The first FEAST was a wonderfully over-the-top riot, which was disgusting and wild while still offering an engrossing plot, interesting characters, and enough thrills to become something more than just another gross-out monster movie. It was easily one of my favorite genre films of the past several years.
Sadly, FEAST II is the polar opposite from beginning to end - an embarrassing pile of unentertaining garbage from a crew that obviously had the potential to make something great.
I picture the pitch meeting for FEAST II going something like this:
STUDIO EXEC: So, you want to make a sequel to FEAST? What have you got?
GULAGER: Well, the monsters had huge penises in the first one, why don't we just go with that?
STUDIO EXEC: But... uh... that wasn't... the only plot point.
GULAGER: But if we put more penises in the sequel, it'll be... EXTREME!
STUDIO EXEC: I don't follow you.
GULAGER: ...And baby eating! And melting old people! And vomit! And naked midgets! And pee! And cat raping! Horror fans love that kind of crap!
STUDIO EXEC: But don't they generally like being scared?
GULAGER: Nah! If we throw in an all-girl biker gang and bring my dad back from the dead, it'll be cool.
STUDIO EXEC: My god. That's just insane enough to work.
But it isn't. At all.
The movie is a colossal mess on almost every level, from the ill-contrived jokes to the anti-ending, seemingly placed there to chide you for sitting through the entire film. The director's girlfriend returns for no reason other than to be on-set with him, they cleverly place a huge log in the toilet during a bathroom fight scene (Ooh! Edgy and funny!), and the movie's bluescreen effects are on-par with those of a middle-American meteorologist's weather panel. Why didn't they just film the movie on a REAL ROOFTOP?! Ugh!
The director has stated repeatedly that he wanted to make something even more over-the-top than the first FEAST, but now seems upset that nobody else finds his immature sense of humor even remotely entertaining. he showed such great potential in FEAST, and I rooted for him during all of Project Greenlight. Why is this where he went next?
As a lifelong horror fan, I've seen my fair share of shocks, and nothing in this mess is there for any reason but the cheapest of cheap shocks. Eating a baby and raping a cat? Come on, guys. That's the best gag you could come up with? Its not offensive or shocking. It just feels... cheap.
I expect FEAST III to go out of its way to break even more taboos, but I won't be along for the ride. In the running time of just one sequel, FEAST's makers somehow went from one of the most hilariously fun, daring horror films to a piece of Troma-grade trash.
Next time, get your heads out of the third-grade gutter. We want horror, not barf jokes.
Sadly, FEAST II is the polar opposite from beginning to end - an embarrassing pile of unentertaining garbage from a crew that obviously had the potential to make something great.
I picture the pitch meeting for FEAST II going something like this:
STUDIO EXEC: So, you want to make a sequel to FEAST? What have you got?
GULAGER: Well, the monsters had huge penises in the first one, why don't we just go with that?
STUDIO EXEC: But... uh... that wasn't... the only plot point.
GULAGER: But if we put more penises in the sequel, it'll be... EXTREME!
STUDIO EXEC: I don't follow you.
GULAGER: ...And baby eating! And melting old people! And vomit! And naked midgets! And pee! And cat raping! Horror fans love that kind of crap!
STUDIO EXEC: But don't they generally like being scared?
GULAGER: Nah! If we throw in an all-girl biker gang and bring my dad back from the dead, it'll be cool.
STUDIO EXEC: My god. That's just insane enough to work.
But it isn't. At all.
The movie is a colossal mess on almost every level, from the ill-contrived jokes to the anti-ending, seemingly placed there to chide you for sitting through the entire film. The director's girlfriend returns for no reason other than to be on-set with him, they cleverly place a huge log in the toilet during a bathroom fight scene (Ooh! Edgy and funny!), and the movie's bluescreen effects are on-par with those of a middle-American meteorologist's weather panel. Why didn't they just film the movie on a REAL ROOFTOP?! Ugh!
The director has stated repeatedly that he wanted to make something even more over-the-top than the first FEAST, but now seems upset that nobody else finds his immature sense of humor even remotely entertaining. he showed such great potential in FEAST, and I rooted for him during all of Project Greenlight. Why is this where he went next?
As a lifelong horror fan, I've seen my fair share of shocks, and nothing in this mess is there for any reason but the cheapest of cheap shocks. Eating a baby and raping a cat? Come on, guys. That's the best gag you could come up with? Its not offensive or shocking. It just feels... cheap.
I expect FEAST III to go out of its way to break even more taboos, but I won't be along for the ride. In the running time of just one sequel, FEAST's makers somehow went from one of the most hilariously fun, daring horror films to a piece of Troma-grade trash.
Next time, get your heads out of the third-grade gutter. We want horror, not barf jokes.