This is veritable mishmash of indie movie tropes put together in one cutesy little boring film. Think "dull" Greta Gerwig or Noah Baumbach and you would be close to how this movie feels and plays out. It pretends to be do a different take on the meandering life of its very confused protagonist (which means her motivations are usually a total mystery) by using some very done to death tropes like that "children are so annoying at a family party" scene or an overlong "cutesy no touch romantic scene" or using a onscreen narrative device in the most annoying and inconsistent fashion. The filmmaker here is going for whimsical smartness but ending up as ho hum sleep inducing ride which just recycles what has been done before in a very very dull way. Please avoid.
Reviews
23 Reviews
Portrait of a Lady on Fire
(2019)
Underwhelming
5 July 2021
A prime example of a "pretentious art flick". It may lead you to believe that the cinematography and production design is pretty, but the beauty quickly wears off as the visuals get pretty stale pretty fast, there is no innovation or memorable shots as the movie progresses. It takes a long time to develop its "chemistry" between the women but its very flat, mundane and devoid of any insights or dialogues. Its a ho hum trudge through someone's supposedly brilliant art school idea but the movie turns out to be a very big bore.
Vince Gilligan's show of (no)-talent
13 October 2019
Perfect way to make you realize the what the "team of writers" did on Breaking Bad compared to what Vince G can do when left alone without his foot soldiers to write a script. El Camino is so derivative, so boring and so overlong without coming to any satisfying conclusion, you are forced to think, "This guy wrote Breaking Bad??". This is a movie devoid of any new ideas and pretty much stretches your incredulity in executing sequences which have no basis in logic or reality. This is by-the-numbers plot plodding and so disappointing.
The Nightingale
(I) (2018)
Total Misfire
5 September 2019
If you have your hopes high that this new film from the unnervingly good Babadook's director will provide some revelatory revenge drama, then you are in for a big disappointment. This is firmly in the category of, "it seems great on paper" but it turned out to be really really bad.
The Nightingale has no originality of thought considering the themes that it portrays of the violent history of colonial conflicts with indigenous people and assorted immigrants has been done very well by other great movies already and done in a much refined and artistic way than this piece of fizzled hamfisted effort. The story and its execution is juvenile, the sexual violence handled unsophisticated, dialogues are derivative, the acting and directing a total failure in evoking emotions. Rather it all seems like a first effort from an untalented hack.
Very disappointing and laughably so.
The Nightingale has no originality of thought considering the themes that it portrays of the violent history of colonial conflicts with indigenous people and assorted immigrants has been done very well by other great movies already and done in a much refined and artistic way than this piece of fizzled hamfisted effort. The story and its execution is juvenile, the sexual violence handled unsophisticated, dialogues are derivative, the acting and directing a total failure in evoking emotions. Rather it all seems like a first effort from an untalented hack.
Very disappointing and laughably so.
Shoplifters
(2018)
Overrated
11 January 2019
An exercise in cheap shocks without anything holding together the disparate characters and their meandering arcs. This movie portrays a bunch of poor individuals living in the fringes of urban society and surviving by any means possible. Their relationships are suspect, there is some mystery in the proceedings as to their motivations or what drives them which never comes effectually in any of the slow burn sequences. It's just one mini episode after another, each one adding nothing to the feel or message of the movie. You don't care particularly for any one character since the focus shifts constantly from one to another without any cohesive thread holding it tight. The final half an hour is clumsily written and staged, the revelations cheapen the whole experience and feel engineered to evoke a response plus the movie's languid pace does not pay off at all in the end. Visuals are not arresting, it could be Tokyo or Thailand or China or wherever, there is nothing redeeming in this movie. It's shlock and shock and meandering and boring.
House of Cards
(2013–2018)
Bloated and devoid of substance
21 November 2018
If you are a huge fan of Frank Pugliese and looking forward to check this "critically acclaimed" series, please keep your expectations in check since you are probably going to be very dissapointed. A paper thin plot stretched over 6 excruciating episodes laden high and tall with stylistic oeuvre of shots( split screens, eerier moments, music and a laughably bad narrow screen framing for a later to be revealed pretentious reason) leading to such an underwhelming conclusion that you are left wondering why on Earth did you get misled by the rotten tomatoes score and led yourself to waste 5 hours of your life. Yeah it is that bad.
The characters are driven with no particular motivations, a central character( Underwood) seems just a poor copy and paste of his other character from British House of Cards. People have change of heart for no compelling reasons, White House is built to sound like the next Dharma Initiative from Lost but nothing is fleshed out. A unsatisfying non-mystery where you keep your eyes peeled for smart clues ( it's Spacey! Let me see the clock in the background it would mean something! These geometric patterns! Are we in DC or another reboot of West Wing?). The whole story could be made into a soporific 1 hour TV movie but what we have is this.
The characters are driven with no particular motivations, a central character( Underwood) seems just a poor copy and paste of his other character from British House of Cards. People have change of heart for no compelling reasons, White House is built to sound like the next Dharma Initiative from Lost but nothing is fleshed out. A unsatisfying non-mystery where you keep your eyes peeled for smart clues ( it's Spacey! Let me see the clock in the background it would mean something! These geometric patterns! Are we in DC or another reboot of West Wing?). The whole story could be made into a soporific 1 hour TV movie but what we have is this.
Sorry to Bother You
(2018)
Explosive satire!
15 July 2018
If you thought Get Out was the breakthrough innovative movie which surprised and shocked audiences with a heady mix of horror and genre bending social messaging, then Sorry to Bother You will blow your mind. This is such a meticulously crafted innovative and funny social satire that illuminates and illustrates how corporate greed, general apathy and institutionalized racism has affected the black community so hard. It is also a fiery comment on the state of our society in general. I wonder how this can fly over the head of folks rating his 1 and 2 stars or it is just denial at the sheer virtuosity of directorial control and pointed messaging at display here. This is a brutal tear down of what makes us human and it is not pretty. Anyone who is even slightly tuned to the general zeitgeist will absolutely know what the whole movie and the ending lays out. If you didn't understand it, there is a very high chance you are totally cut off from the world around you.
