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Brutal-bob
Reviews
The Great American Snuff Film (2004)
NEW LOWS IN Film-making!!!
Horrible acting.. rigid and without a single strand of imagination or panache. But more horrible than the acting is the sound. I played this thru my surround sound and it sounded like the Dx was recorder thru a bullhorn at the airport. The cinematography is creative for what it is..which basically is video. But that is where it ends on any sort of creative level
. The story is non-existent and the so-called gruesome violence is horrendously dull which makes this film experience extremely tedious... OK, these so-called killers are set up to be so psycho and inbred.. yet the girls keep their clothes on thru out the whole damn thing.. come on, were the two psychos gay?? Was this an attempt at a horror version of Brokeback Mountain? All the scenes draaaaaaag on and on and on and on.. the blame for that is that the so-called director is also a wanna-be editor.. an awful idea all together. The film has no pace and no plot that engages you to any sorta level even boredom. The violence is at a kindergarten level.. chicks in cages being burned with fake cigarettes don't cut it. It's phony and feels PG-13 which is too bad cause with the right execution it could have been done disturbing as all hell. When you have untalented amateurs doing the job then this is what you will end up with - a pointless dreary mess that will make you YAWN while your ears are bleeding. Please someone out there hear our pleading cries and take away this filmmakers camera before he attempts another merciless waste of time.
Shooting Gallery (2005)
would have been better without Mr. cardboard cutout Prinze
it had potential.. the story had legs.. Ving is always good.. everyone loves him in BABY BOY.. what makes this movie almost like going to the dentist for a root canal is Freddie.. he is so wooden that every time Ving light up I'm worried that he will burst into flames. Apart from the lead actor I dug the film.. which is weird cause he is in it a lot.. everyone loves movies about hustles and money and shady people... but it is hard to care when you wish they would just cap the lead cause his acting is giving you a headache. This is where Hollywood casts a person because of what they are worth not for what they can do and therefore they end up with a tame lame straight to video film instead of a bad mofo of a movie.. Hollywood please commit to what you are doing.. if you are gonna make a bad guy movie cast people that we believe can be bad guys... what's next? Justin Timberlake as a thug?? Oh no, it is ..isn't it??
Waiting... (2005)
sucked!
Ryan Reynolds is a good actor.. so why would he even bother with this boooooring toilet humor crap?? The only people that go to corporate restaurants are morons.. they deserve to have some uneducated bum jerk off in their food. The only people that would actually work in a corporate restaurant are even bigger morons than the once eating there... I should tip you for doing the job you got hired to do?? I should hand you money cause you refilled my drink 3 times and asked me a trillion times if I was alright and if everything was good.. scam of a lifetime... scam of a lifetime by the way is Dane Cook... His stand up CD's are funny as all hell.. but then when he tries to act..he kills the whole illusion. On SNL he was so bad I had to take shots of Nyquil just to be able to stay calm. In this stinking pile of horse poo-poo he out stinks them all.
Thank you I will be here all week..please try the veal!
Dirty Love (2005)
Fine Jenny $1 billion if she tries to act again
this movie was as bad as they come.. and the bad wasn't even a good bad.. it was a straight up horrible flat line bad. I saw it for free but thru the whole thing I was feeling horrible for the poor bastard that actually paid anything to see this..even if it was some lint out of his belly button. Anyone seen "Skyscraper" with Anna Nicole Smith?? that movie was sooo bad it was good.. that movie looks like an Oscar winner next to Dirty Love.. if it was legal to shoot people then the director should get two to skull just to assure us that he never steps anywhere near a camera again... I beg.. OH, BEG!!!!!!!! PLEASE JENNY AND MR. TALENTLESS DIRECTOR DO NOT Attempt TO MAKE ANOTHER FILM.. OR EVEN A HOME VIDEO... you two would probably even make a bad porn movie...