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1/10
Israeli cinema at its sentimental worst
1 February 2009
Warning: Spoilers
I had extremely low expectations for this film, but even I failed to predict how nauseously sentimental, foolishly unrealistic, and poorly written it would be. All of the Israelis posting glowing reviews about this movie should be ashamed of themselves for praising such a low-quality product. I think according to those Israeli viewers, just because a movie is produced in Israel, it must be good. I'm originally from Israel but I will never hesitate to harshly criticize Israel's disgraceful cinematic efforts.

This movie must be classified as a total failure for several reasons. First, it is unabashedly sentimental and clichéd. You have already seen this type of movie many times before. A group of characters from a foreign country visit another country and guess what happens? They are transformed by their visit, and similarly transform those with whom they interact during their visit. This is the type of story that is dreamed up by a 12 year old or a C-grade screenwriter but actually has very little to do with real life.

Second, the characters are mere clichés and stock types and are not real at all. I didn't believe that a single character shown had anything in common with an actual human being. There is of course a rigidly serious Egyptian orchestra leader who develops an unfulfilled romance with a promiscuous, so-called "free spirited" Israeli restaurant owner. Then there is a socially awkward young Israeli boy who is of course tutored in the ways of girls by a fun-loving Egyptian youth. All of these sequences and scenes were so utterly detached from reality that I actually had to laugh. Essentially this movie does not contain even a trace of realism.

Finally, the writing is absolutely horrible. I frequently cringed when the scriptwriter invoked singing sequences in which characters sang songs out of nowhere in front of total strangers. Does anyone do that in real life? Of course no one does. The dialogue between the characters is completely artificial and not once did it seem remotely realistic.

I would give this movie a 0 out of 10 stars. Israel's filmmakers have shown once again that they are incapable of making a deep, insightful, or realistic film. There are only two excellent Israeli films that I know of: Late Marriage and The Syrian Bride. The Band's Visit, like so many other Israeli movies, is a disgraceful, sentimental production totally devoid of meaning.
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1/10
Journey to nowhere
3 August 2008
Prospective viewers, beware that this movie is completely devoid of substance and will provide you with a story that is neither intelligent nor coherent, neither insightful nor memorable. The story, which I found interesting for approximately the first 5-10 minutes or so, quickly devolves into foolishness and stupidity and, ultimately, leads nowhere. At one point, a soothsayer actually becomes, or seems to become, a central component of the plot. If that doesn't demonstrate to you how silly this movie is and how little it deserves your attention, I guess nothing will stop you from watching it.

Let's assume that you do choose to view it. Just remember that as you watch it and increasingly ask yourself the questions "where is this plot going?" and "is all this going to come together at the end?", you are in for some nasty surprises. My friends, you are embarking on a long journey to nowhere. Can't say you weren't warned. Remember though: it's never too late to press the "stop" button on your remote!
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Lonesome Jim (2005)
1/10
not depressing at all....just plain awful
16 February 2008
I am sitting here writing this review and the movie's not even over yet. In fact, I just checked, and there are 45 more minutes to go. But no matter, there's no need to see it through to the end. I'll just write this review and laugh as the film plays in the background and stumbles onward to some kind of presumably horrible conclusion which I don't care to ever see or know.

What accounts for my hostility to this movie? The characters are not believable. The plot is not believable. The pretentiousness of the movie is sickening. Basically, every element of the movie rings false. Buscemi obviously thought he had something to add to the dozens of movies which have already explored the well-worn themes of dysfunctional families and the apparent meaninglessness of life. However, Buscemi was badly mistaken, because this movie contains nothing new. It tries very hard to be depressing, but fortunately no one can really be depressed by it, because it's obvious that no people like this exist in the entire world.

What IS depressing however is the knowledge that somehow this film was voted several undeserved awards. Disgusting!!!! Bottom line: stay away from this worthless film at all costs.
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Life Is Life (2003)
1/10
shockingly awful
25 September 2006
I saw this movie at the Chicago International Film Festival in 2004 and was stunned by its terrible script, acting, story, and direction. I'm really not sure how this film could have ever received a 7/10 overall rating, probably the director and actors all voted themselves 10s. If I had been able to, I most likely would've ranked this movie a zero or maybe even in the negative numbers. It's a shame that Israel's film industry produces such disasters as this movie, but the good news is that there is at least one Israeli movie which is truly worthy of a 10/10 score, which is Dover Koshashvili's "Late Marriage." Anyone interested in Israeli cinema should definitely check that movie out. But...if any of your friends ever wants to watch "Life is Life"...run away as fast as you can, I promise you'll thank me!
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