Game Night
(I) (2018)
More of the same manufactured comedy genre
21 March 2018
This is a good entertaining movie if you are looking for a few hours to kill. I wouldn't say its a "great" comedy movie. It's a notch below crowd favorite comedies such as 21 Jump Street or Horrible Bosses. It belongs more to the B level class of comedy movies such as Horrible Bosses 2 or Central Intelligence or Due Date or Hangover 2 etc. There is nothing ground breaking about the plot, some of the wise cracks are great but the mundane almost cliche to the point plot that you can actually foretell what's going to happen next puts a dampener on any comedic flourishes. The plot is really tired, basically a mishmash of The Game, Hangover and whatever the script writer wanted to throw at the wall. I went to see this movie because it had an above average rating on IMDB and for a comedy (or horror) it's tough to even get rated high so I thought it would be a somewhat higher quality affair. But it seems to me that the rating systems are somehow manipulated these days such that average movies such as Game Night garner much fanfare. Or is the the Moviepass crowd being more forgiving to such excursions?
Creed
(II) (2015)
A wholly unnecessary movie
5 December 2015
Why do we need to see a reasonably made rehash of the same successful formula, shot with a different camera at a different time which does not take the saga into newer territories nor ever takes risks with the material? This is a ho-hum plod through another reboot where the character's motivations are all muddled, the romance is all tacked on and unnecessary and the plot is mm thick, it never delves deeper into its suggested material, doesn't explore any angles or takes any chances. The only redeeming thing about this movie is the mildly interesting interaction between Stallone and Creed.
A good example is Tom Hardy's Warrior, which explores so much emotions and gives an emotional wallop, all of which is missing from this latest retake from Ryan Coogler.
This movie is a bore.
A good example is Tom Hardy's Warrior, which explores so much emotions and gives an emotional wallop, all of which is missing from this latest retake from Ryan Coogler.
This movie is a bore.
Interstellar
(2014)
Nolan does an Armageddon
7 November 2014
Warning: Spoilers
SPOILER FREE BEGINS *********
I had a sneaking feeling that Christopher Nolan was a director who wasn't particularly good at staging emotional sequences, nor had a special skill in staging action sequences nor has consistency in his screen writing which may range from mediocre (The Dark Knight Rises and overall logical setup of the Batman series) or sublime (Memento, Inception). What always worked for Nolan was that his movies were always interesting and always intriguing and if the script was any good, he made classics.
Interstellar represents a colossal failure of Nolan on every front imaginable. Let's start with the plot which is the most looked forward thing in his movies. The plot involving the World's end and the attempt to save it via Interstellar travel is so hokey that you may think you are watching a Michael Bay movie. If you could complain about "Gravity"s leaps of logic, then you will realize there is absolutely no physical logic in this script. The story is a Galaxy sized plot hole. The sad part is that it isn't even original which you would come to expect from the Nolan Brothers. It's a bad mishmash of Gravity, Coherence, 2001 a Space Odyssey and Contact book ended by a cringe inducing emotional thread that it will compel you to flay your hands in the air over the inept acting, dialogues, staging, and poor editing, story and what not. If you were expecting an "Inception" than don't, Interstellar has the most contrived sci- fi plot in existence coupled with bad acting. It's Armageddon with a sense of higher purpose. At least I enjoyed Armageddon.
SPOILER FREE ENDS ********
Now back to the plot points. Lets talk about the plot. The world is ending, and I could not fathom why, nor could Nolan show us the World in a broad sense apart from one single corn field farm in the middle of nowhere which conveniently houses an ultra secret project by NASA. If the world is ending, who will save it? Of course the "Aliens" or "They" (insert oooooooooooh). I thought the movie would involve humans discovering Interstellar travel.I never went into the movie thinking that a huge big ass Worm Hole was conveniently placed by 5- Dimensional unexplained aliens as a convenient plot device to jump into the whole space travel thingy. How hokey is that? And the hokum continues with supremely bad exposition ever committed on screen with fellow astronauts explaining how worm holes work ("Ah it's shaped like a sphere!) or how time dilation works in relativity theory. It seems like none of Johnathan or Christopher could truly grasp how these concepts should work in the context of the film and hence these appear as contrived elements in the service of producing cheap thrills ("oh we lost so many years").
And talking about cheap thrills, can anyone possibly out there condone how stupid the middle reveal was with our famous cameo from a famous actor? Okay let's talk about the ending. One can apparently fly into a black hole, make contact with 5-Dimensional entities who will present you a menu of quantum states of possibilities in order to save the world by how? How? By transmitting some mumbo-jumbo data via Morse Code through a ticking hand of a watch to a woman on the other side of the space time continuum so that she can umm fit it into the equation? or was it a constant? what is a 5 pager formula? How did it work? Hokey as hell.
And the visuals? Oh the problem is since Gravity came out and took the crown of the best space visuals in the last 5 years, what could Instellar do? Well lets have some obviously fake looking CGI dust clouds. Have your space ship fly over a Windows wallpaper of Saturn. How was any of it "Original"? Let's look at the planet. One has Water with a fake wall of waves, one has simply ice. That's it. Water and Ice. Where did you spend your money on Mr Nolan? Oh the Robots were hilarious but you would cringe in your seats thinking how a rectangular block of moving pillar was a good Robot Design and how the poor chap was managing to run on flat ground.
And the acting? Cringeworthy Mumblecore.
I don't think even the fanboys can save this one.
I had a sneaking feeling that Christopher Nolan was a director who wasn't particularly good at staging emotional sequences, nor had a special skill in staging action sequences nor has consistency in his screen writing which may range from mediocre (The Dark Knight Rises and overall logical setup of the Batman series) or sublime (Memento, Inception). What always worked for Nolan was that his movies were always interesting and always intriguing and if the script was any good, he made classics.
