bteigen Reviews

War of the Worlds (2005)

Intense

[7/10 · 30 June 2005]

I saw this just last night and I wasn't expecting much. I guess I sort of expected it to be a cheap (when I say cheap I mean lame) disaster flick with over-the-top special effects and bad acting. Having said that, the special effects, at times, were a bit over-the-top and the acting did get pretty bad in some points. The ending was not that good either. But the first hour or so of the film made up for any discrepancies.

I won't go into terrible detail with the plot. Guy not very good father, guy deals with troublesome teenage son and scared daughter. Aliens attack his home, guy and family flee to find mom in other city, lots of chaos, aliens unpredictable, etc. The film gets into the action pretty quick and the scenes of them running through the city getting vaporized by the machines and trying to leave on the ferry are particularly intense. The film is even more frightening because these aliens are ridiculously meticulous about their killing (as opposed to the aliens in Independence Day who just seem to blow up cities, these aliens are checking out every last farmhouse in the country for trace of life).

The film still has its faults. Tom Cruise isn't very convincing in his part, neither is Justin Chatwin as the son. What was the point in casting Miranda Otto in such a worthless role? Tim Robbins and Dakota Fanning probably give off the best performances. There are probably numerous problems with the aliens and their method of invasion but the only thing I can gripe about is their design is too close the aliens in Independence Day for comfort. The ending felt rushed and anticlimactic. But the tripods and such were really great and Spielberg totally captured the mass panic of an invasion while still keeping the focus on one family's dilemma.

Overall, 7/10

Star Wars: Episode III - Revenge of the Sith (2005)

Thank goodness we only paid $2

[2/10 · 10 June 2005]

I will say this for Star Wars: Revenge of the Sith...it wasn't as bad as Attack of the Clones. Having said that, nothing can get much worse than AOTC. Revenge of the Sith improves on storytelling a little bit, but the extremely poor acting and overwhelmingly ridiculous "special effects" made this seem less like a film and more like a boring video game. Watching someone else play Sonic the Hedgehog is more entertaining.

We were all excited to see Anakin finally switch to the Dark Side, but Lucas left us scratching our heads, thinking "Huh?" The scary Darth Vader in the original trilogy is born of a whiny brat that wanted to be a Jedi Master before everyone else and had a temper tantrum? Oh wait, there was also that possibility of Padme dying. I wasn't impressed. First off, I see no reason for Anakin and Padme to be in love. They have nothing in common, their relationship was trite in AOTC and it doesn't help that there is no chemistry between Hayden and Natalie. Watching their romantic scenes, if you could call them that, makes me long for Han Solo and Princess Leia.

I was expecting Ian McDiarmaid to be the powerhouse in this film. Meh. He was not really believable in "seducing" Anakin to the Dark Side. It was kind of like strangers luring little kids with puppies and candy. At times it seemed like he was advertising the Dark Side like a phone solicitor: hello, would you like a mortgage? Hello, the dark side will solve all your problems. The other villains were really boring too. General Grievous was pointless, like Christopher Lee in AOTC. These are sorry excuses for Darth Maul. With Darth Maul we had this cool aura of mystery and one of the best lightsaber duels in the Star Wars saga (even if the character was pathetically underused). In AOTC and ROTS, we have Christopher Lee-for-the-sake-of-having-Christopher Lee-in-our-movie. Now we have a CGI droid who could not have been more campy if he had been voiced by Hans Conreid or Jim Cummings, complete with a bad case of consumption. Doesn't sound like fun to me.

I've heard a lot of people lying about how dark and violent it is. Meh. Didn't feel really bad for the little kids as Anakin killing little kids was unbelievable anyway. Wasn't terribly sorry for the older Jedi since the only ones you get to know were Yoda and Obi-Won. Who cares about Ki-Ai-Mundi and Ayla Secura? The only people I felt sorry for were the Trade Federation people (not exactly sure why, maybe because they weren't Jedi) and that cute creature Kenobi was riding around on Utupau. Anakin being burned by lava was kind of cool.

Overall, it gets a 2/10. It gets a 2 because it is not AOTC and the last scene with Owen and Beru looking off into the sunset did not have any special effects (if there were any, they weren't as blatantly obvious as they are in the rest of the film). Bad way to end the saga, Lucas. You can join Stephen Sommers in the Club for Directors Who Destroy Worthy Potential.

