vze3vhtf Reviews

It's a Mad Mad Mad Mad World (1963)

What Might Might Might Might Have Been...

[4/10 · 2 April 2017]

I just watched this movie in its uninterrupted entirety (intermissions and all) for the first time. Just in case I missed any actual laughs in all my previous viewings, because I always thought this movie was nothing but an overproduced, overblown, overly loud, excuse to pack together as many comedians as possible.

Yet, sadly, even under the best conditions, there were still no actual laughs, because this movie is sadly still nothing but an overproduced, overblown, overly loud, excuse to pack together as many comedians as possible.

However, when I saw Ethel Merman, I was reminded of another role of hers, in ' Airplane '. The difference is, unlike this movie, that part was only 30 seconds long, and also unlike this movie, that part was absolutely hysterical!

And so it occurred to me that had Kramer & company had the foresight to anticipate more from the Zucker-Abrahams-Zucker playbook of understated deadpan comedy (Which they only hinted at here with the sweet & subtle cameo by the Three Stooges), then this would have been MUCH different, and MUCH funnier, movie.

-Oh, What Might Have Been!

But as it is, this mess deserves no more than 4/10, and even that 4 is only because of the impressive pre-CGI stunt work.

Otherwise, it's pretty much just a sad waste, of all that talent, and of 3 hours...

Sorority Boys (2002)

One of the Most UNDERRATED Comedies Ever!!!

[8/10 · 18 April 2016]

Some movies live up to their hype, some do not, & some are actually better than expected.

'S.B.'s ' falls into the last category.

The title alone should make it clear this is not ' Citizen Kane '.

Yet it is a worthy successor to ' Animal House ', which is fitting, as the cast includes several ' A.H. ' alumni, in cameo roles.

This film is well-written, directed, and acted-

-And most importantly, it is really F---ing Funny!!!

(There are some great lines, such as, " ...My Name is Roberta, & I'm Addicted to Porn, and I Masturbate Constantly! ")

I honestly cannot understand why other inferior raunchy comedies (' Bridesmaids ', Etc.), are actually rated higher.

That's a mystery, and also an injustice. This movie is far more worth your time! :-)

M

Star Wars: Episode VII - The Force Awakens (2015)

Flash VS Substance...

[5/10 · 27 December 2015]

Possible Spoilers:

I am a big SW fan, & I don't like to be ' Scrooge ' at Xmas Time.

BUT-I have to say I am disappointed with ' SW: TFA '.

-Why? Here is My List of Problems with Plot/Script:

If the Empire was gone for all those years, then how were they able to reconstitute, AND construct a Giant Planet Killing Machine???

This means that things are now essentially right back to where they were at the start of, " A New Hope ", and so the plot of Ep 7 is basically just a re-working of Ep 4!

No clear explanation as to why Rey is so strong with The Force?

No clear explanation why Luke is the ONLY surviving Jedi, when he had all those years train others (Unless we are to assume that Ren killed them all, but that is not clear either)?

No clear explanation why Ren was seduced to the Dark Side in the first place?

No clear explanation of who ' Snoke ' is, or how he came to power?

The cameos of the original cast were handled too awkwardly, with all the subtlety & finesse of a hit in the head with a 2x4.

The bad guy took off his mask way too soon; IF he is the Bad Guy, then you don't want to ' humanize ' him, by seeing his face!

It was too obvious that Han Solo was going to die in his confrontation with Ren.

These are just what I have noticed so far...

Sorry if this is a " Ba-Humbug ", but I think we fans deserved better.

M

Pompeii (I) (2014)

" ...Are You Not Entertained??? " Well, Yes, I Am...

[6/10 · 14 December 2015]

Pompeii is a ' Star-Crossed-Lovers-Romance/Disaster-Film ', with lots of clichés, little originality, and of course it borrows from other films, especially " Gladiator ", and, " 300 ".

The story is pretty much predictable.