Interstellar represents a colossal failure of Nolan on every front imaginable. Let's start with the plot which is the most looked forward thing in his movies. The plot involving the World's end and the attempt to save it via Interstellar travel is so hokey that you may think you are watching a Michael Bay movie. If you could complain about "Gravity"s leaps of logic, then you will realize there is absolutely no physical logic in this script. The story is a Galaxy sized plot hole. The sad part is that it isn't even original which you would come to expect from the Nolan Brothers. It's a bad mishmash of Gravity, Coherence, 2001 a Space Odyssey and Contact book ended by a cringe inducing emotional thread that it will compel you to flay your hands in the air over the inept acting, dialogues, staging, and poor editing, story and what not. If you were expecting an "Inception" than don't, Interstellar has the most contrived sci- fi plot in existence coupled with bad acting. It's Armageddon with a sense of higher purpose. At least I enjoyed Armageddon.
SPOILER FREE ENDS ********
Now back to the plot points. Lets talk about the plot. The world is ending, and I could not fathom why, nor could Nolan show us the World in a broad sense apart from one single corn field farm in the middle of nowhere which conveniently houses an ultra secret project by NASA. If the world is ending, who will save it? Of course the "Aliens" or "They" (insert oooooooooooh). I thought the movie would involve humans discovering Interstellar travel.I never went into the movie thinking that a huge big ass Worm Hole was conveniently placed by 5- Dimensional unexplained aliens as a convenient plot device to jump into the whole space travel thingy. How hokey is that? And the hokum continues with supremely bad exposition ever committed on screen with fellow astronauts explaining how worm holes work ("Ah it's shaped like a sphere!) or how time dilation works in relativity theory. It seems like none of Johnathan or Christopher could truly grasp how these concepts should work in the context of the film and hence these appear as contrived elements in the service of producing cheap thrills ("oh we lost so many years").
And talking about cheap thrills, can anyone possibly out there condone how stupid the middle reveal was with our famous cameo from a famous actor? Okay let's talk about the ending. One can apparently fly into a black hole, make contact with 5-Dimensional entities who will present you a menu of quantum states of possibilities in order to save the world by how? How? By transmitting some mumbo-jumbo data via Morse Code through a ticking hand of a watch to a woman on the other side of the space time continuum so that she can umm fit it into the equation? or was it a constant? what is a 5 pager formula? How did it work? Hokey as hell.
And the visuals? Oh the problem is since Gravity came out and took the crown of the best space visuals in the last 5 years, what could Instellar do? Well lets have some obviously fake looking CGI dust clouds. Have your space ship fly over a Windows wallpaper of Saturn. How was any of it "Original"? Let's look at the planet. One has Water with a fake wall of waves, one has simply ice. That's it. Water and Ice. Where did you spend your money on Mr Nolan? Oh the Robots were hilarious but you would cringe in your seats thinking how a rectangular block of moving pillar was a good Robot Design and how the poor chap was managing to run on flat ground.
And the acting? Cringeworthy Mumblecore.
I don't think even the fanboys can save this one.
The Signal
(2014)
A movie as stupid as it thinks it is smart
4 August 2014
Warning: Spoilers
Very minor spoilers.
Take Dark City, remove any semblance of atmosphere or art design from it, dumb down the story to a three line pitch and put some bad teen actors in it and you will have The Signal. The Signal does not offer anything unique but does offer such an ill-written story that you will be left scratching your head wondering what on earth made you to waste an hour and a half of your life watching such trash.
Well it starts with a group of smart teenagers (from MIT of course, has to be MIT right? ) tracking a MIT server hacker (?) called Nomad as they make a detour to a place which leads to some strange incidents to occur. What is strange about the incident would be explained fairly quickly by Laurence Fishburne who pitches in with his laziest paycheck collecting performance ever. The MIT students are not that smart to avoid going into a Blair Witchesque house to explore things and one thing leads to another. Then things get really bizarre, uh well not so much. The screenwriter runs out of ideas as to what needs to be done to make the setting seem weird. Okay mmm why not throw in an extended interrogation sequence with the scowling teen lead in a hospital setting? Half an hour will be spent with the teen whimpering and crying and Fishburne smiling and jotting stuff on a notepad. No dramatic visuals, no imagery, no imagination whatsoever. This is followed by a lame ass attempt to escape from the mental institution to redneck Texas Chainsaw Massacre land. Also the protagonists have metal limbs for some reason and the girl in the group is being umm saved by the suspicious astro doctors for some future experimentation? This is followed by some really unnecessary and badly executed action sequence.
But the end is what will make you peel off your face. The way "Nomad" connection is revealed will make you question your sanity. The reason why they experimented with the leads with metal limbs is unexplained and so lame (why would they need to do it?) that you will want to be lobotomized rather than see another minute of this travesty.
I followed this movie with "Under the Skin". I can tell you that this was the worst movie watching day of my life. You have been warned.
Take Dark City, remove any semblance of atmosphere or art design from it, dumb down the story to a three line pitch and put some bad teen actors in it and you will have The Signal. The Signal does not offer anything unique but does offer such an ill-written story that you will be left scratching your head wondering what on earth made you to waste an hour and a half of your life watching such trash.
Well it starts with a group of smart teenagers (from MIT of course, has to be MIT right? ) tracking a MIT server hacker (?) called Nomad as they make a detour to a place which leads to some strange incidents to occur. What is strange about the incident would be explained fairly quickly by Laurence Fishburne who pitches in with his laziest paycheck collecting performance ever. The MIT students are not that smart to avoid going into a Blair Witchesque house to explore things and one thing leads to another. Then things get really bizarre, uh well not so much. The screenwriter runs out of ideas as to what needs to be done to make the setting seem weird. Okay mmm why not throw in an extended interrogation sequence with the scowling teen lead in a hospital setting? Half an hour will be spent with the teen whimpering and crying and Fishburne smiling and jotting stuff on a notepad. No dramatic visuals, no imagery, no imagination whatsoever. This is followed by a lame ass attempt to escape from the mental institution to redneck Texas Chainsaw Massacre land. Also the protagonists have metal limbs for some reason and the girl in the group is being umm saved by the suspicious astro doctors for some future experimentation? This is followed by some really unnecessary and badly executed action sequence.
