Change Your Image
Beowolf2001
Reviews
Day of the Dead 2: Contagium (2005)
Why do I do this to myself?
I am a zombie aficionado. Unfortunately, most zombie films stink. This is pure and simple fact. So now I've watched Contagium (I refuse to honor it with a Day of the Dead sub title, since it doesn't deserve it and is in no way connected with George Romero) and The Dead Next Door in the same week. Well, thats about three hours of my life wasted. This was simply a crappy, bad film. While it had better production values than say, any Italian Giallo Zombie film of the 80's and left crap by J.P. Bookwalter and Todd Sheets in the dust, it was still garbage. The writers didn't know if they wanted to make a Romero type Zombie film or a Return of the Living Dead Zombie film, so the zombies bounce back and forth between the two. The lame opening tries to tie this craporama in with the Romero films, but don't buy the hype. Every Day Has a Beginning is simply a rip off of "Every Saga Has a Beginning" from Star Wars and tries desperately to sucker the viewer into believing this has something to do with the Romero Films, the five opening minutes of any of Georges epics are way better than this movie. While there are a few nice gore scenes, there is no logic or real continuity in the story itself, which kills the whole movie. Watch this crummy waste of time if you must, but don't be surprised when the credits roll and you scream "WHY DID I DO THIS TO MYSELF? You've been warned!
The Curse of the Were-Rabbit (2005)
Simply Superb!
this was one of (with The Corpse Bride) the best films of the year! Wallace and Gromit are claymation heroes! the pair of them never fail to entertain and this, their first (and hopefully not last) feature length film is a cracking good time for all! With chases, puns, homages to famous films and lets not forget the CHEESE, it's a superb entertainment for (sorry Ringling Brothers) Children of All Ages! Gromit is as usual, the star, since even though he doesn't speak, his expressions are great. He drives, flies and runs to help his rather erratic (but well meaning) master. Wallace as usual is in over his head. What would he do without Gromit? If you've never seen them before, don't worry, this is a great intro to the claymation pair!Don't just sit around reading this review! Hurry to the theater and see this film!
Sang faa sau see (1998)
Absolute garbage!
I got this the same time as The Dead Next Door. And while that film was putrid, this, done professionally, is even worse. I have a fondness for Hong Kong Cinema, but this doesn't fit into that niche. This is just one stupid idea piled on another, mixed with bad acting and silliness (it should be marketed as a comedy) set to boil and released upon an unsuspecting public. This entire film, from story, to effects to ending is just BAD, BAD, BAD! It wants to be HK's answer to Dawn of the Dead, instead it's more like Dawn of the Dumb. This is just one stupid film and if this message stops just one person from watching it - it's served its purpose! Avoid this at all costs and save some brain cells!
The Dead Next Door (1989)
The danger of fools with video cameras!
This was one of the worst pieces of crap I've ever seen. This Bookwalter person is worse than Todd Sheets and that's saying a lot. He's not even creative enough to be Ed Wood! The story, a mix between Jonestown, Dawn and Day of the Dead is just terrible, but this mish most of stupid ideas is downplayed by the stupid characters contained within it! Some of the SFX were tolerable but most of this was really just bad. One character decapitates a zombie then puts his fingers in the heads mouth! They get bit off and his pals leave him to be eaten by other zombies! The acting is beyond amateur. I wish I could remove the memory cells that contain this film from my brain! This was just bad, bad, bad! Avoid at all costs! YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED! Oh and how the hell did Sam Raimi get involved with this crapfest? Was he feeling generous? There isn't one original or inventive thing in this whole mess. Ugh! I need an aspirin!