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alyson-english
Reviews
The Essex Serpent (2022)
kept leading into something spectacular...then fizzled out every tine
There was so much possibility here! The look is opulent, the relationships thick with possibility, the characters hinting at depths beyond role playing, and then...nothing. So many tantalizing snippets of so much more - her scars, Luke's goals, Martha's past and future, even Frankie's depths - and we are never invited to explore any of it. I kept asking myself what this was about, in the end, and there's simply not much to say. Watch to wrap yourself in high brown Victorian dysfunction that never quite gives you the meat of the dysfunction.
Being truly Victorian means never more than hinting at the fullness of any situation, any emotion, and that's all we get...but the emotions are still there, and that's what we want and deserve. The tiny hope of something supernatural is offered, then snatched back. The mysteries posited but never addressed again (how did a man who died peacefully end up in the middle of the march with his neck ostensibly snapped? What exactly happened to Naomi's sister? What was Naomi doing the last three episodes...and why?) are even more frustrating than the low-pressure drip of plot development.
Overall, a disappointment. So much more was right there for the taking, and its bounty sits and rots, like the stranded body of "the serpent."
Father Brown: The Wrong Shape (2013)
a treasure of an epusode
I'm rewatching these early seasons of Father Brown, and this episode stands out in its patient plot, emotional depth, and lack of cozy murder tropes. I am brought to tears again by the quietly stunning ache of the acting and writing - Ruth Gemmell has had many brilliant roles since this, but she is an absolute powerhouse. And coming off watching the later seasons more recently, having Hugo Speer as the police inspector is just amazing after so many painful seasons of Inspector Mallory's spitting cringe.
Ghost Stories (2017)
strange & surprising...in both good and bad ways
My husband thought it was "spooky" and "interesting." I thought it was fascinating...until it became clear it wasn't.
To be clear, it didn't confuse us. It's pretty straightforward, actually, which is sort of a dampener, for me, on something I'm expecting to be a supernatural thriller.
Spoilers ahead...
The first issue for me was that it was very obvious that the Cameron character was aged up. So I watched him, trying to figure out who it was going to be behind that face work. And it came to me quickly too. My husband had already spoiled himself and when I asked him, "so is that [actor's name]?" we both knew what that reveal was going to be. But we were still curious about how they got to that point.
I was fascinated. The actor being transformed, the ghostly sightings, the seeming trails of the inexplicable...I thought maybe it was going to be quantum physics, and honestly, that's scary, the idea of timelines having breaks where they overlap or bleed into another one!
But no. No.
The reveal of the actor behind the mask signaled the death spiral of a movie that, until that point, had been captivating and freaky with quality jump-scares and creepiness.
So 3/4 of the movie is quite good! It's freaky and weird and interesting, all in good ways!
The last quarter, though...like I kept an open mind. I was happy to stick with the plot - they'd earned that after the preceding story. But the oxygen just kept dropping and then the movie flatlined. Yes, the ending ties together a lot of little loose threads that it would've been quite annoying to have left loose. But it would've been better if maybe they'd had some sort of unified plan from the start to either not drop all those gumdrops along the way, or to have a way to tie them off that wasn't, fundamentally, "it was all a dream!"
I'm not saying don't watch it. I'm saying enjoy the really quality "ghost stories," but be ready for the ending to be of a totally different tone, with a totally different feel, and for it to bring in its own questions that don't get answered (when did that happen? What motivated it?).
Too many would-be horror movies seem to just decide they're done, they're bored now, so yeah...the end. No questions.
I appreciate meta horror. I really do. I don't need it all to be the same basic ideas with no twists or new, interesting takes. But this wasn't meta. It was laziness in writing and ideas. And that sucks.
Happy Death Day (2017)
a really fun dark-comedy!
If you're looking for hard-core horror, this isn't it.
If you're looking for a dark comedy with lots of insane deaths and an actual worthwhile little twist at the end? It's so fun. Think "Ready or Not" or "The Babysitter" or even "Scream" and know that going in. It's just not "The Purge" or "Saw".
It's fun, it's dark, it's sweet, it's funny, and the lead actress was such a great fit for this part. There were some really interesting film-homage easter eggs, too. All in all, we fully recommend!
Panic (2021)
catches you off-guard with its excellence
I started watching this assuming it would be kinda like the "Slasher" series. It's not. It's so much more.
As I moved through the series, the rhythm and feel of it reminded me of something, I realized that "Panic" is the closest I've ever gotten to that feeling when you watch that first season of "Veronica Mars."
These are mostly actors with no big resume, and they are incredible! The actress who plays Sherri was so powerful; the portrayal of intractable depression is heartbreaking and real; and holy cow, the little Nicholson! He is something else. He just exudes who his character is and *as his character grows!
The insane chemistry between Ray and Heather is unreal. But unreal in a good way. Think back to my Veronica Mars comparison. I got to that by thinking, "I haven't seen chemistry like this since Logan & Veronica." It is HOT.
I loved every episode of this, I was amazed by the actors, the situations, the directions...and I'm sad it was cancelled.
The season we DO have, though, will sweep you into its current and you'll wish you could do that again for the first time.