The acting is pretty much wooden.

The dialogue is pretty much " Steve Reeves Hercules " quality.

BUT-The CGI effects are still good, the action sequences still fun, and Emily Browning and Jessica Lucas are still hot!

So it's STILL a pretty good way to kill a lazy rainy afternoon.

So There...

M

Hall Pass (2011)

More Proof That Saturday Night Live Is...Dead

[3/10 · 15 September 2015]

The once great SNL has not been funny for over a decade now.

In 2011 we saw the release of ' Bridesmaids ', a nominal comedy, with SNL cast members.

But like the current SNL, that film was NOT funny.

And also in 2011 came, ' Hall Pass ', another nominal comedy, with more SNL cast members.

But again, like the current SNL, this film is NOT funny, either.

And watching Jason Sudeikis simulating oral sex on a woman via using hand movements and noises, is truly cringe-worthy.

If there was any doubt before, then this should be the final nail in the coffin holding SNL's rotting corpse.

Lorne Michaels should just give up the illusion that keeping the show on Life Support is fooling anyone, & just pull the plug altogether-And the Farrelly Brothers should omit this film from their resumes.

I weep for what SNL used to be, & I am truly in agony over what it is now. We long time fans deserve far better than this.

M

Cool World (1992)

Bad Art + No Story = Unwatchable Mess

[1/10 · 7 July 2015]

When you're a fan of animation like I am, you can understand that not everyone digs watching cartoons.

But when you are subjected to a movie like this-and let's pray there won't EVER be another-that is just so painfully terrible on every level: Script, Acting, Graphics, Etc., you start thinking of Bakshi as a Thief, for stealing two hours of your life that you can never get back!

With a reported budget of $30 Mil (About $50 Mil in today's money), it is my understanding that ' C.W. ' had the biggest budget of any Backshi film. Well, it still did not help much...

The Plot: Now Try & Stay With Me Here-

A young Marine returning from WW2 dresses up in his nicest suit to take his mother out for a ride on his motorcycle, but gets run into, causing HER to die, & HIM to be...Transported into a Cartoon World???

Fast-forward to present day (1992), where an artist has been released from prison after serving his sentence for killing someone, & he is... also transported into this same cartoon world???

And so these two REAL guys end up in the same place, trying to prevent a hot nympho cartoon babe from crossing back over into the REAL world, because this will somehow cause armageddon (I guess like mixing Matter & Anti-Matter)???

-THIS is the Premise???

Yet even as convoluted as all this is just to start with, it MIGHT still be forgivable, IF the rest of the film actually had ANYTHING going for it whatsoever!

But ALL it has are really ANNOYING characters, and really BAD art!

Keep in mind that, ' C.W. ', came out years AFTER, ' Roger Rabbit ", whose success it was obviously trying to cash in on, and while of course Bakshi did not have access to Disney's Deep Pockets, he STILL did have $30 million!

Yet the quality of the artwork in, ' C.W. ', is nevertheless SO fecal that it actually made me nostalgic for, ' Mary Poppins '. At least Dick Van Dyke & Julie Andrews appeared to be enjoying themselves-Unlike anyone involved in this monstrosity!

Undoubtedly one of the Worst movies I have ever seen-Excruciatingly Awful in Every Way! It is too kind to give it even ONE Star!

Did I mention that I did not care for this film?

M

First Knight (1995)

An Underrated Gem...

[8/10 · 31 May 2015]

I have read a number of negative reviews of this film, including the criticisms that Gere is miscast, & that it's not historically accurate (even though it is about fictional characters-???)

While these people are of course entitled to their opinion, I think they miss the point here:

' F.K. ', was NEVER intended to be a remake of, ' Camelot ' (1967), or, ' Excalibur ' (1981). Rather, it is its OWN story, with its OWN identity, which just happens to also utilize the characters of Arthur, Lancelot, & Guinevere.

