tjstarr-99199 Reviews

Ahsoka: Part Four: Fallen Jedi (2023) Season 1, Episode 4

Improved Pacing. Why is Luke and Leia Not Intervening? Anakin Shows Up & Everyone Loses It? Ray Stevenson is Officially Best & Only Good Part of This Show

[3/10 · 7 September 2023]

Why is Vader's Theme Playing With Redeem/Light-Side Anakin?....Filoni Had to Remind His Audience "THIS GUY WAS DARTH VADER." Hera is Officially A Traitor Who Endangered Her Son & Got Pilots Killed. Sabine.... Starting Another Imperial War < Locating Ezra Who She Has No Proof Of Life. Stop With The ONLY NR PILOT GUY (Carson) For Any Scene Involving X-Wings. Better Than Previous Episodes But STALE Writing Remains.

Why aren't Luke and Leia intervening into this matter? Fallen Jedi, threats of Thrawn returning, Sith Inquisitors, possible 2nd Imperial War. Luke and Leia would be brought in, or at the very least mentioned. Just like when Marvel has to justify not using the Avengers during high levels of threat. Something the show should address and simply will not, or forgot.

Honestly, some positives, the pacing of this episode was better. An element of George Lucas's directing which was one of his strengths was, "Make it bigger and make it faster." This episode had this. The less Filoni dialogue spoken, the better. The editing back-and-forth between fight sequences worked and had me engaged. The less scenes with absolutely nothing happening to drive the plot or the characters, even better. The direction was slightly better, but unfortunately even a new director cannot help fix the lifeless performances. Ray Stevenson is officially the most and only interesting character in Ahsoka. Like his previous line regarding how few Jedi are left and pity to kill one, his line of losing faith a long time ago is something I'm more interested in. He's the character we should be following. Not Ahsoka, Sabine, or Hera....they're boring and terrible in this.

A tiny unimpressive victory, FINALLY, in an X-Wing pilot FINALLY said, "Lock s-foils in attack position." I simple command line said in most pre-Disney SW. However, Disney SW constantly forgets to have it's X-Wing pilots say this. No one in the sequel trilogy, Rogue One, Mando, Boba Fett, no one. Until now.

Then we have Anakin Skywalker. Vader's theme would never be played with a redeemed and light-side Anakin, and any SW fan would know this. This was Rings of Power level of bad to play Vader's theme in order to let the target audience know...THIS WAS DARTH VADER. Honestly, this is Dave's poor attempt to simply have live-action imposter Anakin and Ahsoka fight for no logical narrative reason in the next episode. If you absolutely loved this episode because of this predictable reveal and you think Dave Filoni is the savior of SW or the best thing about SW since Lucas left.....get some real help.

Hera might officially be the worst character in the show. None of her actions or words are that of a military general. In this episode she tries to send a small team to investigate Ashoka's location. The very thing she should've done in the previous episode instead of requesting senators to send an entire fleet. Her actions and poor choice of words in the previous episode put her on lock down. She breaks orders from her superiors, takes her son with her into possibly dangerous territory, and get several X-Wing pilots killed. She also freezes up when she should've order her ships to get out of the path of the ship about to enter hyperspace. She is a traitor, and any logical written narrative would have her character punished for her actions.

Sabine is faced with a choice. Prevent a 2nd Imperial War, or hand over the map for the unknown possibility of finding Ezra who she has no proof of life. Sabine selfishly chooses THE THREAT OF WAR putting the lives of many at great risk for the life of one who may or may not be alive. How are these characters protagonists?

Ahsoka, use your FORCE PULL on the map! Stop trying to physically grab the map. The map is destroyed, but no fear. Just like Toht in Raiders of the Lost Ark, Ahsoka has it burned onto her hand. I'm sure another Filoni-Indiana Jonesl rip-off will have a payoff somehow.

STOP having Carson in all scenes involving X-Wings in Mando seasons 2 and 3, Book of Boba Fett, and now Ahsoka. I like the actor, but he is legit the ONLY NR PILOT GUY we ever see. He's not Wedge level awesome, he's just Carson...that one and ONLY NR PILOT GUY. Is the NR that short on pilots that is only has this one dude and like 10 others?

As for the rest of the episode, the action is not fully dull, but it's nothing remarkable or as entertaining as the fight sequences in the OT and Prequels. Especially when the budget for these shows is capable of achieving this level of action. Shin is officially not an intimating character. Her one look is a cross between a that of a wondering cat or a deer in the headlights 24/7. Even when she speaks, "You have no power." You cannot help but laugh at how ridiculous she looks and sounds.

Ahsoka: Part Three: Time to Fly (2023) Season 1, Episode 3

THE PHANTOM MENACE Was More Exciting And Made More Political And Military Sense Than This. Why is General Hera Not Sending A Small Reconnaissance Instead of Needing a Fleet?

[2/10 · 30 August 2023]

HERE WE GO AGAIN...Hera Is A Useless General Who Is Unable To Send A Few X-Wings or Probes To Investigate, Instead She Wants a Fleet While Acting Like A War Monger. Enemy Fighters Aim For The Tiny Astronaut And Not The Crippled Ship. Sabine Is Defeated By A Cup. And There Be Star Whales Here! In Short, Little Happens. Ahsoka Continues its STALE Run of Weak Writing.

General Hera embarrasses herself before a panel of senators by not acting like a military leader. Her non-logical emotional arguments of personal war mongering are based on little information, and the most compelling evidence she has she doesn't present. A group of Sith fighters stealing a hyperdrive engine and killing the crew of a New Republic cruiser, an assassination attempt on Sabine. Hera skips on what is the most compelling evidence, to instead present what is not enough to support her request for a whole fleet, or her claim of Thrawn being alive and wanting to start another war.

"Anakin, don't let your personal feelings get in the way!" -Kenobi in Attack of The Clones

Hera shows a deep conflicted personal vendetta for Thrawn and is willing to blindly send a fleet without knowing more information, when she should be sending a reconnaissance team. A some group of X-Wings and probe droids to search the area, and assist her friends who are already on they way there. Surely she can send these with her military rank? She does have the power and authority to send a small team without senate approval, but doesn't. Filoni decided to make the entire senate look foolish as hell for absolutely no reason, by accusing Hera of simply wanting to look for Erza. However, this puts Hera in a prime spot to present all her supporting intel from the previous episode, and she doesn't. Instead she allows her personal feelings to interfere with her military leadership. She is not a competent general. Senator Xiono states, as senators their duty is to serve the people, and Hera's request would be a waste of valuable resources which are being used to aid the people of a fragile and still re-building Republic. Senator Xiono is RIGHT. There is no logic in Hera's requests. Again, she should be asking for a reconnaissance team, not a fleet. Also, Hera is not presenting them all the intel information she gathered in the previous episode. She's actually withholding evidence.

Ahsoka and Sabine go investigating alone, but not without a unsettling callback to Luke's training in A New Hope. Again, Filoni thinks his SW audience may not catch the reference. The two characters continue their stiff lifeless acting, with Ahsoka having the same tone of voice the entire episode.

Action ensues when they exit hyperspace early, siting this as a Jedi tactic when it's really a basic investigation tactic.

Within seconds of exiting hyperspace, a distance away from the target, Shin and the weakest enemy fighters quickly jump ascend on. Almost like they read the script and were anticipating them showing up right there and then. Makes sense in the Battle of Endor, not in this episode. No joke, the laser blasts from the enemy fighters are the weakest ever seen in Star Wars. Ahsoka tells Sabine to "man the gunner" and her order comes with no sense of urgency, tension, or danger, but comes off as bored. Sabine, who the episodes have remarked on what a great Mandalorian shot she is struggles tremendously in hitting a single fighter in a 3D space environment. Eventually, she shoots down a fighter and joyfully shouts, "I got one!" just like Luke in A New Hope. However, as seen in Rebels, Sabine has clearly shot down several fighters before. Luke in A New Hope shouts this when it comes was actually his first ever starfighter kill.

The witch, Morgan Elsbeth, has her turbolasers to open fire on Ahsoka's ship. After dozens of deflected shots they hit the ship, and somehow dealt the smallest amount of damage ever seen from a turbolaser. Then, the canons stop firing once the ship is hit. WHAT? They think the ship was destroyed when this Millennium Falcon size ship is visibly disabled and floating in space.

Shin Hati says her fighters will finish the job. Why not just have the canons continue to fire, since Shin is further away? This gave Ahsoka enough time instantaneously suit up and exit the ship into outer space to fight off enemy starships using her lightsabers...THIS EPISODE HAS HIT ROCK BOTTOM. A lightsaber can take off an entire wing of an enemy fighter, but when people like Sabine and Reva (Kenobi show) survive getting stabbed in the gut. Shin and her fighters, instead of targeting and destroying the already crippled giant spaceship, aim for tiny Ahsoka. In a scene which gets dumber by the second, and the Star Whales have not shown up yet. Sabine fixes the ship in the most convenient timing. They're pursued down to the planet where, "ADMIRAL, THERE BE WHALES HERE." Dave Filoni's Star Whales randomly show up and it's simply for showcasing. However, Ahsoka does use these rare and majestic creatures as shields from the laser blasts. A move which feels cruel coming from the protagonist. Positive, Ahsoka actually smiles. There has been so little expression from any of these characters, when the main character first smiles you cannot help but notice.

The episode ends with poor Ray Stevenson looking bored, un-used, and asking himself, "THIS IS SUPPOSE TO BE STAR WARS?"

Was there anything good?

-Ahsoka telling Sabine, she intends to not train her to be a Jedi, but to be herself. This is actually in-character for Ahsoka. Glad to see Filoni get at least one thing right.

-SOME of the action was entertaining. WWII callbacks are a welcome, when they make sense unlike in TLJ.

-The sound effects for the enemy fighters were good.

And.... That's it.

Ahsoka: Part One: Master and Apprentice (2023) Season 1, Episode 1

STALE Writing (Rips-Off TROS), STALE Direction, and STALE Acting. Filoni is Stranded in Pre-OT Animation.

[3/10 · 24 August 2023]

Ahsoka already starts off without any praise. It's bland and painfully stale.

A MacGuffin with the location of a supposedly dead high commanding Imperial from the Galactic War, which was learned through whispers of the dead speaking, is sought out. The MacGuffin dagger...I mean ball, leads to the recent location of Thrawn, and was buried in a puzzle chamber of an ancient Jedi temple. Again, a ball which which shows where Thrawn has been hiding in the only the past recent years has clearly been hiding for longer in this ancient Jedi temple.

Sound like The Rise of Skywalker? Well it's also the plot of the first episode of Ahsoka. Not the only JJ Abrams rip off in the episode. We also get a lifeless parody of the young Kirk wrecking his stepdad's car in Star Trek (2009). All that was missing was The Beastie Boys.

Very little happens in this 55 MINUTE episode. The amount of time (over 30 minutes) that passes before someone finally thinks about turning the pieces on the MacGuffin ball was staggering. Scenes drag out with no establishment or setups, very little dialogue, unnecessary exposition recapping events the target SW audience already knows, quick 180 shifts in tone and conversations, at one point Ahsoka walks away to another room to collect a random cup which she never uses, long anti-climactic sequences where people stare at each other. The prequels had similar issues, but they had the luxury of great distracting visuals, Ben Burt sound effects, professional editing, and the legendary John Williams to keep scenes engaging. The acting in Ahsoka is just as wooden and even more stale than the prequels. However, we know with the prequels, George would not allow the actors early access to the script. He would only allow them access to the scenes the day of, and would only allow them 3 takes. What was Dave Filoni's excuse? I doubt he followed the same method as George.

We also get.... Sabine goes back and forth between her place and the city one too many times with nothing happening to justify it. She skips on a speech to speed home, feed her cat, re-watch an old hologram stating nothing new, fall asleep, and then wake up and speed back into the city....time wasted. Non-complexed puzzles take too long to solve in order to drag out the runtime. Unnecessary reminders that the Jedi Order no longer exists. Etc etc etc.

When little happens you start noticing the little stuff, like the actors. Their movements are stiff, lifeless, emotionless, expressionless, and slow as turtles. In fact, the acting feels AI and it is accompanied with weak dialogue. Rosario Dawson, Mary Elizabeth Winstead, Clancy Brown, and Ray Stevenson are all great actors, and none of them give even a slightly interesting performance. Not their faults, as they have all been great in prior films/shows. Even, Ray Stevenson, who was an absolute Chad deserved better than this direction in Ahsoka for his finale role. Ray, a really good actor, looks bored as hell in this. Not only Ray, but everyone looks this way.

The lightsaber fights are sequel trilogy dull and lackluster. The choreography is loaded with bad timing, inconsistencies with weapons and droids. Certain droids now have Predator like self-destruct nuclear blasts, which will end up adding to key plot holes, as they should be using this all the time. Certainly would be bad if one was knowingly and willing activated in a CITY HOSPITAL, especially by our protagonists.

Disney and Dave Filoni.... What works in animation does not always transition well in a simply copy and paste live-action. Even the cartoon wall mural of the characters of "Rebels" felt completely out of place. If a mural of Pocahontas was made in real life, it wouldn't be of the Disney cartoon Pocahontas, it would have a real human-like resemblance. The Rebels mural is cringe for live-action and takes you completely out of the SW live-action world. It would've been best served in Who Framed Roger Rabbit? Where the world building is a combination of love-action and cartoon characters.

The best thing of Ahsoka so far is the music. However, this is Star Wars, visuals and music are usually the two things you can rely on to be good. Recently with Book of Boba Fett, Obi-Wan Kenobi, and Mando season 3, it's the writing and directing you cannot rely on. Unfortunately, Tony Gilroy and his Andor team are unable to work or help with writing any of these other shows.

The episode has the great misfortune of having a cheap unearned fake-out death. It's only the first episode and we're already having Sabine's death faked out? We know she's not gonna be killed. Hopefully she'll be in critical condition and in the hospital recovering for days, but this is Filoni/Favreau Star Wars so most likely no. A lightsaber stab use to mean death, now it's treated like a Monty Python joke. Sabine's fake-out death happens before acknowledging the real life death of Ray Stevenson with, "For Our Friend Ray". Again, wrong placement Dave. The "in-memory of" should've came before the Lucasfilm logo at the beginning.

Dave Filoni is incapable of breaking out of his pre-OT animation comfort zone. What the first two episodes of Ahsoka have both proven is that Filoni has no business writing and directing live-action Star Wars. Right now, all Star Wars has going for it, is Andor.

Ahsoka: Part Two: Toil and Trouble (2023) Season 1, Episode 2

Our Heroes Knowingly, Willingly, Recklessly, Risk Detonating a Bomb Inside a CITY HOSPITAL.

[2/10 · 24 August 2023]

The show continues its stale writing, directing, and acting with episode 2. The not heavy dialogue is slow, delivered without effort or expression, and is boring to hear. Unlike the first episodes of Andor where the dialogue was captivating, had character development, loads of world building, set-up with payoffs, likable/interesting characters, professional direction, and outstanding acting.... Ahsoka lacks these basic qualities from a multi-million dollar Disney project. However, the episode shockingly has one of the dumbest moments in Star Wars.

What should be in a Naked Gun film.... Sabine is in the hospital looking great after being stabbed by a lightsaber hours prior with a simple quarter size scar. Forget that lightsabers burn away flesh, bones, organs, melt blast doors. Ahsoka leaves to go to Sabine's place in the hopes of finding a random droid which she has no reason to believe would still be there, and is in fact there but no zero reason since their mission was completed. Unlike Sabine, Ahsoka easily defeats the droid and brings its disabled head to Sabine in the hopes of triggering information from it. Absurdity as aside of how and why the droid still has this information, Sabine warns Ahsoka and Hera (New Republic general) that activating the droid could risk detonating its self-destruct. Which we saw in episode 1 to be the size of a small nuclear explosion. Ahsoka says there's "No time" to fly somewhere else, and Hera (a general) tells Sabine to "Go for it" inside a HOSPITAL in the MIDDLE OF A HEAVILY POPULATED CITY. These three "protagonists" willingly, knowingly, recklessly, and selfishly risk activating and detonating a small nuclear bomb inside a HOSPITAL, within the CITY when there was nothing but time for them to get in a starship and fly outside the city where people are not located. Even the highway going in and out of the city has only shown Sabine traveling on it. The droid is activate, and the nuke is activated. These protagonist characters are not likable. How are we suppose to like protagonists who are carelessly willing risk nuking a hospital and a city for information they could simply get by going outside a non-populated area? They are carelessly lazy.

Attention: do not allow Dave Filoni within 10 miles of a city hospital.

Later we have General Hera and Ahsoka at the shipyards where Hera learns shipping information is classified. She demands that her general rank allows her access to any and all classified information, which is completely false. Dave, this is not how the military and classified information works. Generals are not simply permitted to any and all classified information when they are not cleared. Also, Hera demands he simply declassify the information right there on the spot. How can he? If it's classified he doesn't have access to it.

Even if his classified answer was a lie, Hera's demands make absolutely no sense, and if she was a general with common sense she would clearly know this.

Also "FOR THE EMPIRE!" Dude was literally the worst at ambushing.

Watch the fight scene with the dual-bladed Sith fighter, and look for his missed swings at Ahsoka when she is clearly within arms reach of her mystery opponent.

Oppenheimer (I) (2023)

A Grand Opus With "JFK" Vibes. The Dark Knight Reins Supreme, But This Might Just Be Nolan's Absolute Best Work.

[10/10 · 1 August 2023]

Those complaining about this film not passing the Bechdel Test and being too boring, would make the same complaints about the classic 12 Angry Men. Those complaining about the nudity in this film have completely missed the point. The film shows Oppenheimer as a slightly awkward person who used his intelligence as his charm with women. The first sex scene was as expected, slightly awkward almost like the first time you lose your virginity. In the book, Oppenheimer, experienced abusive pressure from his mother in who he should date. The first sex scene is them barley nude with her in-control and dominating him. The later is them both equally comfortable and fully exposed to their core with each other. Like the bomb he's building...they're drawn together, attracted to each other, and when connected sensational things happen, but they're destructive to each other and to those around them. The fact we're still talking about it, proves it was a psychologically effective visual of seeing Oppenheimer and his mistress both on top of each other in that hearing room with Emily Blunt staring directly into her eyes. It's about exposure, to their core, and then to the world.

Also, Cillian Murphy showed more nudity in 28 Days Later than in this...grow up.

Back in the early 90s, Oliver Stone made a profoundly engaging political thriller, JFK. One of the best films of all-time, and one of the best film edits of all-time. The fact that Oppenheimer gave me vibes of Oliver Stone's JFK, speaks volumes of this epic opus from one of the few directors in Hollywood who audiences can still count on to make an above average film and not sell out to cheap gimmicks. Also, to hardcore Nolan fans, this is not Inception 2 or the next Dark Knight feature. Nolan has taken another larger step in the world of cinematic storytelling.

Christopher Nolan has made some of the greatest films in his career. The Dark Knight, Inception, Momento, and Dunkirk. Despite The Dark Knight being one of my all-time favorites, Oppenheimer might just be Nolan's masterpiece of storytelling cinema. Oppenheimer, is not an action pack thrill ride like The Dark Knight and Inception. It's not a insane, complicated narrative like Tenet. Not drowning in complex science like Interstellar. It's not a simple story/history recount with minimal character focus like Dunkirk. Nope, Oppenheimer is Nolan's adaptation of the book American Prometheus, and the source material makes this one of Nolan's best screenplays for him to work off of. This is the most fascinating dive and study of a character I have seen in a Nolan film to date. However, when the film is intense, it's gripping. For a 3 hour film, it's never boring or jarring. Its non-linear editing, sparking JFK vibes, keeps your engagement fully tuned, and leaves you enthralled from each scene. Oppenheimer sparks the dark conspiring thriller notes of JFK, with the mathematical background of A Beautiful Mind, and with a Terrence Malick's The Tree of Life style approach.

Cillian Murphy gives a career high performance amongst an absolutely astonishing cast which includes phenomenal performances from Robert Downy Jr, Emily Blunt, and even a fantastic returning performance from Josh Hartnet. Even the back end of the cast features multiple Oscar winners. Gary Oldman, Casey Affleck, Kenneth Branagh, and Rami Malek. Along with several other talented named actors.

It's that great of a film and character study. Take away Nolan's name from the film and I would still say this. The man who ended WWII, saving possibly millions of lives by ending hundreds of thousands of lives, only to feel guilt and then allow the world to shame him for his controversial gifted brilliance. There is a lot to take from Oppenheimer. In a pretty lackluster year, Oppenheimer is already and easily the film to beat.

Barbie (I) (2023)

Should've been great, but is forced, not subtle or clever, and constantly repeats the same messages non-stop.

[5/10 · 1 August 2023]

What a damn shame. A PG-13 Barbie movie from Greta Gerwig and Noah Baumbach with Margot Robbie and Ryan Gosling, intended for those who loved and hated Barbie. I was looking forward to seeing Barbie. However, even those who hated Barbie would not call her fascist. This film borrows from so many films, The Truman Show, The Lego Movie, Legally Blonde, Toy Story 1-3, Singing In The Rain, Born Yesterday, 2001: A Space Odyssey, Who Framed Roger Rabbit?, and so many more. Other films which I could not help but recall how they got it right, where this film did not.

Barbie is more than a film about iconic dolls coming to life. Filled with a lot of heavy messages, all of which are hard not to miss, and all of which are very forcefully delivered...repetitively. A week ago, I saw Oppenheimer. Had it been on the same level as Barbie, we would've been hearing the words, "Nukes are bad" over and over and over throughout the whole film. Yes, it would've been an extremely annoying experience. We, the audience, know nukes are beyond bad. The film gave its audience the respect in knowing this. Barbie, holds nothing back in constantly spelling out the same messages for its audiences. Did they seriously think the audience would not get any of these directly stated messages? Barbie has little faith in its audience and treats us like....dolls. In fact, Oppenheimer is over an hour longer and yet Barbue felt longer.

I do agree with several of the points the film makes, but it's not done in a clever or impacting way. Not just in one or two scenes, but in dozens. One of the biggest messages is feminism and inequality, to which I agree with many points the film, not so subtly makes. However, most of the arguments can be said for both sexes.

The film aims to be a battle of the sexes, but instead ends up less of a battle between men and women and more between privileged middle class and d-bags.

There was a little enjoyment with Barbie. Margot Robbie and especially Ryan Gosling both look like they're having a blast with their characters. The production design of Barbieworld is wonderful. There were some laughs scattered throughout, about 1 in every 4th joke. Gerwig did a fine job directing this, but the script ultimately brought the film down.

One other thing which ruined the experience for me was the audience. The 9pm audience on a Monday night of a nearly sold out show would not stop talking, or giggling during scenes which were dramatic and not comedy. One of the movie's best scene between Barbie and her creator which is a somber moment, had girls giggling left and right. Barbie was one of the worst theater experiences for me and my wife, who said it was the worst theater experience she's ever had, and even though she liked the film the audience around us ruined her enjoyment. Will say, at least Barbie was better than The Dial of Destiny.

Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom (2018)

So Poorly Written, There Is Not A Single Good Performance In This Abomination. Crichton's Spinning In His Grave.

[2/10 · 28 July 2023]

Thank god Michael Crichton was not around to see and hear this garbage film. JW2 compared to Jurassic Park 3, a bad film, actually makes JP3 tolerable. The overall plot of JW2 is strangely a bad shadowy ripoff of Spielberg's The Lost World. Greedy rich man and his company want to remove dinosaurs from the island and take them to mainland where they'll eventually escape and roam wild, and it's up to a small group to stop them.

Quickly getting the pros of JW2 out of the way. Visually, this is gorgeous looking film with some incredible and memorable shots. The dinosaur with the lava pouring in, a shot similar looking to the original artwork of JP. The scary hybrid raptor in the girl's room after roaring on the rooftop. T-Rex roaring with an exploding volcano in the background. The Brachiosaurus trapped on the dock. There are several amazing visual shots in this film, and there's a few decent sequences. One of the best being the sinking tour ball in the ocean.

However, and very sadly, this ends any praise for JW2. It's all downhill from here...

The biggest problem with the film is the script. The script is not just bad, it's bigger than the pile of crap Malcolm commented on in JP. The script is so bad, it affects every single performance in the absolute worse way. There is not a single good or decent performance in this, and there are some great actors in JW2. Even Toby Jones and James Cromwell cannot give a good performance. Not their faults, because the script (dialogue and character actions) their performance is based on is trash. Isabella Sermon gives an acceptable child performance, but unfortunately her character does one of the dumbest things in the entire Jurassic series. Some actors like Justice Smith, and Daniella Pineda are so bad I would be fine without seeing them in anything ever again. Especially Smith's non-stop screaming, yelling, and all other sounds. Jeff Goldblum makes his glorious return as Ian Malcolm. For all of 3 minutes in this. This film heavily promoted Malcolm's return, and yet he has no bearing on the film. He's there just to get people interested and that's it.

The dialogue is painful, the contrivances are eye rolling, the characters make dozens upon dozens of dumb decisions it actually hurts one's brain. Our main protagonists have to once again fall in-love all over again, because seeing their "strong" chemistry form again was worth taking a second look at. The messages/themes do not work and contradict each other, outcomes are predictable. The script cannot support a 2 hour action thriller featuring dinosaurs.

Just a few examples... Old man, weak in bed, demands the person he just discovered to be a villain to retrieve the phone for him, and tells him it's so he can, "call the police on him." So painful, I almost left the movie.

Blue is shot and is dying, and Daniella Pineda says a blood transfusion will save Blue but it can only be from a two-fingered dinosaur. Movie, go home your drunk!

A demonstration is shown of a hybrid raptor being capable of carrying out commands of attacking anyone. They demonstrate this by pointing a laser on a gun at a person and the raptor goes nuts. You do not need the raptor when the laser is attached to a GUN.

Ted Levine (another really good actor) character's obsession with collecting dinosaur teeth is a terrible setup for how the hybrid raptor escapes. Sure, it is a setup with a payoff, but it's still terrible and cringe.

Clone girl releases dinosaurs upon the world where they will attack and kill countless humans. The film justifies this pure villainous act as righteous by having her say, "I had to. They're alive, like me." Get real movie!

Since the characters of JW2 are so terrible and miserable to watch and listen to, I am rooting for the dinosaurs 100 percent of the way. Even in The Lost World, I cared about the characters. Even the minor ones like Ajay, Roland's best friend, who gets killed by raptors hiding in the field of long grass. No one in JW2 is worth time and effort, because time and effort did not go into this script.

Also, stop trying to militarize dinosaurs. They would be terrible in a war against guns, missiles, planes, bombs, etc.

Jurassic World was a decent guilty pleasure, but whatever fun perks that film had going for it are derailed with JW2.

Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny (2023)

An Uninspiring, Miserable, Unintentionally Depressing $300 Million Downer "PRODUCT" Made Only for One Particular Individual

[1/10 · 24 July 2023]

Kathleen did not realize she made Indy's goal to unintentionally save Hitler from being killed. Unlike Star Wars, she worked on every Indiana Jones film, starting as Spielberg's assistant on Raiders. All those years, working one-on-one with Steven Spielberg. Sadly, nothing was learned

Before "Indiana Jones and The Quest to Save Hitler", the last movie which unintentionally left me feeling depressed was "The Last Jedi". Now another product of Disney/Lucasfilm, "Indiana Jones and The Dial Soap Bar You'll Need to Wash This PRODUCT Off"; is equally as depressing and completely destroys another franchise, but more importantly a legendary iconic hero. This pathetic PRODUCT trashes the core aspects of Indiana's character and knowingly makes him more depressing than old man Carl in "UP".

Steven Spielberg was and still is the kid who refused to grow up into an adult. Even late in life, his movies still have a kid-like fun in them. Even Crystal Skull still had fun/entertaining scenes with an older but still energetic Harrison Ford. Even Steven Spielberg left this project as director, and it's obvious why. Even Spielberg would not be allowed to make and tell a story which would best fit Indiana Jones under Lucasfilm's CEO and Disney Studios.

The best "Indiana Jones and The Last Jedi" gets is its opening 20 minute prologue, and with John Williams who can do no wrong. Unfortunately, the prologue is not great or very good, but its upbeat and slightly entertaining. A stand alone short film, and shadowy relic tease of a decent Indy flick. Dr. Voller is legit KILLED, the prologue ends, as does the film. Would be best to stop/leave the film after 21 minutes because what follows is unforgivable depression and heartbreak. The movie transitions into a bleak, cold, hollow PRODUCT.

We've already seen an older Indy in Henry Jones senior in The Last Crusade. A man who despite physical limits found strength in other ways. "Let my armies be the rocks, the trees, and the birds in the sky". Old Indy is depressed and a uninspiring shadow of his former self. Marion's divorcing him. Mutt was killed by Kathleen and the Vietnam War, which he only joined to get back at Indy. Indy is the reason for Mutt to storming off to die in Vietnam. Like her treatment with Star Wars, Kennedy continues her quest to squash all previous established stories and characters from Lucas, and now Spielberg. Rather than embracing old age like Henry senior did, Indy 5 wants the audience to know that growing old is really disappointing and lacks joy. We get a bitter, depressed, old man who starts his day by drinking, and will eventual end up wanting to die alone because there is nothing left for him in the present world. Indy has no interest/love in present moon landing history, and no one cares for Indy stuck in past history. Indy's classroom is aLeo depressing. It's his last day as he is retiring from a new university and before the school semester ends. Indy even tells his students the lecture will be on the final despite its his last day. Indy is miserable in teaching archeology. His students are bored to death and uninspired, capturing a look similar of the audience.

Hallmarks of Indy films, snakes, horror moments, a great villain comeuppance, are GONE. Prior Indy films had a strong effort to teach about the artifact and its myths, there's little mythological legend with the Dial. No lessons or teachings to be learned about the history, artifacts, or the characters, and no insightful or imaginative storytelling. All previous Indy films were dense and rich with story, characters, set pieces, and action scenes. Indy films were never known for bad sound mixing, rough editing, terrible comedy, overlooked themes, boring action, anti-climatic finales, and confusing plots. The entire subplot involving the CIA with Voller is confusing as hell, adds nothing to the film, and should've been completely cut out. CIA agents are assisting NASA rocket scientist Dr. Voller (Mads Mikkelsen), a former Nazi legit KILLED in the prologue, in recovering the Dial artifact. Both of these government agencies have NO CLUE he's a Nazi. Why is the CIA really helping Voller get the Dial? Don't know. The CIA even accepts Voller's men gunning down innocent civilians and opening fire in mass crowds. Indy crushes one of the men who goes around on the crutches (probably killing him). Who was he? CIA or Nazi? No explanation but more than likely CIA. Indy is framed and immediately wanted for murdering a pair of co-workers killed by Voller's goons. Indy claims he needs the Dial to prove his innocence. How will possession of the Dial prove anything? No answer, in fact the the movie ends without resolving Indy being wanted for murder.

Mads Mikkelsen, a great actor, would play a great Nazi villain, but his character is easily the worst main Indy villain of the series. Voller is never intimidating or menacing, but is always getting out-smarted and out-witted. His goal is to acquire both sections of the Dial and use it to travel back in time to 1939 Berlin to assassinate Hitler and win the war as leader. First off, how is he going to take over Nazi Germany after he kills Hitler? He cannot just show up and assassinate Hitler at the height of his power and expect to be given full control. That's not how it works. He wants to kill Hitler, and Indy is trying to stop him.

James Mangold stated this PRODUCT was out to prove even as an old man, the world still needs Indy. Yet, it consistently goes back and forth on this without ever solidly landing on a definitive "The world needs Indy", especially when Helena Shaw (Phoebe Waller-Bridge) constantly saves the day. Helena is a disgustingly selfish, annoying, greedy, high ego driven, tone deaf, and a down-right unlikeable character. Friends of Indy die and moments later she cheers at the fun they just had. Helena talks down to everyone with extreme high ego for herself. On three separate occasions she intentionally traps, leaves, and directly tries to get Indy killed. There is no lessons for her to learn, no change, no character arc or redemption. NOTHING. She calls Indy an "aging grave robber" who "only did it for the buzz", and Indy has no follow up for this. Indy rescued an entire village of children and then gave the village back the magic rock which brought life to the village instead of keeping it for his own fortune and glory. Crystal Skull introduced Mutt Williams who ended up being mentored by Indy because he was out of his element and thrown into Indy's world. Helena is the opposite, out besting Indy and rescuing him throughout the plot. Helena is Kathleen Kennedy written and cast in this. PWB performs Helena like she knows she's in a movie, and is strictly here to play up to the audience rather than play a character. Her sidekick, Teddy, is a terribly cheap forgettable Short Round rip-off. Their backstory is even one-for-one how Indy met Shorty.

Indy 5 is jammed with unbelievable contrivances, plagued with flaws, and loaded with retconning. The tomb of Archimedes contains a wrist watch, to advanced. The watch serves as the key working component for the Dial. When we travel back in time we learn the watch was Voller's, taken off of his dead body to become the heart of the Dial. A Dial which Archimedes has not yet finished inventing during the battle of Syracuse. A battle in-which Archimedes was killed, but when Archimedes meets Indy, he gives him the watch. The heart of the Dial which Archimedes still needs in order to complete. Without the watch, there is no Dial. Time travel elements of the film are beyond broken.

During this a severely wounded Indy demands to stay behind in the past to die alone because there is nothing left for him in the present. All this happens in the most miserable and depressing way possible. Watching one of the most memorable iconic heroic characters of cinema beg and act this way was insanely depressing. PWB punches Indy out and transports him unconscious to New York. He wakes asking Helena why she didn't listen to him. She says, staying (dying) would've changed the course of history (too late movie). Indy's response is, "Is that bad?". Indiana Jones, the man who refused to look into the Ark, returned the magic stones to the village, agreed to walk away from the holy grail, returned the crystal skull to its rightful place. Indy is one of the only characters I know would NEVER EVER go back in time and have the intention of messing and off-setting history. There is a reason Indy recovers ancient artifacts from villains, to prevent them from being used in a time period they were not intended for. Indiana Jones would NEVER do or say this, but this miserable Jake Skywalker grump does.

