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Rebel Moon - Part One: A Child of Fire (2023)
A shiny candy shell without any filling.
From the trailers the imagery looked OK. I wanted this to be good. But that was it. A very disappointing XMas present. Actually watching this derivative piece of shallow trash was 2 hours of my life wasted.
The characters were simply molded from the usual tropes, so predictable and dull. It was difficult to know which one I wanted to die first but sadly they don't. Shallow, insipid, derivative and with wooden acting.
And then there's the plot. I'm still convinced most of the decent writers died during the writers strike about 10 years ago and this boring trash reinforces my belief. It shows in this trivial and predicable piece of drivel. Feeding a giant space ship with food from one small struggling villiage growing crops by hand? WTAF, was the writing doing drugs when they wrote this? Soooo, so many illogical aspects to the worlds/characters/action scenes, just everything. Did someone actually get paid to write this? Character interactions were just cringey, shallow and in most situations pointless. The stereotypical bad guys were bad but by the end I was rooting for them, hoping the protagonists would all die from their ineptitude before killing themselves and there won't be sequel.
The 2 stars I begrudgingly give it are for the pretty graphics and the ex-war robot who easily had the best character and was at least interesting. Hopefully the writers kill off all the humans, and sack the actors, in the first 2 minutes of the sequel and swap the plotline to that of the sole robot who had more empathy, interest and character than the entire human cast. I can see why Hollywood feels threatened by AI if this is the best they can do.
How the hell did this trash get made?
The Net 2.0 (2006)
First movie in 40 years to not bother seeing the ending...
If you saw the Net and liked it (or even barely stand it), please don't watch this. The plot is appalling, the camera work shocking, acting tragic and the people who made this movie have never used a computer in their life nor traveled overseas on business. Once it got to the scene where her super little program (typed in on the fly, complete with GUI)cracks a password, that was it...STOP. Up until that point the lead character verged on truly inane with bizarre behavior. Stuck in a foreign country (by yourself, no list of contacts...go figure?, it is 2006!) you would decide to do the James Bond act rather than contact authorities? Yep! Acepting dodgy documents, leaving other documents behind, traveling by yourself as a twenty something white female in Turkey, not having fanny bug with emergency money, contacts ID, visa etc? Is this meant to be believable? And the techy/computer crap?? It was so bad I was hoping that in some bizarre twist the person responsible for technical believability of the movie appeared in it and was tortured to death. It was wrong on so many accounts..I cringed and wanted to hide my eyes. Life is too short to waste watching this abortion of a movie. ..and that annoying stop/go camera action, the scene cuts, the lack of continuity, it goes on and on but luckily DVD players have a stop and eject button. Use them here.