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The Terminal List (2022)
Client confidentiality
The idea is interesting but the plot holes are immense. Really, you going to tell me not a single security camera existed at a HOSPITAL? In the modern world, the idea of some huge cover up simply doesn't make sense because of the fact there's just so many cameras and data points to trace what actually happened.
Invasion (2021)
Apple, what have you done?
Usually I'm fine with a slow story, but this is a whole new level of nonsense. The producers are more concerned with making laughable commentary on social issues, than they are with filming an alien invasion. It's got everything: racial discrimination, disability, LBGT issues, sexism, the whole woke handbook has been thrown in where it doesn't belong, making for a terribly boring series.
Zack Snyder's Justice League (2021)
Don't even compare it to the 2017 release
It's breathtaking to see the redemption of this franchise by an epic, 4 hour long masterpiece, which so easily could never have happened. This movie is an absolute blockbuster, despite the runtime it's a fantastic watch.
After Hours (1985)
I just wanted to sleep
My girlfriend and I decided to watch this classic for the first time after seeing this high ratings, and the trailer looked pretty funny. Being a fan of quirky comedies such as The Office and The Gods Must Be Crazy, After Hours looked right up my alley.
There's a lot to appreciate here. The lead character is very easy to sympathise with as he takes on a night of events which grow progressively worse. The characters are unique to the movie and each interesting in their way. Humour comes from the 'wtf' moments when our relatively grounded protagonists has to deal with incredibly strange people and things going on around him.
Where the movie falls over is in its pacing. Too often dialogue will drag on, line deliveries will take twice the time they need to, and frankly scenes just play out much more longer than they need to. 30 minutes could easily be cut from this movie with more concise editing.
Ultimately the interesting but slow narrative culminated in a kind of morbid curiosity for us. Eventually I turned to my girlfriend and said "this movie is really boring but I want to know what happens...", we decided to skip to the end, missing around 15 minutes total.
It was a slow burn.
Black Summer (2019)
In a saturated zombie market, it still entertains
The zombie tropes have been seen time and time again throughout Hollywood zombie movies and tv shows, but regardless of it's low budget, Black Summer still manages to bring a fresh take on the genre.
There's plenty to enjoy here, including some brilliant extended length shots, story pacing to keep you hooked, and exciting action sequences.
The series is not without its flaws. Noticeable were errors in the film compositing (technical 'glitches'), characters making senseless decisions, and one particular episode that was missing story and felt like an entire episode went missing before it.
Having said that, I enjoyed this series simply for the entertainment value.
Ant-Man and the Wasp (2018)
Ironic lack of scale
Ant-Man and the Wasp is a fun movie with some neat tricks, but lacks the two essential elements of a super hero movie: a hero and a villain.
Sure, Ant-Man is in the movie, but he spends the duration either running around in a broken shrink-suit, or racing to get home to obligate his house arrest. These are two repeating tropes of the movie that bog it down and just seem like lazy plot devices. It's actually the Wasp who sines in this movie, carrying out most of the action in style, as opposed to Ant-Man fumbling around with malfunctioning equipment.
As for the villain, there's not much going on, it really seems like the producers tried to cram in a bunch of bargain-bin baddies instead of just having one exciting nemesis. At the end of the day, the villains of this movie are really just annoyances who got in the way of our hero's mission, rather than ever posing a threat to it.
Finally, the representation of science in this franchise is both cliche and nonsensical. Okay, it's just a fantasy movie, but can it at least be internally consistent? Some things get heavier as they're made bigger, some things get lighter as they're made smaller, and yet what about Ant-Man? When shrunk, he's able to punch with the weight of a full size adult, and in the first movie he broke a floor tile but simply landing on it, yet he's somehow light enough to be carried around by a flying ant?
Regardless of it's problems, the movie is still entertaining; it comes with plenty of laughs and doesn't take itself too seriously. I watched it through and, although the plot was just meaningless to me, the value was in the pacing and antics of the characters.
D.L. Hughley: Contrarian (2018)
Didn't laugh once and couldn't bare the pain
I could only watch this a few minutes before I was bored and unimpressed. Joke about whatever you like, I don't care, but jokes don't land when they rely on completely wrong statistics to make a racially motivated point.
Holmes & Watson (2018)
A Stupid Movie For Stupid People
My girlfriend and I walked out of the cinema at 15 minutes. Wish I'd checked the reviews before buying cinema tickets. This garbage plays out as a low-brow tv sketch show, and it's so boring we were both literally falling asleep!
With A-class comedy actors you would expect something above average, don't be tricked! Even the performance from John C Riley and Will Farrell is horribly bad.
A mix of immature slapstick and over-acted personas, the jokes do not land at all. And this movie will try to squeeze every last laugh out of every repetitive, boring gag.
Save your time and money, 100% skip this one.
Set It Up (2018)
Set It Up The Bomb
In two words: Cobbled. Together.
This Netflix original rom-com packs an ironic lack of chemistry. With the quality of an amateur movie project, each sequentil line and scene feels like it was shot repeatedly and had the best takes cut and stitched together, which results in conversations sounding completely unnatural, characters spouting punch lines where they don't belong, and a general lack of flow from each moment to the next.
Relationships between characters seem forced and unconvincing, especially the two main characters who work in the same building, yet had never seen each other before and now just drop in and out of each other's office space like they've been best buddies all along.
So far as laughs, unfortunately there is not much to offer as the circumstances in which the slapstick potty humour arises, is too far fetched to instil any grain of relatability to the audience. To put it another way, the writers seemed to borrowed tropes from the horror genre that make you think "no, don't go there, don't do that, oh god why are you doing that?!".
The Other Woman (2014)
A Senseless Woman's Revenge Fantasy
Dressed up as a comedy movie, the narrative surrounds three grown adult women who attempt to resolve an affair by playing childish pranks and eventually driving the man to self harm and bankruptcy.
Instead of speaking with the cheating husband about the affairs, our female protagonists think it funny to...
- Involuntarily alter his body by overdosing his drinks with female hormones.
- Dilute his shampoo with hair removing cream, causing him to lose his hair.
- