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Old Henry (2021)
Low-budget Indie Western Outdoes Mainstream Hollywood
"Old Henry" is a 2021 indie western film starring Tim Blake Nelson, Scott Haze, Gavin Lewis, Trace Adkins, and Stephen Dorff. The plot revolves around the titular character of Henry, an old, rugged farmer with a teenage son. Together live on a lonely farmstead in the Oklahoma Territory during the 1800s. Their lives are mundane and simple...that is, until a horse wearing a bloodied saddle makes its way over the hill to their farm. After a bit of searching, Henry discovers the horse's owner lying face down in the dirt, a bullet embedded in his chest. Nearby the unconscious man is a pistol and a satchel full of money - a bag of money that causes Henry to question the man's identity.
Shortly after bringing the wounded man home and tying him to his son's bed, Henry is confronted by a group of three lawmen on horseback. They claim to be searching for a wounded bank robber claiming to be a sheriff, and they ask Henry if he has seen the man they are looking for. Unsure of who to believe, Henry is forced to try and determine whether the so-called sheriffs are telling the truth or if the man hidden inside his house truly is innocent.
Full of twists and turns during its final act and graced with both a skilled cinematographer and a talented cast, *Old Henry* is one of the few Western films to be released in theaters in recent years. It is, however, a good one - the film, despite being low budget and simplistic plot wise, manages to be entertaining for over an hour and a half. Although the characters are not necessarily lovable, the tense plot makes up for the overall bleak and grim nature of the story and the acting of the entire cast is top notch - especially for a low budget film.
The least believable actor in the movie is, oddly enough, Stephen Dorff, who recently made headlines after calling Scarlett Johansson's "Black Widow" an embarrassment. Nevertheless, Dorff is known for being picky about the projects he signs on to, and "Old Henry" is no exception. The script is fairly tight, the action is brutal and energetic, and despite its few flaws, it stands as a good solo film worth watching more than once. I definitely recommend seeing it in theaters as opposed to streaming it at home - it only has a limited release and has only made around $35,000 at the box office.
I give it a solid 7.5 out of 10.
The Prince of Egypt (1998)
A 7.1 is far too low for this great of a film.
"Prince of Egypt" is, without a doubt, one of my favorite animated films of all time, both artistically and emotionally. It is a compelling, mature, respectful, yet invigorating drama for all ages and is one of the few films that I can safely say has made me openly cry for than six times in one sitting. I was recently blessed with the opportunity to see it at my local theater and although I am biased due to the fact that I first viewed this film when I was around seven years old, it not only holds up but is even better when viewed in the theater. If you have the option, of course opt for the theater experience. However, if you're like most people, simply track this film down on Hulu and watch it - it is well worth the hour and a half it takes to experience it.
The music ranges from raw and passionate to fun, catchy, and delightful to listen to. It's a film that utilizes both its soundtrack and its musical numbers to serve the story rather than to make it appealing towards kids, and it works perfectly. In fact, part of the reason this film works is that it doesn't only target children as its demographic - it serves as a solid retelling of a beloved yet brutal Bible story that, like the beginning of the movie states, is believed by millions of people across the globe. If the songs are what turn you off on whether to see this movie or not, don't let it - they are some of the best parts of the film and none are cheesy or "comedic" like in most Disney film.
I'd also like to point out that this is one of the few animated movies to play out in an almost entirely serious manner - while there are a few gags here and there, they are never reoccurring, nor are they distracting from the overall majesty of the film. This is a very grand yet oftentimes disturbing film - while not inappropriate for children, it tells the story of how a man freed an entire race of slaves through the power of God alone. One would think a mainstream animation company would screw this sort of story up by making it funny, but they don't, and that's fantastic - it really makes the scenes feel "real" to the viewers and it gives the source material the sense of respect it deserves.
All in all, this is a fantastic movie and I'd venture to say that pretty much everyone could benefit from watching it. It has some pretty good lessons to be learned and it's surprisingly educational when it comes to the Bible and the details that people often miss.
Last Christmas (2019)
Jumbled yet overall light and surprisingly deep
There's a lot to love in "Last Christmas" and there's also a lot to question. Some parts of the film are downright weird while others may lead audiences to laugh, cry, or even contemplate their own lives.
Many scenes came off as attempting to possess "quirky humor" only to fall flat. Others serve as nothing more than fluff to pad the film's runtime. Michelle Yeoh's scenes were particularly heinous - although she does a fantastic job in "Crazy Rich Asians," she is definitely miscast in this film. There is also an abundance of seemingly unnecessary auto-tune applied to the in-film singing performances, though that may be simply there to compensate for Emilia Clarke's voice. That being said, it doesn't seem too manufactured, which leads me to believe that leaving her voice alone would have been the better option. Tom actual actions are also slightly creepy throughout the first part of the film - something the protagonist herself acknowledges yet never seems to actually address through her actions.
