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Citadel (2023)
And another "bad guys get the nuclear codes" derivative
Just employing a brain for 5 seconds will make you realize just how hackneyed tge storyline is.
Episode 1: Vast spy network is taken out all in one day, but there are two survivors who, 8 years later team up with their mentor to stop the bad guy stealing all the world's nuclear codes.
Plot holes:
1) Bad guys spend all this time and energy killing the spys, yet fail to do a cursory check to ensure the last two were dead, despite one turning up at a local hospital.
2) The bad guys are plotting - after 8 years - to steal the superspys safe of nuclear codes at the exact same the same time spy #1 does a DNA check and "pings" the radar.
2a) Why does the superspy's network have all the world's "nuclear codes"?
2b) Why hadn't the world changed them in all this time?
2c) There is no such thing as "nuclear codes" - there's a whole apperatus behind the process.
3) Head spy magically locates spy #1, and has the means and apparatus to kidnap him and his family - despite his entire spy system being essentially dead for 8 years.
3a) Who's funding it?
3b) Who's creating all the gadgets and gizmos?
And, as for the opener...if the point of the train setup was to just kill both superspys, why not just kill them? Why the elaborate set up?
Oh jeez...
Suspects (2014)
I love me some good Brit police procedurals, but...
...this isn't one of them.
Got as far as the end of the first episode. Decent idea for a story but three things were so annoyingly awful that I had to stop:
1) No lawyers anywhere. That's right - everyone being interviewed had zero legal representation. They just happily sat there, talking to the single police officer present, saying whatever their unscripted character wanted to say.
2) In contrary to the Police and Criminal Evidence Act, 1984, none of the interviews were carried out the the requisite audio recording equipment.
3) Upon the arrest of a suspect, the DI in charge laughably sent everyone home for the night instead of interviewing here. The British police have a 24 hour window between arrest and a charge - during which they are required to get enough evidence together to convince the CPS that there's enough there to have the suspect charged. In this situation the suspect was caught with the deceased body of the missing toddler. There's absolutely zero chance that any cop, having found the corpse of a toddler, would just "go to bed" without getting the suspect charged.
Between everything else, this show just wasn't for me.
Moonfall (2022)
Leave the brain behind for this.
There are so many potholes, scientific inaccuracies and abject impossibilities in this film, that if one were to take a shot at each occurrence then you'd be passed out before the movie ends.
Which would be a shame because aside from the abject lunacy of the whole thing (like "how come all the satellites are still working at the end, after the moon came within less than a mile of striking the surface of earth?"), you'd miss some barnstorming special effects.
Sure, roughly 99.3% of this film is utterly preposterous (a made up fact, in fitting with the entire movie), but if you can accept that you're watching a total fantasy, you might, just might, have fun.
The 3 stars are for the SFX and John Bradley's spirited performance. Sadly I can't give it any stars for anything else because, quite frankly I've watched Gerry Anderson "Thunderbird" episodes with more convincing plots and situations!
Play or Die (2019)
All over the place
This is a film that has no idea what it wants to be, or even where. Geographically the initial clues are it is set in the UK, but then everyone drives left had drive cars, talk about zip codes and have a very mainland European vibe (given that it was filmed in Belgium). That alone was exceptionally offputting.
Plot wise the film can't decide what it wants to be: is this a corporation running the show, or just a single person? Is this a tale of revenge, or there really a pay off?
When the conclusion is shown one is left scratching one's head in puzzlement as to how the lead character is meant to have created the whole game - with all the complexities and costs involved.
And as for the final reveal - how cliched can one be? There was no need for Lucas to be shown emulating his mother, ala Norman Bates in Pyscho.
None of the earlier scenes in the movie make any sense once we know the truth about Lucas - in fact once you know the story then those scenes become even more annoying to recollect.
I was suckered in to watching this to the end thinking there'd be at least a pay off.
In the end, we the audience just get conned.
Tales from the Loop: Echo Sphere (2020)
A welcome return to form
After the very lacluster 3rd episode "Stasis", Tales of the Loop episode 4 "Echo Sphere" is a wonderful, gentle and bittersweet tale of life, and coming to terms with death.
The SF elements are very much muted here, and this allows the story of Cole, and his Grandpa Russ, to come very nicely to the fore.
The episode for me captures the very essence of the show, that the Loop may be the core of the town, but it's the humans who live and work there that bring it life.
Most excellent and a happy return to form for this interesting little show. More please!
Tales from the Loop: Stasis (2020)
Weakest entry so far
Never have liked stories where some people can exist when the world has frozen in time.
I'm all for the suspension of belief, but if the shoreline has time frozen water, how do our characters drink?
We're all made up of electrons spinning. Even the food we eat is made up the same way. Yet you can eat and digest inert food?
Nothing in this tale makes any sense. The end was as predictable as the science was ignored.
A likable male lead is offset by an equally unlikable female lead.
Won't be watching this one again.