In fact, you get the vibe that this is an, ' Alternate-Reality ', version of that realm, sans the sorcery, and with Gere as a kind of California-Slacker-Type-Hero, which he actually plays very well.

So when taken on its OWN terms, it is an example of exquisite film-making.

M

The Count of Monte Cristo (1934)

Kind of Disappointing...

[6/10 · 29 April 2015]

POSSIBLE SPOILERS:

I recently watched this version of tCoMC. I have already previously seen these other versions:

1974 with Richard Chamberlain

1998 with Gerard Depardieu

2002 with Jim Caveziel

(Apologies if I misspelled any names)

I have also read the book by A. Dumas.

Robert Donat was a good actor, but his delivery in this role seems like he felt obligated to essentially break down the ' Fourth Wall ", & explain everything to the audience, almost like we were in Kindergarten.

In addition, the finale involving the public trial of Dantes has NOTHING to do with the original story (Nor does the saccharin happy ending, although other versions have also succumbed to this too)!

So despite its good points, this version nevertheless departs SO much from the novel, that I cannot recommend it.

The 1974 version with Chamberlain may not be perfect, but it's is still the truest to Dumas that I have yet seen.

M

Batman: The Animated Series: I Am the Night (1992) Season 1, Episode 34

My Fave Episode of the Series!

[9/10 · 9 November 2014]

B:TAS is in my opinion pound-for-pound the BEST TV series of the past 30 years.

And ' IAtN ' is my fave Ep of the series.

It is so full of brooding pathos, and such a vivid portrait of Batman's tortured soul, and later, his redemption, that it is everything that the Batman Series is supposed to be.

I give it a 9 only b/c Mark Hamill's Joker is not in it ;-).

BTW: In an interesting coincidence, today is 9 NOV 2014: 22 years to the day that this Ep first aired.

M

Dead Man on Campus (1998)

A Guilty Pleasure...

[7/10 · 20 June 2014]

After having to endure the incessantly clean-cut wise ass character of Mark-Paul Gosselar in Saved By the Bell all those years, I really did not expect to see anything different in this movie, or to like it it all.

But in truth, DMoC is funny.

The script is clever, and the cast, including-yes-Gosselar, really clicks together. I really don't understand why it did not do better when it was first released in 1998.

A great movie? No.

but good enough to be a guilty pleasure? Yes.

M

Lawrence of Arabia (1962)

Visually Stunning, Yet Without Enough Structure

[7/10 · 24 May 2014]

Some time back I read, ' The Uncrowned King of Arabia ', Michael Asher's BIO of T. E. Lawrence. In the book, Asher traces Lawrence's history, his sexual conflicts, his motives, as well as the geo-politics of the region, in great detail.

So as visually breathtaking as Lean's film is, it is still nonetheless frustrating to watch, for me at least, because it makes little if any attempt to touch on any of the above topics.

This frustration starts right at the beginning, when Lean devotes several minutes in the main title sequence, to a static shot of Lawrence's parked motorcycle (???). Then, after we are shown Lawrence crash, and his church memorial service, we are abruptly transported back in time.

Now those of us with some familiarity with the story will of course know that this is WW1, in which Lawrence is serving as a young British Intelligence Officer, & where he started out as essentially a map clerk, somewhere in Arabia.

Yet the uninitiated are basically just left to guess.

And soon, and again abruptly, Lawrence is assigned to make contact with the nomadic Arab tribes, in order to facilitate revolt against the enemy German-allied Turks.

Did Lean not believe that any back story was necessary to explain how Lawrence arrives at this point in his life? Such as:

-How he came to serve in the Military?

-How he came to speak Arabic?

-How he came to be selected for such an esoteric assignment?

Moreover, as I watched the film, it was striking to me that there was not a single subtitle or voice-over to provide the date/location/details of any of the events.

Contrast this with other historical films such as, ' The Longest Day ', or, ' Raging Bull ', or even, ' Chaplin ', which provides such info, and also makes its significance clear.

