kuito69 Reviews

The Happening (2008)

Yet Another Hollywood Mogul Preaching About The Environment...

[1/10 · 14 June 2008]

Run like the wind? Nope, this movie preaches, "Let's run FROM the wind."

When I saw this movie opening night, I have never heard an entire audience boo as loudly as I did when that movie was over. If I wanted to listen to someone preach to me about the environment, I'd watch the news.

Audiences expect to be entertained when going to movies, not be lectured on life. Yeah, we get it... people pollute, etc etc etc.... Heard it all before.

I am fully aware that movies provide entertainment at a reasonable price for a movie ticket, but FAR too many people are capitalizing on the whole, "oh let's save the environment" speech in order to make a more respectable name for their-selves, especially after releasing either a movie or music album that flopped big time with critics and audiences alike.

The story dragged on and on, and when you were just about to fall to sleep, they'd throw something gory at you to wake you back up. It was also very disappointing to be given the reason why things were going wrong right away. Usually he waits till the end when you're at the edge of your seat wondering what clever twist he'll throw at you, but not this movie.

Instead of preaching to people about the environment, why not use your money for something worth while that will actually benefit the environment instead of wasting millions of dollars on an awful movie.

If you're an environment nut, then put your money to something worth while. Donate some money to a charity instead of seeing this waste of time.

Saw III (2006)

Extremely disappointing to say the least

[4/10 · 27 October 2006]

Okay, if you're a Saw fan, you will be VERY disappointed with this one. It was nice to see all the missing pieces (pardon the pun) from all of Jigsaw's schemes, but the whole Amanda thing really bothered me. I found that the Saw makers really screwed up with bringing Amanda into the story. I LOVED when Donnie (Eric Matthews) commented on how she is NOTHING, which I completely agree with. She is just some whiny little girl who Jigsaw should have finished off. He gave her a chance, he tested her again (huge spoiler!!!) and I just find her character to be weak. I am not sure if it was the character or the actress, but I found it to be a really bad part of the story. Okay, it was a mind boggler to find out in part 2 that she was his accomplice. I found it ironic that she was cutting herself and doing drugs, Jigsaw chose her, she got out of the trap, gets a second chance, and screws it up big time by cutting herself and NOT listening to her mentor. Way to screw up big time Amanda. I found the end was really weak and predictable with no second guesses. People were actually booing it in the theater, myself included. If you can piece together how Jigsaw performed/set up all of his traps from the first 2 movie, that's all that Saw 3 pieces together, and also seems like it has cheap clips from E.R. hahaha! If you want to see how it ends, go ahead, but wait until it comes out on video. I hate to betray the franchise, I am a huge fan of 1 and 2, but I am just really let down by this movie. Sorry to those who are fans. Oh, one more thing: some of the flashbacks take place maybe 2 minutes after something just happened, which seems retarded.

School for Scoundrels (2006)

Broke @$$ "Anger Management" Written All Over It

[4/10 · 30 September 2006]

I, for some reason wasted money to watch this movie under the impression from several people that this was actually a decent movie. However, I found myself extremely bored in the movie, especially with the cliché character of Jon Heder that is really getting stale. The only decent thing about this movie were Billy Bob Thorton and Michael Clarke Duncan's maniacal characters. Ben Stiller had a funny role as well, which should have been focused on a bit more. The outline is almost identical to Anger Management except this movie deals with a loser as opposed to a guy who is "angry." An "odd" therapist comes into play, screws the main character over, they fight over the girl, the main character wins, the end. If you've seen Anger Management (which was sadly better than this movie), you have no reason to watch this unless extreme boredom sets in.

Saw II (2005)

Summarized in one word... BRILLIANT!

[10/10 · 28 October 2005]

I never thought the makers would be able to top their amazing plot and story of the first Saw movie, but I was wrong. This movie was psychologically brilliant. The entire movie I found myself trying to think like John (Jigsaw). When the end came along (I won't ruin it, you have to see it for yourself, it's just that damn good!), I wasn't even close. Every aspect of shear brilliance was covered, with, of course, another amazing twist at the end. Best movie I've seen in a while. I hope the makers will keep it at this. It'll be very hard to get three in a row, but if they do, it will successfully be my favourite trilogy. If you haven't seen this yet, its the perfect date movie! Enjoy it to its fullest and embrace the magic of Saw. I know, its about killing and whatnot, but look beyond that and see the brilliance of the entire thing.

Sin City (2005)

Very in-your-face action!!

