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3/10
Not Enough Heart
23 August 2019
Warning: Spoilers
The idea of FNAF on the big screen could totally work but it doesn't when the movie tries to convince you that these robots are so advanced that they can move like humans in some scenes and in other scenes they move like, well, robots(with added robot sounds). Going from incredibly fluid motions to a poor man's robot dance breaks the immersion of "killer robots on the loose" and it just ends up feeling like a movie about guys in suits having had enough of their job and now they want to kill people.

The gore is fine whenever it's there. Some of the kills are very silly which is fine. And some of them are very poorly executed. A certain fire scene has the quality of a Youtuber who just figured out how to use After Effects for the first time.

The acting is quite bad. A few actors are doing what they can and pulling it off but most of the cast is really bad. The adult fans of the show are overacting to the point where it hurts to hear them speak. I get it, the older brother is meant to be awkward but it's taken to the next level with lines being spoken poorly.

The camera work is what saves the movie in my opinion. If whoever was behind the camera had done a worse job the movie would've been a 1* for me but it's not terrible in that regard.

Overall, I can see why some of the people in the review section love it but it's clear they can't see past their excitement and review the movie as a movie. I loved the Mortal Kombat Annihiliation movie as a kid but we all know how terrible that one is. And I love Venom as a movie but I'm not biased enough to say it's a master piece 10/10 like people here.
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5/10
Rent, don't buy..
1 October 2009
I bought it, because I was fooled by the "destined to become a cult classic" sticker on the front.. It's nowhere near being a cult classic, I'd be surprised if it's remembered in a few years..

The characters were funny enough, most of the time, but sometimes also too much.. Like lead actor Morgan got annoying in the end with his cocky attitude, could've been done better..

Zombies farting all the time isn't my thing either.. Zombies suddenly learning to run in the middle of the movie isn't my thing either.. An ending you've seen many times before isn't my thing either..

Also a very big concern I have.. WHY do some zombie heroes and heroins try to find a cure, that can turn the zombies back to normal?? Who'd want to be a rotten human? Zombies are DEAD and CAN'T be turned back.. You can maybe make a vaccine, so you can become immune, but a cure to turn you back would never be possible in any zombie universe..

"You've been turned back to normal! Now go live your life again!" "But.. My guts are all over the floor.." *drops dead again*

Rent it, if you MUST see it!
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1/10
If you're bored, maybe.. If you're in the mood for horror, avoid this!
26 September 2009
I wanna keep this short, since you shouldn't waste your time reading this, when you could be out looking for great horror movies..

There's nothing scary in this movie.. No originality and no interesting stories..

I do not know how this movie has gotten praise, since it's boring..

"Oh but it sets the mood of Halloween so great!" That's not enough to make it a good movie.. This movie relies on tits and a little monster to keep things alive.. The little monster appears in the end of the movie, when you're already sleeping and the tits appear randomly through-out the movie..

Avoid this if you're looking for a good scare!!
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Supercroc (2007)
1/10
One of the worst movies I've spent my time on..
4 April 2007
Warning: Spoilers
This might not be a really good review, but a movie this bad shouldn't get one..

Worst and slowest start EVER.. It's so slow, you listen to a military girl and man, who obviously SHOULDN'T have been in the military.. They are talking under a mission, where they clearly should shut up.. This goes on for 6-7 minutes and you're almost sleeping, right up until the crappy special effects kicks in and the sergeant freezes up and screams the name of the first dead guy, instead of shooting the damn croc.. I'm talking about really crappy effects, the discovery channel When Dinosaurs Walked, they were better made than this.. It's really bad.. And blurring out the croc, when it's in the frame doesn't make it more believable.. You don't get any storyline in it.. You start off with those soldiers and that's it.. And the Serge. who's supposed to be the toughest of all, gets in contact with the croc, he doesn't even shoot.. He sees it, falls back, CUT scene, let the audience think of some gruesome death in their heads.. The amount of shots fired in this movie is also incredible.. They could kill every animal in the world with that many shots.. The smalltalk and problems between soldiers are also low-standard.. You never feel for any of the characters, at all, when someone's about to die it's not like "no, she's shouldn't die!" it's more like "noo, don't show me more of the croc!" You don't even see the croc die.. :'(

I even suspect the movie of using some game voices.. Death cries and screams..

Don't even rent this movie..
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