The absence of this info creates the effect of a circular panoramic mural: Beautiful to look at, but challenging to follow, without a clear beginning, or clear direction, or clear ending.

So IF this, ' Panoramic ', effect was in fact Lean's intention, then he succeeded brilliantly, but I would have preferred more clarity.

M

Mad Max Beyond Thunderdome (1985)

One of the Worst Sequels I Have Ever Seen...

[1/10 · 10 May 2014]

Possible Spoilers:

In 1979, the first Mad Max came out (Although the story goes it was actually filmed in 1977, as Director George Miller's Film School Project).

At any rate, it was a low-budget film that achieved a cult status.

Then came 1981's MM2: TRW. One of my all-time favorite movies, largely because Miller combines a tortured, minimalist performance by Gibson, offset by almost cartoon-like violence, comic relief by other characters, along with some of the best cinematography in any 1980's film, all so brilliantly, that the result is much greater than the sum of its parts.

In addition, Brian May's brooding operatic score was so good, & contributed so much to the overall feel of the film, that I have pondered over the years that it must have influenced Danny Elfman's soundtrack to Tim Burton's 1989 ' Batman '.

At any rate, it was a great movie.

But Miller could not just quit while he was ahead-He had to go for the ' Hat-Trick '.

The result being 1985's MM: BT: A film that starts with Gibson,' The Road Warrior ', looking more like ' Lawrence of Arabia ' as he trades his Bad-Ass Black Ford Falcon Interceptor for-A covered wagon pulled by Camels???

-WTF???

A film that trades May's score for pop tunes by Tina Turner.

-WTF???

A film that trades SOME plot in TRW, for NO coherent plot at all!

-WTF???

A film that is so absurdly campy, that Turner herself looks like she is trying to be a drag queen!

-WTF???

A film where NONE of the action makes any sense, least of all the ending.

-WTF???

So if this trilogy were a Three-Course Meal, then MM would be the appetizer, TRW would be the Filet Mignon Entree, and BT would be Miller's big steaming dump in a dessert dish.

Shame on you, George.

M

Léon: The Professional (1994)

One of My All Time Favorite Movies...

[9/10 · 30 April 2014]

Possible Spoilers:

OK-So let's say it's circa 1993, and your Luc Besson, pitching this film to the potential producers.

You tell them that you want to make a serious action/drama, where a professional hit man is the good guy, and law enforcement are the bad guys-

-But that's just for starters:

-The hit man's love interest is a 12 year old girl!

-And they have a relationship that is tender and caring, without being creepy!

-And Jean Reno, & especially the great Gary Oldman, are sure to deliver in their roles. But the real star will be 13-year old Natalie Portman, whose performance is so amazing that it's almost unbelievable!

-And the over-the-top-action, that would be absurd in nearly any other context, will work here.

Sounds ridiculous, doesn't it?

But this is exactly what Besson, by sheer skill & finesse as a director, achieves with this film.

And this is why, ' L:t.P. ', is one of my all time favorite movies!

M

Something's Gotta Give (2003)

The Angry Aging Feminist Answer To Strip Clubs...

[4/10 · 28 March 2014]

When older guys (those who aren't rich & famous like Jack Nicholson, that is) want to believe that they are still attractive to hot young women, they go to places like strip clubs or, ' Hooters ', & indulge their fantasies, at least as long as their time & money last. Yet deep-down everyone knows that it's all just a temporary illusion.

But when angry aging feminists want to believe that they are still attractive to younger men, they write/direct/star in/support movies like 2003's, ' S.G.t.G. ", in which they too can temporarily live out their own fantasies.

In reality, however, no man with a heartbeat would EVER willingly choose to be with a 2003 version of Diane Keaton, over a 2003 version of Amanda Peet (who is hardly A-List fantasy material herself).

