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The Avengers (2012)
1000 words isn't long enough!
Speaking as a fan of Iron Man and the rash of other constituent superhero films in the last few years AND a fan of The Avengers AND as a fan of Joss Whedon I can say that I was really pumped to see this film. Add to that the early reviews calling this film the greatest Superhero film of all time and I was ready to go.
Having seen it with a VERY participatory audience on Friday night I was blown away, Joss Whedon delivered on all the promises that had been made. But the BEST superhero film of all time? Really?
Well, I still think Watchmen deserve that particular honor. Realizing that I might have offended, well... everybody with that comment it must be said that there a couple of qualifiers here.
I think as a FILM discrete from any other films or comics (thus cutting out the graphic novel in Watchmen's case as well as the mountain of literature involving the Avengers and it's many characters) Watchmen takes it, its structure and tone are more adult oriented which lowered the box office figures and since the best cut of that movie is the director's cut that hurt it too, but I believe it is a better film.
Having said that and having gotten it out of the way I now proceed to what The Avengers brings to the table that makes this film MORE FUN than Watchmen. We add back in all the connections to movies and comics and POW, you have a mythos that everyone is aware of and has been awaiting for four years or more and The Avengers wins hands down just for its cultural impact. Everyone may not know who Doctor Manhattan is, but if you are reading this (or are breathing) you probably have heard of the Incredible Hulk or Iron Man.
One of the things I like about the Marvel universe is that the heroes in its world FIGHT EACH other. This is one of the reasons I was attracted to Watchmen
The Avengers themselves are directed to glory by Joss Whedon who had the overwhelming task of first making these guys fight each other and then come together as a team. This problem alone would have made most directors run away and hide under the bed but he does it. He is helped by the fact that he did not have to tell ONE SINGLE origin story, this had all been taken care of in the earlier movies. This also creates the disadvantage that the characters have to now meet each other and not bore the audience with redundancies. Not only that he does it without making the characters look silly or rather, more accurately, makes it so the silliness of a hammer throwing Norse god coming to blows with a soldier from World War II dressed in an American flag is not an obstacle but becomes the path to common ground.
The job of getting these guys to work together in the film falls to Nick Fury, played by an irreverent Samuel L. Jackson. One aspect of Fury's character is that being a spy/soldier this guy can look into his superior's faces and say "I understand you made a decision, but since it was a stupid ass decision I decided to ignore it". It is not hard to figure out why Nick Fury would be the one to be the one to conceive of the Avengers Initiative in the first place.
The group he gathers to save the Earth consists of an egomaniac, a megalomaniac Norse god, an old time American soldier with testosterone in abundance, a very hot girl who can get information out of anyone (and, it must be said should get her butt its own show) and last and certainly not least a guy who has "breathtaking anger management issues.
The actors also step up to the job as well and since my memory for actors' names is rather sketchy you'll forgive me for taking the quick route. Robert Downey Jr. is the same Iron man he's always been. The Hulk... well I'll save him for last. Thor manages to deliver one of the funniest lines in the film while simultaneously causing my wife to form a puddle of drool in her lap (the guy is FREAKING GOOD LOOKIN' what can I say?) which is okay because I was lovin' Scarlett what'sherface's Butt. Captain America makes up for the deficiencies of his origin movie by playing his role with a mixture of frustration at his circumstances and the loyalty of a soldier. There is also a star turn from Clark Gregg who acts in a redshirt capacity. Then there is Samuel L. Jackson who just has to stand there and look cool.
Now for the Hulk, I got excited originally because I am a fan of Edward Norton. I watched that movie because I was a fan of Edward Norton and when Avengers time came I expected Edward Norton to be there to round out a perfect cast. Instead I was informed that someone named Mark Ruffalo was taking his place. Now, while he did extremely well, I was waiting to see Edward Norton and Robert Downy Jr. play off each other, I think if there is one severe disappointment in the acting it is this one.
I began writing this review because fans, in the ebullience of the opening weekend, called this the best superhero film ever. I disagreed, here's how it breaks down.
Pure movie making (strictly movie to movie) goes to Watchmen Storytelling goes to Watchmen Beauty goes to Watchmen Mass appeal goes to the Avengers Pure fun goes to the Avengers Intellectual Satisfaction goes to Watchmen Action goes to the Avengers Character is a tie Pure satisfaction upon finishing the movie goes to the Avengers.
I think the Avengers wins.
Scott Pilgrim vs. the World (2010)
A simple story.. boy meets girl.. boy must defeat 7 evil exes
"Not so long ago...in the mysterious land...Of Toronto Canada...Scott Pilgrim was dating a high schooler..." This is a fairly innocuous opening for a movie that, if you like it, has the capacity to leave you very emotionally wrung out.