The 5,000 Fingers of Dr. T. (1953)

It will leave you feeling rather uncomfortable

[3 January 2005]

This movie is one of the most bizarre and random films I have ever seen. It combines a mind-boggling storyline (a kid dreams he's trapped in a castle ruled by his satanic piano teacher who is setting up a piano camp for 500 players), intriguing characters (the heroic, down-to-earth plumber, the helpless, beautiful, damsel/mother in distress, the all-American kid on the block, and the disturbing, foppish, freak of a villain, Dr. Terwilliker) weird costumes and sets, and the most outrageous songs ever conceived. Among my favorites are the "Doe-me-doe" dress up song, "The Dungeon Song," and "We are Victorious!" Any orchestra geek will get a kick out of the dungeon ballet. This is a terrific film to scare your friends or corrupt your children. I highly recommend it to anyone with an unbalanced imagination.

Also recommended: The Brave Little Toaster, Time Bandits, Happily Ever After: a Snow White Tale, The Never Ending Story, Nightmare Before Christmas and Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory.

The Case-Book of Sherlock Holmes: The Eligible Bachelor (1993) Season 3, Episode 2

Strange movie

[28 December 2004]

*Spoilers* Based loosely off of "The Nobel Bachelor" and "The Veiled Lodger", The Eligible Bachelor comes off as an extremely weird movie. At some points it is uncomfortable watching it. The screenplay, mixing together two quite unlikely stories, is, for the most part, clever and entertaining, but there were several things that were unnecessary. The dream sequence was dumb and came off as some random thing they wanted to put in the film. Holmes needed to stop whining about Moriarty being dead. Lord St. Simon leaving his second wife to rot in a pit did not seem to fit well with the rest of the film. Maybe if we hadn't had those obnoxious nightmares, her situation would have been more shocking. The acting is good. The confrontation between Hettie and St. Simon in the condemned castle is powerful, and the violence is especially grisly. Paris Jefferson and Simon Williams are the standout performances. About a 6.5 out 10.

The Case-Book of Sherlock Holmes: The Master Blackmailer (1992) Season 2, Episode 1

Excellent story of intrigue and adventure - Spoilers

[9/10 · 23 December 2004]

The Master Blackmailer, based off of Sir Arthur Conan Doyle's short story, "the Adventure of Charles Augustus Milverton," is the first feature length Sherlock Holmes story with Jeremy Brett that I have seen. The story is interesting and dark. The film has a somewhat dreary, sad feel to it, but it is quite entertaining (with some especially funny scenes).

*Spoilers* Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson attempt to uncover the identity of an illusive blackmailer who has been ruining some of the most prominent families of England by publishing private letters that will, in one way or another, destroy their lives. They eventually find out that he is Charles Augustus Milverton, an "art dealer," after the few tragic consequences for victims that could not pay up. Our heroes must next help Lady Eva Blackwell, who must pay a sum that is beyond her means or else her upcoming marriage will most definitely be called off. The scene in which Holmes and Watson burglarize Milverton's house are intense. Although the film has an essentially happy ending, the tone is sad and regretful.

Outstanding performances by Jeremy Brett and Edward Hardwicke (as usual), and Robert Hardy as the notorious villain (most audiences probably recognize him today as Cornelius Fudge in Harry Potter), Serena Gordon as Lady Eva Blackwell, Norma West as Lady Swinstead and Sophie Thomson as Agatha (the scenes involving her and Holmes are a riot). I give it a ***1/2 out *****. My only complaint is that there wasn't enough Inspector Lestrade. (I wish they would have added in the scene at the end of the short story where he gives the description of the two burglars, one of which matches Watson.)

Saw (2004)

Entertaining psychological thriller

[8/10 · 7 November 2004]

I enjoyed this film thoroughly. It delivered great scares and a twist ending that puts 'The Village' and 'Signs' to shame. The script by Whannel, though not flawless, is highly imaginative. I don't think I'll be able to get Jigsaw and his brutal philosophies out of my head for a while. The only reason why I would downgrade this film is that, at times, the acting was extremely horrific, mainly on Cary Elwes' part. The script also seemed slack near the end. But all in all, it was an excellent film. I hope we see more of Whannel's writing and Wan's directing (possible sequeal-I hope so).