That being said, for what the film lacks in actual substance, it makes up for in heart. The film is ultimately an optimistic one for the most part, teaching audiences to better themselves through lessons I won't spoil. The plot twist is also exceptionally unique and is something I would not have expected had the movie not been spoiled for me. There's also a certain admiration I have to have for the film due to its depiction of a lead woman who isn't perfect - in fact, she's lazy, selfish, and suffering from a myriad of mental health problems that quite literally drive her to drinking. As a result, there are some really touching moments and some much-appreciated emotional scenes that really make this movie outshine its rougher scenes. And yes, I did shed a few tears, though that happens a lot when I watch movies.
All in all, this makes for a good Christmas movie for older teens and adults. It has some crude anatomical jokes and some sexual implications and references, but beyond that is a fairly clean and feel-good film for those who can handle its bumps.
TL;DR - It's not perfect, but at least it's optimistic and has a unique twist!
A Star Is Born (2018)
A tragic tale that many don't seem to understand
If you're looking for a movie about a healthy relationship, you shouldn't be watching this movie. This was never supposed to be about healthy, non-toxic people. It's depicting two well-intentioned people being hurt by the world. The film itself is wonderfully made and deals with its subjects in a respectful, thoughtful tone.
The music is outstanding, and both Lady Gaga and Bradley Cooper shine during their performances. It's also impressive that both of them manage to sell the soundtrack without the aid of the ever obnoxious auto-tune found in other movie musicals made in recent years. The cinematography is also top-notch and effectively conveys they story. There's nothing particularly special about it, but that doesn't matter - what matters is that the story is told clearly and emotionally.
Basically, ignore the hate comments. There's a lot of people who didn't want this movie to succeed simply because "Venom" came out on the same weekend. There's also a lot of people who are frustrated with this movie simply because it doesn't play into idealistic stereotypes like they want it to. The only real arguments one can make here is that the film focuses too much on the male character and drags out a little too long. Go check it out!
Dummy (2020)
How do I begin to describe this...
I had a free trial of Quibi intended for The Fugitive and my stupid brain told me "this is raunchy, you should watch it." I really regret it. It's not like it ruined my life or anything but it was just... gross. And immoral, even for Hollywood.
The best thing about this show by far is the doll. She's funny...ish. It depends on what situation she's in. The best times consist of her rocking out with the protagonist, whether it be in the car or in the dumpster behind her boyfriend's house. However, there are times that I just sat there and went "what the heck?" The rubber genitals as a necklace? Really? The "scrub her out" jokes? I get that I knew what I was getting into but for the life of me, I didn't really think it could get worse. It did.
SPOILER ALERT:
There's a part where our lovely protagonist Cody tries to get her fourteen years old neighbor to sleep with the doll. I don't know what planet you have to live on to find that funny, but honestly, it's borderline sexual harassment of some kind. I don't know what type, but seriously...if I was the mom, I'd be calling the cops. What's even more disturbing is that although the show depicts the act as creepy, it tries to pass it off as at least somewhat acceptable due to Cody's unique situation.
END OF SPOILER!
I ended up listening/watching to the end anyway because I had come so far but...yeah. Gross stuff. It's a quirky, unique show that doesn't ever justify its existence. The humor is occasionally alright. This doesn't deserve an Emmy by any chance.
Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat (1999)
Great music, great singing, but ultimately inappropriate for families.
Undoubtedly fun and creative, but disappointingly sexual, Andrew Lloyd Webber has done it again and created yet another fantastic musical that while great may cause parents to think twice before plopping down on the couch with their children to watch it.
The music itself is this movie's selling point, of course. Despite the fact that it can often be repetitive and unmemorable in a few spots, there really isn't anything wrong with any of it. It never sounds auto-tuned and most of the songs are simply fun to listen to. There are even a few that reach greatness, and each of the singers nail their parts to a "t."
The sets are also whimsical and fun. Although low budget when compared to more cinematic musical movies, the set designers demonstrate their talent during the film's fantastical "Egypt" scenes. The stylization works surprisingly well, and it's all around fun to see what the set design will pull next.
Now for the negatives. This show's biggest problem is the costumes. The wigs are atrocious and the outfits on a good 75% of the women leave much to be desired. Whoever decided that a children's musical should be populated by women wearing skin tight flesh colored suits revealing their rear ends and glitter pasties to stand in as nipples needs to be officially fired and given a harsh talk about making family friendly productions. Although there are sexual wink-winks here and there in the script itself, the sexual aspect is cranked up to 100% real fast by what basically can be described as a somewhat non-explicit orgy including the sexual harassment of a young man. Butts are touched, clothes are forcibly removed, and it's all around not appropriate for children at ALL, let alone the children depicted in the movie's young audience.
Minor smoking also occurs.