But the end is what will make you peel off your face. The way "Nomad" connection is revealed will make you question your sanity. The reason why they experimented with the leads with metal limbs is unexplained and so lame (why would they need to do it?) that you will want to be lobotomized rather than see another minute of this travesty.
I followed this movie with "Under the Skin". I can tell you that this was the worst movie watching day of my life. You have been warned.
Gravity
(2013)
Great Visuals, Weak Script overall
4 October 2013
Warning: Spoilers
Visually, Gravity is unlike what we have seen on a cinema screen before and arguably it has one of the best uses of 3D in a movie. The setting is spectacular and the premise is inventive.
On every other front,the movie falters badly. Once you get over the initial wonderment surrounding the beautiful visuals, the chinks start showing up. Overall the script is very weak. Apparently the Russians bomb their own satellite by mistake and the debris is flying around at bullet speed, smashing everything in its way. Now upon hearing an emergency evacuation request, Kowalski (who has been wasting his precious thrusters all this while, floating around, spouting inane dialogs) orders Ryan (Bullock) to disengage from whatever she is repairing. Apparently Ryan has six months of training (only) and fails to be responsive and then the trouble starts.
We come to know that Ryan has some head issues surrounding the death of her daughter as the writer felt a dire need to give Ryan some sort of existential problem in her head to make her character feel more human. Apart from this minor bit, nothing is presented in terms of character development for any other protagonists. Who is Kowalski? Who are the people who died in their space pods? No idea.
Then the whole manufactured sense of suspense. Every time Ryan gets anywhere near the Air Lock (she does it three times), the debris presents itself like on cue every single time. Then a fire in a space station, then running out of Oxygen, then something then something. It's fine that they used some standard tricks but it all seems so manufactured and mechanical by the numbers suspense.
Also at times I couldn't shrug off the feeling that what they are showing on screen is not actually factual. Do the controls on various international space stations have their national languages on them? Really? Maybe they do but seems hard to believe when 20$ phones are built with custom User interfaces with changeable languages, why have your billion dollar space stations with Russian or Chinese characters on your buttons totally beats me. Oh manufactured suspense owing to the whole can't-understand-this-thing machinery.
The the dialogs when they come are nothing to write home about. Ryan has a hallucinatory moment when she talks to herself following some Mandarin Chatter on the radio which is cringe worthy. I wont even mention the in-your-face allegory about rebirth which is there for to make the movie seem deeper than it is.
So what works for the movie? It's a cross between an IMAX documentary with some suspense elements thrown it which makes it look path breaking.
But it's not. Not a bad watch but nothing to rave about either.
On every other front,the movie falters badly. Once you get over the initial wonderment surrounding the beautiful visuals, the chinks start showing up. Overall the script is very weak. Apparently the Russians bomb their own satellite by mistake and the debris is flying around at bullet speed, smashing everything in its way. Now upon hearing an emergency evacuation request, Kowalski (who has been wasting his precious thrusters all this while, floating around, spouting inane dialogs) orders Ryan (Bullock) to disengage from whatever she is repairing. Apparently Ryan has six months of training (only) and fails to be responsive and then the trouble starts.
We come to know that Ryan has some head issues surrounding the death of her daughter as the writer felt a dire need to give Ryan some sort of existential problem in her head to make her character feel more human. Apart from this minor bit, nothing is presented in terms of character development for any other protagonists. Who is Kowalski? Who are the people who died in their space pods? No idea.
Then the whole manufactured sense of suspense. Every time Ryan gets anywhere near the Air Lock (she does it three times), the debris presents itself like on cue every single time. Then a fire in a space station, then running out of Oxygen, then something then something. It's fine that they used some standard tricks but it all seems so manufactured and mechanical by the numbers suspense.
Also at times I couldn't shrug off the feeling that what they are showing on screen is not actually factual. Do the controls on various international space stations have their national languages on them? Really? Maybe they do but seems hard to believe when 20$ phones are built with custom User interfaces with changeable languages, why have your billion dollar space stations with Russian or Chinese characters on your buttons totally beats me. Oh manufactured suspense owing to the whole can't-understand-this-thing machinery.
The the dialogs when they come are nothing to write home about. Ryan has a hallucinatory moment when she talks to herself following some Mandarin Chatter on the radio which is cringe worthy. I wont even mention the in-your-face allegory about rebirth which is there for to make the movie seem deeper than it is.
So what works for the movie? It's a cross between an IMAX documentary with some suspense elements thrown it which makes it look path breaking.
But it's not. Not a bad watch but nothing to rave about either.
Safety Not Guaranteed
(2012)
A movie from a team of Hacks
9 July 2013
Warning: Spoilers
This is not a movie and I am hard to find words to review a "movie" which completely resembles something that a first year film student would put up as a test assignment. Wait, even that would be better than this effort put by a team of hacks which have absolutely no clue how to write anything original. The fact that this has over 90% rating on rotten tomatoes simply proves that even the critics have their blinders on when faced with any kind of cinema tooting anything unconventional.
This movie is anything but overtly conventional and simply badly done in all departments be it acting, script writing, directing or comedy. Stock characters? One geeky Indian who by very virtue of being studious is uncool - Check, A girl with a hole in her soul - Check, A weirdo guy Check, A dude Check. Now that we have assembled our unique set of characters lets proceed.
The first 30 minutes of the movie would rest any doubts that this is no Sci-fi flick as it attempts to be a kind of hipster-cutesy road movie with terrible writing. Not one joke is funny or is delivered right. The film meanders while setting up characters who are cardboard or worse thoroughly unlikable. There is a side story about the Jake Johnson playing "Jeff" and a blonde which has absolutely no relevance and has no bearing on the story as a whole. He comes to find her and talks to her, sleeps with her and leaves. What happens to them next, god knows. Sloppy writing.
Then everything turns into a mysterious quest. What is Kenneths purpose? Who is he and is the time travel thing real? We constantly ask ourselves while we are subjected to a numerous cutesy scenes of learning shooting, or robbing a medical center (laughably staged like it's a pilot for a really shitty TV show) or sharing some heartfelt and silly reasons to travel back in time or kissing each other in front of the bonfire (wow).
