3/10
Deadest Horse-Beating-est Movie of All Time
17 June 2019
I hate this movie. I saw it for free and still want my money back. It is an absolutely pointless, meandering vanity project that attempts to trick you into thinking it's cleverer than it is. According to the director himself, it was designed to be a dumb movie comprised of dumb bits as a way to make money hanging out with his friends. And what's worse is that the trailer tricks you into thinking it is an entirely different movie - the worst kind of lie you can tell in an effort to lure people away from their hard-earned money and precious time.

There is literally no point to anything that happens; Jarmusch has no sense of pace or urgency or meaning. And in my opinion, art for the sake of itself alone is condescending towards your audience. I normally like his work, along with all of the actors, the subject matter and tone - this should have been right in my wheelhouse. But I left feeling like the director had a contemptuous view of the people watching his film (in EVERY regard) and that just doesn't sit well with me. Not everything has to matter in a movie, but SOMETHING should.

Ultimately, it felt like a third-rate SNL skit that was allowed to drag on for two hours.
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