The plot of this movie is not exactly simple, but not incomprehensible either. Scott Pilgrim is dating Knives Chou, a Chinese high-school girl in an attempt to escape his loneliness following a brutal breakup. Scott is a slacker who lives with his "cool gay roommate" just across the street from his childhood home and is in a band called Sex Bob-omb which is involved in The Toronto Battle of the Bands. Things are going fairly well until
Life gets more complicated when Scott meets his (literal) dream girl Ramona and gets more and more entangled in a web of her baggage and his own.
About a half-hour into this movie Scott discovers he must defeat Ramona's seven evil exes and thus begins a strange odyssey across a video game landscape while also juggling his band, Knives, Ramona and the complexities of his own big ex showing up in the middle of it all.
After seeing this movie several times and seeing such bitterness on the message boards I can see how it might be hard for the average movie hunter to figure out whether they should spend their time here. The best way I can think of to guide the average moviegoer is through a series of negations. Number one: If you think the Legend of Zelda is an autobiography of the author of The Great Gatsby, then you may want to skip this one. Two, If you think that I am about to spell Mortal Kombat wrong then you may want to stay clear. Three, if you have trouble with movies that think realism is something that happens to other movies then you will want to stay FAAAAR away from this one. Four, if you don't like comic book type movies then you might want to steer clear because this film is very conscious of its graphic novel roots.
Lastly, and on a more serious note, if you think that post-modernism is a movie "Being weird for the sake of being weird" then you won't understand this movie and probably shouldn't even attempt it. This movie has more meta-jokes, gimmicks and effects then a movie with its premise has a real right to. That being said however, under all that there is a genuine story being told. The relationships become more and more complicated as the film goes on and in the end it is the characters that won me over and not the tricks.
If you have survived the above cuts and are still interested in seeing this movie then it is you
all seven of you evil-ex lovin' B@#$tards that this movie is for. Everyone else can go watch something else.
Two small things are worth mentioning as standing out for me. One, having had a nasty breakup in my own past (and it WAS brutal) I have never seen a movie that depicts the way guys feel when they are broken hearted. You sort of float along, people yell things at you, you sometimes forget where you are
I almost walked in front of a bus once. This film's first half hour or so hits this right on the nose. Another thing that relates to this is that it helps if you have been through a nasty breakup (not compulsory, but it helps) so the people on the forums who are watching this movie with their nine year old children should realize that, what with video game references that are from the 80's and early 90's and a rather adult (maybe not mature but adult) storyline, this probably means that prepubescent kids are NOT the target audience here.
Secondly, I hate Culkins, I have loathed them since Home Alone, so when I say that Kieran Culkin was the one I enjoyed the most (and I'm a big fan of Jason Schwartzman too) you can appreciate just how good he was in here. I hate that.
So, if you want to see a movie that's fun, has a story, is funny and filled with geek culture references (this movie should be required watching for ANY fan of The Big Bang Theory) and can stand a little blatant reality twisting, give this a try. Keep in mind though that it is not for everyone. It just was for me.
Note: This rating would be 9/10 but when I rented it from a company that shall remain nameless, the special features were listed but not accessible, movies that do this should be punished. If I had liked the movie less I would have removed two or possibly three stars but one will do here.
8/10
Avatar (2009)
A must SEE
Note: I am legally blind and cannot see 3-D, if you want to read about the 3-D aspects of this film you need to look elsewhere as I will not be commenting on them.
At the time of this writing there are 2566 reviews of this movie and it is the highest grossing movie of all time or somesuch so I'm actually a little intimidated by attempting to write a review of this one, but I'm going to write it anyway.
First things first, if your opinion of this movie involves the words "Animal sex/rape", please don't read this review, you are dismissed. If you haven't seen Avatar but you think Watchmen was about a "blue penis", you are similarly DISMISSED
Now that we have separated the wheat from the chaff we can actually discuss the merits of this film.
Let's start with the obvious, this movie is visually stunning but that's not a surprise. I think that this movie succeeds where a lot, nay MOST SF fails in that it creates a world that is truly alien while also being comprehensible. The visual effects needed to pull this off sometimes reach the point of overstimulation but that's OK. I say that's OK because if some filmmaker on another planet imagined Earth people on that planet might complain of overstimulation because our planet is a beautiful and diverse place.
Now the plot... what to say about the plot... Well, the plot is as basic as they come. There are a couple of reasons for this. First, when you create a world that's so alien you don't want to make the plot incomprehensible as well or the audience will leave - This was/is the problem with Futurama sometimes. Second, the plot is simple because it is a rehash of many other story ideas (see below) and most of those people knew how to tell a story. Third, the plot really only exists to embed his environmental message into the story. I'm not personally bothered by that.