PRODUCT ends with Indy only existing in this world because Marion returns. Does not state, show, or imply any other fundamental purpose or meaningful fulfillment in Indy's current life. Not archeology, love of history, teaching, friends, his drive for discovery or to do what's right. None of that! Marion is all that's left for him, giving Karen Allen 3-ish minutes of screen time without any meaningful contribution. The end states, getting old is miserable and if you don't have a Marion what good are you left with. Rather than leaving an uplifting sense of adventure, this left dread upon the audience. Oh yeah, John Rhys-Davies and Antonio Banderas (Oscar nominee) with less than 12 lines and top billing was also briefly in this horrible 154 minute disaster.

Who or what is to blame for "Indiana Jones and The Dial DEPRESS hotline"?

1. Too many cooks in the kitchen- 4 writers, 3 editors, 10 producers, 3 studios.

2. Kathy. This was a PRODUCT intended for no one else than her. Every Lucasfilm franchise has been bulldozed into the ground by her lack of leadership. Disney, how much more money from the fans/customers of these once extremely profitable IPs are you willing to lose before you finally wake up and fire KK?

Velma (2023– )

Wow, Beyond Terrible! Unfunny & Mean-Spirited Rip-Off of Harley Quinn. Velma Is The Show 90s Parents Were Accusing South Park of Being.

[1/10 · 15 July 2023]

The only positive about Velma, it united everyone on all sides, to agree this show should not exist. This abomination is a talentless rip-off of a far better adult cartoon...HBO's Harley Quinn. Velma is the She-Hulk of adult animation, and somehow worse. Fowl, bitter, cruel, spiteful, mean spirited, tone deaf, and very self aware of all this doing just to upset audiences. The idea of an adult comedy version of the Scooby-Doo characters is worth exploring and I welcome it, but this was very fowl. I actually forgot I was watching what was suppose to be the Scooby-Doo characters at heart and spirit, because this show makes the Scooby Doo IP a far far secondary. Mindy Kaling is not the real Velma. Mindy Kaling plays herself in the body of a 15 year-old teenager being mean spirited with unnecessary use of nudity, genital shaming, drug dealing, hating while also crushing/flirting with racism, the list goes on. No imagination, no creation of a character you wish you could be. Mindy Kaling placed her own identity in Velma, and Velma is despicable. Where are all the parents from the 90s who protested South Park as mean-spirited hate? Velma is the show that 1990s parents were accusing South Park of being. South Park got slammed by parents, despite the fact South Park is a well-written comedy. While Velma is pure rotten garbage.

First off, one of the biggest problems is the comedy. It's not funny, and feels wrongfully out of place. Episode 2 got one little chuckle out of me and that was it for two whole episodes.

Second, it's far from subtle in its social messaging themes, while also mocking them. The messages get crammed into your face and it becomes very eye rolling. It's purple hair The Last Jedi level bad. Good stories will not forcefully include socially acceptable themes. They'll do so in a clever, less than obvious manner, and subtly serve the story and character developments. Velma, both verbally and non-verbally, shouts and beats you over the head constantly with them. And this is just within the first 2 episodes! In Harley Quinn, Harley and Poison Ivy don't fall in-love until end of season 2, after building it up and well-establishing the two characters should be together. In Velma, this happens in episode 2 for no reason.

Third, this show wants to have the same dark and raunchy adult comedy you get in Harley Quinn. With loads of graphic violence, sex, cockroach sex, all the profanity, drug dealing, PTSD, sucky rich people, and everything else you'd expect in Scooby-Doo. If you're curious in knowing what is wrong with Velma, watch the first 2 minutes of Episode I, before the title credit even shows. Right out the gate, after an opening jab at origin stories which focus on white males struggling with more power we get an all female shower scene with nudity featuring high school teenage girls ages ranging between 13-17. Follow with Velma, committing full-out physical assault on Daphne for no good or comical reason, and getting away with it. This is our immediate introduction into Kaling's created world. Fred is introduced as a blatant dumb racist who Velma dislikes but is also sexually attracted to. Later, Fred seeks the attention of his classmate's in the hallway by cutting off another teenager's leg. Later, Velma trespasses into Fred's home resulting in him getting knee-capped by lesbian police. Velma, boosts out loud, if she were a white male she would want to get away with murder too, while Fred gets wrongfully arrested for murder without evidence.

These "Scooby-Doo" characters are straight-up vile villains, and the show's creator wants them to be this way. The Scooby characters are all extremely unlikable. Classic characters who were never vile beings with villainous traits, and yet here they are. In Harley Quinn, they're bad guys, it's what they do. Hate Velma for making me quote Suicide Squad.

Key changes are made to these characters without it being better written into the story, instead there is no real creative reason for these changes. Also, we have Velma, Daphne, Fred, but not Shaggy? Instead we get Norville. I get it, he'll get introduced to weed and become Shaggy later. How "clever". Immediate annoyance at this obvious misfire of comedy. He should start off as a stoner loser who goes on to show his talents with mysteries.

There are 2 ways to look at Velma...

1) This was a long time passion project for the creator.

2) This was a project in-which the creator had no interests in doing but did it.

No matter which one of these is accurate, both badly reflects the showrunner's credibility.

As a millennial, I honestly don't know who this show is for. Velma's creator is not funny and Velma is a disastrously unfunny tone deaf abomination. This is a show that does not know what it is. Again, I forgot this was supposedly Scooby-Doo. What She Hulk and Velma have in common is their both out to troll trollers by sacrificing story, characters, any all intentions of good just to purposefully make audiences hate it. A better written show like South Park will do this successfully by making the incorporated message secondary to the story. Velma, it's sprayed constantly and comes out of nowhere for no reason or purpose at all. Velma might be worse than dumpster fire bad. A real shame too, because there could be something fun here. However, it needed someone who was not MK, and someone who actually likes or has some level of respect for the handling of the Scooby-Doo IP.

Asteroid City (2023)

Visually Beautiful & Well-Crafted. Story Ranges From Fine, To Semi-Frustrating, & Slightly Pretentious.

[6/10 · 25 June 2023]

Those who thought this was a "boring" film, should not be criticized for thinking this. Asteroid City is a visual wonder and treat of world building. Wes Anderson's productions are easily well-known for their impressive artistic visual structure and camera work. No disappointment in any of these categories. Featuring a massive array of talent which included a cast of 4 Oscar winners and 9 Oscar nominees, all giving solid theatrical-style performances. The setting is an absolute delight, and ranks as one of the top production designs in any Wes Anderson film. All the characters are carefully pieced, selected, and framed. All building up to a finale which I considered a pretentious, underwhelming, and slightly dissatisfying. It's hard to not see this particular story as Wes Anderson being unsure about which direction to go in. This was easily a story Anderson wrote/worked on while stuck in quarantine during COVID. The themes of loss, uncertainty, entrapment, search for answers, childhood into adulthood are all well-received and present. However, once the themes completely over take the narrative and substance, that's when the movie starts to disappoint. All these themes could've fit well into a story which resulted in a fun gimmicky alien invasion story, just like in "Mars Attacks!" which the film even makes a hidden reference to. Or a narrative which leads into alien abduction. Something....anything. Any conflict better than simply, "they're all stuck in quarantine". Another problem with Asteroid City is the story's massive number of characters. I love a story which gives every little character a unique presence to the story. Problem is, there are enjoying scenes with these characters, but when the movie ends I was still pondering if these scenes were needed. They added little to the narrative, took time away from the main conflict, and resulted in a unbalanced flow of the narrative. A successful balance of adults and children in the narrative was achieved far better in Moonrise Kingdom than in Anderson's effort this time. While the character payoffs do make sense, some of the key payoffs feel shallow than unsatisfying. The payoffs you would easily imagine the film going in simply do not happen. Asteroid City is easily one of my favorite world buildings in a Wes Anderson film. I was hooked within the opening minutes, and yet it felt unused to its full potential. Shame too, because this could've easily have been a great film.

There is enjoyment to be found throughout Asteroid City, but in the end the descriptive words used regarding the narrative would have to include, "underwhelming" and "cheated".

The Mandalorian: Chapter 24: The Return (2023) Season 3, Episode 8

Nothing Happened! Again, Audiences Had Better Ideas Than The Writer. Written As A Generic Video Game

[1/10 · 21 April 2023]

What a complete embarrassment!

After last week's episode, questions were coming up.... Is the Armorer really a spy? Or is Axe a spy?

Were the Mandos they found stranded on Mandalore for 30 years now converted Imperials with undying hate for Bo?

How would Paz's son react to his father's death?

Would the Armorer be revealed as the mother of Paz's son?

Would the Mythosaur unite the Mandos and help defeat Moff?

Why is Moff keeping Din alive? Torture information out of him?

Would Din die?

Who were the remaining spies?

NOTHING...Not even the slightest shimmer of any sort of intriguing substance or material HAPPENS.

Remember how in Return of The Jedi, Luke had to battle his way through stormtroopers, droids, and the emperor's guards just to get to Vader and the Emperor? Wait, that was SNES Super Return of The Jedi. A great game. This episode had all the elements of a generic video game only lazy and much lamer. Get from level to level, with harder enemies as you go. Face the big bad guy. Beat the bad guy and when go to your open world cabin. Now that you defeated the villain all that's left is to explore the open world and bounty hunt...What this season should've been doing from the start!

Mandos can now jet pack up through the Tropopause where average temperatures are -60 degrees, without considering the wind chill. Mandos are not wearing protective clothing from dangerously severe freezing temperatures. At the most, they would've suffered extreme frost bite.

How did those Mando's have enough jet pack fuel to rocket down and battle in the air, but not have enough fuel to chase after the bird monster?

The Mandos had a Capitol Ship, which are difficult to come by, extremely useful, and heavily armed with canons. The Mandos abandoned the ship, sacrificing it for no good reason, allowing an equal number of Tie Inceptors to easily take it out.

Moff was basically Shredder in the original Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles games and movies. Only, Moff went out in a surprisingly lamer way than Shredder did. I hope Moff is dead, but they'll probably say it was a clone of him that died.

Capes made of cloth will burn when they come into contact with fire. Din's cape comes into contact with fire several times and never burns.

Moff crushes the darksaber in Bo's hand. Her hand should've also been crushed to the point of her needing a robot hand. Sure, the show makes an attempt to show her hand was slightly injured, maybe even fractured, but seeing the saber crushed and bent is how Bo's hand should look. BTW her hand is fine in the aftermath scene.

The Praetorian Guards have Mando pinned down and they stop killing him just to chase after Grogu? Why not have Grogu stop them with the force? Grogu's ability to use the force on them would show him as the greater threat. The Praetorian Guards are so strong, skilled, and well armed they easily took out Paz, but they cannot capture a BABY? Favreau and Filoni brought them back to redeem their horrible fighting in TLJ only to make it worse by having them struggle/fail with a BABY.

CGI fighting Yoda in Episode II looked better than this flipping all over Baby Yoda.

Also, stop having Grogu walk without touching the ground.

What was season 3 about in the end? What was it building up to? What progressed for story and characters?

Din officially adopts Grogu and gives him a first name.... We all considered Grogu adopted by Din the minute he left Luke for this guy character and his crazy cult?

Set-ups taking Grogu on Din journeys?... We were already doing this!

Din talks about bounty hunting again.... Sorry show. You had all this time and did little bounty hunting. I don't trust any promises or setups you make.