***1/2 out of *****

Twelfth Night, or What You Will (1988 TV Movie)

Very entertaining

[15 September 2004]

My senior English class read the play and watched the film simultaneously and I have to say that (although at first I was put off by the harsh music, and the set and costumes that reminded me too much of Mary Martin's Peter Pan) I really got into it. I thought all the acting was great, especially Maria, Toby, Andrew, Viola and Malvolio, but Anton Lesser as the clown, Feste, stole the show. He was definitely the most memorable character. My only complaint, really, is that sometimes the actors spoke the lines a little too fast. I highly suggest this to anyone that likes theater or Shakespeare.

****/*****

Bach's Fight for Freedom (1995 TV Movie)

Enjoyable

[29 July 2004]

We used to watch these movies in music class when we had nothing to do. This one and the one for Handel, I think were my favorites. I have no idea how accurate this movie is but it was better watching this than singing "We Are the World" or playing ukulele. The Duke character was funny and I liked how they showed Bach as a family man too. The little kid was entertaining as were his mindless parents. I think this one had the best music out of all of them. I recommend also Handel's Last Chance, Rossini's Ghost, Beethoven Lives Upstairs and the movie about Liszt to all those that detest singing and playing instruments in music class. Overall, I give it a 7/10.

The Island of Dr. Moreau (1996)

Not that bad

[18 July 2004]

Minor Spoiler

I haven't seen it in a while but I don't remember it being as horrible as everyone says it is. I remember reading the book and I didn't really like the book that much either. I guess it all depends upon personal preferences. I suppose the thing that really sucked about this film were the performances given by Kilmer and Brando. Honestly, Brando cannot talk to save his life. And Kilmer's performance as Montgomery was just ugh, especially after he goes 'insane.' David Thewlis, Fairuza Balk and everyone else were fine though. I liked Thewlis because he's doesn't fit the classic model for a hero. Maybe I would have liked it more if it wasn't so depressing, but the book was dark and dreary too, so I can't really say its bad.

King Arthur (2004)

Arthur=cheesy rendition of Spartacus

[8 July 2004]

Warning: possible spoilers

That's basically what it is. There's nothing special about this version of Arthur. If anything, it is a lot more dull than the traditional King Arthur. They blab on and on about freedom, and they never really explain what the heck they are talking about. I really didn't care for the characters of Arthur, Lancelot and Guinivere. Keira Knightley wins my award for Worst Costume Ever (yes, she even beats Catwoman). I really enjoyed characters like Bors and Tristram. They were the only ones with some depth.

Every time the Saxons came on, my friends and I started chanting "Grond!" "Grond!". They would have fit in right well with the orcs from LOTR. Merlin didn't do anything. I liked the Saxon king and prince a little, but they weren't that interesting for villains (unlike Mordred and Morgan leFay, the REAL villains of Arthurnian legend). The battle scenes weren't that cool. Overall, dumb slaughter flick.

Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban (2004)

Not sure whether I liked it or not

[6 June 2004]

This movie seemed to go by way too fast. There were some great moments in this film that could have been so much better had they just gone a little slower. It's not like anyone would have fallen asleep during it. Anyway, that was my big complaint. It went too fast in some parts. Below is some of the good and the bad...

(SPOILERS)

The Good: -Glad we did not have to spend so much time at the Dursleys, though they were better in this film -the Night Bus (or Knight Bus, unsure) rocked. Loved the talking head ornament -the Dementors (my friend squealed every time they came on) -Lupin, Snape, Sirius and Pettigrew were all awesome -Ron did not make as many faces -Harry was awesome, loved the sarcasm (can't wait to see him in Order of the Phoenix) -Time traveling scene was excellent -Music -Buckbeak

The Bad: -Totally UNDERUSED adults (Hagrid was the only one that got enough screen time -Total change in scenery -Music came in at wrong points -I don't think Dumbledore is that senial

Overall it was pretty good, but I liked the other films better, mainly because they were more fun. So far (since I need to see it again), I give it a 6/10.

Peter Pan (2003)

Was a good movie

[5/10 · 25 December 2003]

I guess the thing that annoyed me most about this film is that they advertised it to be scarier and darker than it really was. But overall, I enjoyed it. I thought the child acting though, particularly Wendy, was not that good, and everything just seemed sort of rushed (maybe that was because I had just seen LOTR not too long ago), especially with their lines. The beginning was kind of silly as well. But I think that Jeremy Sumpter made a great Peter Pan and I liked the little kids that played John and Michael. However, the real star of the film was Captain Hook. It was really interesting to see Jason Isaacs in his first starring role. He really delved into the character, the way he did for Tavington in 'The Patriot'. I wish they had more of him AND the other pirates in the movie. I give it what the website gives it...about a 7/10.