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GardenAndGully
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Fight to Survive (2023)
Horribly produced
This is a horrible game. Set up for violence and burial conflict. People seeing this makes the world a worse place. The conflicts aren't even interesting its just lazy people resorting to violence to get what the think they need. Through episode 2 I don't see any redeeming qualities with the contestants given the parameters of the challenge. There are huge gaps in footage and reasoning for the actions taken by contestants as well as production. Stealing resources is allowed, and officially fighting for resources is also allowed. There is only negativity in this show. I do like the host, but I feel sorry for him that he got roped up in this community destroyer.
Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets (2017)
Barely watchable fantasy/SciFi
The movie starts with a montage of the international space station as it continues to welcome on-board new nations of earth and, over hundreds of years, alien beings from galaxies far way. The station gets larger and larger and its reach grows farther and farther.
Somewhere out there, there is an alien utopian planet of peace-loving beings, but of course someone wants to destroy it.
Luckily there are two heroes, partners, unlikely love interests, justice fighters to get involved and attempt to save the universe.
The sets are cartoonish, the plot is cliché, the actors are unnecessary as most of the interesting characters are CGI anyway. They try to pass the leading man as a Hollywood hunk, but he is far from that. The leading female is always the most beautiful, smartest, and quickest in the room. The white, male humans in suits are greedy and ruthless.
There is lots to dislike about this movie but as a whole it at least holds my attention to watch it to the end. Even though every part of this movie was stollen from Avatar, The 5th Element, They Live, and Starship Troopers.
The Machine (2023)
Unexpected fun!
I was a big fan of Burp Kreischer's comedy and had heard the legendary "The Machine" bit many times. Over the years, I grew a little board of his shtick that made me laugh so much the first dozen or so times I experienced it. Off comes the shirt, story telling of drunk escapades, and laughing at himself till he drooled. It was all hilarious for a while, but 10 years of this?? Come on! I didn't even want to watch the movie because I couldn't see how he could make me see any of it through new eyes and be interesting or funny yet again.
Well he did it. Of course he rehashes the story that made me fall in love with him in the first place, but it is from a new perspective and adding a bunch of more embarrassingly sad and pathetic aspects of it and how it has affected his whole life, and relationships with his friends and family.
He is able to tell the story once again with a sense of urgency and a semi believable plot that requires him to remember it as it REALLY happened.
The first act is great. He shows how, even though he hasn't outgrown his stupidity, he is trying to be a better father, husband and human. Then the second act starts and you buckle in for a wild ride. The movie loses me a couple of times with some outlandish and ridiculous plot points and slow downs, but comes back strong during the transition to the third act.
Here it again gets gets outlandish and with downright fantasy John Wick style action, but with cliche dodging bullets and having conversations while all hell breaks loose.
But it all works. I was interested, engaged, and laughed out loud quite a few times. A hilarious easter egg hits you right in the face with some graffiti in the seedy underworld of Russia.
The story, comedy, acting, and cinematography is actually top notch. Stick around for a credits scene.
Outlast (2023)
Absolutely the worst behavior
Absolutely the worst behavior I have ever seen in a reality show. This show should have been stopped half way through and 3 people should have been sent home and blackballed by the producers.
I think the show has some great possibilities and concepts and I was eager to watch it. There were some skirmishes and clashes in group dynamics and that should be expected. What I didn't expect was the down right criminal actions taken by one team to destroy and possibly kill their competitors. They turned a skills competition into a forfeit or die situation. Their actions were despicable and ruined this show.
Luther: The Fallen Sun (2023)
I hated this movie in the first 10 minutes and...
I turned it off in the first 23 minutes. So many completely idiotic plot points I could not entertain watching one minute more. The acting was fine, the cinematography was fine, but the dialog driving the plot was so dumb, I could not stand to watch any more of this asinine movie. The antagonist is revealed very early. He has a stupid hair cut. No cops on the scene ask the important questions. The assumptions are dead on with no proof. The protagonist makes a cliché foreshadowing promise that tells you what will happen in the whole rest of the movie. The new cop on the case ignores glaring evidence in the case just to prove some kind of respectable police code. And the still image that is used to portray the film on Netflix gives away yet another key factor that I never let the movie show me because it was so glaringly obvious.
Elvis (2022)
A Colonel heavy montage of Elvis' career
I didn't like this movie. It felt like the whole first half was just a bunch of montages strung together. And many of the directorial and editing choices were strange, like the establishing shots of Las Vegas and Graceland were repetitive and over long. Unfortunately, all the songs were truncated, modernized, and sampled. I truly disliked what they did to even the most beloved of Elvis' songs. And the non-Elvis songs sounded so out of place. Much of the dialog was said with the actor's lips obscured or with their back turned which made it feel over dubbed. The acting was fine, but I disliked the sound and direction. And the ending? What the heck? The dramatization just stops and turns into a documentary. Overall, I expected so much more from this film.
Windfall (2022)
Modern noir
From the opening credits, it has the sound of a classic film noir. Its suspenseful music prepared me for a slow unfolding plot line of human frailty and the result bad decisions. The whole movie is wonderfully composed and beautifully simple. It has a single location, a beautiful orchard estate populated with orange trees and a luxurious villa,. And a minuscule cast. This ominously paints a scene of usual tranquility and peacefulness in the midst of isolation, trust, and doubt. Like the location each of the characters slowly reveal their vulnerability, strengths, and loneliness felt even under the constant scrutiny of the world.