That being said, it's a fun watch. Unfortunately, it's also a sadly inappropriate one. Best to leave this for the adults and older teens to enjoy, though I would recommend fast forwarding through Mrs. Potiphar's shenanigans - trust me when I say, not many people are going to forget that sequence any time soon, and not in a good way.
Prison (1987)
A Fun Product of It's Time
There are many spoilers in this review. While nothing is described in detail, the general outcomes of certain plots are talked about. You have been warned!
"PRISON" (1987), as many others have stated, is a fun product of its time. Though full of stereotypes and some downright semi racist content towards the end, the film showcases the best of 80's horror pulp - the dashing young "bad boy" with little to no distinguishable flaws, the beautiful young woman who initially comes off as independent but ultimately relies on the hero to get the job done, and gruesome deaths similar to those seen in the original "FRIDAY THE 13th." People swear, people die, people scream, and the scary ghost emerges to carry out his revenge on those responsible for his untimely death. There's even the practical explosion effects commonly used during that time period - you know you're watching an 80s or 90s movie when electricity can cause a door to explode.
Filmed in a real-life abandoned prison, "PRISON" has a lot going for it - a charismatic cast, a superb special effects department, and a complete lack of irritating CGI that now dominates the movie world. As a result, the highlights by far are the real-life location and the explosions and special effects themselves.
While Viggo Mortenson does an alright job portraying the generally bland protagonist, his character is easy to root for in that he never seems to do anything wrong. He's the car thief with a heart of gold - an easy character to write in that his character is completely devoid of complications, including his past. In many ways, this adds a certain bizarre air of mystery around his character - oddly enough, he's fascinating because the audience knows so little about him. Unfortunately, the mystery eventually wears off, and more critical viewers are likely to see the lack of character development fairly early on.
Sadly, the rest of the characters don't fare much better - Chelsea Field's character is given little to no characterization, something that comes off as a shame considering her promising entrance and personality. She could have been another true feminist gem of the 80's; a character held in respect among the likes of Princess Leia and Ellen Ripley. Sadly, she never gets to truly take the situation into her own hands, instead allowing Viggo's character to swoop in and save her, despite the fact that he's, well...a prison inmate.
The rest of the characters are regrettably forgettable and dry thanks to better films such as "THE SHAWSHANK REDEMPTION." As stated above, character development doesn't really exist in this movie, leading to cookie-cutter characters set in front of a fascinating backdrop, clouded by impressive visuals meant to distract the audience from the lack of actual backstories or character arcs. While it may be fun to watch, it's not something you'll often think of after viewing.
Furthermore, for anyone who knows a lick about the prison system or real life in general, this movie will either amuse or frustrate you. Perhaps both. The opening scene alone depicts an execution so ridiculously inaccurate, yours truly laughed out loud upon my first viewing.
NCIS: Naval Criminal Investigative Service: Road Kill (2008)
This episode stuck with me for years
I believe I first watched this when I was around 14 or 15. I'm 19 now and just revisited the episode after some friends encouraged me to rewatch the show. I now remember why this episode stuck in my memory far longer than all the others from season six - it's because it was the first episode to genuinely make me cry.
The story is absolutely heartbreaking, and Brian Letscher's performance in this episode made me want to see him again on the show. Unfortunately, things like that almost never happen, as the cast outside of NCIS itself is usually disposable and changes by the episode. That being said, he's a blessing to the show when he is on screen, and he does a good job at earning pity points from the audience through his excellent acting.
Of all things, the makeup is particularly phenomenal in this episode, and it makes me really wonder how they pulled that off.
All in all, it's a great episode that deserves a lot more attention as I wasn't able to find a single photo from it online. It's a hidden gem in a series that has gone for an extremely long time, and it's sad to me that most NCIS fans won't get to see it. I fully recommend if you're up for a bit of a tear-jerker.
Cats (2019)
It's Different, Therefore It's "Bad?"
There's literally nothing wrong with this movie. It's just a good movie. Aside from the animation worsening a bit on cats in the corners of the screen, the film is well executed, the singing is phenomenal, and people are just hating on this because they want to, and to me, that's really sad. This was someone's dream and audiences are stomping all over it. Hopefully it continues to make money from people who go see it with an open mind, but unfortunately, it it isn't Disney, it is being pounded into the ground for taking risks and being weird. Heck, even when Disney does do something weird, it's never truly weird, and I'm sick and tired of people blasting anything they find different just because it's different. Beautiful music, beautiful acting, beautiful casting, and beautiful choreography aren't enough for people anymore. Not even for a movie that's essentially one giant dream, scary bits and all.
Ghost Stories (2017)
A Perfect Halloween-time Film
Without going into too much detail, "Ghost Stories" may seem like a mediocre fright fest at first full of serviceable jump scares and "confusing-for-the-sake-of-being-confusing" plot developments. However, it's the end that really hits home - keep watching. You'll be glad you did!