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Rise of the Gargoyles (2008 TV Movie)
4/10
not very elaborated... but entertains
5 December 2009
Warning: Spoilers
workers involuntarily release a gargoyle that proceeds to behead those who took her eggs (and some who didn't!).

the animation effects are not bad, as neither is the actor's performance, so all in all it's a solid and watchable film.

there are some absurd situations but the winner is the scene where the policeman is taken by the gargoyle while a criminologist team is processing another victim... though another policeman 2 feet away from them is being showered by blood while calling out for the agent into the air, they keep on with their work, undisturbed and without as much as looking to see what is going on! that's what i call being "in focus" with work!!!
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1/10
not a good film
29 November 2009
i honestly expected something a little less amateur and experimental as this film seems to be... it even had the bonus of adding some of the original film's actors, but it simply went wrong.

poor dialogues, poor acting and very very poor makeup... the first 10 minutes can't mistake you, it's going to be that bad! there's no likable characters, Allan (the main character (???))can't even gather sympathy nor pity, he's simply loathsome and all the other characters... well, envy and hate can't justify their behaviour and we're left with no explanation for their actions.

watch it for yourselves, if you can...
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Day of the Dead (2008 Video)
6/10
why is this a zombie film?
17 February 2008
Warning: Spoilers
i'll start by saying that the film isn't all that bad, considering it not to be related with the Romero films except in title and some of the character's names, of course, as so many have said.

to start with, the "creatures" depicted are alive before "turning", therefore they cannot be zombies, they are more victims of some sort of virus, much like in Resident Evil, than anything else.

it's also odd that a virus that destroys the neural synapses can enhance physical capacities, but that's what fiction is all about, i suppose.

other than that, there are a few interesting scenes, the same usual clichés and, of course, predictable ones.

all in all, there are worse films than this, only i feel it's not fair to have it associated with the Romero saga, since it differs so much from them (much like this last remake of Dawn of the Dead did, with those speed zombies).
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Epic Movie (2007)
2/10
a comedy? where?
13 April 2007
this is one of the worse pseudo comedies i've seen...

one expects a lot of non sense in such a film, but expects it also to be funny...

"Epic Movie" completely fails that and manages to be very uninteresting to watch. not only are the "comedy" sketches poor, the dialogues are no better either and the persistent music (i'm not a fan of this sort of music, to be honest!) scenes only contribute to make watching this film an epic work... of miserable endurance.

even if you're a fan of this sort of films, restrain from watching, as laughter is not guaranteed.
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7/10
entertaining
13 April 2007
it's not a "hard zombie" film, but yet it manages to have a few "clever" scenes while mixing along some humour (not always necessary, one must admit it), which makes this film enjoyable and pleasant to watch.

the acting is fairly decent and well accomplished and the storyline, though not brilliant and all that elaborated. it still manages to keep the film from being yet another pretentious zombie production, producing good moments of solid action with a couple of more "heavy/scary" scenes, though i wouldn't quite call it a horror film.

a good option to consider ;)
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Ring Around the Rosie (2006 Video)
2/10
boring and predictable
12 April 2007
these should be the words that best describe this film, although silliness and non sense have quite a strong presence here.

it's pointless to even attempt to describe the film's plot - there isn't a coherent one! the acting isn't all that bad, but one gets easily fed up with the never ending scenes that depict nothing at all and are simply confusing.

the scenes (painfully!) march slowly along towards an end that brings nothing new and unexpected to the genre. there are better films who manage to accomplish the effect this one tries (and fails!) to achieve, so i'd say there should be no reason for people to watch this film, unless they wish to decide for themselves just how poor can a film be.
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2/10
it could have been worse... but not much!
2 April 2007
Warning: Spoilers
...so i'm simply rating it 2.

the storyline is quite old and beaten up, yet one has to remember this is a remake.

the mutant characters have enhanced human capacities: - they can steal a red coat from the van and yet, by foot, cover the distance from the gas pump to the accident site (much faster than it took Big Bob to get there!); - they can foresee that there are new victims though the gas man could not warn them (either that or they spend the whole day looking at the road, since there was no phone to communicate); - they are bullet proof and explosion proof (though Lynn has quite a display of vulnerability there, taking a close range shot in the head and still managing to raise her torso to add to scare (?) the viewer); - and all that while they were clever enough to never have been seen by anyone, in spite of the decent collection of cars (no one is ever bright enough in these films to cover a large area of ground using small planes or helicopters in order to find missing persons who we know to be many, given the amount of news clipped on the wall in the gas station).

the non mutant characters run only no half their "brains": - a retired policeman who nearly empties his gun at the darkness (clever, clever!); - a boy who shoots over his shoulder as he runs away from a mutant (though we are lead to believe he had used a gun before); - the "hero" who manages to run away when he clearly has the advantage to take down one of the mutants and locks himself in a division in a strange house inhabited by several other mutants(i'm certain we'd all do the same, it would increase largely our chances of escaping, of course!).

so we are presented with mutants whose seemingly only downside is the way they look, and "normal" people who we are invited to feel little sympathy for (other than the dogs and the baby, who are we left to like in the film?), does this make a sound plot for anyone?

there are quite a few other non sense aspects, along with the cannibal touch that doesn't fit quite well here, as we see fresh bodies stockpiled and being dragged, indicating they feast on human flesh and blood but not on their own (are we truly expected to believe hundreds of people drive through that road, providing nourishment for more than 6 mutants?).

the rape scene suggests they did that sort of thing all the time as well (wouldn't it have been more fun if they had kidnapped Brenda, like they did to the bodies?), and it was quite a plan they had there to fool their victims by incinerating Big Bob, who also contributes to the rape by giving us a display of superhuman powers as he manages to remain conscious throughout most of the burning (along with the ropes!).

as the film slowly marches to an end, the viewer is prepared to accept all (nothing new, anyway!) - Doug's display of Superman, Ruby's kind gesture of humanity and, of course, the final scene that gives room for a sequel!

the rape+burn+gun-point-at-baby scene is clearly overvalued, the intention is clearly to shock the viewer and make people curious to see the film (after so much brutality on TV and similar films, can we really feel disgusted at watching that scene?) and, from what i've read in some of the reviews here, it clearly succeeds, but all the rest fails - there is no horror, no thrill, no suspense, no logic thread... very little to make this film live up to the rating it presently holds (6.5).

it's a good thing there are plenty of people who get thrilled and shocked at these sort of films, it makes me feel a whole lot better to know i disliked it!
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Evil's City (2005 Video)
1/10
evil film or plain bad one?
29 June 2006
not only does this film manages to have no plot, it also has some of the most awful dialogs i've seen.

certainly, the story may offer some potential, but i can't help the idea that someone threw a few clichés into a pot and tried to obtain a film (?) out of it.

from the start one can tell it's going to be a very amateur film, but as the film develops, we realize even the production is amateur - the scenes that should be happening at approximately the same time are filmed in what seems different time spaces (i can't tell how many days have passed, as time passed differently for the different characters) and the effects can't even be called "special"...

i'd like to say that the actors tried to save this production, but it never happened, they just got lost within the absence of plot.

save your time and watch something else instead.
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