4/10
She wants out of one dynasty to join another.
28 March 2023
Warning: Spoilers
Cassidy/Kennedy, potatowe, potato, Onassis/Tomasis, tomatowe, tomato.

Perhaps not as scandalous as it was 45 years ago, this is still Hollywood trash at its most glamorous, but trash with glitz is still trash. Yet it's fun, but the viewer is likely to feel dirty still looking in at these so called fictional characters, knowing that it's really about an American dynasty that went through a lot of suffering with the assassination of its two golden boys and a Greek dynasty that had its share of scandal as well. In recalling seeing Anthony Quinn as the musical Zorba the Greek just a few years after this came out, I could see that he was obviously still playing Zorba in better clothes, especially as he starts to do the Greek traditional dance out of nowhere which he would repeat on Broadway stages just a few years later that he had already done in 1964 on screen. Quinn though is a mesmerizing actor regardless of how often he repeats these kind of roles, apparently being the first choice for the real Onassis to play him.

I didn't find Jacqueline Bisset to be anything like the other Jackie, and as much as I've liked her in other films, I found her completely bland, as if she was looking over her shoulder the entire time that someone from either of the families would show up to throw champagne in her face. It's awkward, and as a result, she lacks passion with both Quinn and James Franciscus, walking through the role of Cassidy/Kennedy. The assassination scene may be different than what happened in Dallas, but it's weakly done, and thus doesn't have any dramatic impact. Edward Albert, Charles Durning and Camilla Sparv do their best in supporting roles (with Sparv quite biting as Quinn's first wife), but where the passion should be it isn't, even when Bisset tosses Quinn out on their wedding night due to Sparv's continued presence. Beautiful settings and gowns aside, it's pretty dull and overly long, and ultimately it's more typhoon than tycoon, just a huge bag of wind that leaves a huge mess.
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