle?

3. We see four men in the car when he causes the crash, but one man is left on the road. How did he fall out of the car, how did that kill him and how did no one see him as they were driving past?

4. In a forest full of trees and wood, he could not have made himself a crutch to help him walk rather than crawl around everywhere?

A film that leaves you with that many questions is simply not worth your time. If you want to watch Brody flex his acting muscles, watch The Pianist again. If you want to see a movie with a good story... well, you can do better than this.

Jurassic Park (1993)

Almost one of the best.

[9/10 · 7 July 2012]

I saw this film in the cinema when it came out, and it was the definition of "Blockbuster" - people were lined up around the block to get into the cinema. That is how popular, successful and downright groundbreaking this film was and still is.

"Groundbreaking" is a tossed-around term these days, but Jurassic Park is definitely worth the accolade. The dinosaurs (whilst maybe a bit outdated now) are frighteningly real. How they look, how they sound and how they move is as life-like as anyone can imagine. Apart from the dinosaurs, the cast is pretty impressive. Sam Neill is as good as ever and Jeff Goldblum brings a good element of humour to scenes of great tension.Even the kids do a great job during the nail-biting kitchen scene.

The master of summer blockbusters, Spielberg, does not disappoint his audience with this. No messing about - you want entertainment, you got it! Action, comedy, adventure, scares, Samuel L Jackson - it's all there. The scriptwriters do a pretty good job of staying faithful to Crichton's vision in the novel too.

Apart from a few problems with the story (an electric fence designed to put off giant dinosaurs does minimal damage to a 12 year old boy), and a bit of artistic licence with dinosaur facts, this movie is and will remain a firm favourite with many, many people.

Do yourself a favour and check out the DVD extras too - it is truly amazing how they designed and created the dinosaurs.