Demonic Toys (1992 Video)
4/10
Not The Awesome Film You Remember It Being
15 July 2008
A police bust goes awry, resulting in the death of a police officer. His partner (Tracy Scoggins) chases the killers to a warehouse full of toys, but she doesn't know that tonight the toys will awaken and be filled with diabolic spirits. Along with a fast food delivery driver and a bumbling security guard, can she defeat the toys and Satan or will the demon achieve his highest goal -- being born into a human host?

Full Moon films aren't really known for being awesome, and this film is no exception. It's slow, focuses too little on the toys and returns to a dream sequence more times than is really necessary. Focusing on the toys more may not be a wise idea, though, because with one or two exceptions, John Buechler's creations are little more than well-crafted hand puppets. Two drunk kids with the proper equipment could have made this film, and probably have done better. (The only toy that was cool was Baby Oopsie Daisy.)

The cast was alright, even though the acting was more or less worthless. The male police officer was played by an atrocious actor, so his untimely death was a welcome addition to the film. And the hairstyles of the early 1990s pretty much guaranteed that none of the cast involved was attractive to look at. Sure, Miss July (Kristine Rose) was respectably hot, but I wasn't convinced. And I thought the homeless girl (Ellen Dunning) had a very Mandy Mooresque voice and face, which kept my heart beating rapidly. But still not good enough.

I'd like to say it's a good film by Full Moon standards and by the fact that this was the director's first picture. But that's no excuse and really not true. Full Moon pumps out sludge better than this all the time... although after seeing "Gingerdead Man", I can assure you they also make much worse.

There's no good reason to rent or buy this film. If you're trying to bring back memories of your childhood, you're probably better off just sticking to the memories. This film will crush them and leave you crying and soulless. Just because "Puppet Master" is possibly a winner (see separate review) and "Child's Play" is a winner, combining the two doesn't ensure a winner if it's handled by no-talent hacks.
3 out of 8 found this helpful. Was this review helpful? Sign in to vote.
Permalink

Recently Viewed