Review of Salvage

Salvage (I) (2009)
4/10
incredibly mediocre
18 September 2013
Warning: Spoilers
"Salvage" is an adequate enough horror flick, but it's unmemorable and you promptly get the impression there are easily thirteen of derivative movies like this in a dozen. It can depend on a fair share of goodwill and enthusiasm from the entire cast and crew, but there undeniably are more flaws than trumps, including an incoherent and clichéd script as well as bland character drawings. The latter element really bothered me, in fact, because it makes the whole (already grotesque) script become completely implausible. In the very beginning of the film, a teenage girl talks about her mother like she's a careless and irresponsible tramp that has forsaken her poor and helpless little daughter. That image appears to be confirmed when we first see the mother, banging a random guy whose name she can't even remember, but then immediately after – and for the rest of the film – it turns out she's actually a very intelligent and courageous woman that risks her life multiple times in order to rescue her estranged daughter. What? That doesn't make any sense at all, and then I haven't mentioned the loud-mouthed chauvinist one-night-stand guy yet, who actually turns out to be a remorseful family man. But anyways, in the middle of their dispute, their street and pretty much the whole sleepy little coastal town, is brutally disturbed by heavily armed soldiers on a violent manhunt for something (or someone) terrifying. That same morning, a container washed ashore nearby and whatever creature or force that escaped from it is out on a bloody rampage. "Salvage" is quite similar to George A. Romero's classic "The Crazies", except that it has camouflaged soldiers instead of eerie men in white laboratory coats and a whole lot of redundant talking going on. There is a small handful of decent gore and blood-splattering moments to detect, but definitely not enough to satisfy the true gorehounds. Some of the footage is obviously meant to shock, but doesn't manage to do so (like the intro sequence, for example). There are most definitely worse ways to spend 80 minutes of your life, but I wouldn't immediately recommend "Salvage", neither. Always be wary of DVD-covers that shout out words like "instant cult classic" etc.
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