Bob's Burgers: Some Kind of Fender Benderful (2021)
I don't watch Bob's Burgers for kids' programming...
This is just...unacceptable. Look, Bob's Burgers is our go-to rewatch show. We probably watch it every night, switching around episodes. In other words, we LOVE this show.
This episode...it felt like it was a reject from preschooler shows that I have watched way too much of. Did they do a drawing if rejected plots and just string them together?
We had to rewatch "The Hauntening" to get the taste of this disaster of an episode out our our mouth-brains.
Astral (2018)
so...where was the ending?
We decided to try this because it sounded good and we were curious why it was scored so poorly. Through 9/10 of the movie, we were like, "this is so much better than it's imdb score."
Then...the end.
Actually, maybe a better example would be-THE END.
That's what the movie does. It starts getting some real momentum and you're into it and then it's just OVER. Like they ran out of film or something. My husband put it well, I think: "The movie should have started about thirty minutes into the story and ended thirty minutes later."
So much of it seemed mainly about Alyssa, the super type-A girl, trying to get Alex to realize she's into him. That's seriously like a third of the movie. Well, that and his peripheral friends, who it seems like only the five of them go to school there. But that's easy to forgive. It's easy to get over. If that's the way it's plotted, it works...AD LONG AS YOU GET AN ENDING.
The spooks start appearing slowly, then much more rapidly. The doctor he sees who recognizes his pendant? Like, literally cut ALL of that. Work on exorcism issues just like they were. Then when they think it's okay, like when we see Alex got his brain working and brings Alyssa to meet his dad, THEN you see the drawing and it cuts away to give you his mom's view of the evening she kills her self. And instead of just ending, have them go back to the present. See Alex has gotten duped by the demon. (show him w the demon-black eyes or something.) and the demon moves through Alex to Alyssa and they have to keep Alyssa alive and it's like, redemption for them after the thing with his mom. SOMETHING.
This movie is so good for the whole of it! How can it just leave us hanging like that? (one no pun intended).
The Innocence Files: The Evidence: Indeed and Without Doubt (2020)
"why all the race talk?" BECAUSE IT IS REAL
Look, it befuddles me that someone who chose to watch this show gets panties in a wad about "race talk." Damn, you have watched this and you don't understand? I'm a white middle-class southern woman, and I feel compelled to address this whiny "race talk" stuff. Oh, you do t like it being called out? Poor you. Race is critical because it affected the case, the investigation, the legal representation, and the need for The Innocence Files to work to exonerate man that had so much exculpatory evidence and who was failed by the entire system. So are the rules written by white people? SHOW ME SOMEWHERE IN THE US THAT ISN'T. Hell YES they are. And if you can't put away your sorry self-pity as you watch this egregiously poorly-done investigation.
Get right.
I Am a Killer (2018)
Captivating and cerebral treatment of a complex topic
Do you want a straightforward show with a single narrative that puts a bow on top at the end?
Then skip it. Please. Because this is an incredible look at people struggling to come to terms with the effect of crimes, both for the victim's family, and for the perpetrators. Does it make you angry to hear a narrative that challenges the idea that cops do no wrong, those accused are likely guilty, and America's justice system is basically fair? Then this show will make you angry. It will.
There is so much to unpack. What creates killers? What crimes deserve the death penalty? Is the death penalty applied the same way to all defendants? Did the police do their due diligence? Did the prosecutor execute his duties in good faith? Was exculpatory or mitigating evidence withheld?
Is America's prison system about punishment? Rehabilitation? Revenge?
If you are interested in criminal justice, etc., then it's absolutely worth your time. The awareness and acknowledgment of the injustices should lead to better policies. There are people who are very dangerous, damaged, and incapable of being rehabilitated. But it's worth your time to watch this and consider the questions it raises.
The Grand Tour: Motown Funk (2019)
Appalling.
I have watched all the Top Gear shows as well as the Grand Tour. In general, they can be fun and interesting. I can't think of a time they've so abjectly infuriated me, however, as this episode. It's not funny that our country is falling apart, and it is DEFINITELY not a joke that Detroit is a heartbreaking example of what can happen to a once-great city. One of the best things going for Detroit right now are the incentivized reinvestments of those looking to bring it back to civilized living standards through community gardens, active renewal of historic homes, and small businesses and artisans who can enjoy Detroit because the cost of living is low. To see them drag race down public streets because "haha, this city is so pathetic there's no one with cars here, what a laugh!" viscerally disgusts me. Driving over vegetable gardens? Honestly, it's disgusting. I'm not saying Grand Tour needs to be The Great British Baking Show; I'm saying they could highlight and show some sympathy toward a once-great city that is rotting away. They could bring awareness to the plight. I thought we were getting close when they were in the theater and looking at those who had played there, until Hammond was like, "ah, this historic and beautiful property is now a multi-level parking garage. How beautiful and poetic."
No. It's not poetic. It's a tragedy for history and the people still trying to eke it out in the city.
I don't watch these shows looking for grand enlightenment. I watch it for fun. But this was far from fun. It was coarse, destructive, and honestly downright hateful at times. A terrible episode of a show that could stand a tiny bit more circumspection in their locations and treatment of the people and history of those locations.