In the last 20 minutes the movie not only falls flat on its face but instead begins to dig a deep hole into the earth making its way to the Earths core with its lameness.
Two agents pop up from somewhere which leds Darius to coo "Oh my god oh my god, this is REAL!!". When she actually gets to talk to them here is the lame hack explanation that the Agents give to her "We have been investigating him for two years (2 years!!), he constantly talks about the "accelerator at Berkeley". Okay. Did a kindergarten kid write that line? Following on when asked if they are sure that Kenneth stole the lasers from the medical compound, they say," Well.. we are positive". Hello? This guy walked out with 5 boxes worth of goods in front of 20 people in slow motion and you are in doubt? Who wrote this stinking piece of juvenile script? You are investigating him for 2 years and couldn't break into his creaky barn to see his instruments? This is what I am spending my 10 bucks on to see in a theater? The funny part is that this is not a spoof, this is real.
Upon informing Kenneth that his dead girl friend is actually alive, he just wonders for a moment and then shrugs it off and runs away. What does it mean for his character? Upon knowing that Darius is part of the Magazine group and has betrayed him, he also totally doesn't mind this fact at all and just coolly invites her over to his time travel boat.
Oh yeah a time travel boat with a car's rear view mirror attached to give out a lens flare which looks futuristic given the low budget the movie is working out of. Wow. Totally believable.
The last 4 minutes has everybody running through the woods with the Agents following last. There is no sense of urgency or mystery. We were already shown the actual barn where Kenneth planned his machine. It had doodles drawn by 5 year olds on the wall, the lamest engineering plan ever to be committed on celluloid. Its hard not to let out a guffaw when you actually closely look at what are the diagrams.
What a turd of a movie. Want to see a really good low budget concept movie? See Another Earth.
This movie is anything but overtly conventional and simply badly done in all departments be it acting, script writing, directing or comedy. Stock characters? One geeky Indian who by very virtue of being studious is uncool - Check, A girl with a hole in her soul - Check, A weirdo guy Check, A dude Check. Now that we have assembled our unique set of characters lets proceed.
The first 30 minutes of the movie would rest any doubts that this is no Sci-fi flick as it attempts to be a kind of hipster-cutesy road movie with terrible writing. Not one joke is funny or is delivered right. The film meanders while setting up characters who are cardboard or worse thoroughly unlikable. There is a side story about the Jake Johnson playing "Jeff" and a blonde which has absolutely no relevance and has no bearing on the story as a whole. He comes to find her and talks to her, sleeps with her and leaves. What happens to them next, god knows. Sloppy writing.
Then everything turns into a mysterious quest. What is Kenneths purpose? Who is he and is the time travel thing real? We constantly ask ourselves while we are subjected to a numerous cutesy scenes of learning shooting, or robbing a medical center (laughably staged like it's a pilot for a really shitty TV show) or sharing some heartfelt and silly reasons to travel back in time or kissing each other in front of the bonfire (wow).
In the last 20 minutes the movie not only falls flat on its face but instead begins to dig a deep hole into the earth making its way to the Earths core with its lameness.
Two agents pop up from somewhere which leds Darius to coo "Oh my god oh my god, this is REAL!!". When she actually gets to talk to them here is the lame hack explanation that the Agents give to her "We have been investigating him for two years (2 years!!), he constantly talks about the "accelerator at Berkeley". Okay. Did a kindergarten kid write that line? Following on when asked if they are sure that Kenneth stole the lasers from the medical compound, they say," Well.. we are positive". Hello? This guy walked out with 5 boxes worth of goods in front of 20 people in slow motion and you are in doubt? Who wrote this stinking piece of juvenile script? You are investigating him for 2 years and couldn't break into his creaky barn to see his instruments? This is what I am spending my 10 bucks on to see in a theater? The funny part is that this is not a spoof, this is real.
Upon informing Kenneth that his dead girl friend is actually alive, he just wonders for a moment and then shrugs it off and runs away. What does it mean for his character? Upon knowing that Darius is part of the Magazine group and has betrayed him, he also totally doesn't mind this fact at all and just coolly invites her over to his time travel boat.
Oh yeah a time travel boat with a car's rear view mirror attached to give out a lens flare which looks futuristic given the low budget the movie is working out of. Wow. Totally believable.
The last 4 minutes has everybody running through the woods with the Agents following last. There is no sense of urgency or mystery. We were already shown the actual barn where Kenneth planned his machine. It had doodles drawn by 5 year olds on the wall, the lamest engineering plan ever to be committed on celluloid. Its hard not to let out a guffaw when you actually closely look at what are the diagrams.
What a turd of a movie. Want to see a really good low budget concept movie? See Another Earth.
Before Midnight
(2013)
Coming from a huge fan of the first two: This movie is a Disaster!
7 June 2013
I never thought I would say this. I am a huge fan of the first two movies and consider them to be one of the finest romances ever conceived and executed on the big screen. The third installment in the series destroys everything that you loved and cared about the two most fascinating and enchanting characters that were painstakingly built on a refreshing premise of two normal people exploring a world of stuff over a string of conversations over exotic locations.
The Celine and Jesse you came to grow so close are nowhere to be seen here. Its appalling to see how poorly written these characters are this time around. The 9 years since the last movie seems to have ripped the soul out of these two beloved characters reducing them to a bickering, bitter and neurotic dime-a-dozen couple. The topic of most discussions are so bizarre that it appears a bunch of 18 year olds were forced to write a script from a perspective of 40 somethings. And why would they choose to mould these two in this fashion? What happened to the slightly larger than life motivations of these characters, that spirit, that aura that they had? Jesse and Celine were always special people. There is nothing special about the dried and drained personas that are on show here this time. There is absolutely no romance, no mystery, no nothing.
And yeah the music sucks. One of the interesting things in Greece is a dog and a bunch of goats. The whole setup has a forced feeling.
As I walked out of the screening I realized I didn't care anymore whether they will make a new installment. Jesse and Celine are forever lost to the realm of banality and mediocrity.
What have you done Mr Linklater?