Again, Mando goes and meets the ONLY NR PILOT in the galaxy. Din says that now he needs to be more selective in his bounty hunting assignments. Despite the fact he's only taken around 3 or 5 bounty hunting missions in 3.5 seasons! Din offers to work for the NR under the table, without coming up with a solution as to how he'll pay din. How is this one pilot suppose to pay him!?!?? Out of his own paycheck which is probably not a lot?

This season was a massive waste of potential. The Mandalorian was already a mediocre show, but with lots of room to be good. The amount of time season 3 wasted on pointless action scenes, that pirate subplot, Lizzo and Jack Black's side quest, rescuing Helmet Kid from bird's stomach, a whole episode recapping...was all shocking. All the insane stupidity jammed into this one season alone was enough to stop a 10/10 finale from lifting this to a so-so season. Seriously, until episode 6, Din and Bo were the ONLY MANDOS WITH SHIPS! Favreau, it's time for you to go away. Filoni, you cannot write live-action like one of your animation shows. Aside from the Dr. Pershing story, the writing was beyond bad. It was appalling. Even if Gina's firing affected some of this, it cannot account for all of it. Cannot credit the visuals or the production designs because it's Star Wars, they've always been consistently good.

This show and season got so bad I signed up for the free week of Paramount streaming and I...a die-hard Star Wars fan, watched season 3 of Picard. It was vastly superior in every sense of the word. Thank god I watched Picard season 3.

The Mandalorian: Chapter 23: The Spies (2023) Season 3, Episode 7

For 30 Years A Group Of Mandos Have been On Mandalore!?!? No, no, no, no, no, no. Beskar Is Beyond Inconsistent. Spy Set-Up Goes Nowhere.

[1/10 · 13 April 2023]

Will admit, the show beautifully captured the neon noir look of Blade Runner. Had me wishing I was watching Blade Runner instead.

IG-12 is retrofitted for Grogu, and NOW Din thinks this is a bad idea?...

-Not taking Grogu into the Mandalorian Mines?

-Not making Grogu fight a kid?

-Or having Grogu fly in Din's N1 during the pirate battle?

This is where Din draws the line. Worst guardian babysitter ever.

Time is wasted with Grogu being an annoying ahole in IG-12. He steals, he destroys. Those arguing, "He's just a baby".... EXACTLY!

After a cheap and uninspiring "I am Spartacus" scene, it's time to take back Mandalore from...the creatures who lived below them? How convenient there were creatures below them but only after the bombing did they re-surface.

What was their "REAL" plan? Kill every creature and then start cleaning up the miles upon miles of ruin? Good luck cleaning up all those billion tons of rumble.

However, they quickly discovery. They're not the only Mandos on the planet. A Mad Max group of Mandos have been living on the planet since the fall of Mandalore. For 30 YEARS!?!? During all that time, they couldn't find a ship, or a RADIO, or Gideon's Imperial hanger where ships have been flying in and out of????

They get ambushed by Imperials wearing beskar. Called this prediction in episode 5. Imperials took over Mandalore to mine it for beskar. However, the inconsistency of Imperial beskar goes through 3 stages... Stage 1 Intro battle: Imperial Beskar = Beskar (for the most part) Stage 2 Hallway: Imperial Beskar = Regular Old Armor Stage 3 Finale: Imperial Beskar = Wet Tissue Paper

Paz takes out dozens of Beskar Troopers and yet all they can do is hit his armor which keeps him going.

Proof of the complete lack of emotion the show's writers have for these characters. Paz will sacrifice his life, without, "Take care of my son". "Tell my son, I love him". Nothing. What was the point of having Helmet boy be his son?

Moff Gideon captures and keep Din alive just like a carelessly typical James Bond villain would.

Dave Filoni, you can write this "stuff", but you cannot sell it.

Audiences assumed there would be spies among the Mandos, like the title suggests. Nope! Prepare for disappointment in the finale.

This show is beyond saving. It's a Disney cash grab without any substance. The only parts of interest is the stuff trying to set up for future projects, but even this is not worth the time.

The Mandalorian: Chapter 21: The Pirate (2023) Season 3, Episode 5

The Only Mandos With Ships Are Din & Bo? Title Should've Been "The Super Easy Barely Minor Pirate Inconvenience"

[1/10 · 10 April 2023]

This show is broken. Season 3 especially, has been riddled with phrases like, "Surely, something pulled Din underwater, he did not just fall in." And "Surely, R5 has been on Tatoonie since A New Hope. It's not he left the planet and was put back." And "Surely, the Mando's have more than 2 ships."

Out of all the Mando's, the two who were outcasts are the only ones with ships?!?!?!

*How did the Mando's travel from Halo City?

*How do they get food and supplies?

*Did none of the new Mandos use a ship to get to this group who are known for secrecy?

*How do they EVEN RECRUIT???

The episode establishes, R5 fought with the Alliance in the Galactic War. The coward droid Din got from Peli on Tatoonie. Last time we saw him prior to this was at Luke's Homestead on Tatoonie in A New Hope. The show is saying, the Alliance acquired him for the war across the the galaxy, but once the war ended they simply put him back on Tatoonie? LOL

The action of the episode is forgettable and generic. Sure, the visuals are good, but it's Star Wars. It's always had great visuals, sound, and production design. Tired of awarding a point for the things Star Wars has always been known for. The only parts I enjoyed most was the Kiwanian monkey-lizard pointing out the pirates to the Mandos. The short time on Coruscant was fine and slightly interesting, but it was too short before we unfortunately returned to Din, Bo, and Grogu. That was it!

Its easy to overlook little issues like continuity errors and dumb actions, when there's an interesting story and characters to be invested in.

A NEW HOPE, Battle of Yavin, any issues like why aren't the Rebels evacuating Yavin? Tend to get overlooked because the audience is invested with what's at stake involving characters I have grown to care about over the past 2 hours. In Mando, you can turn your brain off for little problems, but when it's a sea of problems featuring a story with sort-of characters who are not interesting or in any danger...you will start noticing a plague of issues.

SOME OF THE PROBLEMS WITH THE EPISODE... *Greef ignored Pirates threat in episode 1. No defense was put in place, NO ALARMS.

*New Republic X-Wing pilot is "ONLY NR PILOT" guy.

*Only NR Pilot used R5 to find Din. How did he know R5 was with them? How did R5 know Only NR Pilot knew the Mandos?

*The whole R5 and no other Mandos have ships thing was the nail in the coffin for this disastrous episode.

*There were 70 Mandos in the previous episode. Now we only have about 25.

*Mandos agree to fight so their "children can learn to play in the sunlight." Kids with helmets on 24/7 who get scooped up by monsters.

*The Armorer serves no point to the creed. She's got nothing to say about the matter of fighting. The whole season has been her dodging answers and pretending to be the wise one of this cult.

*The pirates in this are comically bad parodies of the Tortuga pirates in the Pirates of The Caribbean films...

-Kick the server.

-Drink nothing but rum.

-Laugh at nothing and everything.

-Shoot at anything.

POTC was suppose to be comical and satirical, it was re-creating its source...a theme park ride.

At least the pirates achieved their goal of drinking in that school.

BTW...where are all the children? We never see them with the survivors. Assuming they were killed in the pirate invasion.

*Just like Greef, the threatening pirates also have no readied defenses in place.

*Last episode, Mandos could not use jet packs because the loud sound would give away their plans to sneak up on the monster's nest. NOW...they can secretly and quietly rocket down on top of pirates without them knowing.

*Pirates are so easily taken out, they're not even a threat. Maybe, one Mando was killed, maybe? Bo and Din had no trouble destroying multiple fighters and a heavily armed cruiser with only 2 ships. Pirates chasing Din foolishly stop chasing him to instead go for Bo's ship.

*The Armorer uses her forging tools as her battle weapons. Lol

*Din is suddenly a better pilot than Luke, Han, Chewie, Wedge, and Poe. Also, why did Din bring Grogu, a baby, with him into battle? None of the young Mandos are in the battle, but gotta bring the baby with Din.

*"Time to re-take Mandalore".... FROM WHO? It's a planet with air and water, right there for the taking! If Mandalore is so important to them, why in all those years did no one bothered to see if the planet was livable? The Empire claimed it wasn't and they believed them, because the Empire NEVER LIED? Lol

*Space is really really big, and Only NR pilot was cruising around when he just so happen to find a damaged shuttle yards away?!?!?!?

IN A GOOD SHOW.....The X-wing would've spotted a distress signal on the radar, leading them to fly at a faster speed covering a large area to investigate. Searching and looking around until eventually finding the source of the signal. Here he just looks up and...BINGO!

*A shuttle carrying a highly dangerous prisoner went missing and the NR only figured this out when this one pilot accidentally came across the shuttle months later? This is like if Admiral Piett was a prisoner being transported, but only one or two people knew it. There are prisoner logs, ship schedules, bases expecting cargo arrivals. Moff Gideon was rescued on his way for trial. And one ever reported that Moff did not show up for court, to his prison cells, nothing???? It's like the show's writer is so lazy they did not want to actually think out something which makes sense. The New Republic is so bad and dumb at everything, one wonder the First Order took them over so easily.

*This show is incapable of having any long term conflict with some meaningful and insightful impact of the characters. Everything is quickly resolved like it was nothing... Grogu leaves Din to be a Jedi...Done.

Din becoming a Mando again...Done.

Pirate threat in opening episode...They're finally back and Done.

The Dark Saber conflict...Done in the next episode.

CONCLUSION.... This episode, just like the show became more and more unbelievable as it goes. The Mandalorian sucks, it's a terrible show. I love Star Wars, but this apparent flagship show on Disney+ is PAINFUL to watch and hear. The Bad Batch is 100 times better than this. Those who loved The Mandalorian, and can admit to the show's declining season, I feel bad for you. YOU DESERVED BETTER QUALITY THAN THIS.

I finally got my quality Star Wars with Andor. There is no reason for The Mandalorian to be this painfully bad.

The Mandalorian: Chapter 20: The Foundling (2023) Season 3, Episode 4

Mando's Gone From Suck To Blow. 3 Mins of Decent Action Amongst Terrible Writing. Nothing But Bad Decisions From Mandos In Slowest Rescue Ever.

[1/10 · 23 March 2023]

Oh my...Dave Filoni wrote this episode? I'm glad this was only 26 minutes. Outside of 3 mins of Ahmed Best none of this is worth watching or hearing. One decent scene in 30 minutes of pure slug. 1 tiny development and it was for BABY Grogu. Star Wars use to remind us of Akira Kurosawa films, westerns, Saturday morning serials. This episode of The Mandalorian reminded me of Wayne's World, Ace Ventura: When Nature Calls, and Spaceballs. Episode 3 of this season was actually refreshing, interesting, intriguing, and had some the best character development out all three seasons. Now, The Mandalorian is back on a downward spiral with possibly the worst episode yet. Episodes 1 and 2 had not one good scene. Episode 4 does have a decent scene with Ahmed Best, but the rest is so bad, I cannot say it was better than an episode recap or a watching Mando fell and sink in his bath water.

We open with a bizarre training montage. We have gone from only 3 Mando's in Book of Boba Fett, to 35 in the opening of Season 3, to now 70! Where did all these Mando's come from???? Especially when there were only 3 left about a year ago. Wayne's World came to mind with this sequence...."I just always wanted to open a door to room where people are being trained like in James Bond movies."

Helmet Kid was right. Grogu is a baby, with no helmet, and who cannot even talk. Why are these people allowing a BABY to fight???? Someone please call social services on this group. The Jedi were not this insane to allow babies to train in combat. If the show really wants Grogu to fight, then they need him to have accelerated growth like Groot.

