First of all....I really wish there was a rating of zero, or even negative numbers because if any movie deserved a rating of negative stars, its this one. I was at a Comic Con and was sold a copy of this movie by the one of the principal actors. (apologies to Alexander Hamilton, I miss ya dude...sorry I wasted ya.) It is absolutely hilarious to read some of the reviews on here, suspend disbelief and pretend that those who apparently "loved" the film or "wanted more" because the movie was too short(my personal favorite has to be that it "exceeded my expectations"...might want to set your sites a little higher next time, bud) weren't being paid off for their time to write this tripe to help with sales or con the unsuspecting into seeing it. Misery loves company. This is one of those films where you will find yourself nudging the person next to you on the couch and saying "hey, wake up...something boring is happening." Where to start....the lead actor is made out to be a poor man's Val Kilmer (in his thinner days),and is just irresistible to the opposite sex for no apparent reason, ****ATTENTION**** here's your spoiler...the main female character is motivated to just jump in the sack for a romp with Iceman because the dude has his shirt off, laying in bed after suffering an injury and hell, nothing else to do so you might as well go for it....characters are introduced and then just disappear (first female you see in the movie...why was she necessary to the story? what was her relationship to the main character, friend, friend with benefits, agent, procurer?...no worries, she's never heard from again.) Hard to imagine this film getting a passing grade as a film school project, let alone a release intended for theaters. Edward D. Wood it ain't, but that's as high as the praise goes. Low production values, dialogue to set up actions by the principals that make as much sense as it does in a porn movie to motivate the character, synthetic actors, and there you have it. If you could dry this out and grind it into a fine powder, this steaming pile could fertilize your lawn. Don't waste your money, and keep 95 minutes of your life that could be put to productive use...unless you have insomnia or are a masochist. You can't help but feel stupider for having been involved.
Review of The Freemason
