catalog Reviews

The Last of the Mohicans (1992)

A Breathtaking Action Movie

[8/10 · 7 December 1999]

The Last of the Mohicans has some of the most beautiful scenery ever filmed. It also takes us to the time before the Revolutionary War. That doesn't mean it is boring. This isn't a Merchant-Ivory picture, this is a modern action movie that doesn't slow down once it starts rolling. Daniel Day-Lewis and Madeleine Stowe are thrown into the mix for beauty's sake, and they give strong performances as would-be lovers in a savage wilderness.

Historical inaccuracies pretty much run wild in this picture, but no one really cares because the action is so stirring and the sights are so gorgeous. In fact, the action and cinematography almost make up for the lame story, but not quite. But once again, who watches an action movie for plot?

Unless you are a hard-core historian who gives a rats behind about whether muskets could be used like sniper rifles, you will find The Last of the Mohicans to be a quality action picture.

New Nightmare (1994)

A Great Horror Film

[8/10 · 3 December 1999]

While I'm tempted to call this the best of the Nightmare movies, technically it's not part of the series. But without the Elm Street movies, this movie wouldn't exist. So is it part of the series? Who cares, my head hurts, and this is a great horror movie.

The concept of this movie is fresh and original. A demon that is usually trapped in the folk tales of humanity has been freed and is trying to break into our world. The demon thinks he's Freddy, so he's terrorizing the principal players from the original movie.

Wes Craven mixes this story with real-world mythology and fairy tales to paint a convincing picture that draws the viewer into the film. He also successfully "reworks" a lot of the scenes and ideas of the original Nightmare (melting stairs, tongue phone, Tina's death). It's also interesting to see how the people involved in the first film have evolved over the years. Heather Langenkamp has obviously grown as an actress, and Wes Craven has grown as a writer and a director.

I guess you could call this the definitive Nightmare movie. It contains a lot of in-jokes and references to the franchise, so fans and new viewers alike should like Wes Craven's New Nightmare.

End of Days (1999)

One of Arnold's Weaker Movies

[6/10 · 2 December 1999]

End of Days is probably not the comeback that Arnold Schwarzenegger wanted. While it isn't terrible, it isn't good either. Perhaps my expectations were too high for this movie, but I couldn't help but be disappointed.

First off, I'm not going to complain about the plot holes. You don't go to a Schwarzenegger movie and expect Citizen Kane. As long as the action flows along in a more or less logical fashion, I'm happy. That does not happen here. All of the action sequences are recycled from other movies that did them ten times better.

On the plus side, the special effects are nice to look at. Gabriel Byrne obviously has fun playing Satan. Everything looks nice and dark. Arnold almost saves the movie with his presence. He's got some nice one-liners, and he gets to do some actual "acting." Unfortunately, most of it is too little too late.

End of Days isn't a bad movie. Arnold fans like myself will still have a decent time, but it doesn't exactly evoke memories of T2 or Predator.

The Iron Giant (1999)

Great for Kids and Adults

[8/10 · 2 December 1999]

Why was this movie a flop in theaters? Probably because there wasn't a complete toy line, collectible card game, and Burger King tie-in to coincide with the release. It's really unfortunate too, because The Iron Giant is one of the few movies of recent years that is great for kids.

Blending traditional cel animation with a completely digital character (the Giant), this movie is a feast for the eyes. The story, while simple, contains so many levels that both children and adults will find something of interest. Children will react to the story of a small boy with a robot for a pal, while adults will see how the movie mocks the Cold War paranoia of the 50's.

There are no musical numbers. There are no talking bears or raccoons. Just a good story that is backed up with excellent animation and a big heart. This movie is one of the best animated movies of the decade, and hopefully audiences will discover it on video.

Freddy's Dead: The Final Nightmare (1991)

Easily the Worst of the Series

[3/10 · 30 November 1999]

This movie is just bad. Bad. Bad. Bad. Now that I've gotten that out of the way, I feel better. This movie is poor from beginning to end. The story is lame. The 3-D segment is really bad. Freddy is at his cartoon character worst. Thank God they killed him off. And who wants to see Roseanne and Tom Arnold cameos?

The only good thing in the movie is the little bit of backstory that we're given on Freddy. We see he once had a family, and we get to see his abusive, alcoholic father (Alice Cooper).

Other than that, all bad. There are some quality actors in here (Lisa Zane and Yaphet Kotto), and they do their best, but the end result is just so bad. The hour and a half I spent watching this movie is and hour and half I can't ever get back.

A Nightmare on Elm Street: The Dream Child (1989)

Freddy Comes Back...Again

[6/10 · 30 November 1999]

It's clear that the Nightmare filmmakers were running out of ideas when they got to #5. The premise of an in utero baby dreaming Freddy back up is pretty good, but basically the entire movie has kind of a been there, done that feel.