Now perhaps in the big picture, this reality is somewhat unjust.

But, as the old saying goes, Life's Not Fair.

Yet these angry aging feminists are so incapable of accepting this reality, that their only recourse is to try & project their desperate wishful-thinking forcefully enough, so that someone else actually buys into it.

And before anyone bares their fangs & claws, and bites my head off, just please answer me this one question:

Back when Keaton was at her peak, both in terms of her looks, and her popularity, and was starring in hit films opposite Hollywood's top male stars of that era (Al Pacino in, ' The Godfather ', Woody Allen in, ' Annie Hall ', Richard Gere in, ' Looking for Mr. Goodbar ', Etc.), can you please list for me just ONE (1) time that she herself played a character who lost her leading man to an older woman???

-I Didn't Think So.

So let's please not be hypocrites here, ladies...

M

The Great Gatsby (2013)

Surreally Entertaining...

[7/10 · 21 March 2014]

For those of us old enough to remember the 1974 version of ' T.G.G. ' with Robert Redford (a good film in its own right), this version is a change to say the least.

Obviously, it's not fair to compare elements such as Production Values, and especially Cinematography, between the two films. simply due to advances in technology 40 years later.

The cast, led by DiCaprio, are competent, considering that they all battling for attention against the screaming Music Video ambiance that nearly overwhelms both the actors, and the plot, to the point that the this Atmosphere is itself the real star of this film.

It also doesn't help that modern Hip-Hop songs are injected into a story that is supposed to take place in the 1920's, but I guess that's what happens when Jay-Z is a producer...

However, if you can look past these faults, the film is entertaining, and reasonably true to the book.

M

The Beach (I) (2000)

A Passage To Thailand...

[6/10 · 10 March 2014]

Many years ago I watched David Lean's, ' A Passage To India '.

I came away from that film feeling like I had not experienced a ,' whole ' , movie, because while it was a visually stunning travelogue of that country, it really had no plot to speak of.

I feel the same way about, ' The Beach', a film that is also visually stunning, but again, has no real plot to speak of (Unless you count a young Leonardo DiCaprio, & a bunch of other attractive people, cavorting around Southeast Asia, getting high, & having sex, apparently just for kicks).

So IF the visuals by themselves are enough to keep you entertained, then knock yourself out.

But to get through, ' tB ', I'll need to turn the sound down, & put on some smooth jazz...

M

Anastasia (1997)

Entertaining, But Overly Self-Conscious...

[7/10 · 14 February 2014]

When I reviewed Don Bluth's last feature to date,' Titan A.E. ', I listed his uneven track record, culminating in that box office flop.

' A ', on the other hand, is probably Bluth's strongest film effort. It features solid writing, graphics, voice-acting, & songs, all of which gives Disney a run for it's money.

But that's the problem: Everything in this film-the character design, storytelling style, Etc.-screams: " We Are Trying To Look Like ' Big D ', SO loudly, that it's deafening.

This of course, is ironic, because it is precisely because Bluth imitation of D's style is so obvious here, that he succeeds in competing against them, at least in this case.

Perhaps if Bluth had repeated more of this D-like formula more often, he would have been more successful...

M

Les Misérables (2012)

Ambitious, Star-Studded, But MIS-CAST...

[6/10 · 14 January 2014]

I have been a big fan of LM ever since watching the broadcast of the 10th Anniversary Production back in 1995, which I thought was stunning.

Then came the 25th Anniversary in 2010, which was probably staged better, but in my view did not have quite as strong of a cast.

So now we finally have the big-budget film version, with an all-star cast.

The result?

Well, unfortunately, it appears the producers sacrificed actual talent that was right for the roles, for name-recognition in those roles:

Hugh Jackman as Jean-Valjean: Jackman is a talented actor, with a competent singing voice.

But this role required a talented actor, and one who could convey aging, and one with a SUPERB singing voice.

