noseyq Reviews

The Train (1964)

A full head of steam for a real actioner!

[30 June 2004]

Rewatched this movie again for about the umpteenth time the other night and was horrified to rediscover it had been made back in 1964 - 40 years ago. For a really gritty performance from Burt Lancaster, this is unbeatable, and everything about this whole movie is just a delight. You can almost smell the dirty old coal-fired locos which I grew up with back in England as a babyboomer born a few years after the war. The sight and sound and smell - not to mention the soot and pollution - from those things had a real romance to them. I think one of my favorite characters in the old guy who runs out of the trains and doesn't mind making his feelings known about the Germans. A real railroadsman. On a points basis I'd give this one a strong 9 - it doesn't date with time and it tells a compelling story, with some great action.

The Dam Busters (1955)

One of the great British war movies

[30 June 2004]

Now that everyone has taken their shots at this magnificent movie, just a couple of comments about it to help put it into context. A) No we didn't see Russian prisoners of war trying to flee for their lives and drowning. We didn't in fact see anybody drowning. But this is war and people die in wars, it's the nature of the beast. B) Seen in its current setting, especially in North America, the use of the name Nigger for the Black Labrador may seem upsetting and racist, explaining why that section of the movie is left out sometimes. But back in Britain in those days, it would not have been regarded as so nasty and derogatory as it now seems here. It was actually a fair common name for Black Labs at the time - though not any more of course. C) Nope, the movie isn't entirely accurate in all aspects - many years after I first saw it back in the UK, a bomber pilot from those days told me that they used not a Lancaster but I think a Halifax to plough into the ground. D) Maybe it did glorify Guy Gibson, but he earned that Victoria Cross, if I recall, for all his diversionary flights to draw off the flak from the other aircraft, who must have felt like sitting ducks the way they had to drop every bomb at precisely the same spot and height, very low over the water. If the movie gives him credit for thinking up the overlapping spotlights, we can take that as artistic licence. Finally, anything which slowed down the German war machine was crucial to Britain. This movie did its best with hardly-developed special effects and produced an exciting and fine picture, made still during the days of rationing in England. I know because I was there at the time. I was just six when this movie was made in 1954 but it's still a real favorite of mine, not least because we were living on the shores of Lake Windermere, England's largest lake, in the English Lake District at the time, and they flew right in over our house for about six weeks that summer to film some parts of it. Remember the scene where after one of the practice runs, they were picking bits of tree out of the undercarriage of one of the aircraft? My father always used to remind that they clipped one of our trees in the filming one day and he used to claim that those bits of branch and foliage actually came from our tree. I guess they probably didn't really and they faked it a bit for the movie, adding that bit of dialogue into the script after the incident because it showed how low they flew. Quite why they showed it in the landing gear I'm not sure, because of course they wouldn't have been flying with their landing gear down, but it is effective in showing how low they flew both in the raid and in the filming. I've always loved this movie though - it's a beaut, as they say - not least because I grew up with Black Labradors. I wept like a baby when Nigger died. Have just watched it for about the zillionth time - have literally lost count. It's still a fine and fitting tribute to the men who gave their lives in the raid all those years ago.

The Producers (1967)

Watch out for your underwear

[5 December 2003]

If you have never seen this now quite antique (though not antiquated) movie, track it down in your favorite video store and settle in for an evening of hysteria (on and off the screen). But be sure that you have a full box of eye-wipers for the tears that will pour out of you from laughter and be ready to run off to the bathroom to ensure you don't wet yourself over some of the absolutely manic antics in this brilliant movie. I truly thought I was going to do myself some embarrassment at times. Others have explained the plot and some of the best moments of the movie, so I won't go into that, but it's ranked 7.8 out of 10 on the IMDB rating scale right now and this does this zany, madcap piece of genius a serious disservice. I will be voting it a full 10 stars. DO NOT MISS THIS ONE. TRAVEL TO THE ENDS OF THE EARTH TO FIND IT AND ENJOY ONE OF THE FUNNIEST EVENINGS OF YOUR LIFE.

A Touch of Frost (1992–2010)

Enough to make you drool

[1 March 2003]

Another of my favorite shows and one I try not to miss. I just savor every moment of this wonderful series about a rather dowdy little British detective who constantly runs into trouble with his uniformed superiors and everlastingly rocks "the establishment" within the Denton police force. Quirky, eccentric and not adverse to bursting the bubbles of his snobby and stiff bosses, he's really a copper's copper (without the helmet) and always leads us through such an entertaining series of plot twists and turns, it's really quite irresistible. Oh what fun!!