Another Life (2019)
Yes, it's that bad
SFX decent...yeah well that's all I can give this mess.
I really wanted to like it but to have a mutiny in space in the 1st 30 minutes because some snowflake doesn't like the chain of command? Makes no sense given that the crew are apparently still in constant face to face contact with earth.
Gave up at that point. Drama for drama's sake. Even with Battlestar's own Starbuck featured, this is a horrible pile of derivative drivel.
Deadwood (2019)
Finally, after 13 long years, the conclusion I've waited for
What an excellent conclusion to one of the finest shows on HBO. Unexpectedly and unkindly cancelled after it's 3rd season after a tumultuous 3rd season, the absence of a conclusion has left a gaping void that needed filling.
And filled it is. Though slightly hurried by necessity of it being a movie, all the major plot lines are sewn up, characters find their fitting conclusions and Deadwood finally appears allowed to grow up.
Yes, we sadly had to say goodbye to a couple of much loved characters before the conclusion but their passing helped the show go out with the finale I always felt it deserved.
Acting throughout was exemplary, the sets lucious and the language ever bit as gutter-shakespearian as it ever was.
If you loved the show and needed to know how it all "started" (for 'Deadwood' is every bit about the camp as it was the people who called it home) then I recommend this movie.
Game of Thrones: The Long Night (2019)
Should have been great
But it missed the mark for me. Most of the battle was almost too dark to really grasp what was going on and that didn't help the tension. Then, as the battle reached the climax the tempo dropped considerably. I get the that the idea was to show the sheer desperation but it didn't maintain the excitement that should have been there.
Still, Theon died the hero's death he always needed and Anya once and for all showed she's the ultimate badass.
The Shield (2002)
American TV finally grows up!
(Minor spoilers follow) (Review based on series opening episode)
After years with the likes of HBO and Showtime being the few stations who don't mind telling it as it is, 20th Century Fox finally deliver to the masses on the small screen what people in countries such as Britain have known for years - give a cop show a bit of bite and it will invariably deliver.
The Shield', the new show that finally debuted on March 12th 2002, had been heavily promoted by the FX basic cable channel for several months. After all the hullabaloo years ago about how NYPD Blue' was meant to break new boundaries of taste, decency and language, I, for one, was worried that The Shield' was going to go down the same way and be as gritty as a Fudge Sundae.
How wrong I was!
Right from the get-go, The Shield' pulled few punches. Bad language (well, bad for basic cable TV anyway but certainly nothing worse than you'd hear on your average PG-13 movie) and fast action rolled out in quick succession along with the odd punchy one liner delivered with ease by lead star, Michael Chiklis.
Chiklis plays Detective Vic Mackey, a rough and ready cop who knows that the rules of the game have changed, and that in order to win against the bad guys, you have to get down and dirty, even if that means the odd bit of torture in the witness interrogation room (can anyone say Police Brutality?). Vic is not only a tough player in a tough world, but he also has a cheeky cheerful outlook on life and firmly believes that he is doing the right thing at the right time.
CCH Pounder also acquits herself exceptionally well as Chiklis's understanding colleague, Detective Claudette Wyms. Wyms also knows the rules have changed and although she can't seem to quite bring herself to Vic's level, she has no doubts that his method works. She may not know everything about Vic, and she may not agree with everything that he does. However she none the less understands fully why and wastes no time in informing her superiors that his way very often produces the required results.
Also added to the explosive series opener is stiff New Station Captain David Aceveda, played by Benito Martinez. Aceveda plays by different rules (he's a decent cop) and suspects that Vic is more dirty than not. Aceveda's personal mission is to bring Vic Mackey down. Suspecting that Vic is helping a big drug lord clear the streets of any competition, he orders an investigation into Vic's methods. However, even Aceveda is not above turning a blind eye once in a while and, as much as he hates himself, he'll let Vic loose as and when required, in order to help solve a missing child case.
Is Mackey dirty? Well, this is just one part of a multifaceted story that we'll hopefully get to see if the series runs it's currently allotted 13-week run. I, for one found the last five seconds of this eye-opener of a premier a total shock.
If you like you police dramas gritty as the asphalt you drive to work on, and just as rough, then The Shield' delivers. Many camera angles take a little getting used to but they seem to work and help set the overall atmosphere. The camera lenses also add an air of sharpness and paint the City Of Angeles in a new light. New views of LA that we very rarely get to see also help breath new life into the genre
Gone are the days of the likes of Quincy', Rockford Files' and poor old lamentable TJ Hooker'. The Shield' is the worthy successor to series such as Homicide'. Although I can see that the Family Values groups will be up in arms about this being another nail in the coffin for taste and decency, they should remember the V-Chip was developed for just such an eventuality (that and the Power-Off switch).
I heartily applaud FX for taking this bold move and hope they stick with Vic, Claudette and Captain Aceveda and tell it like it is.
It's a nasty world out there. The question is, do cops like Vic make it safer for us in the long term or not? Watch and find out!