Dunkirk (2017)
Immersive WW2 experience
A British perspective of World War 2 during the battle of Dunkirk. Every soldier's story told through the lives and deaths of a few brave, desperate, and inspired men.. It is beautifully shot but brutal to watch. Though 3 major plotlines are brilliantly told simultaneously, the movie feels like a montage of 101 ways to die.
The Lost Daughter (2021)
The Lost...
I had a very hard time understanding what this movie was about for quite a while. But, a little after mid way, it all stared making sense to me. A woman goes on a solo beach vacation and uses the time to observe the families around her and reflect on her own life decisions she has made. She vacations in Greece at an extended stay villa. Close quarters, a single beach, and common haunts in a small costal town create constant reluctant interaction with her neighbors. The film is full of tension and anxiety and made me feel uneasy the whole time. The acting from the lead and a few other recognizable actors is superb and once I was on board, I was able to appreciate the directing.
Pig (2021)
Nick Cage is great
This movie has a storyline that is easy to mock. Take it seriously and you find that nothing can take the place of the ones you hold most dear. When there's no place to run, you better hope you love the place you are. Be true to yourself. Don't let those around you force your hand. This story doesn't go the way you think it should, and that is OK. Love the place you are.
Sweet Girl (2021)
Nothing makes sense
It is unclear how any of this made it past the pitch stage. The plot makes no sense, the dialog is ridiculous, and the reveals are just plain stupid. There is this notion that you can do anything you set your mind to and that sheer will and determination in the fight for justice results in success. But, no. This is a dangerous rhetoric. Example: 100 pound teenagers should not take on trained fighters.
The Serpent (2021)
About 3 episodes too long.
Like a serpent, this series winds through past and present. Often cutting out key details that you are yearning for. Going back in time, then forward, back, and back again making it very confusing to follow. The main characters are emotionless, monotone, and escape or fail in the same ways each time. It drags on and on, going in the same circles of enablers, victims, investigators, and incompetent police. I was board with the series by episode 4 when it was evident that nothing was going to happen. I suggest watching to episode 4 and skipping ahead to episode 8. Still predictable and boring but at least it won't be as excruciating.
The Con Is On (2018)
This comedy left me disapointed
A ridiculous amount of drinking, sneaking in plain sight, atrocious dialog, and an unrelatable plot. This film is not enjoyable in any way.
The 2nd (2020)
How does something this bad get made?
Nothing makes sense, including the title of the film and Ryan Phillipe being some kind of special forces bad ass. All the worst clichés are here. The "give your life for the cause, multi national henchmen", the "jump from the roof onto a moving van", the "dumb story about a watch", and the "dramatic monologue from the bad guys instead of just doing murdering they were hired to do". What was the point of the botched kidnapping? How is there ice in the bucket at the home bar as soon as you get home? Why turn your back after just hitting a guy? The editing, dialogue, the directing, the acting is among the worst I have ever seen. I like a good "bad movie", but this is well beyond any sliver of redeeming factors. Horrible, horrible, horrible.
Kevin Hart: Zero F**ks Given (2020)
Where are the jokes?
A self aggrandizing collection of anecdotes from his life where he wasn't given the respect he believes he deserves. He kept referring to how what he just said was a joke, but these were long boring stories about how rich he is and how he should be more respected and how lucky we are to hear him speak. His exit video, is especially awkward. I think he was trying to be self deprecating, but just managed to give himself backhanded compliments. Horrible and un funny. I did like the room he performed in and the intimate nature of the special.
Knock Knock (2015)
A pointless home invasion movie.
If you like Keanu Reeves, don't watch this film. He is forced to act and does a sub par job. The things that endear him to me are his humor, his sense of cool, and his athleticism. Neither of which are showcased here. The second worst thing about this film is everything else. There is no understandable motivation for this senseless attack of a successful family man. Needless violence and uncalled for mischief is the only plot line. It might as well be a vignette in The Purge. There is no backstory or satisfying ending.
Away (2020)
A family and relationship dram in space.
This is a TV series. The first season is 10 episodes.
An international team attempt a three year journey to Mars and back. The series explores the drama of family and relationships between members of the space crew, and their colleagues and family members back on Earth. I enjoyed both the character arcs and the science regardless of how true to life it is. The characters represent a wide spectrum of human experience and follow common stereotypes.
Da 5 Bloods (2020)
Love the story potential, but artistic choices made this a hard watch
I really like the story and think it could have huge potential as a great film, but Lee's artistry falls flat here.
The main plot centers around four Vietnam war vets who travel back to Vietnam 40 years later to recover the remains of their squad leader, Norm, who was killed in battle.
The movie takes a long time to get going and when it does, there are way too many unnecessary plot points. The strangest thing thing and very distracting for me were the flashbacks and how they used the same actors with no attempt to make them look any younger. Also, one of the more gory scenes looked straight out of a Troma film.
I have been a big fan of Spike Lee and enjoy many of his movies, but this one is more than disappointing.
Messiah (2020)
Interesting and suspenseful
I am enjoying watching this series which is part political, part religious, and part investigative.