Soap (1977–1981)

Oh, the nostalgia

[1 March 2003]

I came across this one when it first aired shortly after I came to Canada, and I thought it was one of the funniest shows ever made for TV, with everyone enjoying poking fun at TV soap shows. Some of the characters were utterly brilliant and/or perfect foils for others and at times I thought I was going to do myself an injury I laughed so hard. The wonderful - though perhaps not very amazing - thing was how many of the actors went on to their own series and fame and fortune afterwards - Billy C., Katherine H., Richard S., Robert G., to name but a few, and the shorter, vignette appearances were as brilliant and memorable as some of the main roles. I was genuinely saddened when they wrote out one or two of the roles - and shocked and horrified when ABC abruptly pulled the plug on it. I guess it just showed up the real soaps for how stupid and silly they really are and the networks were making an awful lot of money from those - and still are!!!(It's incredible how people will put up with that stuff without throwing a brick through the screen!) Sadly, Soap, for all its innovative ideas and killingly-funny skits way back 25 years ago, really hasn't stood up to the test of time. TV, soaps, comedy and touchy topics have moved on and the show is no longer nearly as funny as it was originally. Now running on the Comedy Channel once a week (way too infrequently to provide the momentum it now truly needs), it still brings back twinges and some of the performances are obviously as good as they were back in the 70s. But the comedy isn't as fresh as it was, the shine is off the peach, and I guess it's fair to say that even nostalgia isn't quite what it used to be! I'm still enjoying it enough to put it on tape though - that's an opportunity I don't want to miss. Way to go, Ms Harris and your fine cast!!

The American President (1995)

Chick flick, but good

[4 February 2003]

My wife LOVES this movie, so we finally got a copy and I've seen it about five kazillion times, but have to admit that as a light and fluffy chick flick it does somehow stand the test of time and repetition. There are some good quotable lines in it and you can hear some of them repeated in The West Wing, which I also find compulsive viewing (same writers etc). After all, we all need a good image of the American Presidency while You Know Who is at the helm in reality!!!!!

The Sandbaggers (1978–1980)

One wordy show, but fascinating

[3 August 2002]

I can't remember how I managed to stumble across this series a good many years ago now, but somehow - and I still haven't been able to work out just how - it managed to hook me almost instantly. There is so much subterfuge, nasty, backroom dealings and internal politics going on and plain intrigue that it hardly matters that there's almost no real action in this series. Virtually everything goes on in the offices of the Sandbagger unit and there's not even very much outdoor camera work, so I suspect this series was made on an incredibly cheap budget, but the scripts are good, the plots are believable, the acting is excellent when you consider that these guys are spies who are not meant to betray too much emotion, and the tension is constant. Good British psychological drama.

Winston Churchill: The Wilderness Years (1981)

Outstanding drama, shot in THE location

[29 July 2002]

Have to agree with everything that the others have said before me. This is a superb, outstanding drama and the kind of thing that good modern history lessons should be built around in school. One or two others have described it as flawless - I agree: and some of the dramatic touches added by the lighting are almost genius. One thing that some people may not know is that some of it - particularly some of the outdoor scenes but also I suspect, some appropriate indoor scenes - were shot at Chartwell, Churchill's country house which is preserved for the public and has a warm and friendly, home "family" atmosphere. And yes, Churchill did indeed get a kick out of building a wall or two there, as well as painting some interesting pictures - his art is much more highly regarded by the critics than Hitler's!!

Danger UXB (1979)

Second-by-second drama

[29 July 2002]

By now, anyone who hasn't seen this incredible series but has drifted across the reviews here with know that this amazing series is about an ordnance unit in Britain during the worst days of World War II as the Germans dreamed up increasingly ingenious bombs for killing British citizenry. As you follow individual members of the unit through the vicious business of trying to outsmart inventors whose main objective in life is killing if not civilians then the bomb-disposal experts, you can't help but cringe every second that one of the UXB heroes is working on a bomb. This is real-life, gut-wrenching drama at its best. Any of those bombs can go up at any second - and some of them do. With well-delineated characters which we can empathize with, this was one series that I went so far as requesting The History Channel to repeat. I thought I'd died and gone upstairs when they actually did. You won't want to miss a single episode, and you'll grip the edge of the chesterfield and clench your teeth as they try to deal with the fascinating array of different bombs. Way to go, Mr. Hawkesworth!!

The Duellists (1977)

A fine wine of a movie

[2 July 2002]

The whole touch and "feel" of this marvellous movie is like slowly sipping a wonderfully rich and satisfying glass of superb wine. At regular moments throughout the film, the director takes the time to give you a photographic setting of the scene and you feel like you're looking at some great painting or masterpiece on canvas while still looking at a piece of atmospheric photography. The duelling is rivettingly realistic and the characters of the two main protagonists are rounded, deep and fascinating. Keitel is just a plain nasty man who is arrogant, hate-filled and remorselessly vindictive, never forgetting an enemy, even one of his own creating from an imagined slight. The resulting feud drags on for about 15 years, with Keitel determined to avenge himself and kill his more honorable and sometimes rather bemused arch-enemy out of blood-lust, pure vindictiveness and a desire to inflict a humiliating defeat - something he is repeatedly denied. The end solution is perfect. Sit back and enjoy a brilliant and ageless portrayal of two men caught up in the Napoleonic Wars, including the mercilessly cold Retreat from Moscow. Usually I don't particularly care for this kind of repeat-fighting gendre of a movie but this somehow manages to climb out of that kind of a mire. Out of 10, I rate this another flawless 10.