My rating: 9/10 (Well, not everything can be in the same class as Six Feet Under'!)
Committed (1991)
Interesting premise, neatly executed
Just how does a nurse 'accidently' commit himself to a mental asylum? Well, the answer is provided early on in this interesting little movie, and from then on it begins to twist it's way to its perfunctory conclusion.
By no means a superb movie, it does however have several moments of good suspense. Based on the preface given at the start of the movie, this is a game of 'spot the real loony' amongst the assembled cast.
William Windom plays his part well, as the always ever so suspect Dr Quilly, whilst Robert Forester and Jennifer O'Neill both turn in nicely edgy performances the film requires.
The main disappointment was the fact that the film came to an end rather than a crescendo, but having said that it was nice to see the film did come to a fit and proper conclusion, leaving no-one in any doubt as to the final outcome.
It many ways, this movie reminds me of some of horror/suspense movies from the 60's and 70's, albeit sans blood. There are no big scenes here, no chases or 'heart in your mouth' suspense. Instead William A. Levey deals us with a pretty well told tale. True, it is not perfect but having said that, it is nonetheless more than acceptable.
If you've an hour and a half to spare and you see this appear on Cable, then I would defiantly recommended you sit down and give it a watch. Would I rent it on video? Possibly not. For me it's not that sort of material, nor would I imagine it would go down too well at the theater. But as a Saturday afternoon stocking filler, it fit's the bill quite nicely.
Final rating: 7/10
Battlefield Earth (2000)
Really bad movie [Contains spoilers]
***SPOILERS*** ***SPOILERS*** How anyone can class this movie as intelligent is beyond me.
First of all, let me start of by saying I love SF - it is without doubt one of my favorite genres.
So, to the movie...
The plot holes were more glaring than the sun over the Sahara Desert, the plot, camera work and editing as wandering as drunk after drinking a brewery dry, and the story line reminiscent of those really bad movies of the 50's.
So, what went wrong with the story...?
Let's see: Man, virtually repressed over 1000 years, manages to learn in 7-14 days how to read & write, disarm cruise missiles and fly advanced jet fighters. Meanwhile all-conquering aliens bicker and quibble like schoolgirls and don't even begin to question how repressed man can turn raw gold into perfectly shaped ingots with no visible means of doing so?
We are expected to believe that mankind in the 21st Century could do nothing to hurt the Psychlo's, and yet along comes Neanderthal man's third cousin and kicks some serious Pyschlo butt? Get outa here!
Oh, and I was so impressed about the incredible co-incidence that 'Appendix-A' just happened to be on the over-head projector. Not only that but it was the very same Appendix-A that they were looking for!
So, what other plot-holes were there: Well apart from the fact that Terl left the humans to fly around the country in the flyer, I can only assume he left them with the Military version of Rand-McNally. How else where they able to find Fort Knox and Fort Hood in Texas so easily? (I was surprised that there were any planes there at all-surely mankind would have used them all in fighting the Psychlo's in the first place-that or the wouldn't the Psychlo's had time to destroy every last remaining piece of firepower? After all, they've had a thousand years to do this)
It was also amazing to see that even after 1000 years, power still worked in Ft. Knox & Ft. Hood, that the planes were pretty much fueled up and ready to fly (obviously the tires were still at optimum pressure). The fact that at the end Terl was unable to do any more than lightly throttle Jonnie, rather than kill him also spoiled it for me. The bomb destruction of the Psychlo homeworld took an enormous amount of disbelief, but I could just about suspend mine for that sequence (the explosion itself was quite cool).
I watched this move with an open mind. I really hoped there might be some redeemable qualities, and there were, albeit few and far between. I am prepared to give many films a certain amount of latitude and excuse a few sequences in the name of poetic license, but this move really took credibility just way way too far.
The special effects were good, music passable and scenery pleasing to the eye. But that alone does not make a good move make.
If the purpose of a movie is to entertain, then I suppose it just about did that. But given the standard of films released in this day and age, and especially considering the pedigree of the production staff involved, it archived barely 2% of it's base potential.
Too all those people who said that they thought it was a good to excellent movie: You have my sympathies. You have obviously not been exposed to some really good (or even mediocre) films in your life. May I suggest you seek out some classics before making such comments again.
Sure, not every film needs to be, or should be, a Star Wars, CE3K or ET of it's time. But equally the film should respect it's audience and treat them with intelligence.
What on earth were John Travolta et al think when they were making this movie? 'Yeah, that's completely stupid, but the audience will buy it - they're stupid'. Well, Mr Travolta, got news for you: The vast majority of your audience were not stupid. That's why the Gross of the movie barely made back 50% of the budget...
The only reason I watched it was because it was on cable. I'm sure glad I didn't actually go and do something stupid like actually pay to rent this movie or something. Sheesh!
Perhaps one day it may become a cult move - the same way that Plan 9 from Outer Space is...
Two stars out of ten - and even then that's pushing it...
In short, it was pretty much an unmitigated disaster.