At least they brought back Alice (Lisa Wilcox). Not only does she try her best to wade through this mess of a story, but her character is one of the few that the audience was made to care about in the entire series.

Anyway, there's more teens to kill, and Freddy's always ready to step up to the plate. Thankfully, they finished the series with the next sequel. Unfortunately, this one looks like Shakespeare compared to Freddy's Dead.

A Nightmare on Elm Street 4: The Dream Master (1988)

Best of the Series

[7/10 · 30 November 1999]

Nightmare 4 is my favorite of the series (not including New Nightmare) for several reasons. Not only did it take the series in a new direction that was fresh, but it gave a good foil to Freddy. Lisa Wilcox gives an admirable performance as the Dream Master who takes on the powers, Mega-Man style, of all the kids Freddy has killed. She's also damn hot.

Renny Harlin also does a good job directing, using his style to inject some much needed life into an aging concept. All of the acting is a step up from previous efforts, and the special effects are no longer laughable. Freddy has become more of a cartoon character at this point, but giving him an interesting opponent helps to counteract this trend.

All in all, this is my favorite of the Nightmares. Although the series is really starting to show its age, this movie entertains from the beginning to the end.

A Nightmare on Elm Street 2: Freddy's Revenge (1985)

Almost the Worst of the Series

[4/10 · 30 November 1999]

Nightmare 2 is a very bad movie. It's not the worst of the series ( I reserve that distinction for Freddy's Dead), but it comes damn close.

I think it basically boils down to the studio trying to make a buck off the surprising popularity of the original. The principal problem with the story is that it breaks every rule set by the first movie and followed by every other movie in the series (including Freddy's Dead). Freddy was never meant to be in the real world. It's that simple.

However, there are some interesting things in this movie. The pool party sequence is interesting only because it proposes the question: what if Freddy faced off against twenty or so teenagers? That question is never answered, and the rest of the movie doesn't make much sense (why does Freddy kill the coach?).

I guess maybe die-hard fans of the series will find something worth watching, but Nightmare on Elm Street 2: Freddy's Revenge is more of a curiosity piece than anything else.

South Park: Bigger, Longer & Uncut (1999)

The Smartest and Funniest Comedy of 1999

[9/10 · 29 November 1999]

South Park: B, L & U is like a giant middle finger being flipped in the direction of the MPAA Ratings Board. That's what I loved about this movie: it points out the absurdity of the MPAA while entertaining you at the same time. The U.S. declares was on Canada. It's a musical. What more could you want?

Seriously, South Park is one of the best movies of the year. It takes all of the crudeness of the television series, turns it up about six notches, and delivers a thrill-ride of foul language, crude sex, and fourth graders out to save the world. Although it does have a huge amount of gross-out humor, it always feels savvy and satirical, and doesn't come off as cheap.

I went to this movie expecting a big screen version of the TV show, but instead I got a full-blown musical. All of the songs are funny, and they are directly aimed at the Disney animated musicals of recent years. Satan sings a song called "Up There" that mocks the Little Mermaid perfectly. All this makes it one of only two musicals that I can stand to watch (Blues Brothers being the other).

For adults who can stomach the foul language and general crudeness of the TV show, South Park: Bigger, Longer & Uncut comes highly recommended.

Dogma (1999)

An Original and Funny Picture

[8/10 · 29 November 1999]

Dogma has been the focus of a lot of protesting by religious zealots who feel the movie is anti-Christian. Nothing could be farther from the truth. Instead of focusing on a movie that deals with religion in a thoughtful and intelligent way, perhaps they should look at End of Days, which features Vatican assassins.

Anyway, Dogma is a very intelligent comedy from the mind of Kevin Smith. I have been a fan of Smith's since his breakthrough picture Clerks, and any Smith fan will not be disappointed with this film. Here, Smith tells the story of two fallen angels who are trying to find a way back into heaven and the people charged with stopping them. This very original concept is exploited in order to ask many questions about the nature of God and the nature of man. That and it contains the requisite (and always funny) "dick and fart" jokes.

Linda Fiorentino grounds the picture by giving a down-to-earth performance as the mortal who must stop the renegade angels. Jay and Silent Bob are along to help her, and as usual, are hilarious. I guess there really isn't anything bad to say about Dogma. Those easily offended or with closed minds may find much to complain about, but for those looking for something original that deals with religion honestly and humorously, give it a try.

A Nightmare on Elm Street 3: Dream Warriors (1987)

True to the Original

[6/10 · 29 November 1999]

Nightmare 3 picks up a few years after the events of the first movie while basically ignoring the disaster of a second movie. This picture is a big step up from the first sequel, but it still makes a lot of mistakes that also plagued the original movie.