Now I mentioned that there were a lot of rehashed ideas in this movie. It's true. Understand however that at this point in movie history (what with post-modernism being the currency of storytelling and all) MOST movies have a lot of rehashed ideas so I'm not insulting the movie on those grounds.
Some of the rehashed ideas are obvious: Without even trying one can see Dances With Wolves, The Emerald Forest, The End of the Spear, Silent Running and Dune. Less obvious ones include The Matrix, LotR, Jurassic Park and one that struck me out of nowhere: Apocalypse Now. That one actually requires explanation. The scene where Quaritch is drinking his coffee while bombing the indigenous people reminds me strongly of Kilgore.
This brings me to something I found interesting. I usually am the type who loves the big battles in a movie like Avatar. I love giant robots too, you could put a giant robot in a Sandra Bullock movie and I'd have to check that one out. In this case though, my favorite part of this film is act one where Jake is learning the ways of the Na'vi. I was actually rather disappointed when the fighting started. Disappointed and sad.. just sad. What can I say? Cameron's message worked on me.
So is this a good movie? Does it deserve to be #1? Well when I was young I saw Star Wars and as a result I found movies like The Hidden Fortress and The Seven Samurai. I hope that kids seeing this film go back and watch movies like The Emeral Forest. If even 1% of the viewers of this movie are as touched by it as I was by Star Wars, it's all worth it.
So, this film is awesome looking, its preachy message is a good one and there are giant robots and stuff. If you can see 3D I imagine this movie is THAT much better. I think the film is #1 because it deserves to be.
Oh, one more thing, the first time you see this one you may be tired out from the overstimulation mentioned earlier, most of the people I know liked it more the second time because they are not as overwhelmed, just a tip.
9/10
The Drawn Together Movie: The Movie! (2010)
Drawn Together R.I.P.
Note: I am legally blind and cannot see 3-D, if you want to read about the 3-D aspects of this film you need to look elsewhere as I will not be commenting on them.
I will begin this review by saying that if you don't know what Drawn Together is, you probably don't care much about this movie. If you are reading this because it popped up on your recommended list then you should go back and watch the series and THEN watch this movie.
Know this though, this show (including the uncensored movie) is raunchy, I mean RAUNCHY! If you have a weak stomach, if you think that South Park is stupid or should be taken off the air, you should avoid this show like the plague. It is not for you. As a matter of fact, If you are not in favor of censorship you may STILL have your convictions pushed to the edge. This is not a show for children or weaklings.
The plot of the series (if it can be said to have one) is simple: The first animated reality show. Cartoon characters of various kinds are brought to live in a Real World style house. The characters are archetypal cartoon types from a Pikachu-type battle monster to a Betty Boop knockoff. The thing that makes this show work (at least to me) is that these are the characters when they aren't being characters. In other words, If you can imagine Daffy Duck finishing a take, going home and indulging in all the debauchery that Hollywood offers, you are starting to see what this show is like. What emerges is a post-modern mix of the real world, The Real World, the cartoon world and a mix of any other cultural reference you can possibly think of.
"So that's the series?" I hear you saying, "You're supposed to be reviewing the movie!" Well yes I am, and That brings me here.
After Futurama showed that Direct to video movies could not only lend vitality to a canceled series but might actually have the ability to drag a show back on the air, it was natural that some of the other good shows that were canceled because of network bottom lines might make it back on the air as well.
Enter Drawn Together: The Movie
The Movie, a perfect example, this series was rated number one on college campuses across the country and was canceled anyhow. It could be said that this is because TV networks don't care about smart people. See? I just said it, so it can be said! This Direct to DVD movie takes the philosophical fight right to the producers. The Drawn Together Gang has to travel to Make-a-point land to get a point, because the racist/gay/violent/sexual humor of the show seems to have no point. Along the way they have a number of interesting moments (including a moment when the cast listens to the DVD commentary to escape a bad situation) and meet some strange (I mean REALLY strange) characters such as a very strange little girl and a giant that craps into his own mouth.
The only questions that really matter here are 1) Does the movie live up to the series 2) Can you sustain a show that usually has 22 minutes of content for an 80 minute movie. The most important question to the fans is "Can this movie bring Drawn Together back on the air?" The answer to the first two questions is a qualified "Yes". If you are a fan of this show you've probably watched Drawn Together episodes back to back on the DVDs, this just saves you from having to do that. As to the latter, the story actually does drag on a bit, however the writers seem perfectly aware of this - one of the characters even asks "Is there a Wrap-this-up-already land??" The answer to the third question is "NO". The movie is done in Flash which alienated some viewers. It needs to be said that the creators of Drawn Together were doing a movie for half the budget of one episode of the series and they did it fairly well. This was obviously done by the network (a network too cheap to provide 3-D glasses for a 3-D movie) to destroy the show forever.