Helmet Kid (Jimmy Kimmel's son) is taken and the Mandos clearly state this is not the first kid the monster bird has taken, and no one has been saved or found before. This cult is the worst. The Mando's are a struggling group, yet every giant creature wants to kill them and they take no measures to ensure any one's safety.

There are 70 Mando's and the only one who gets a ship to chase the creature is Bo Katan. She's the only one who thought of using a ship. Then she comes back to get a hunting party. Katan should not have come back. The episode should've been her saving Helmet Kid on her own.

The amount of time they waste to save Helmet Kid was insane. A whole day passes, Helmet Kid is dead. There is no way he's alive.

Suddenly, and out of nowhere Helmet Kid's father is Paz. Yet, Paz showed no emotion when his kid was taken. He refused to open fire on the GIANT monster to save his kid. He was too tired and hungry and decided to make camp for an entire night before saving his son. It's not until they reach the top he reveals this kid is his own. Prior to this, there was nothing to suggest the kid was anything more to him than a Foundling. WORST FATHER, just like Din. Also, you know Paz had to have that helmet on when creating the kid lol. Worst creed ever.

Similar to Ace Ventura: When Nature Calls, the mama bird pukes Helmet Kid up (not making this up) and the kid is somehow alive, despite being in that creature's stomach for several hours maybe a whole day. Yes, this is how mama bird's feed their babies, but this visual was laughably bad. Yes, Din was in a creature's stomach in season 2, but not for hours or an entire day. Boba Fett in the Sarlacc, an adult who has trained and fought his way through the Galaxy. This is a KID with only a helmet for protection...he's dead.

They kill the mama bird, and then kidnapped the baby birds forcing them into slavery. The writers are beyond tone deaf, just like Grogu almost feasting on the eggs of an endangered species.

The only good scene was Ahmed Best chase through Coruscant, which was the best action scene of the season. Why? It wasn't pointless. It made sense and did not feel forced. However, the scene is all action and no character depth. Who is he? Why is Grogu so important in saving? Did he try saving other younglings? Yes, you can look up his name on IMDb but that tells you nothing about him. The only context for the scene is what we've seen in Revenge of The Sith.

In a ten minute span "This Is The Way" is said 6 times. That's double the amount of times "May The Force Be You" is said in the entire OT. Mando should be banned from saying this overused line ever again. Repetitive dialogue is a clear sign of a show running on fumes. There is nothing left in the writing tank for The Mandalorian creative writing team. Din is not even the main character of his own show. Grogu and Bo Katan have bumped him down to a supporting role in this entire season. The Mandalorian has gone from suck to blow.

The Mandalorian: Chapter 19: The Convert (2023) Season 3, Episode 3

The Most Interesting & Intriguing Episode Since Werner Herzog's Scenes. More Character Development Than Mando & Grogu Combined

[6/10 · 16 March 2023]

With now 10 hours of Mando content (Mandalorian & Book of Boba Fett) and.... Finally! The show is actually trying to have some interesting character development. Unfortunately it's not any of the main characters (Mando & Grogu), or any secondary characters, but once again the third party characters. Characters who show up for a couple episodes before disappearing until whenever. Not the first time, ie Mayfeld, and The Client. Now it's Dr. Pershing and Elia. This show does more with third party guest characters, when it does return to Mando & Grogu all I can do is say, "Not this useless guy and baby again." Points and credit to the show for trying. However, the episode is still not good, but halfway decent for once.

For all those who said about episode 2, "Mando did not fall in, something pulled him in." NOPE! This episode confirms from Mando himself, he fell in his bath water. Bo Katan pulled him up and does nothing to revive him. Mando drowned in his helmet, and Bo doesn't even try to give him urgent CPR. This creed sucks!

Next is another pointless action sequence. Looks cool, and I love Tie Interceptors, but it's pointless. What were they doing out there and where did all those fighters and bombers come from? They weren't there to destroy Bo Katan's house because she led all the fighters from space back to her place.

Then we get 40 minutes of the most INTERESTING and INTRIGUING material in Mando since Werner Herzog's scenes in season 1. Character development, motivations, goals, conflicts, internal struggles, intentions are for good but could mean evil, consequences. BASIC STORYTELLING 101.

Even though the episode is still loaded with dumb content and problems, there's far less of it when all the focus is on Dr. Pershing and Elia. We're at 10 hours of Mando, and in 1 episode Dr. Pershing has more character than Mando and Grogu combined!

Baby Yoda fans hated this episode.... "Where's Mando and Grogu?" "What's Andor doing in my show?" "Love the action and ending, hated the 40 minute middle."

This episode is intriguing. Unfortunately its Mando and Baby Yoda fans only want "pew, pew, pew", and Grogu spinning in a chair looking all cute. They don't care about story, characters, arcs, payoffs, intelligence...basic storytelling 101. Which is a massive shame. With this fan base, this show will never be good. This episode was a shimmer of that. Thankfully, Andor is a great show and will not sink to the same depths as Mando did on Mandalore.

The Mandalorian: Chapter 17: The Apostate (2023) Season 3, Episode 1

FACT: Andor Was Quality Star Wars Storytelling, & Mando Is Not Quality, Its Stuff. "There Are Only 3 Of Us Left" in BOBF. Now There's Suddenly 40 Mandalorians?

[2/10 · 3 March 2023]

When a show has a good story to tell, it's easy to overlook any and all the problems in the content. Example, most audiences went decades without noticing the Stormtrooper smacking their helmet on a blast door in Star Wars. Why? Audiences were so caught-up in the story most did not see it. The Mandalorian, episode 1 of season 3, there's no story here, just stuff involving people hitting their helmets against blast doors while a baby is doing cute background stuff.

This was the worst episode of The Mandalorian yet. A 25 minute recap of The Book of Boba Fett for those who did not see it, and filler for this opening third season. Basically, let's see who's going to be a vital character in this season and where these characters are. That's it. Mando's journey in seasons 1 & 2 are undone. Grogu, a baby, is back and goes with him everywhere. Including battle, and the most dangerous areas for a baby to be in. The show's creators and writer have clearly sold out any original plans of focusing on a bounty hunter who's out for his own benefit no matter his morals, to instead focus entirely on Baby Yoda. Can we please get more Andor, a show with actual quality writing and direction?

The Mandalorian is like the character of Finn. A great compelling start/set-up for a SW character, only to end up going nowhere and just being another "dude/guy". Din Djarin is not the focus of this own show, Baby Yoda is. When Din speaks to Greef, we are constantly cutting away from the conversation to focus on Grogu spinning in a chair and using the force to eat candy. Baby Yoda did cute things before, but for filler scenes of comedy when they were needed. Now its done over dialogue pertaining to any sort of plot this show is trying to establish.

What is most sacred to Mando? His creed of being a mandalorian. Many months to almost a year have passed since he was kicked out and Mando has not yet gone to the mines of Mandalore to redeem his honor? His creed is everything to him, and he would've gone right away following the events of BOBF.

The opening scene was an absolute disaster. Watched The Book of Boba Fett only one time and I remember Paz Vizsla telling Din Djarin, "There are only 3 of us left". Now there are suddenly well over 3 dozen mandalorians? Jon Favreau wrote both. The mandalorians are snuck up upon by a massive crocodile which was hiding in water shallower than its actual size. The mandalorians unnecessarily fighting the massive crocodile despite the fact there is a deep cave behind them which they can all easily hide in and protect themselves in. They could easily run away, and most of them could easily jet pack away. The fight was completely pointless and cost precious mandalorian lives. They try killing the crocodile by attaching grenades to its outside skin, when they should've tried throwing grenades inside its giant mouth which is always opened. Also, the kid's mandalorian helmet looked like a cheap plastic toy helmet, which for some odd reason makes the Darth Vader air lock sound effect.

One of the main conflicts of the episode involves space pirates which begins with them upset they cannot drink inside a school. Again, pirates demand they should be allowed to drink inside a children's school while children are learning Aurebesh. Jon Favreau wrote this unintentional comedy. The pirates want their town back, a town which has no heavy defenses. Instead of attacking the town, they go after Mando. Chasing him down in his N1 starfighter until their capital ship, captained by space Davey Jones who has full target lock on him with all guns. Mando easily escapes by flying straight at them very fast. That's not how target lock works. Make it creative, inventive, exciting, just like the space battle with Luthen in the far better show Andor. Also, before this happens, Mando is teaching a baby how to fly a starfighter. Again, Grogu is a 50 year old baby. Almost certain at this point, Grogu will forever be a baby.

They pulled another Rise of Skywalker with bringing IG-11 back. The droid who self-destructed while standing in a river of lava. There was apparently enough of him left to taxidermy the remains into a statue. Instead of crafting a statue of Kuiil to honor his fallen sacrifice, they honor the droid. Mando is able to bring the droid back, which no one else tried, only to discover he needs a new memory circuit which are hard to come by for this model of droid. No way are these droids this obsolete in this vast universe. Also, that's not how memory circuits and data work. IG-11 blew-up into a fireball on lava. All his memories and data would be fried way beyond the point of saving. I'm not a computer technician and I know this.

This is only the first episode of the new season, after seeing Din Djarin's journey in the first 2 season completed. Which is why it's vital to establish the journey and direction this season will go down. This episode promises nothing but the same old Baby Yoda show, but worse. Andor reset the bar of quality when it comes to telling a story in the Star Wars universe, and it deserves full praise for being one of the best written scripts in the Star Wars franchise. When The Mandalorian first aired it was at the end of the disastrous sequel trilogy. The bar was so low for Star Wars, this gave The Mandalorian an edge for attracting audiences. Now, that edge has run out, and all that's left is a show with nothing but Baby Yoda and his sidekick "guy" babysitter.

Jurassic World Dominion (2022)

BORING & Laughably Bad. They Made Jurassic Park 3 Tolerable Compared To This.

[1/10 · 15 January 2023]

"Now eventually you might have dinosaurs in your dinosaur movie now, right?" Watched the Extended Cut which included scenes involving dinosaurs, all cut theatrically. Including T-Rex drive-in attack.

A Jurassic movie about dinosaurs and it's painfully boring. People criticized Lucas for having a lot of walking and talking in the SW prequels, but the prequels are no where near as boring as this one Jurassic World film. If you watched the extended cut, you'll get a few more dinosaurs scenes. Not many, but it's something.

"There have never been more dinosaurs, than there are in Dominion. Maximum amount" -Bryce Dallas Howard.

Was there anything good in this? They finally brought back the Dilophosaurus. That's it. Now, for everything else...

Since 1993, I have seen every Jurassic film in theaters. However, because of how bad Fallen Kingdom was and how poorly received Dominion was, this marked this first Jurassic film I skipped seeing in the theater. I have no regrets about this decision. The Jurassic World trilogy goes the same route as the sequel trilogy. Started off decent, but was then followed up with two painfully bad sequels. Almost like there was no roadmap throughout the JW trilogy. However, I actually think they had one planned after the first JW film. If so, they should've hired better writers. Colin was probably one of the worst filmmakers in re-sparking Spielberg and Crichton's Jurassic series. Those who think Colin's Episode 9 "Duel of The Fates" would've been good or better than TROS, look no further than his JW trilogy for that answer.

