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The Heat (2013)
Dreadfully unfunny comedy
With a script totally devoid of any humour or wit, Melissa McCarthy is even more insufferable than usual. Whenever a film with her has been half-decent it's because the rest of the cast cover for her.
Sandra Bullock seems embarrassed to be part of this mess of a film. The chemistry between the two leads is completely missing.
I often wonder where the rave reviews come from. Comedy is subjective and so much of the films seems improvised but not in a good way or it's just terrible acting (probably this). Scenes drag on that should have been truncated minutes ago.
Couldn't finish it. It's that bad.
The King's Man (2021)
Decent but way below the previous two films
The problem this film faces is it's going to be compared to the two previous Kingsman films. This film's tone is very different and is its major issue. It lacks the lightness of touch and the subtle comedy of its predecessors and their great action sequences.
It' extremely well made for the most parts, as you'd expect from Matthew Vaughn, but let's forget the Rasputin fight scenes which are just dreadful and totally out of character with the rest of the film.
As a contrast, the WW1 scenes were superbly handled. The film itself seemed better when it was freed from its narrative constraints. I want to avoid spoilers here.
Prequals seldom work well and that's the case here.
Decent but lacking that sparkle that made the previous films so entertaining.
Kateo (2022)
Absolutely outstanding action let down by mediocre plotting and acting
If you're an action film fan watch this. The action is superb and I mean it. Very long sequences done as single shot action and its superb, violent and bonkers at the same time. Some of the camera movements are off the chart.
However, the film is let down by some dodgy acting, a bit of cheap cgi, way overlong in the 'dramatic plot' bits and ,strangely, some dodgy camera work in them.
Shot as a 'one take' movie but the director just gave up in the drama segments not even hiding the 'cuts' and saved his budget for the action. And what action it is!
Grab a beer or two and watch it for the truly sublime and, yes, bonkers action.
I hope action fans discover this and ignore the seriously low rating.
This is a film for action fans.
Ninja: Shadow of a Tear (2013)
Superb Fights and that's what matters in a martial arts movie
Surprisingly low-rated considering just how good the action is.
Scott Adkin's best film by a mile. Take a chance on this ! It REALLY is good if you like Martial Arts films.
Outstanding fights and there's plenty of them courtesy of director Isaac Florentine and the massively under-rated fight chorographer Tim Man.
Tim Man's trade-mark is long fights without edits and here he delivers in spades.
Scott Adkins has never been better as a man revenging, his fight skills perfectly match the talent behind the camera.
Simplistic plot with LOTS of excellently choreographed fights that are very well executed.
Have a beer and just smile.
The Great Escapists (2021)
Dreadful - misguided at best
Producers need to read the scripts before junk like this is ever given the green light.
Just because he's a presenter of The Grand Tour and it brings in subscribers, shouldn't mean he can output rubbish like this.
The audience for this seems to be the 10/10 new accounts with one review... hmm.
Gisaengchung (2019)
Outstanding piece of cinema
Parasite thoroughly deserved the best picture Oscar and for once in a long time it's a winner that will be remembered as a classic. It's a master class in film making!
Don't read reviews or a synopsis, just watch the magnificence unfold before your eyes.
Manyeo (2018)
Ending is way better than the first three quarters
As usual there's a huge number of 9 or 10 star reviews from single review accounts trying to boost the rating.
Don't be fooled! Great ending but the rest is slow and derivative.
Very slow to build to anything. The first hour could be easily cut to 30 mins or less to improve pacing without losing anything and would definitely improve the story of the two school girls. It's quite tiresome and childish at times.
Reviewers seem to praise the action but there is very little action and the plot expositions near the end should have been the meat of the movie.
However...
The end action sequence is superbly put together, decently long, violent and entertaining. Action fans should watch it for this alone on a streaming service.
If there's ever a 'Part 2' and it carries on in the style of the ending it'd be a a truly great action film.
Roma (2018)
Dull as the dishwater you keep having to view
The camera pans watching someone do chores.
The camera pans watching someone clean.
The camera pans watching someone washing clothes.
The camera pans watching someone washing up.
The camera pans watching someone walk around.
The camera pans watching someone etc
The camera pans watching someone ad nauseum
Looks pretty, but wow is it boring with nothing happening. Ever.
Alfonso Cuarón please return to REAL film making!!!
The Incredibles (2004)
Truly Outstanding
My favourite animated film by far.