The Celine and Jesse you came to grow so close are nowhere to be seen here. Its appalling to see how poorly written these characters are this time around. The 9 years since the last movie seems to have ripped the soul out of these two beloved characters reducing them to a bickering, bitter and neurotic dime-a-dozen couple. The topic of most discussions are so bizarre that it appears a bunch of 18 year olds were forced to write a script from a perspective of 40 somethings. And why would they choose to mould these two in this fashion? What happened to the slightly larger than life motivations of these characters, that spirit, that aura that they had? Jesse and Celine were always special people. There is nothing special about the dried and drained personas that are on show here this time. There is absolutely no romance, no mystery, no nothing.
And yeah the music sucks. One of the interesting things in Greece is a dog and a bunch of goats. The whole setup has a forced feeling.
As I walked out of the screening I realized I didn't care anymore whether they will make a new installment. Jesse and Celine are forever lost to the realm of banality and mediocrity.
What have you done Mr Linklater?
The Lives of Others
(2006)
Prime example of an Overrated Movie
7 April 2013
After watching the movie last night, I just couldn't fathom the reason why this movie is so venerated and awarded. At best its a passable account of life in the GDR serviced by a fairly decent script ruined by insipid and lifeless direction. Oh actually the script is also nothing home to write about.
First the movie has absolutely no atmosphere whatsoever and each frame looks like it could be anywhere in Europe in the 50s, 60s or 2000s. Is the Stasi something to be feared? Yes we know that already but the movie never attempts to make you feel scared, or feel claustrophobic or paranoid of the environment in which everything you see or do is under the watch of some Big Brother. A key plot point of the movie brings in a comparison with Hungary. I happened to visit the the Hungarian equivalent of the Hohenschönhausen in Budapest and it made me quake in my boots when I saw the prisons there. The movie steers clear of any 'fearful' portrayal of the Stasi.
Coming to the acting, Sebastian Koch as Dreyman maintains a one-note expression throughout the movie. You could never tell from his crinkly half grinning half squinting expression whether he's tense or happy or scared or what. As a result you never come to care about the predicaments of the central character. There are a couple of good performances by Ulrich Mühe as Weisler and Thomas Thieme as Minister Hempf but thats all there is to it.
I couldn't really point out whether there was something wrong with the Script or the Direction in the end but ultimately it looks like it's a bit of both. A central character has a change of heart which is abrupt and I could never really point out why it occurred, considering how the initial introduction of the character was laid out. The last 10 minutes of the movie borders on the ridiculous when it spends undue amount of time to 'explain' everything that happened (or maybe Dreyman WAS stupid).
All in all the movie was decent but nothing to be wowed over. When I learned that the Director of the movie also directed 'The Tourist' I was not in the least bit surprised.
First the movie has absolutely no atmosphere whatsoever and each frame looks like it could be anywhere in Europe in the 50s, 60s or 2000s. Is the Stasi something to be feared? Yes we know that already but the movie never attempts to make you feel scared, or feel claustrophobic or paranoid of the environment in which everything you see or do is under the watch of some Big Brother. A key plot point of the movie brings in a comparison with Hungary. I happened to visit the the Hungarian equivalent of the Hohenschönhausen in Budapest and it made me quake in my boots when I saw the prisons there. The movie steers clear of any 'fearful' portrayal of the Stasi.
Coming to the acting, Sebastian Koch as Dreyman maintains a one-note expression throughout the movie. You could never tell from his crinkly half grinning half squinting expression whether he's tense or happy or scared or what. As a result you never come to care about the predicaments of the central character. There are a couple of good performances by Ulrich Mühe as Weisler and Thomas Thieme as Minister Hempf but thats all there is to it.
I couldn't really point out whether there was something wrong with the Script or the Direction in the end but ultimately it looks like it's a bit of both. A central character has a change of heart which is abrupt and I could never really point out why it occurred, considering how the initial introduction of the character was laid out. The last 10 minutes of the movie borders on the ridiculous when it spends undue amount of time to 'explain' everything that happened (or maybe Dreyman WAS stupid).
All in all the movie was decent but nothing to be wowed over. When I learned that the Director of the movie also directed 'The Tourist' I was not in the least bit surprised.
No One Killed Jessica
(2011)
Could have been much much better
10 January 2011
The movie Didn't work for me. Nada.
If the movie is nearly good, the industry tends to heap praises on it too quickly. It seems like we thank our stars every time someone like Raaj Kumar Gupta makes a "nearly" good enough movie because in the day and age of Tees Maar Khan, we really feel fortunate to have something good at least in the theater to chew upon.
Nearly good is not enough, it has to be right there. It should be laden with electrifying performances, it should be well researched and well acted by all the cast, not the known 5 of the few actors. There are as my missteps in the movie as great ones.
Things not quite great about the movie: 1. The first half of the movie is okay. Its great in some patches, especially after the shooting leading up to the courtroom drama, with everyone pitching in with pitch perfect performances. For me, the hapless cop stole the show. 2. The setup in the beginning was tending to veer very close to Bhandarkar category in its cheesiness of execution. Very ordinary. 3. The tone of the movie was just like "Damini". Everyone kept shouting. I walked into the theater expecting a lil subtlety but it was a completely different movie. Which brings me to the fourth point. 4. It was irritating to see how the movie was playing to the gallery. The premise was power packed in itself. What was the need to execute the movie in this fashion? In fact there was a surdar ji joke too in "Justice for, justice for" which was a new low to stoop to bring in humor. Cringe worthy. 5. I don't know how much did Vidya Balan channeled the actual Sabrina Lall in her acting, but the result was tolerable for the first half and totally irritating, dragging and a bore in the second. In fact it was ham-territory. I saw the actual Sabrina on youtube and she doesn't seem nearly the same. 6. Where is the closure? The only fact that I didn't remember about the case was the sequence of events and court trial after the "fastrack". How did they re-prove the crime? It was all about making hero of Rani a.k.a Aamir in Taare Zamin Par, rather than providing an intelligent closure to the proceedings.