Colditz (1972–1974)

Strange psychological drama

[1 July 2002]

This outstanding series is the kind of psychological drama at which the British excell. Set almost entirely within a reconstruction of the now-famous castle-fortress prisoner-of-war camp during WWII, there is little in the way of physical action. Instead we're treated to some of the best form of "mind games" and psychological manoeuvring and competition you can hope to see on TV, as the two sides constantly strive to get one over on the other. The Allied prisoners are determined not to be beaten mentally by their surroundings and look for every possible means of escape, while the Germans are always on their toes, looking for clues about possible break-outs and ways in which the Allied prisoners are trying to outsmart them. I couldn't tear myself away from the series when it first came out in Britain, and I was pleased to see how little it had aged when it was reshown on the History Channel a couple of years ago. Excellent acting and strong story lines make this a must-see for me. Out of 10, I'd rank it about 13.6!!

Hush (1998)

Ghastly title, okay movie

[15 January 2002]

I'm not sure quite why they gave this little sleeper of a movie the title they did, except perhaps it was a throw-back to Hush, Hush, Sweet Charlotte. The movie kinda follows in the earlier movie's footsteps, except it's more modern, less melodramatic and probably less successful as a portrait of a derenaged mother/mother-in-law who is determined to hang on to everything and everyone - with the single exception of daughter-in-law Gwyneth. Lange does a pretty fair job of acting the scheming mom, and Gwyneth (a favorite of mine to look at) does an okay job with the role she's given. The plot does stretch a bit thin occasionally and the setting on a horse ranch hardly provides much drama, but overall it seems to work reasonably well for a rainy afternoon, and I think it's generally been given a bit of a "bum rap". I'd say it's worth about six to 6.5 out of 10 for one or two original ideas.

Armageddon (1998)

An astronomic waste of time

[12 January 2002]

Oh dear, we go again, experiencing the usual Americans-can-walk-on-water syndrome all over again and again. This is the stuff of the old and very bad American war movies, in which American heroes of the piece are able to come through any kind of danger and predicament virtually with their hair unruffled, just because they happen to be American and the script heroes. Only this time it's in space, so it's even more unlikely unbelievable, tediously and boringly repetitive. Our buddies are kitted in space suits which seem to be able to come through just about any kind of explosion and abuse unscathed, unpunctured, undamaged. The same thing can be said of the one vital space craft needed for bringing home our earth-bound heroine's boyfriend, while her dad sacrifices himself instead for humanity. Even the special effects become boring, trite, confused and unconvincing. Otherwise, a typical Bruce-Willis-do-and/or-die feast of machoism. Out of 10, I'd give it maybe two to three.

The Producers (1967)

Pure, brilliant hilarity

[12 January 2002]

It wasn't until years after this wonderful movie came out that I finally saw it. I can say with absolute truth that after being delighted and entertained by the tremendous script and witty play-off between the two main actors, who are perfect foils for each other. I didn't think it was going to get any better, but it did. I really thought I was going to hurt myself I was laughing so hard during the Springtime For Hitler on-stage production. The segments on the rehearsals had been funny, but this went right off the scale and is now one of my all-time favorite pieces of cinematography. Sit back, put up your feet and enjoy. On a scale of 1 to 10, I'd have to give it somewhere way over 2,000.

Monte Walsh (1970)

A stunning tribute to a way of life as it fades in America

[7 November 2001]

Of all the Western movies I've seen over the years - and it's been quite a few - this is one of the most outstanding. It's really about the honorable way of earning a living by working with and breaking horses and being a cowboy. As that way of lifestyle and profession reach their final stages and start to fade away in America, Palance and his cronies face losing their livelihood, their dignity and their ruggedly-independent way of life. An entire culture stands on the brink of oblivion and the viewer can only be touched by the deeply sensitive way that is handled in this movie and by the incredible performance Palance give as a stoic but caring man who is facing having his whole world shaken and shattered. Palance knows in his heart of hearts that he would rather die than give up his threatened lifestyle. It's hard and it's tough and it's certainly a man's world but it's an honorable and once-honored means of earning a crust or two, and one can't help but share Palance's pain when one of his closest friends goes off the rails and turns to crime when he loses his job as a cowboy. And you feel for him too when he cannot commit to a softer way of life settling down with Jean Moreau, choosing instead to head off "into the sunset" in the vague and obviously vain hope of everything turning around and turning out all right in the end. That's what makes the unbelievably catchy song The Good Times Are Coming so heart-achingly sad. You just know that those good times aren't really coming - they're behind him. No Hollywood glamor here, just a wonderful portrayal of an unambitious but totally honest man who wants to keep on enjoying his times with the boys, riding herds and busting broncos, and refusing to recognize that those days are gone forever. A five-star Western if ever I saw one.