Smart, intelligent and just incredible fun on so many levels.
BuyBust (2018)
Dreadful action film
There's plenty of incredibly badly choreographed action in this non-stop action snooze-fest and that's all it has to recommend it. OK, it does have one long-take that passes for reasonable but that's probably because the rest is just so shockingly bad.
Reviews are comparing it to the Raid films. Don't believe them. The director of this is talentless compared to The Raid films' Gareth Evans and his incredible crew of stuntmen.
Give it a miss.
A Simple Favor (2018)
Sub par mis-match of genres
A supposed comedy mixed in with a thriller. Not even close on either.
Terrible comedy, some bad acting and awful 'twists' make for a strained viewing experience
Looks like the 10/10 reviews are the usual 1 review 'new' accounts boosting the rating.
Watch something else.
The Predator (2018)
Such a waste of talent
Shane Black and Fred Dekker writing a new Predator movie which on paper should be movie gold. Sadly the paper to screen process went badly wrong.
I'll keep it short. Some parts good, others dire.
A disappointing experience overall.
Tomorrowland (2015)
Great fun and exceptionally well made - just the ending lets it down.
Another gem by Brad Bird although marred by a lacklustre ending.
Action galore and a well crafted plot that keeps you guessing what's really happening. It's also incredibly violent by Disney standards so I'm surprised they didn't release it on one of their other labels.
Action fans really need to give it a go even though it's a "Disney" film. If you didn't see the famous logo at the start, you'd have no idea.
Mile 22 (2018)
Pathetic piece of film-making with incoherent editing and dire shaky cam work.
I thought the low reviews were probably being harsh until I watched it... it's worse than they suggest.
No point in mentioning the plot. The film is an exercise in excruciatingly bad film-making. Film schools need to use this as a lesson in how not to make a movie.
Shocking shaky-cam cinematography. It bounces everywhere. All. The. Time.
Editing is truly HORRENDOUS. It is impossible to follow anything that is going on as cuts happen 3 to 4 times a second in the action sequences and if you're lucky in the non-action scenes you might get a 2 second cut that shakes all over in a frantic attempt to look exciting. It doesn't.
What's worse is there is no continuity between the cuts eg 'the hero' gets hit by a person from his left. The next cut is of the same two fighters but from the other side so the hero gets hit from the right BY THE SAME PERSON!
Editing 101 says that's generally a very bad idea especially when it's in an edit that's a third of a second and then keep doing it from different camera positions, means the action is totally incoherent.
Add to this, seemingly random fast cuts of security cams and 'support agents' and screens with health monitors... It's a complete mess.
Hint to directors: let Iko Uwais control his own fight scenes. Do NOT mess with what he says - do not over edit!!!
If you want a recent action film that gets it right try 'The Night Comes for Us' also with Iko Uwais and see the difference.
The Night Comes for Us (2018)
Superb ultra violent action movie
Bucket loads of incredibly well choreographed action and stupendously violent.
Just what fans of this genre want!
Other action movies give us 2-3 minutes for an 'action scene'. This gives us 25 minutes of continuous multi inter-cut action scenes and that's before we're a third of the way through the movie! AWESOME!
It keeps delivering with action scene after action scene.
Plot is there simply to drive the action, but at least it's somewhat passable. Although who really cares in this sort of movie?
The film exists purely for film fans who love adrenaline filled action.
If that's you, DO NOT MISS THIS TREAT!
Ocean's Eight (2018)
Coco the Clown did the makeup!
Actually better than the reviews suggested, although it would have struggled to be worse.
Hopefully this stops the 'all female' remakes or at least forces studios to use far better scripts and plot devices.
The long runtime is heavily padded with a roving camera set to music which mostly adds nothing the plot or dramatic process.
Considering it's supposed to be a complex heist, it's shockingly simple. The 'twist'... oh well.
As for the title of this review, the make-up department needs to re-evaluate what it's doing! Panda eyes on all the main cast. More foundation than a hi-rise building!
So much make up was used that Coco the Clown would look under painted.
Kiss Kiss Bang Bang (2005)
Nowhere near as smart as it seems to think it is and worse, it's boringly bad.
After numerous successful scripts that sold for increasingly high amounts, Shane Black writes and directs this.
It goes to show that you need someone to say "No, this really isn't good. It's self indulgent, pretentious rubbish. Make changes". Sadly no one did.
Shane Black 'retired' for a number of years after this. Probably sat down and watched it! Talent when given a free reign can often go awry. It did here and embarrassingly so.