Every moment Jackman was in a scene, I could not avoid envisioning the awesome world-weary power of Colm Wilkinson from the 1995 Production, and how there is really no comparison (Alfie Boe from the 2010 Production was also good, but he seemed too young & frail for what this character called for-at least to me).

So to put this in perspective, think of either Wilkinson or Boe trying to play ' Wolverine ', and you can see my point.

Russel Crowe as Javert: Again, we have a talented actor, but if Jackman's singing voice is at least competent, Crowe's is almost non-existent!

Maybe, in Crowe's case, instead of recording the songs in real-time on the set, they SHOULD have dubbed them in later! It might have made him less painful to listen to!

It made me nostalgic for Philip Quast.

Anne Hathaway is beautiful and can act, but again, she only has a mediocre singing voice. Not in the same league as either Ruthie Henshall, or Lea Salonga.

Sacha-Baron Cohen: I just did not buy this guy as Thenardier. I saw none of the rodent-faced menace or style as that of Alun Armstrong. Too young & too fresh-faced. Not the right role for ' Borat '

The remaining cast were for the most part newcomers, and were good under the circumstances.

M

Life of Pi (2012)

' The Blue Planet ' meets ' The Usual Suspects ':

[6/10 · 10 January 2014]

Spoilers: Let me say that the open-sea sequences in LoP are among the most spectacular ever on film. This visual spectacle is nothing less than breathtaking.

The problem is the ending.

Without giving away anything more, I'll just say that I feel same away about this ending as that of, ' The Usual Suspects ', because in both films, the audience is basically suckered into what some people might call this a ' Twist ', but I call a ' Bait & Switch ', where I felt confused-and even ' tricked '.

Perhaps I missed something here...

Wolverine and the X-Men (2008–2009)

Excellent!

[8/10 · 7 September 2013]

To date, the X-Men have had four animated incarnations on TV.

The first was 1989's " Pryde of the X-Men "(unless you count some sporadic appearances of X-Men characters in episodes of " Spiderman & His Amazing Friends ", from the early 1980's).

Then from 1992-97, Fox network aired, " X-Men ", which used some the art from " Pryde ", but was much more involved.

After the release of the first live action film in 2000, " X-Men Evolution " aired on Kids WB, though I still don't understand to this day why the main characters were made to be high school students?

So the latest version is "Wolverine and the X-Men", which is, in a word-Excellent!

In W.A.T.X.M., the more purist characters and atmosphere of the 1992 series, is combined with the superior graphics of ' Evolution '.

The result is a show that is superior to its predecessors in nearly every way-I say NEARLY because the writing & voice acting of the 1992 series still remains unmatched in my opinion. This series also seems to closely follow the continuity of the live action films.

In addition, it should be noted that the late Boyd Kirkland, who was one of the creators of the original ' Batman: The Animated Series ', served as Producer on both " Evo ", and " W.A.T.X.M. ".

M

Kick-Ass (2010)

What Is This Movie Supposed To Be???

[4/10 · 18 August 2013]

I'm not exactly sure what to make of, ' K-A ', which is kind of a mix of, ' Hero At Large ', meets, ' The Dark Knight ', meets, ' The Big Hit ', meets, ' The Punisher ', with some, ' Leon: The Professional ', too.

I don't even know how to clearly categorize it! It's part Adolescent Super-Hero Fantasy, and part Vigilante Revenge Story, and part Dark Comedy Satirizing Violence in Today's Society!

-But What Is It Supposed to Be???

And if the answer is: All of the Above, then that is too much crammed into just one movie to be enjoyable-At least in this case.

The premise of an unintimidating nerd dressing up like a superhero, and his antics leading to absurd and gratuitous and intense violence, is somewhat interesting.

And I don't have a problem with violence in a movie-even when the violence is absurd and gratuitous and intense-IF it fits the movie.