It's nice to see Heather Langenkamp and John Saxon reprising their roles from the original Nightmare. They lend credibility to this sequel that was lacking in Part 2. Revealing more of the backstory of Freddy Krueger is also a nice touch. This one also contains, in my opinion, the most frightening nightmare of them all: the kid who is led puppet-style to his death by his veins and tendons.

Unfortunately, this movie also contains the series' penchant for terrible acting. The special effects are nice, and you can tell that they were starting to put some money into the production of these movies, but it still doesn't eclipse the original in terms of quality.

Still, this is a good entry in the series, and obviously enough people liked it to warrant producing a few more.

A Nightmare on Elm Street (1984)

Good Ideas, Poor Execution

[6/10 · 23 November 1999]

A Nightmare on Elm Street is one of the original horror movies. It contains some genuinely creepy moments, but looking at it now, it does show its age. It is a landmark film that helped usher in the "slasher age", but that doesn't make it a good movie.

The whole concept of a monster that kills people in their dreams is a wonderfully original idea, it's only too bad that the execution is less than stellar. Wes Craven was still in his directorial infancy here, and it shows. The terrible acting doesn't help matters, but the characters really don't have anything interesting to say, either. The ending drags the film down further by not giving the film a conclusion of any kind.

What's good about the picture is Freddy. Here he is a monster, plain and simple. No one-liners, just a cold-blooded killer out for revenge.

In short, this is a good movie from a historical perspective. Obviously, the concept of the series is sound in order to carry through six sequels, but the direction and poor acting drag down this particular effort.

Austin Powers: The Spy Who Shagged Me (1999)

Funny but flawed

[7/10 · 22 November 1999]

Austin Powers 2 is kind of a mixed bag. The original Austin Powers was a hilarious skewering of the James Bond series. Here they go for the "Something About Mary" approach and attempt to gross-out the audience. I enjoy toilet humor as much as the next guy, but it gets a little old after a while.

This movie does deliver some big laughs, however. The title sequence where Austin dances through a Hotel naked is pure genius. Dr. Evil steals the show once again with the biggest laughs, but even he wears thin after a while. And I guess that's the biggest problem with the movie. After a hilarious beginning it just slowly loses steam until there is little left.

Still, The Spy Who Shagged Me is not a bad movie by any means, but I hope if another sequel is ever made, the filmmakers will try to capture the humor of the original rather than relying on what Kevin Smith calls "dick and fart jokes."

The World Is Not Enough (1999)

Best of the Brosnan Bonds

[7/10 · 22 November 1999]

The World is Not Enough is the 19th installment of the James Bond series. Any wonder that the series is getting a little stale? That said, I wasn't disappointed after seeing this movie.

Does it rely on the old Bond formula? Absolutely. But although it doesn't break any new ground, it is entertaining nonetheless. Things blow up real good, nuclear physicists end up being beautiful women, more things blow up real good, Bond saves the world.

Unfortunately, the movie's best sequence is its first. The explosion at the MI6 headquarters and the subsequent boat chase down the Thames is rousing. The rest of the movie tries hard to keep the pace but never really succeeds. The ending is also rather abrupt, and Denise Richards as a nuclear physicist is stretching it, even for a Bond picture.

Fans of Bond will not be disappointed by this movie, but people looking for something other than exotic (and well done) stunt sequences should look elsewhere.

The Insider (1999)

Epic Drama

[8/10 · 8 November 1999]

The Insider is a fascinating look at the story of Jeffrey Wigand and how he revealed to the world that tobacco companies were lying about cigarettes. Russell Crowe gives a very good performance as Wigand, and you feel sorry for Wigand because he has sacrificed his career, family, and good name for a cause he believed in.

What keeps this two and a half hour epic from becoming boring is the quality of the acting throughout the picture. Even the least important characters are played well, except for that annoying Pepsi girl who plays one of Wigand's daughters. I couldn't watch her on screen without wanting to punch her in the face for those stupid commercials. But I digress.

Al Pacino gives an amazingly understated performance as the producer of 60 Minutes who gets Wigand's story on the air. After Mann's last collaboration with the actor on Heat, I expected a little more over-acting, but was pleasantly surprised.

The only fault of the movie is that it does run a bit long. Unnecessary scenes could have been cut to bring the run-time down, but it's obvious that Michael Mann believes in this material. In the end, The Insider is an involving movie that patient viewers will not be disappointed with.

Saving Private Ryan (1998)

The best movie I have ever seen

[10/10 · 8 November 1999]

Saving Private Ryan is the greatest movie I have ever seen. Period. Show me another movie that starts off with the most intense thirty minutes ever put on film. Show me another movie that entertains me for another two hours after that opening sequence. If you show me that, I'll show you some ocean-front property in Wisconsin. I have seen this movie several times now, and it never fails to move me.