So no, for it to get 4/5 stars in the media, it better be a classic. Otherwise its run of the mill stuff.
If the movie is nearly good, the industry tends to heap praises on it too quickly. It seems like we thank our stars every time someone like Raaj Kumar Gupta makes a "nearly" good enough movie because in the day and age of Tees Maar Khan, we really feel fortunate to have something good at least in the theater to chew upon.
Nearly good is not enough, it has to be right there. It should be laden with electrifying performances, it should be well researched and well acted by all the cast, not the known 5 of the few actors. There are as my missteps in the movie as great ones.
Things not quite great about the movie: 1. The first half of the movie is okay. Its great in some patches, especially after the shooting leading up to the courtroom drama, with everyone pitching in with pitch perfect performances. For me, the hapless cop stole the show. 2. The setup in the beginning was tending to veer very close to Bhandarkar category in its cheesiness of execution. Very ordinary. 3. The tone of the movie was just like "Damini". Everyone kept shouting. I walked into the theater expecting a lil subtlety but it was a completely different movie. Which brings me to the fourth point. 4. It was irritating to see how the movie was playing to the gallery. The premise was power packed in itself. What was the need to execute the movie in this fashion? In fact there was a surdar ji joke too in "Justice for, justice for" which was a new low to stoop to bring in humor. Cringe worthy. 5. I don't know how much did Vidya Balan channeled the actual Sabrina Lall in her acting, but the result was tolerable for the first half and totally irritating, dragging and a bore in the second. In fact it was ham-territory. I saw the actual Sabrina on youtube and she doesn't seem nearly the same. 6. Where is the closure? The only fact that I didn't remember about the case was the sequence of events and court trial after the "fastrack". How did they re-prove the crime? It was all about making hero of Rani a.k.a Aamir in Taare Zamin Par, rather than providing an intelligent closure to the proceedings.
So no, for it to get 4/5 stars in the media, it better be a classic. Otherwise its run of the mill stuff.
Saawariya
(2007)
Why is this movie so underrated? Absolutely brilliant Cinema
11 December 2010
The fact that Saawariya was not taken well by the Indian masses simply shows that Sanjay Leela Bhansali is light years ahead of what the demands and understanding of quality cinema is in Bollywood. SLB should be making European dramas, not catering to an audience who has no capability of appreciating and respecting art.
Saawariya is a triumph in every aspect of film making. It is the most breathtaking cinematography and art direction put on an Indian screen, the most visually striking of all movies, laden with electrifying performances from the cast, heart breaking dialogs and a soulful musical score. The perfect Anti-Romance of our generation.
Simply fantastic and a must watch.
Saawariya is a triumph in every aspect of film making. It is the most breathtaking cinematography and art direction put on an Indian screen, the most visually striking of all movies, laden with electrifying performances from the cast, heart breaking dialogs and a soulful musical score. The perfect Anti-Romance of our generation.
Simply fantastic and a must watch.
Devil
(2010)
Ignore the Bad Press - This movie is pretty good!
8 November 2010
I know this was "from the mind of Manoj Night Shyamalan" and it was riding on a wave of pretty bad press, but strangely enough, I found the movie to be pretty good.
This movie delivered what it promised, a solid taut thriller which can keep one on the edge of the seat for the optimum 1 hour and 20 minutes of running time. The acting was surprisingly consistent and good throughout by all the actors involved (tough for a low budgeter to achieve), the screenplay didn't indulge in unnecessary Boo moments to propel things forward, the script was solid and everything tied up well at the end.
I mean cmon critics, for once please give Shyamalan a break! Far better return on my money than the steaming goo pile called the "Due Date".
This movie delivered what it promised, a solid taut thriller which can keep one on the edge of the seat for the optimum 1 hour and 20 minutes of running time. The acting was surprisingly consistent and good throughout by all the actors involved (tough for a low budgeter to achieve), the screenplay didn't indulge in unnecessary Boo moments to propel things forward, the script was solid and everything tied up well at the end.
I mean cmon critics, for once please give Shyamalan a break! Far better return on my money than the steaming goo pile called the "Due Date".
Udaan
(2010)
Utterly Overrated
18 July 2010
Well I had the pleasure of wasting my hard earned money on this one after hearing some great reviews and having a great Saturday night watching Inception. But it was not to be. There are many problems with this movie.
1. Its a breathtaking, awe inspiring, extremely well made movie about..well nothing! 2. I accept that Bollywood lacks a certain realism in the movies that it produces currently, but not all well made "arty", "realistic" movies have to be good. Udaan is by no means bad, but well its inconsequential. Look at LSD, thats a great movie. 3. No movie made by Bollywood does justice to the actual college life on ground, this one adds to the examples to boost my theory. The sequences involving the protagonist with his College friends is one of the most ill scripted and yawn inducing.
A waste of money in my book. Don't fall for the hype!
1. Its a breathtaking, awe inspiring, extremely well made movie about..well nothing! 2. I accept that Bollywood lacks a certain realism in the movies that it produces currently, but not all well made "arty", "realistic" movies have to be good. Udaan is by no means bad, but well its inconsequential. Look at LSD, thats a great movie. 3. No movie made by Bollywood does justice to the actual college life on ground, this one adds to the examples to boost my theory. The sequences involving the protagonist with his College friends is one of the most ill scripted and yawn inducing.
A waste of money in my book. Don't fall for the hype!
Iron Man 2
(2010)
Tedious and Irritating
8 May 2010
I would not say that I had very high hopes riding on this one when I entered the theater, but i was looking for a fun movie to watch on a Friday night. But it was not to be and I walked out of the theater tired, irritated and drained out to the core.
The first Ironman was a pretty picture: concise, great build up and action and clear humorous dialogs. Ironman 2 is a mess and looking from the current reviews and rating, a highly overrated one too. Things which did not work for me:
1. Such absolutely brain numbing chatter between the characters! Was there any script for the lines? 2. Poor characterization, poor chemistry between the leads 3. Poor production quality: Yes! poor! Scarlett's fight sequence in the building was one of the most laughably staged ones in recent memory 4. Absence of a compelling plot: Well i do not expect every movie to be the Dark Knight, but hey at least you can put a semblance of a non- derivative plot?
