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Evil Dead Rise (2023)
Terrible acting made for social media crowd.
If you live on thicktok then you'll probably like this. For anyone else who loves the early films, you're going to cringe at these characters, their mannerisms, their speech patterns and their smug delivery. I seriously didn't find any of these people likable. Movies that start out fast are a giant red flag. It usually means that they're designed for people who have a hard time focusing and paying attention. It's as if you're watching a bunch of self absorbed, snarky kids that are trying too hard to be "modern" and fake quirky. Who wrote this garbage? Absolutely terrible. Turned it off within the first half hour.
Jakob's Wife (2021)
Laughable.
Movie started out ok with a couple of good jump scares. Good cinematography and score so I was excited to see what would develop. Then enter the fake stuffed rats glued to an actor. Then the worst vampire acting I've seen since Blackula (which had a better storyline). Acting was pretty bad especially the husband, the vampire girl, the young delinquent... Wow that's almost all of the actors!
Severed (2005)
Stopped it after 50 minutes...
This film surprisingly has many good young actors in it. The character development however is awful, and one is left feeling that you just don't "feel" for any of the characters. Decent production is wasted by poor dialogue , and unusually melodramatic lines.I don't mind watching a film that isn't firing on all cylinders, this one doesn't spark most of them. I must admit that I am a fan of Argento, Romero and Fulci and I expected more from this attempt at a zombie film.The formula isn't hard, give us decent acting, lots of tension,of course good effects and you're halfway here.I truly believe that most U.S. horror is being shot for the "MTV generation." At least I feel comfortable knowing that we still have some good editors, and sound production left.The camera work is the very frenetic and hand held stuff that we have been fed lately...please rent a Stedicam! At least.
Satan's Playground (2006)
Horrible film...insults the true adult horror fans intelligence
I am tired of wasting my time with pathetic horror. The worst acting you've ever seen, and you immediately hope all of the main characters die soon.The movie had just started when you get the "Did you hear that?" line. Oh my God...I have finally realized that there is no American horror any more. The production value is castrated by amateurish acting. American horror needs something other than "a band of crazies out in the wilderness terrorizing a family." The emphasis on the Home Depot "scary" door knocker is totally laughable. The only redeeming factor is a trailer for Evil Dead, which is a much better film.I stopped this one fast and sailed it across the room.
Blood Relic (2005)
Bloody unwatchable plot line is a Relic of the past
A complete waste of about a half an hour.IT'S A CURSED TALISMAN MOVIE...OH NOOO!The only thing this movie had going for it was a nice collection of vintage warplanes that were housed in the museum used a setting for this mess.Cardboard acting, horrible make-up (rubber Spencer Gifts Heart, and Campbells Tomato Soup blood)and the same old "lets have a séance" plot line abound in this movie.About the only thing frightening in this movie is Billy Dragos dental work!I had to turn it off after what appears to be every female hottie in this film starts disrobing,looks like the producers ran out of ideas early here.I can't understand why after watching the terrible acting in the first half hour of this movie,anyone wouldn't be rooting for the killer anyway. Skip this one.
Devil's Pond (2003)
Nice Surprise
This movie only looks like an independent on the DVD box.After the first 20 minutes the viewer is treated to great cinematography, excellent sound mixing and decent acting by Reid.Pardue's performance I can't rate very strong, but I didn't roll my eyes once, so he must have done a good job! I thought that he could have presented himself just a little bit more intensely, with some scenes ending up a little flat on his part. This movie exhibits great screenplay, editing which contribute to some really intense and frightening scenes.There are great tense chasing scenes that were very surprising in execution.Nice to see a smaller production company turning out such a decent product.Set location in the middle of a lake in Montana was spooky and breathtaking at the same time.If you like independents, get this one for a good night home at the movies!
Assault on Precinct 13 (2005)
Typical moron fodder
This is what Hollywood expects the typical demographic wants. I almost broke my DVD player trying to rip out this terrible waste of time. The acting was atrocious, the story's premise was unbelievable. Detroit was portrayed as having a neighborhood where the streets are empty, no one walks the street...OK. Then this police station which happens to have a handful of misfit cops (and always the token "about to retire soon" cop (Dennehy) is allowed to unexpectedly handle a group of inmates that includes one seriously demented cop killer? Then the phone line is cut (A major problem at police stations everywhere) and of course they jam everyones cellphone with some mystical device that has yet to be invented. Then laser beams started following everyone from the windows which were supposed to represent laser aiming devices on the bad guys guns I guess, but ended up looking like a cheap aerial searchlight show at the opening of yet another Curves for women. Lasers point straight at a subject! not all over the place like at Studio 54 in 1979! I can't even fathom Hawke getting high enough to accept this garbage script.