The only thing I could possibly complain about is the sappy Grandpa frame story. It is completely unnecessary and contradicts the rest of the movie. But if that's all I've got to complain about, that's okay.

Spielberg has made THE masterpiece. But then again, every movie he makes should be a masterpiece. No one else has the funds or the creative freedom that he does. He should never, ever make a bad movie. Give me $100 million and free reign from the censors and I'll give you a watchable movie. Give it to Spielberg, and he'll give you Saving Private Ryan...or Hook (shudder). Let's hope the Hook days are behind us.

Bringing Out the Dead (1999)

Scorsese is the master

[9/10 · 25 October 1999]

Bringing Out the Dead is a much more conventional movie than I expected. That is not to say it is a bad film. In fact, in a year full of excellent movies, it still stands out as one of the best of 1999.

Scorsese is the best director working, bar none. Here, he injects his visual style into a story of a paramedic haunted by the people he has tried to help. Grim and gritty as it gets, this is an uplifting story that stays with you for some time.

I didn't expect the film to be as funny as it is. Dark humor abounds, and the musical soundtrack perfectly matches the mood and action on screen (another Scorsese trademark). The actors all do a fine job, with Nicolas Cage giving one of his best performances.

Bringing Out the Dead may not be one of Scorsese's best movies, but it is still better than 98% of the rest of the movies out there.

Spawn (1997)

The worst movie I have ever seen in the theater

[1/10 · 15 October 1999]

When this movie came out, I was a big fan of the comic. Therefore, I was looking forward to the movie. After seeing the movie, I wasn't even a fan of the comic anymore.

As soon as the movie started with its cheesy voice-over about "the war between heaven and hell", I wanted to walk out of the theater. I should have trusted my instincts. Poor acting, a stupid story, and so-so effects were what I endured for the next ninety minutes. In that time, I could have done something much more constructive, like staring at a blank wall.

After seeing Highlander 2 in the theater, I never thought I could find a movie as pitiful. Unfortunately, Spawn exceeds even that movie's stupidity to become the worst movie I have ever seen in a theater.

Three Kings (1999)

A genre-busting masterpiece

[10/10 · 4 October 1999]

Three Kings is a very original movie that took me by surprise. It's a mix of action, comedy, and political satire, all behind the guise of a caper movie. The trailers for the movie highlight the action sequences (which are excellent), but the ideas behind the action are what makes it a great movie.

It doesn't exploit the Arab people the way that most action movies do by making them the villains, rather it shows us that they are just people trying to live their lives like anyone else. And although the movie carries a moral message, it is never heavy-handed, but handled thoughtfully and intelligently.

I find it real hard to call a movie that stars both Marky Mark and Ice Cube the best of the year, but this may end up being just that.

The Matrix (1999)

Quality Filmmaking

[9/10 · 21 September 1999]

When I first saw the trailers for The Matrix, I had visions of Johnny Mnemonic 2. Fortunately this is not the case. While not being terribly original, The Matrix is a movie with interesting ideas, spectacular FX, and stunning action sequences. The Wachowski Bros. have quickly risen to the ranks of the best action directors, showing an eye for detail and quality that is on par with James Cameron.

I despise Keanu Reeves with every fiber of my being. That is why I am surprised by how much I like this movie. The rest of the cast does an admirable job in the acting department, and helps Reeves maintain a screen persona that does not make you want to throw up.

The Matrix is exciting, intelligent, beautiful, and one of the most entertaining movies of the last few years.

The Blair Witch Project (1999)

Truly Chilling

[9/10 · 9 August 1999]

This is the first movie in a long time to actually scare me. Any movie can go for cheap scares with things that jump out at you (Haunting remake), but thankfully Blair Witch doesn't do that. Instead, it created tension by NOT showing you what is terrorizing the main characters, and letting your imagination do the work. I found all of the actors very convincing, and the point-of-view camera work really puts you into the action. The last sequence, with its chilling final shot, is unequaled in all of movie history. This is truly a landmark film, something that must be seen in the theater, and shouldn't be missed by anyone.

Deep Blue Sea (1999)

Entertaining popcorn movie

[7/10 · 29 July 1999]

A mix of Jaws, Jurassic Park, Aliens, and countless other similar movies, Deep Blue Sea is a pretty dumb, but thoroughly entertaining movie. Who doesn't want to see sharks eating people? Not only that, but this movie has one of the biggest surprises in recent movies. I won't reveal it, of course, but I genuinely didn't see it coming. The biggest fault of the flick is the CG Sharks. They look pretty fake in most scenes. The animatronic sharks are flawless, however. Other than an over-reliance on slow-motion, there isn't much bad to say about the movie. It was entertaining, and as long as you don't expect anything cerebral, you won't be disappointed.