[10/10 · 11 April 2005]

By far, this is probably one of the best movies I have seen since "Gladiator" because even the smallest aspect of this movie is incredible. The characters really pull you in and make you truly involved with the movie. When I watched this movie a week and a day after it came out, I regret not seeing it on opening night! This movie is absolutely incredible. I am a huge fan of the film-noir style films and the darker sides of life and all of the characters electrified the movie, even the smallest roles (ie: Elijah Wood's "Kevin" character. I still have nightmares about that guy!). I find myself talking to my friends who have seen this movie and say, "Which story was your favorite?!" and most say that it is either Marv or Hartigan's story. Personally, I find Hartigan's story more personal and in-depth. It was sad how after saving Nancy, he had to spend 8 years in jail and ruin his reputation in order to protect her. I was happy to see that they reunited and defeated Yellow Bastard (who was absolutely DISTURBING! Bravo Nick Stahl!). I love Bruce's soliloquy's (spelling?) and how he would always encourage himself to fight on despite his age and heart condition. Definite courage to be admired. If such a thing were possible, every character should deserve an Oscar for that movie! I suggest that everyone sees this movie as soon as possible! After reading this, get some buddies together and hit this movie up! I guarantee you will not be disappointed! :)

Saw (2004)

Absolutely demonic!!!

[10/10 · 1 March 2005]

For those who have not seen this movie in theaters, I feel so sorry for you! The intensity of it with the killer sound really plucks your nerves in the worst way. If you have surround sound or know someone who does, I suggest watching it with surround sound if you want to feel the true experience of this movie. "Jigsaw" teaches cruel but in a sicker sense valuable life lessons to horrible people. One girl in the movie is actually grateful for having encountered Jigsaw so she can now start over fresh and appreciate what she truly has. All of the characters in this movie add to the intensity in their own way. Danny Glover adds an eventual insanity and urge to catch Jigsaw at the expense of his life due to his partner's death. As for Jigsaw, I feel he does a very good job of portraying an "evil character." I love how he uses the tiny manican (spelling?) to represent himself. God that thing is creepy! I won't ruin the ending of this movie, because if I do, it will definitely ruin everything that builds up to it. This ending makes the movie spectacular. Probably one of the best endings in this type of movie since Se7en came along.

Shaun of the Dead (2004)

Quality romzom movie! Fine holiday fun!

[10/10 · 26 February 2005]

This movie is really a great movie! Awesome characters for sure! Shaun is the coolest, he's hilarious! I love his step-dad too. He kind of has a Vincent Price feeling to him. Very creepy and you only think the worst of him for a while! Then there's Shaun's lovable side-kick! He is great comic relief from a tense situation. Always makes you laugh in the tightest of situations. I find it amusing how no one even has the SLIGHTEST clue that anything is happening yet people all around them are slowly developing into zombies. Now if anyone is a great fan of the Evil Dead series, they will no doubt love this movie. Funny how the answer to all their problems consists of either going for a nice cup of tea, or a pint at the Winchester! Good stuff. The ending is absolutely great. It is much like Dawn of the Dead remake where it just involves someone waking up into the absolute horror, except its hilarious. I suggest everyone sees this. Even if you aren't a horror movie fan, or zombie movie, it is still a great comedy movie. I would love to see a sequel to this movie. Anyone agree? Or should they just leave this as the classic that it is??

28 Days Later (2002)

Great movie, 2 thumbs up!

[10/10 · 16 February 2005]

I think this is a very good movie. Sure, its hard to get used to trying to hear the language clearly (I have a hard time making clear words from British accents!) but once you get into the movie, its awesome! Starts off a bit slow, little bit of Cillian Murphy penis which kinda makes me think, "hmm.. where is this movie going?" but once he reaches the church, its a non-stop thrill ride! Just constant thrills! its not like Resident Evil although lots of people say it is. The "infected" are just out of control. They are fast and they attack with extreme efficiency. I really wish there would be a sequel to this movie. It would be interesting to see. Or maybe even a prequel. In the movie, it discusses what happens while Jim (Cillian) was unconscious for 28 days. They should make a part 2 about what happened in those days. Or even the days after all the infected start to slowly die off. Would be interesting to see another outbreak somewhere. It can't just end there!! It had better not be like the Terminator series where it takes 10 years to make another part! Who agrees with me!?

Fight Club (1999)

All-around kick ass movie!

[10/10 · 10 February 2005]

This movie is absolutely incredible! If you haven't seen it yet, I seriously recommend you watch it. Shows society at its finest. Truly shows that you don't truly know a person until you fight them. In this case, Edward Norton had to kick his own ass to truly realise his destiny. His destiny was to be Tyler Durden. I love this movie so much! Absolutely hilarious! So blunt, so great! So many people who have seen this movie want to start a Fight Club! It is just that empowering with all the respect that comes with it. The ending of this movie is just messed up. Damn, EVERYTHING about this movie is messed up! Sex, violence, the works! It really shows that life isn't always as it appears.

Hide and Seek (2005)

Mediocre at best

[1/10 · 29 January 2005]

I went to the opening night of this movie... and I must say, I am very disappointed. The trailers really made the movie look amazing, but when I saw the movie, I thought, "When is something actually going to happen?" I found it disappointing that it took a long time for something to happen, and when it finally did, it was a very weak way to finish off a movie. As someone stated in another comment, the only thing worth seeing in that movie is Dakota Fanning. For an 11 year old, she is very creepy and sure knows how to keep an audience at the edge of their seats. I suggest to anyone who wants to see that movie to consider seeing another one, or wait until it comes out on VHS/DVD so you can rent it for cheap.