6/10
A Disney movie that gets half the job done
17 November 2012
Never in my life, even in the R-rated movies of Kevin Smith and Tarantino, have I heard the expression "what the hell?" been used so often and for such little reasoning. From the children in the pee-wee hockey team, from its headlining stars, to just plain background characters, it seems everyone has that same question on their mind.

Well, where the hell do I begin? The Mighty Ducks is an experiment done by Disney that was allegedly aimed to usher in a more tweenish fanbase than their animation studios, by providing a live action experience and a more mature feel. They succeeded in making a spontaneous, somewhat entertaining piece of nostalgia for the current generation of teens, but to be completely honest, this is one of the most vanilla sports movies I've sat through in my day, only elevated to being somewhat passable because of its efficient use of its star, Emilio Estevez (seeing this as a child, this was my introduction to the man who would later be one of my favorite male character actors) and its surprisingly successful array of motivational music, which make the cliché ending satisfying and memorable.

The story is paper thin, but works as some minor league, or pee-wee, entertainment. Estevez plays Gordon Bombay, an immensely cocky, successful defense attorney who has never lost a case in his life, but is sentenced to coach a team of young, misfit hockey players after being caught drunk driving. Bombay has had contention with the sport of hockey after he blew a title win in a penalty shot as a child, greatly putting his coach (Lane Smith) to shame.

Now, coaching the District Five team, Bombay is unmotivated and careless, until he sees these kids are genial and somewhat good-natured (and the fact that his old coach is still employed at their rival team), leading him to finally put effort into his work. He names the team the "Ducks," after the most noble creature in the wild, who travel in packs and stick by one another.

Estevez gives about the most entertaining performance one could bring to the table for this kind of movie. His character is a smart-ass, cut-throat, boisterous know-it-all, who winds up having his heart warmed by a group of helpless kids who don't take that much pride playing for the hockey team until he gets involved.

One of the downfalls of the children is that they are carbon-copies of the rambunctious tykes we see in so many movies, and any point at connecting or learning about one of them is especially moot. They are not interesting children, and even in a hundred and three minutes, we do not even get one as our surrogate to learn more about. Not to mention, the film is also about twenty minutes to long, thanks to a needless romantic subplot involving one of the children's mothers. The result is corny and usually unnecessary, but Estevez's chemistry with the mother, Heidi King, is just charming enough to make us somewhat care.

As simple, pleasant entertainment, obviously the film's main goal, The Mighty Ducks works just fine as basic and has competence to carry a long runtime. The problem lies in its screenplay, which is flat and unambitious. Even though it's branded with the Disney name, just a few years later, we were welcomed with the brilliant breath of fresh air which was Remember the Titans, so Disney clearly wasn't incapable of delivering the goods in a sports film. The slapstick-reliant humor is goofy, yet it works, Estevez is fitting in his role, and the ending with music dominated by Queen brings a smile even to a hard-headed cynic's face. It's a Disney movie that gets half the job done.

Starring: Emilio Estevez, Joss Ackland, Lane Smith, Heidi Kling, Josef Sommer, Joshua Jackson, Elden Henson, and Shaun Weiss. Directed by: Stephen Herek.
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