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Reviews
The League of Gentlemen (1960)
An excellent, well written, well acted film that reminds us of the value of quality.
The beginning of this low-key film caught my attention one afternoon and had me happily attentive for the duration. At a rough estimate, we see only six locations (and only seven major characters), meticulously detailed, and are reminded how modern film has come to rely more and more upon the frivolous car-chase, the flashy explosion, the comic-book stereotype. In a sense, this film follows the best traditions of an English farce, with steady entertaining build-up until the final collapse of tension.
The above comments have noted that the men are homophobic, sexist; they are correct. This film is set at the end of the 1950s - to have it any other way (to satisfy our own, strongly held, tastes) would be a gross insult to the excellent characterisation. Perhaps these viewers should be content with the strong, positive gay subtext running throughout the film - and as to sexism, we could hardly expect that Colonel Hyde would select his unit from those with happy, stable families.
Certainly enjoyable.
Cube (1997)
Hilarious if you like numbers
This film was one of the best laughs I have had in a while, watching a film, and I watched the Princess Bride directly afterwards. For anyone who knows their low primes (up to 31), and can multiply, will find some of the mathematical assertions ridiculous - for example, that no-one alive could factorise a 3-digit number in their head (quite an easy simple task). The set is pretty, the actors (and dialogue) aren't that important, and you really get to cheer when a character you've taken a dislike to bites the dust. Slightly gory, though - watch with friends rather than family. I'd also recommend the third sequel - Cube Zero, although Cube Zero is significantly more graphic.
The Ladykillers (2004)
A humdrum festival of stereotypes attempt to disguise the lack of progression
Immediately, I should say I have never watched the original film: I am not comparing this effort to the original. That said, I was not satisfied after watching. The simple plot burbles along and peters out, leaving only a weak Deus Ex Machina to end the film properly. That said, the characters in this film are interesting and fairly enjoyable, if clichéd, and no tension, however slight, is allowed to build for longer than 30 seconds before simply being resolved. This film is essentially an exercise in luck, with random chance affecting what will happen at each juncture, with no feeling of any eventual aim in mind. I suggest that this film be renamed 'The Killjoys'. (with an appropriate renaming of the main character, of course)
Legally Blonde (2001)
To say this film is terrible would be a grave understatement
The genial sap is a well-beloved main character in comedy, but is also one of the most difficult to use properly. Attention to detail must be exasperating and obsessive, and the hand of humour must be applied lightly to avoid slapstick.
Consider P.G. Wodehouse. His character of Bertram Wooster (portrayed on screen very well by Hugh Laurie) is the archetype of this sap. 'Elle Woods' is a poor, irritating copy. Instead of grand, rolling story lines which we have come to expect from this genre, with the sap being revealed as something of a genius, or a very lucky person indeed (saved, as always, by the twist at the end), we are treated to what could be mistaken for a plagiarism of 'Cold Comfort Farm', in that no cohesion is even attempted, save for the single recurring main character. If you want humour, suspense and good natured fun in small bites, watch MacGyver. Please, don't ever watch this sob-fest of self-indulgence, with pathetic forays into exploration of serious themes such as sexism. This film may well be 'Legally Blonde', but I feel it should really be Legally Burned.
The Bourne Identity (2002)
An all round terrible film
I truly believe that this is the worst mid- to high-budget film I've ever seen. I don't want to insult the author of the books, for the sequel was quite enjoyable, but this film was indescribably bad - in fact, I feel that in all future DVD releases of the trilogy it should be ruthlessly cut down into a 10 minute introduction to the second installation.
Where to start? The plot. There is no plot. Other than the tired old premise of someone important losing their memory and turning against their former companions, which isn't really properly explored. The ending leaves much to be desired, such as an ending other than one you might write at 3 AM to meet a deadline.
Since the film was produced for an American audience, it would be unfair and stupid to complain that all of the French people were speaking English. I'm willing to accept that we're watching a magic translation of some kind, but not when they dip in and out of French, making it clear that they are supposed to be speaking largely English. Why were all the American agents large Englishmen with Yorkshire accents? Why were all the assassins incompetent, firing 6 shots when 1 would have been enough to kill the target? This film had no moral message. The main character, it is painfully obvious from the start, is a trained killer. His enemies are trained killers. The romance felt like it had been written by Edward Bellamy. Nothing was satisfactorily resolved (in fact, in the second film there are several references to scenes I assume were edited out of the first).
The Bourne Identity? More like the Burned Indelibly. Onto my brain. Because it was so bad.
Santa with Muscles (1996)
A pleasant Christmas film
Encouraged by the scathing reviews of this film, a friend of mine bought the DVD of this film, having it posted from Australia. Having subsequently borrowed and watched it, I must say that it is not worth buying, but it is very well suited for Christmas broadcast. The plot is thin and predictable but also cheerful and uplifting, although there are several strange twists at the finish, and the plot holes are just explained away by... well, what we assume is magic or psychic ability. The jokes are terrible, but the acting is of acceptable quality, especially the two central characters, Blake and Elizabeth.
No, it's not a film you should show people if you want to keep them as friends. No, it's not worth ever watching again. But for what it is, a cheap and cheesy child-suitable action flick, it works well. Overall, I rate this film a 6.