I think they have, 80 minutes of writing on an 11 minute budget shows and the writers should not be blamed for it.
To end on a positive (kinda) note though, fans DO get closure in this movie, there is an end.
R.I.P. Drawn Together.
Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008)
It's all about Scope Here
I went to see this movie when it came out because it was a Star Wars movie. I didn't think, as so many of the reviewers seemed to, that this was going to be Episode 7, or even Episode 2.5. I knew that I was going to see a side project that was more about pretty pretty lights and big battle scenes and not so much about the Star Wars main storyline.
When I saw Star Wars in 1977 I not only became a fan for life, but also began a love affair with cinema in general although most of my childhood movie viewing was merely killing time until Star Wars and its sequels hit cable.
During this time I was drawn to epics mostly and I realized that most of the great epics have a great war in their history which defines them. Dune had the Butlerian Jihad, The Lord of the Rings had The War of the Last Alliance etc. For the Star Wars Universe this historic struggle was The Clone Wars.
Another thing about these past struggles is that if you do prequels that deal with them they SUCK! No one in the world is going to be happy with a prequel which deals with events that are mythic and galaxy wide in scope. I hold the opinion that by setting Episodes I, II, and III around The Clone Wars he killed any chance of a good reception to the prequels.
Despite the deluge of bad reviews for this film, it (and the subsequent series) does bring something to the Star Wars universe and that is the sense of scope that was lacking in the prequel trilogy. Freed from the constraints of telling "The tragedy of Darth Vader" we can now see more of this galaxy-wide and galaxy-changing war from the front lines. As an incidental benefit we get to see Anakin actually being a navigator on a spice freighter. I also find myself feeling differently about the Stormtroopers now. We also feel the sense of doom that many of these characters, including Anakin's new Padawan, will die horribly in the not too distant future.
Don't get me wrong here, the writing could be better and the character designs are just awful, Count Dooku in particular seems to be animated by someone who thinks Christopher Lee is the ugliest human being on Earth, but a 5.3 I think is a bit harsh.
My biggest tip if you haven't seen this yet is to not expect a Star Wars movie with an episode number and title because it's not claiming to be one.
There is one upside to everyone thinking this movie sucks. That is that the most unique sequence in the film (where our heroes climb a sheer cliff face while taking fire) will probably not be copied and used all over the place and will thus remain rather unique.
I give this movie a 7/10, average.
Futurama: Bender's Game (2008)
A Nice Return to Form
This last year has been one of redemption for several things that interest me. For instance, Chris Nolan followed the dubious "Batman Begins" with "The Dark Night, The Incredible Hulk was better than Ang Lee's version.
More than that though, there are three that stand out for me. WALL-E so outstripped Ratatoulle that that film went from a studio destroying nightmare to a slight misstep, Prince Caspian was a big improvement over The Lion, The Witch and the Wardrobe and Bender's Game turns the God-awful "Beast with a billion backs" into a misstep that can be overlooked a little more.
Don't get me wrong, BWAMB is probably not horrible, but I couldn't get it, there was just some bit of life experience I'm missing for that one to resonate with me.
On the other hand, I have played D&D and proved that D&D players can in fact get dates. or even wives. Because of this, this film got me right in the funny bone. They parody everything in here, the game, the controversy, the after school special on D&D which did nothing at the time except make the people involved look like complete idiots and the eating of strange things and drinking of soda.
It is noteworthy that if you have EVER heard the Deadale Wives do "Dungeons and Dragons" and laughed ("WHERE'S THE CHEETOS?? WHERE'S THE MOUNTAIN DEW????"), then this is the movie for you.
Even with all the love however it is my painful duty to inform you that this third movie does not and can not outshine Bender's Big Score. It's sad, but it's true. BBS had an emotional story that is replaced here by a series of more disconnected episodes.
One other thing, the first shot in the film was very familiar to me and it took me a long time to figure out because I hadn't seen the film in question in almost 20 years. I comes from an obscure little cable movie called Cloak and Dagger, another movie about RPG players. That just tells you that the writers know their history and I find that comforting.
There are a lot of parodies as you might expect from Futurama but they are finally doing parodies of stuff I wanted to see parodied which turns out pretty well for me.
In short Fans of D&D will like this one, fans of the epic film trend will like this one and people who like it when Futurama just abandons reality and continuity completely to let the pure art of the moment will like this one.
Final breakdown: Story: Good, not fantastic Laughs: Now it's just fantastic (If you get it and don't be afraid if you don't, there's a niche thing happening here so if you are not a nerd or geek of some kind then it's possible you may not get this one, but again, that's OK. Overall, It's a Futurama movie, not The Dark Night or something, it's above average.
Watch it, enjoy it and move on with your life.
Now we wait for the final film, which will decide it all.