Another big issue with the film. I did not care about anything going on, or for the Jurassic World characters. Colin ran out of ideas and ended up recreating the T-Rex battle from the first JW as the finale, and it's completely pointless just like this film. In the dumbest way possible, they even gave life to the Jurassic logo. Dinosaurs are roaming the earth and it's treated in a "just live with it" approach, I was actually wishing this world would get destroyed from its stupidity. The threat of dinosaurs escaping to the mainland in Michael Crichton's books was a real nightmarish threat that he captured in the most terrifying ways. I have tremendous love and respect for life without a human voice, but Dominion's acceptance of a world with dinosaurs which wasn't the result of nature's intention but instead human/clone girl error is treated similar to the story in a children's pop-up book.

The main conflict is about...locus. That's right! Not dinosaurs, but locus and farm crops. What is a plot about locus and the world's food supply doing in the Jurassic film where dinosaurs are physically roaming the earth? The Jurassic series is science fiction, and maybe a central conflict of a company releasing giant locus to threaten the world's food supplies might work in another story. To have a locus conflict this late in the series as the final built-up conflict was tragic. The build-up and cliffhanger in JW2 was dinosaurs are free to roam and terrorize the mainland. This should be the focusing conflict of your trilogy's finale. What were these filmmakers thinking?

Lewis Dodgson is the character I always wished would return in the Jurassic sequels. A key sideline villain in Crichton's JP novel, and the main villain in Crichton's The Lost World novel. Dodgson finally returns, only he now looks like the CEO of Apple which is ABSOLUTELY DREADFUL.

Was I suppose to picture Skyfall and The Bourne Ultimatum in the action sequences of a Jurassic film? No, but I was because the chase scene in the middle of the film was riddled with James Bond and Jason Bourne material. Remember how Pratt could hold up his hand with the raptors and it would trigger something in them? A move he'd been doing since they were babies. Let's call it, the Force, because now anyone can do it on any random dinosaur and it will hold them off, just like the Force. The film's stupidity has gone interstellar.

Riddled with action cliches, excessive contrivances, conflict cliches, predictable outcomes, repeating visuals which no longer dazzle us, a complete lack of tension and terror, zero excitement, call backs to better films which have already been done in the previous Jurassic World films. Nothing is fresh, and what remains is stale. The film even damages its own trilogy by acknowledging characters and events in JP3, while forgetting there is another island called Site B with lots of dinosaurs roaming it.

Remember the magic, the wonder, the awe, the thrills, the horrors, the excitement of Jurassic Park? All of this gone. Lost to a bunch of filmmakers who think bigger and more dinosaurs is all that matters rather than script and characters. The Lost World recaptured these elements the best. Even JP3 got some elements right when none of JW sequels did. I actually thought Fallen Kingdom was the lowest these Jurassic World films could go. Unfortunately, I was wrong. Dominion falls on the same level of bad as Fallen Kingdom did, but it might actually be worse. Dominion, just like The Last Jedi and Indy 5, is a franchise killer.

Andor (2022– )

THE BEST STAR WARS IN YEARS WITH QUALITY STORYTELLING & SUBSTANCE!

[9/10 · 26 December 2022]

Those hating and complaining that Andor is boring and too slow, are the same people who complained about Sean Bean's outcome in Game of Thrones. Since The Last Jedi, I've look down on Disney Star Wars as a consistent dumpster fire of disappointment. The only great content being Rogue One and the last 4 episodes of The Clones Wars. The Sequel Trilogy was a completely avoidable unplanned disaster. Solo, was a unnecessary and pointless cash grab. The Mandalorian, not bad or terrible, but overrated mediocrity, now shifting more focus on Baby Yoda than Mando. The Book of Boba Fett was a complete embarrassment. Obi-Wan Kenobi was an absolute insult and is neck-and-neck with The Last Jedi for the worst of the Disney Star Wars bunch.

Now we have Andor and.... FINALLY! More Star Wars films & content like this.....PLEASE!

Andor could very well be the best Star Wars we've gotten in last 40 years. Smart, intelligent, dark/gritty, well-structured plots, expansive world building, entertaining, great action, characters with planned out arcs and developments, GOOD STORYTELLING, and the Empire is once again THE ACTUAL EMPIRE. Unlike all the previous rushed SW sludge from Disney, surprisingly found myself heavily invested in the characters of Andor without having to rely on familiar names, faces, and masks. The only Original Trilogy character we get is Mon Mothma. From Rogue One, Andor and Saw Gerrera. Everyone else is new and fleshed out. The heart of Andor is a story focusing on exploring the people of the SW universe. Unlike the Sequel Trilogy, I actually care about these characters. Even the main droid (B2EMO) is fleshed out and given characteristics with a well thought out place in the story. All which had me caring about him. The characters are relatable, flawed, likable, and have the right level of mystery without becoming just another JJ "mystery box". There are believable consequences to the characters for their actions. Pain is inflicted, blood is spilled. Basic character structures which were absent in almost all of Disney Star Wars are here. Featuring some of the best performances you'll ever see in SW. Diego Luna, Stellan Skarsgard, Fiona Shaw are all stellar. Genevieve O'Reilly is also a great stand out in her reprisal of Mon Mothma. Every performance goes above and beyond any and all expectations. Also, Andy Serkis shows up and steals the show in his episodes. Thrilled to see Disney making it up to Andy for Rian Johnson's mis-handling of Snoke by giving Andy a non-CGI performance. Andor also has the fortunate charm of being the first SW streaming show to be filmed on physical exterior locations, and not entirely filmed on the overly used "The Volume" sound stage. The action scenes are well-planned, crafted and executed with old school professional filmmaking.

It gives me great joy to announce the Empire in Andor rightfully returns to its dominating, competent, intelligent, dangerous and threatening presence. A key component and detail in A New Hope and pushed further in The Empire Strikes Back. I was surprised to see Stormtroopers/Imperials not only actually shoot and hit their targets, but able to kill characters. Watching and listening to the Empire be an effective and intelligent governing power was such a welcoming relief. The screaming and uncontrollable First Order in the sequels lacked any simplistic display of a governing supremacy. Key great Imperial performances come from Denise Gough and Anton Lesser. THANK YOU TONY GILROY for bringing back the Empire.

Andor is Star Wars content in the SW universe, but remains impressively selective when it comes to using SW nostalgia. The show refrains from being another sell-out jammed with Tie Fighters, X-Wings, Tatoonie, Lightsabers, Star Destroyers, cute future Baby Yoda toy, and dozens of unnecessary character cameos in every episode. The SW universe feels and looks BIG and VAST again. The world building is genuine and innovating. Andor is loaded with SW material, but none of it feels forced or out-of-placed. No key jangling here. The show could've easily opened with shots of the Death Star being built to get the attention of simple SW fans very early on, but doesn't. More importantly, the show runners know they don't need to do this style of baiting.

Some viewers have complaints about Andor being too slow and very poorly paced. BS, Andor actually focuses more on setting up story and characters, and the big action sequences come as the payoffs about two episodes later. The pacing can move slowly from time-to-time, but it's no different than Game of Thrones pacing when that show was great.

If you're looking for over-the-top goofy rushed Star Wars cash grab content, this is not it. Trust me, there is more than enough of that SW content out there on Disney+. This is Star Wars, without being basic generic modern day Star Wars. Andor has the ability into tricking you into thinking this is not Star Wars, largely due to all the thought and effort put into well-developed stories and characters, and overall tone. Amongst the serious tone, it's still entertaining and fun, and able to avoid being plagued with the never ending Marvel-like comedy. Andor is not out to wow audiences in the wrong ways. If you were "wowed" by Obi-Wan and Vader fighting again in the Kenobi show, or "wowed" by Cade Bane showing up in Boba Fett, or "wowed" by the dark saber being in Mandalorian, then you might struggle understanding that Andor's "wowed" factor is quality and competent storytelling. Tony Gilroy has done the impossible. Proven there can still be great writing and film content with the Star Wars license. The downside for Andor was timing. Being released after Obi-Wan Kenobi was the worst time. History repeated itself as SW fans lost interest and hope in Disney SW streaming content. Andor fell victim to the same outcome as Solo did following The Last Jedi. TLJ was so damning, no one cared to see a mediocre Han Solo movie. Even I had no interest and refused to watch Andor after the awful disgust the Kenobi show left. However, I was wrong and will own up to this. Andor is great and a breath of a fresh air in Disney Star Wars. Had this show been released after Rogue One and before Mandalorian, this would've gotten the same attention and love from audiences. When it comes to the SW shows, I've only watched each SW show in-full one time. Andor has not been the case, and I am considering a third watch of the full first season and I'm thrilled to death we still have at least one more season to go. Tony Gilroy has given SW fans something very genuine and unique. Star Wars with guts and a lot of brains.

MORE ANDOR PLEASE! #FireKathleenKennedy.

Obi-Wan Kenobi (2022)

This One Show Wrecks SW Storylines, Characters, & Lore All For Its Own Inconvenience. An INSULT Without An Identity. Ruins Kenobi, Vader, Bail, Leia, & The Lars.

[1/10 · 19 December 2022]

Good god this show was appallingly bad. The Book of Boba Fett was an embarrassment, but Obi-Wan was an insult. Zero care and effort was made in writing, creating, and making this epic Disney. The show and its creators do not honor the past and its material, they cannot even honor their own creativity. Everything is debased for the audience's cheap shallow pleasure, leaving us with a complete and total failure. The world of Star Wars, it's characters, and it's audience deserve so much better than this cheap Revenge of The Sith wannabe rip-off from Disney and Kathleen's Lucasfilm.

Right off the bat, the show's premise does not work. All Kenobi had to do was NOTHING. Reva kidnapped a 10 year old girl who's not just a princess but the daughter of an Imperial senator. In the eyes of the Imperial senate Reva is a traitor. Her actions would be the groundwork for uprising and war. The Imperials and the senate would demand immediate and swift action in retrieving Leia safely. Reva would be forced to return Leia immediately to avoid conflicts with devastating consequences. Reva's plot driven premise is 100% flawed and bs.

Kenobi went 10 YEARS without hearing the name Darth Vader???? The name of the most feared individual in the galaxy, the emperor's right hand man. All those years and no one at work or in any towns on Tatoonie said around Kenobi, "Did you hear about that Vader guy?" He knows Anakin was renamed Vader in Episode 3. After 10 years Bail never told him, "Vader's alive and well, be on the lookout for him when protecting the last hope for the Jedi and the fate of the galaxy"?

In the tradition of Disney ruining SW, this show has now added Kenobi, Vader, Bail Organa, Leia, and the Lars family to that long list. In the show's cheap Revenge of the Sith.2 ending, Kenobi once again goes to kill Vader but this time he leaves when he clearly has the opportunity to kill Vader for good. In Episode 3, Kenobi left Anakin burning, w/o an arm and w/o both legs, and w/o transportation thinking he would die. This time...he leaves Vader in better shape and with a flyable shuttle. Every death by Vader's hands from this moment on is Kenobi's fault, including Alderaan. What was even the point of these two dueling? Let's also not forget Kenobi abandons Luke on Tatoonie...TWICE!

Bail blindly sends Kenobi a unnecessary message (only exists to create conflict in the plot) randomly detailing Luke's relationship to Anakin, Luke's location on Tatoonie, and a reminder of just how important protection of the children is, which Kenobi and the audience already knew. All this damage from Bail just to point Reva towards Luke for plot and conflict. Bail, would not be this incompetent. Bail randomly sends this to Kenobi but never a message warning him of Darth Vader?

The Lars family. The minute they learn of a Sith warrior who has learned of Luke's real identity is coming to Tatooine, they should leave immediately. If not the planet at the bare minimum they should leave the homestead. If a Sith warrior knows, the Lars should assume someone else would know as well. Someone like Vader or the Emperor.