Thankfully he's returned to the industry as he's clearly talented and the more recent Good Guys was a return to form.
Fingers crossed the upcoming Predator co-written with Fred Dekker gets back to their magic of the Monster Club.
Hannah Gadsby: Nanette (2018)
The Emperor's New Clothes
Oh, how the gullible have been bitten. This is terrible.
The first 'stand up' I've seen from Hannah Gadsby and it certainly can't be classed as comedy which so many media outlets are promoting it as. Comedy should make you laugh. This doesn't. At all.
A rambling, preachy lecture with her giggling to signal to the converted when to laugh.
Sensible people already know what she's preaching, those that don't won't be converted. The content simply isn't smart enough or delivered in a manner to do so.
Avengers: Infinity War (2018)
An excellent movie from the Marvel stable
It's been hyped as good and surprisingly it actually lives up to it.
Marvel have brought many stories and characters together into this film to provide a VERY entertaining romp.
It's hugely dependent on the action and CGI and thankfully these are superbly handled as befits its astonishingly high budget. Although Spiderman in his first few swings still isn't quite right. Luckily, just like the last Spiderman movie it sorts itself out (is this an in-joke?).
A nice simple story with a decent number of cracking one-liners built into a very adept script, allows the action to proceed with aplomb into its numerous excellent set-pieces.
Great fun. More please!
Masters of Horror: Pelts (2006)
Argento fails to be Argento - Dire
As a long time fan of Argento with his extremely stylish often ludicrously plotted films he frequently created some weird and brilliant cinematic moments in 'horror' film history. Admittedly, there were many moments where the brilliance didn't shine and even the most ardent fan will begrudgingly admit most of his films haven't aged too well. However, the sheer power of his set pieces and exquisite use of the cinematic medium in them more than compensates.
Sadly, Pelts isn't vintage Argento. Not even close. In fact it's dreadful.
You could show it to any Argento fan and they wouldn't recognise it as his work. Laboured, perfunctory direction at best and mainly not even that!. Any old hack could do it, and what's worse, probably better.
Excellent special effects though and the sole reason for the 3 stars.
Power Rangers (2017)
Decent reboot. Midless fun and it knows it.
Way too many comments on here hark back to loving the simply dreadful TV series and then slam this. Ahh the rose tints...
It's actually a fun reboot. Solid effects across the board which you can't say of most of the current crop of super hero movies.
There's some sludgy dialogue supporting the 'outcasts' for various reason ie your typical teen stuff.
However, it mostly achieves its aim, admittedly a rather simplistic one, to entertain and it does that! That's why we watch movies.
A couple of beers on a Saturday night and it'll go down a treat. Great mindless fun!
Hobo with a Shotgun (2011)
Inept beyond belief piece of film-making.
The sad part is, reviewers are actually buying into the fact it's supposed to be bad. Having a 1 minute joke-ette in Grindhouse and expanding to feature length fails completely.
Dreadful film-making. Absolutely incompetent.
Everything about this film is so incredibly sub-standard it beggars belief.
The camera operator appears never to have a held a camera before.
Actors that have never acted before.
etc etc.
Avoid, unless of cause you don't know what film-making is.
My first time giving a 1 star rating. It will be hard to find a worse movie this decade!
Bright (2017)
Great FUN and way better than the reviews suggest
An old fashioned style action buddy cop movie with the twist that orcs, elves magic etc exist in the current world and living together, if not in total harmony.
It's just plain old fashioned FUN. It's obviously an action comedy at heart, yet critics seemed to slam it because it didn't tackle more complex subjects its premise could have used... erm OK .
Critics need to lighten up and have some fun, which this provides in spades.
I'd rather watch a sequel to this than the next 'super hero' dross that Hollywood will dish up.
Justice League (2017)
Another dud
More overblown action with some surprisingly bad cgi towards the end.
Terrible plot: yes,
Terrible Acting: yes,
Ultra terrible script : double yes,
Terrible.... just about everything
The effects when good were actually very good. The film's saving grace.
Keep Batman out of these superhero ensembles. He should exist a more grounded world without everyone having superpowers. Christopher Nolan's films had the right balance. Studios ruin a good franchise! No surprise.
Molly's Game (2017)
Very Entertaining
A very polished script as usual from Aaron Sorkin, in his directorial debut, that allows the actors to shine.
Well worthy of your time.