But I'm not sure how all the absurd & gratuitous and intense violence fits in this movie:

I am not sure how I am supposed to feel about a father and Underage daughter team of, ' Heroes ', who nonetheless appear to be just as vengeful and bloodthirsty as the villains! Are we supposed to be cheering for them, or even taking them seriously at all?

And I am not sure how I am supposed to feel when I see a gang of thugs beat the living hell out of people-including young people-Up Close.

And I'm not sure how I am supposed to feel when I see Pre-Teen Chloe Grace Moretz brandish blades and high-end firepower to skillfully waste bad guys.

So how do I feel about, ' K-A '? -Confused!

But one thing I am sure of: I did not come away from watching, ' K-A ', feeling like I had fun, which is supposed to be the whole point.

M

The Hilarious House of Frightenstein (1971– )

Rocky Horror Meets Uncle Floyd

[7/10 · 14 July 2013]

The best way to describe, ' T.H.H.o.F. ', is a cross between the camp musical burlesque atmosphere of, ' The Rocky Horror Picture Show ', and the self-referential Tongue-in-Cheek humor of the low-budget, ' Uncle Floyd Show ' (the latter may be an inside joke for those of us in the NYC area).

You can find clips on Youtube, and you'll see what I mean. My personal fave is Gronk Mad-Libbing over the Count's, ' Serious ', book-reading. -Ah, Childhood Memories!

I have to admit that it never occurred to me as a kid that nearly all the characters were played by the late Billy Van.

M

Titan A.E. (2000)

Poor Don's Swan Song...

[4/10 · 3 July 2013]

Possible Spoilers:

Over the years, Disney Alumnus Don Bluth has had some hits:

' The Land Before Time ', series, ' An American Tale ', and a bigger hit with, ' Anastasia '.

Yet he has also had some misses:

' Rock-a-Doodle ', ' The Pebble & the Penguin ', ' A Troll in Central Park ' , ' The Swan Princess ', Etc.

-Big Misses...

Now it's clear that Bluth puts of lot of care and effort into his work, but it is also just as clear that his work is simply not on the same level as his chief rival in 2D animation, Big D. His graphics lack the vividness and warmth and fluidity of motion, & his characters and stories lack the appeal, of D's best work.

Now this could be simply because Bluth does not have the same resources as D, but whatever the reason, it is an immediately noticeable drawback.

This brings us to, ' TAE ', a film that seems to showcase all of Bluth's handicaps:

1. It is PG-rated (There is a shot of a naked human butt, as well as an on-screen death). Now I am a big fan of animation, but I cannot remember when a PG-rated 2D animated feature ever became a smash hit (As I recall, D's PG, ' Atlantis ', was not received that well either, although the PG Pixar, ' Dinosaur ', was successful. However, ' Dino ', was of course 3D).

Did Bluth really believe that mommies & daddies would bring their little ones in large numbers to see this film?

And if he was aiming at the esoteric adult animation crowd, then how could he expect to recoup his $75,000,000 budget?

So Who Exactly Was Supposed to Be the Target Audience Here???

2. The story: Shiny aliens who look like expensive Bling have destroyed the earth?

The hero is a Luke Skywalker clone, who teams up with a Han Solo clone, so the Han clone must be a good guy, right?

Wait! He's a bad guy?

No, hold on! He's really kind of a good guy in the end, but some of his crew are still bad guys?

-Ugh! This is all making my head hurt...

3. Now let's get to the graphics:

In my view, Big D's, ' Aladdin ', is the standard that I measure all other 2D feature animation against, simply because everything in that film is so stunningly beautiful, that you can even enjoy it with the sound down, just to drink in the striking visuals.

Yet, sadly, ' TAE ', fails to measure up here as well. Not the same quality, either in coloring, backgrounds, or character design (Jeanine Garofalo as a giant kangaroo with rickets???)

I just never felt like I was watching a real work of art. It's also worth noting that, ' TAE ', was produced nearly a decade AFTER, ' Aladdin ', so Bluth had the advantage of advances in graphics technology, which makes it all the more frustrating that Bluth did not improve his artwork.

