I did get paid to script-doctor "Red Serpent." It "starred" Roy Scheider (before he died; although that could've been optional I think). They flew him into Moscow for two days and had him read lines off a cue card into a cell phone in front of the Kremlin.
Then I got a call to script-doctor the project. My assignment: "We don't want this to be too 'Russian.'" Notice I'm not in the credits. As a Script Doctor, that's not how it works usually. It's a day-job with no credits or residuals. (Damn! If I got residuals I could probably SuperSize at McDonald's some day!) But it was worse -- 2 hours worse -- before I got it.
Half of it had been shot (all of the Scheider scenes and most of the action stuff). I contributed to pasting the existing stuff into something vaguely coherent. I was not entirely successful in that enterprise.
Plot holes! I scoff at plot holes! They gave me plot canyons! 'Cause y'know, an hour of Roy Scheider talking into a cell phone with the Kremlin looming in the background and everyone else in the cast (except for Michael Pare) reading their lines phonetically with heavy Russian accents... it's one of my prouder moments and actually paid the rent for most of a year.
And you shoulda seen some of the pages that didn't make the final cut! I tell ya, it had a chance to be really really.... not awful.
Not really.
Then I got a call to script-doctor the project. My assignment: "We don't want this to be too 'Russian.'" Notice I'm not in the credits. As a Script Doctor, that's not how it works usually. It's a day-job with no credits or residuals. (Damn! If I got residuals I could probably SuperSize at McDonald's some day!) But it was worse -- 2 hours worse -- before I got it.
Half of it had been shot (all of the Scheider scenes and most of the action stuff). I contributed to pasting the existing stuff into something vaguely coherent. I was not entirely successful in that enterprise.
Plot holes! I scoff at plot holes! They gave me plot canyons! 'Cause y'know, an hour of Roy Scheider talking into a cell phone with the Kremlin looming in the background and everyone else in the cast (except for Michael Pare) reading their lines phonetically with heavy Russian accents... it's one of my prouder moments and actually paid the rent for most of a year.
And you shoulda seen some of the pages that didn't make the final cut! I tell ya, it had a chance to be really really.... not awful.
Not really.