A pair of happy-go-lucky terminal cancer patients decide to go out with a bang (pun intended) by stealing an ambulance and making an unauthorized pilgrimage to the Amsterdam red-light meat markets, where they connect with two women more than willing to be regarded solely as sex toys. The whole sorry mess resembles the wet dream of a dying screenwriter (with second thoughts, naturally, at the moment of truth); certainly the desperate show of good spirits by Timothy Dalton (exercising his license to ham) is only a slight improvement over flatulence jokes made at the expense of a brain-dead human cabbage. All the usual buddy-film clichés are supplemented by a mixture of cloying sentiment, annoying self-pity, low humor, and high hormones; a few cold showers would have been equally as life embracing. But let's not be too critical: there are, at least, some pleasantly scenic shots of windmills and tulips to help pass the time.
