I don't even know where to begin... Zero character development, horrendous acting, idiotic plot, riddled with cliches. In short: just stunningly bad in every conceivable way.
Reviews
5 Reviews
Spectre
(I) (2015)
Not bad, but not Bond...
4 November 2015
First of all, I have to mention that I have been a James Bond fan since the day I was allowed to watch television (my first one was Goldeneye). Since then I've watched every Bond movie several times over and became addicted to the idea of Bond: a sophisticated, stylish, knowledgeable manly man that could get every girl. Bond is in that sense larger than life, not a realistic character. He is what every man hopes he could be (or could've been) but having the satisfaction no one ever will be quite James Bond.
Now to the movie Spectre. To give it its credit: it's not bad. The opening scene is phenomenal whether you're a movie critic or not. And the storyline is not great but not as bad as some people suggest. If it were any other movie, I would consider it a fairly decent job.
However, the protagonist simply isn't Bond. Every aspect that makes Bond who he is - emotionally reclusive, confident bordering arrogant, always (seemingly) in control - simply isn't there. Sam Mendes tried to give Bond a more human face, but in the process destroyed the original character. Bond is supposed to be a shallow character, because it makes him larger than life. Showing he is vulnerable might be nice for some viewers, but it is simply not Bond.
I wouldn't go as far as advising anyone against going to see this movie. I would, however, strongly recommend you tone down your expectations. Because you won't see Bond...James Bond.
Now to the movie Spectre. To give it its credit: it's not bad. The opening scene is phenomenal whether you're a movie critic or not. And the storyline is not great but not as bad as some people suggest. If it were any other movie, I would consider it a fairly decent job.
However, the protagonist simply isn't Bond. Every aspect that makes Bond who he is - emotionally reclusive, confident bordering arrogant, always (seemingly) in control - simply isn't there. Sam Mendes tried to give Bond a more human face, but in the process destroyed the original character. Bond is supposed to be a shallow character, because it makes him larger than life. Showing he is vulnerable might be nice for some viewers, but it is simply not Bond.
I wouldn't go as far as advising anyone against going to see this movie. I would, however, strongly recommend you tone down your expectations. Because you won't see Bond...James Bond.
As Above, So Below
(2014)
Decent but no prize for originality
21 August 2014
As I'm currently living in Paris and actually visited the Catacombes a few days earlier, I had high hopes for this film. The setup of the movie is promising as well, because the Catacombes can be quite scary. Therefore, a lot of ingredients for a good scary movie.
Alas, it turned out to be nothing of the sort. A very far-fetched plot, predictable scares, and the overly shaky hand-cam which is past its prime were the culprits of my disappointment. Add to that some flimsy romantic love story, and you got a mediocre film at best.
However, I do not want to give the impression that this movie was all bad. There were some pretty decent scares despite their lack of originality. I'm sure that if this movie would have come out ten years ago, it could have been a major hit. But after Blair Witch Project, Rec, and Paranormal Activity, it is difficult to insert a new angle into the whole hand-cam-genre.
So if you just want a decent scary movie for 90 minutes while keeping your expectations limited, Catacombes would be a decent choice.
Alas, it turned out to be nothing of the sort. A very far-fetched plot, predictable scares, and the overly shaky hand-cam which is past its prime were the culprits of my disappointment. Add to that some flimsy romantic love story, and you got a mediocre film at best.
However, I do not want to give the impression that this movie was all bad. There were some pretty decent scares despite their lack of originality. I'm sure that if this movie would have come out ten years ago, it could have been a major hit. But after Blair Witch Project, Rec, and Paranormal Activity, it is difficult to insert a new angle into the whole hand-cam-genre.
So if you just want a decent scary movie for 90 minutes while keeping your expectations limited, Catacombes would be a decent choice.
Our Idiot Brother
(2011)
Weak plot, superficial characters and above all: not funny
3 January 2012
As a big fan of Paul Rudd's movies like Forgetting Sarah Marshal and I love you man, I had big expectations for this one. It at least sounded as if it could be a very funny movie. But after 15 minutes I started to realise I was in for one boring ride (since I almost always finish the movies I started).
For one there's the amazingly weak plot. The director tries to tell a story about unconditional love and family honour, but fails miserably. This is mostly the consequence of the 2D characters in this movie: you just don't care what happens to them. The actors are not to blame entirely though, the script is terrifyingly bad. It's like they figured out during shooting that the script only lasted 45 min, so they intentionally dragged out the scenes to make the movie a full 90. The scenes are full of dialogues that just keep on going without actually going anywhere. 3 grownup women discussing their love lives falling apart for 10 minutes?! Come on!
But I could forgive all that if it would've been funny. They couldn't even make the leading character's drug deal with a cop in uniform funny (supposedly one of the funniest scenes), let alone the rest of the scenes.
So unless you believe that comedies are not made to make us laugh: don't watch this one.
For one there's the amazingly weak plot. The director tries to tell a story about unconditional love and family honour, but fails miserably. This is mostly the consequence of the 2D characters in this movie: you just don't care what happens to them. The actors are not to blame entirely though, the script is terrifyingly bad. It's like they figured out during shooting that the script only lasted 45 min, so they intentionally dragged out the scenes to make the movie a full 90. The scenes are full of dialogues that just keep on going without actually going anywhere. 3 grownup women discussing their love lives falling apart for 10 minutes?! Come on!
But I could forgive all that if it would've been funny. They couldn't even make the leading character's drug deal with a cop in uniform funny (supposedly one of the funniest scenes), let alone the rest of the scenes.
So unless you believe that comedies are not made to make us laugh: don't watch this one.
Insidious
(I) (2010)
Don't be overly cynical, just enjoy the really scary ride
21 June 2011
I've anticipated this movie for a few months now. And despite that it has a unoriginal storyline and is at times even a little corny (the opening credits will make you think of a lame Haunted House ride) it's the best horror movie I've seen since Paranormal Activity.
This is not because of its originality, because frankly: it is not. Actually, it's the unoriginality that makes this a very scary movie. It uses tested scare tactics to create a suspenseful atmosphere and a few body-jolting moments without it being ridiculous overdone like in Drag me to Hell. I was slightly disappointed that the ending spun a little out of control, but it couldn't bother me so much that I thought of it as a bad movie afterwards. Basically I expected a scary movie, I got a terrifying one. What more can you ask for?
It's very easy to dismiss this movie as one with a flimsy storyline or just plain ridiculous. But then you would miss the point of this film. It's not meant to have a great storyline. It's not meant to be original. It's just meant to scare the crap out of you for a (very, very) long hour and a half. And on that last point, it solidly delivers.
This is not because of its originality, because frankly: it is not. Actually, it's the unoriginality that makes this a very scary movie. It uses tested scare tactics to create a suspenseful atmosphere and a few body-jolting moments without it being ridiculous overdone like in Drag me to Hell. I was slightly disappointed that the ending spun a little out of control, but it couldn't bother me so much that I thought of it as a bad movie afterwards. Basically I expected a scary movie, I got a terrifying one. What more can you ask for?
It's very easy to dismiss this movie as one with a flimsy storyline or just plain ridiculous. But then you would miss the point of this film. It's not meant to have a great storyline. It's not meant to be original. It's just meant to scare the crap out of you for a (very, very) long hour and a half. And on that last point, it solidly delivers.
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