The result? Well, It's my understanding that, ' TAE ', bombed so badly that it nearly bankrupted FOX Animation, until that studio later rebounded with the 3D, ' Ice Age ', which Bluth was not involved in.

And, ' TAE ', is Bluth's last animated feature to date, more than a decade later.

I think that pretty much says it all.

One final note: It is interesting that, ' Preed ', was voiced by Nathan Lane, only a few years after voicing, ' Timon ', in D's, ' The Lion King ', and that after, ' TAE ', Garofalo went on to voice, ' Colette ', in Disney/Pixar's 3D hit, ' Ratatouille '.

M

Jersey Shore (2009–2012)

A Disgrace To The Garden State

[1/10 · 29 June 2013]

I thought that ' Toddlers & Tiaras ' was bad, but at least their outrageous behavior can be at least partially excused as they are children.

But in the case of ' TJS ', these are ' adults '.

Adults who revel in being caricatures of every insulting NJ stereotype.

Adults who have brought nothing but Shame & Embarrassment to the state that I call home.

If there was any justice, their part of the Shore would have been destroyed by Hurricane Sandy-While They Were On It!!!

Did I mention that I don't like this show either?

M

The Dark Knight Rises (2012)

Sprawling, Enthralling, and...Frustrating!

[6/10 · 17 June 2013]

POSSIBLE SPOILERS:

The late Liberace said, " Too Much of a Good Thing is Wonderful! "

Unfortunately, that maxim does not apply to TDKR. For here we have a movie that has more good things that it knows what to do with, and ultimately, all this excess weight brings it down from the status of a masterwork, like, ' T.D.K. ', before it.

The film starts out SO strong, with such clear and crisp character and story introductions that you feel certain that you are viewing a future classic. It also helps that Anne Hathaway is by far the hottest Catwoman Ever!

But then, every good ingredient and plot device gets poured on with a dump truck:

Here are some examples-

SPOILERS:

-Thousands of police get trapped underground with only bare minimum supplies for months? And yet they are still able to emerge ready to fight?

-Bane outfights, overpowers, and defeats Batman, & then goes to all the trouble to place Bruce Wayne in a huge hole in the ground, which is somewhere-we don't know where, and leaves him unguarded???

-And when Bruce gets free, and has no money, nor means of communication, nor any other resources. Nor does he even know where in the world he is! Yet a short time later, he arrives safely back in Gotham, a city which has had all routes to the outside world severed!!!

-When Batman faces Bane again for the rematch, he is coming off of months in a prison cell, with no means to train seriously, or develop new tactics, or even properly heal from any of his injuries. Yet he still overpowers the same foe that beat him so badly the first time.

All this just seemed so superfluous and over the top: Wouldn't it have been much more believable to-

-have the cops trapped underground for just a s matter of hours?

-And have Bane confine Bruce someplace nearer to the action, so he could get back in the action sooner?

-And have Bruce some way to heal and get his, ' mojo ', back, so that we could actually buy him taking down Bane in the rematch?

Now of course, ' T.D.K. ', had the great advantage of Heath Ledger's amazing performance. Yet another reason it worked so well is that, despite being a superhero movie, Nolan's direction, as well as the script, were both so lean and muscular and focused, that the story could still tread on the razor's edge of believability, to the point of even creating the appearance of some gritty realism.

But, ' T.D.K.R. ', can make no such illusion seem real, not after the first hour or so, anyway. It just tries to do too much.

So in this case, too much of a good thing is, sadly, not wonderful.

BTW: Another reviewer also noted that the plot in this film appeared to borrow from the 1999 James Bond flick, ' The World is Not Enough ". Well, to be sure there are similarities, but since Hollywood films by their nature seem to parasitically feed off of their predecessors, I'll let someone else judge that.

M