Mind numbing junk
The first Ironman was a pretty picture: concise, great build up and action and clear humorous dialogs. Ironman 2 is a mess and looking from the current reviews and rating, a highly overrated one too. Things which did not work for me:
1. Such absolutely brain numbing chatter between the characters! Was there any script for the lines? 2. Poor characterization, poor chemistry between the leads 3. Poor production quality: Yes! poor! Scarlett's fight sequence in the building was one of the most laughably staged ones in recent memory 4. Absence of a compelling plot: Well i do not expect every movie to be the Dark Knight, but hey at least you can put a semblance of a non- derivative plot?
Mind numbing junk
Karthik Calling Karthik
(2010)
Doesn't fulfill the promises made
26 February 2010
Plainly speaking, the movie promises a lot but delivers little. The first half of the movie is "wannabe" and blandly predictable. The second half is a trifle interesting but after spending 5 min on the on screen developments, one can easily guess whats coming next. This, in my opinion, is not a hallmark of a great thriller movie.
This movie looked like it could be one of those East Asian Techno Horror but it wasn't to be. There is nothing terribly wrong with the script, only that Vijay Lalwani did not have the talent to execute it. Just because you can shoot scenes using Hollywoodish flourishes and try "not" to direct a film like typical Bollywood stuff "doesnt" mean that it will turn out to be truly great. It needs talent.
This movie looked like it could be one of those East Asian Techno Horror but it wasn't to be. There is nothing terribly wrong with the script, only that Vijay Lalwani did not have the talent to execute it. Just because you can shoot scenes using Hollywoodish flourishes and try "not" to direct a film like typical Bollywood stuff "doesnt" mean that it will turn out to be truly great. It needs talent.
Paanch
(2003)
Great debut albeit with some jaded portions (circa 2010)
16 February 2010
Paanch has been one of the movie unicorns in the Hindi movie industry; always lurking near a release but never quite getting there, thus assuming a mythical cultist aura. How I came to watch it, I will be quiet about.
Paanch is an effective thriller overall and even compared to todays standards (which isn't much to compare to anyway), its radical. It almost reminded me of the Coens in the way it handles its suspenseful scenes, Tarantino in its sudden outburst of extreme violence, it has a lynchian tone to its suffocating nightmarish locales and features such a powerhouse performance from Kay Kay Menon that simply blows you away.
The movie had a laughably idiotic prologue and epilogue text (put in by the censors according to Kashyap) which warns you not to take the glorification of violence too seriously and I could sense how different this movie would have turned out if Kashyap had the creative freedom to do what he wished. Still I could see why it ran into censorship troubles in before 2003 with its frank depiction of drug use, on screen masturbation, expletives, extreme violence and the general amorality that the characters naturally embrace out of the demands of their stifling self loathing environment.
There are portions of the movie that haven't aged as well, for e.g. the actors don't really pass on as rock stars and the on stage performances are a bit funny. Then there's an atrocious signature song in the end. If its released in its present state today, I really don't think it will make a mark on the box office. It needs a bit of a revision and re shoots, a bit of technical polishing and plugging some holes in the script and then I think it can prove to be a strong contender for a release.
Or what the heck, remake it!
Paanch is an effective thriller overall and even compared to todays standards (which isn't much to compare to anyway), its radical. It almost reminded me of the Coens in the way it handles its suspenseful scenes, Tarantino in its sudden outburst of extreme violence, it has a lynchian tone to its suffocating nightmarish locales and features such a powerhouse performance from Kay Kay Menon that simply blows you away.
The movie had a laughably idiotic prologue and epilogue text (put in by the censors according to Kashyap) which warns you not to take the glorification of violence too seriously and I could sense how different this movie would have turned out if Kashyap had the creative freedom to do what he wished. Still I could see why it ran into censorship troubles in before 2003 with its frank depiction of drug use, on screen masturbation, expletives, extreme violence and the general amorality that the characters naturally embrace out of the demands of their stifling self loathing environment.
There are portions of the movie that haven't aged as well, for e.g. the actors don't really pass on as rock stars and the on stage performances are a bit funny. Then there's an atrocious signature song in the end. If its released in its present state today, I really don't think it will make a mark on the box office. It needs a bit of a revision and re shoots, a bit of technical polishing and plugging some holes in the script and then I think it can prove to be a strong contender for a release.
Or what the heck, remake it!
Delhi-6
(2009)
The pinnacle of crappiness
20 February 2009
I always had a fleeting suspicion of Rang De Basanti being an act of fate for the director Omprakash Mehra. A divine intervention that brought fame and adulation and sky high expectations for his movies. Mehra was deemed to be the rising star of modern Bollywood Cinema.
Hence I went into Delhi-6 with expectations soaring like Masakalli-the white kabootar. The rest of the movie experience can be compared to a burning fighter jet that is destined to crash into the ground. My jet caught fire as soon as the reels started and continued plummeting to its violent end. When I came out of the theater, I chuckled because I felt I had been robbed out of my precious money by a sinister conman. I had not watched a movie but an inexplicably put together random, boring shots of Delhi, sprinkled with a trippy doped out storyline about a Kalaa Bandar. All the outstanding songs in the movie have been massacred with sound cuts and outrageously poor and dumb filming.
This movie should have been more appropriately named "The Kalaa Bandar Chronicles".
aaarghh
Hence I went into Delhi-6 with expectations soaring like Masakalli-the white kabootar. The rest of the movie experience can be compared to a burning fighter jet that is destined to crash into the ground. My jet caught fire as soon as the reels started and continued plummeting to its violent end. When I came out of the theater, I chuckled because I felt I had been robbed out of my precious money by a sinister conman. I had not watched a movie but an inexplicably put together random, boring shots of Delhi, sprinkled with a trippy doped out storyline about a Kalaa Bandar. All the outstanding songs in the movie have been massacred with sound cuts and outrageously poor and dumb filming.
This movie should have been more appropriately named "The Kalaa Bandar Chronicles".
aaarghh
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