Vader, rather than letting his Star Destroyer continue to chase down the Rebel ship while he takes off in a shuttle for Kenobi, he lets them go and orders his Destroyer to sit and wait for him to return. He lets an entire spaceship full of rebels escape. Also, Vader would've killed Reva back in Episode 4 for her incompetence. Remember, Vader killed an Admiral for less in TESB.

Leia. Remember A New Hope? Because the writers certainly do not. "General Kenobi. Years ago you served my father in the Clone Wars, now he begs you to help him in his struggle against the Empire." Leia does not know Obi-Wan and outside of her father's past with him has no prior connection to him. If the writers were slightly intelligent, they would have Obi-Wan help Leia without her knowing his true identity. At least this would better suit A New Hope.

FACT.... The writing for this show is a dumpster fire of awful as well as the directing. Seriously, who thought four legs and a trench coat was a "semi-decent" idea? The writing is abysmal. Some of the acting is pretty bad. Reva's performance is painful to watch, as well as the performance for the Grand Inquisitor. Reva is a terrible character. She's out to get Darth Vader for killing all her friends, but for years she commits acts of evil just like Vader. Reva is a selfish, and idiotic character. The action scenes are poorly executed. The Leia chase scenes are an embarrassment. No one gets killed when being stabbed in the gut by a lightsaber. Sure, Kenobi and Vader lightsaber duel again, but even these scenes were poorly executed and have no stakes or risks to them. The choreographed duels look like a fight between to fanboys in cosplay outfits rather than two legendary Jedi warriors. Compared to Bespin, Naboo, Mustafar, the Senate Chambers, the Emperor's Throne Room, locations with ENVIRONMENTS which were used to their fullest potential in lightsaber duels. In Obi-Wan it's dull and without stakes. Also, Vader "trying" to burn Kenobi...THATS NOT HOW FIRE WORKS.

It doesn't shock me that Disney failed to make good Kenobi content, what shocks me to my core is how unwatchable it is No care and effort was put into making Obi-Wan Kenobi. Rather than putting in any original creativity the show stole whole scenes, conflicts, outcomes, and plot points from multiple other prior Star Wars stories, and did so very poorly. Ripping from Revenge of the Sith, A New Hope, The Empire Strikes Back, Rebels, and even Jedi: Fallen Order. It would be something entirely different if it was intelligent callbacks and connections, but instead it's the writers making up for a complete lack of Star Wars creativity. I would rather watch the Star Wars Holiday Special (which is universally hated) than Kenobi. 2 hours of pain is better than these 6 torturing episodes. This Disney cash grab of a show needs to be burned and buried in a deep grave, where it cannot ever again see the light of day.

Obi-Wan Kenobi: Part I (2022) Season 1, Episode 1

Reva's Plan Can Only Work If Kenobi Leaves Tatooine. If He Stayed, Reva Would Be Arrested With Leia Safely Returned

[2/10 · 1 November 2022]

The show's writers were to stupid to realize this...If Kenobi never left Tatooine to rescue Leia, Reva's bizarre plan would've failed with her being arrested by the Empire for kidnapping a senator's daughter. Leia would've been returned to Bail. Reva's plan put the entire Empire at risk, especially the Grand Inquisitor. He would've handed Reva over for punishment. The whole inciting plot only works if Kenobi abandons protecting Luke, which is really hard to believe unless it's for a great reason, which this is not. Kenobi of the George Lucas era would've told Bail to alert the Senate and demand resolution. Reva's actions alone are grounds for war and uprising.

Remember, Leia is the daughter of an Imperial senator. The minute she is kidnapped, Bail should've have informed the Imperial senate that random bounty hunters took her. They would've sent a fleet of troopers to rescue her. There is no reason for the Imperial senate to not rescue a 10 year old princess. As far as they know she is Bail's child.

It'a bad enough Kenobi leaves Luke unprotected on Tatooine. It's up to the writers to come up with a really good reason for Kenobi to leave Tatooine. SPOILER, the writers failed at this, and they'll have Kenobi to do it carelessly TWICE which is beyond insane.

I can see a 3 year old and anyone else whose brain has not fully developed liking Obi-Wan Kenobi. Otherwise, this show is insulting to storytelling and Star Wars. It's barbarically stupid from start to finish.

Obi-Wan Kenobi: Part V (2022) Season 1, Episode 5

Dear, DISNEY Star Wars fans. This show is garbage marketed for adolescents who sell out at the sight of Vader.

[1/10 · 18 June 2022]

Predictable as sin. Anti-climatic. Drastically underwhelming. Poorly directed action scenes...seriously, George Lucas's filming of the battle of Genosis looked far superior. Chow and VFX team cannot accurately frame shots with people and starships. The visual effects end up looking cheap and rushed. Completely lacks a story and interest. Under developed characters...mainly Reva. Continuation of retconning the character of Obi-Wan Kenobi. Rip off of Crait in The Last Jedi, all that was missing was the Crystal Foxes.

The show did not even have the guts to kill Reva. Her plot armor is worse than Mando's. She survived Order 66 and Anakin's lightsaber.... TWICE!!!!!!! The Grand Inquisitor survives one to the gut. Unless your Qui-Gon Jinn, no one dies from a lightsaber stab to the gut anymore.

The Grand Inquisitor stabbed, survived. Reva, stabbed, TWICE, survives every time.

Obi-Wan Kenobi: Part IV (2022) Season 1, Episode 4

The Last Episode Was Bad, But This One Was Worse! The Empire Feels Less SW & More Spaceballs.

[1/10 · 18 June 2022]

How worse? INSULTING! The Book of Boba Fett was a embarrassment. Kenobi is insulting. An insult to one's basic desire for good storytelling, replaced with rushed Disney content. Topped with a series of tweets from Disney declaring the fault lies solely with "toxic fans" prior to this episode even airing, along with a slap from Kathleen Kennedy. This episode makes it crystal clear. The writers, producers, and director ARE NOT TRYING. What a brainless cash grab.

I thought Rose crashing into Finn in The Last Jedi was the dumbest thing in all of Star Wars, but Kenobi trying to sneak Leia out by covering her with a trench coat might just be worse. One, Kenobi skips dressing up in a stormtrooper disguise upon breaking in, even though we have never seen an Imperial with a beard or looking like a dirty bum. Second, Kenobi would not be this dumb to try something this barbarically stupid. Third, there are hundreds of Imperials around them on "high alert", remember the alerts were going off just minutes prior. The Empire is not suppose to be on the same level of idiotic as Spaceballs. The Spaceballs Empire were smarter than these guys.

Remember the great game, Jedi: Fallen Order, the level where you swim into the Imperial compound while a female spy on the inside guides you in, and part of the structure floods and drowns Stormtroopers. You even have a Jedi trying to hold back the cascading sea water with the Force. Yeah, they copy and pasted all that into this one episode because the filmmakers and writers literally ran out of original creative ideas.

Why the hell is Reva interrogating Leia about the whereabouts of the Jedi? Reva would know Leia (a 10 year old) knows nothing about this. How stupid is Reva's character???? She has completely forgotten she was the one who just had Leia kidnapped from her home, and she just witnessed Leia escaping her prison trap with Kenobi to that planet and only arrive in that town with Kenobi a mere hour or two before her and Vader got there.

This show is so bad it pulled a Jaws: The Revenge reference. Kenobi struggles to fight off a cascading wall of water. The water is inches away from him when the blast doors close at the last second. Kenobi emerges bone dry....just like Michael Caine in Jaws: The Revenge. "His shirt is dry!" - Roger Ebert.

Vader arrives angry at Reva for her failure and even though she put a tracker on Leia's droid, VADER WOULD'VE KILLED HER. He killed high ranking officers, including his Admiral for less in The Empire Strikes Back.

Cannot believe I have to say this about a high budget Disney Star Wars show in 2022. The visual effects for the Airspeeder attack were humiliating. They were bad. The framing of them almost made them look photoshopped. I thought they had crashed directly into the hanger at the speed they were going and way they were framed. It's almost like Deborah Chow does not know how to direct an action scene. Wait, she doesn't.

There is absolutely nothing to spoil in Episode 4 of 6 in this series. No character progress, no development, nothing but Leia escaping.

About week prior to this episode Disney tweeted their excitement to seeing Reva's story unfold. 4 episodes down and we have yet to learn anything interesting about her.

Time To Send Disney The Message of Enough Is Enough. It's Time To Cancel Disney+

Obi-Wan Kenobi: Part II (2022) Season 1, Episode 2

Obi-Wan went 10 YEARS without hearing the name Darth Vader????

[2/10 · 6 June 2022]

Darth Vader...The name of the most feared individual in the galaxy, next to Emperor Palpatine. This whole time, when Kenobi was at work or in Mos Eisley no one around him ever said, "Did you hear about that Vader guy?" This is a futuristic world where news does not travel.

So far this show is as bad as The Book of Boba Fett. At this point, I am only watching it for Ewan McGregor. Young Leia, who I thought might be promising, is now annoying. Reva continues to be a terribly written and directed character. Rupert Friend's performance as the Grand Inquisitor is cringe. The chase scenes involving Leia are laughably bad and possibly the worst chase scenes in Star Wars. At the rate Disney is handling Star Wars, it's time to pull the plug and cancel Disney+

It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia: Sweet Dee Has a Heart Attack (2008) Season 4, Episode 10

Contains the best scene in the show's run...so far.

[10/10 · 3 March 2022]

Is this the "Best" episode of IASIP? No, but the episode is brilliantly written, as well as filled with a lot of clever jokes and gags. Especially when paying homage to One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest, the film which got launched DeVito's career. However, the infamous conspiracy rant from Charlie about the mail is hands down the funniest sequence in IASIP. The timing. The song choice is dare I say better than it's use in Ferris Bueller. The clever use of names, "Pepe Silvia"...Pennsylvania? "Carol HR"...Care of HR? And then the whole Barney as Charlie's source for the conspiracy kills me every time. CLASSIC!

The Book of Boba Fett: Chapter 7: In the Name of Honor (2022) Season 1, Episode 7

Favreau, writer and creator of this episode of stupidity is to blame.

[2/10 · 13 February 2022]

The blame does not fully fall on Rodriguez. He did not write any of the episodes. He was handed the script and filmed what was written by the writer, Jon Favreau. Did Rodriquez do a great job? Absolutely not. I wish the problem was only colorful speeders and ridiculous looking spins, but when scenes call for Boba and Mando to get shot over and over and over, or for Peli to show up with Grogu w/o hearing the war in town, or Cyberpunk girl convincing Boba to fight in town and not at the palace....that's all on Favreau's writing. Boba giving up his right idea to fight at Jabba's palace where they can see everything around them and instead go with the cyberpunk girl's idea of fighting from inside a blown up bar where they cannot see who or what is coming at them was beyond barbarically stupid. Really wanted all those cyberpunk kids to die, as well as Peli. She shows up with Grogu without hearing any of the dozens of loud explosions in town? All shots only hit beskar on Mando and Fett, which Fett has a lot less of compared to Mando. The Wookie is the weakest fighting Wookie ever. Instead of running all the way back to Jabba's palace for Slave 1, a highly effective fighter ship which has shields, can deal high amounts of heavy damage, and can take a great amount of damage, instead Boba gets his Rancor which has no shields, no firepower, no armor except for some thick skin to battle against giant droids. Again Favreau wrote all this.

Overall: Book of Boba Fett is a 3/10.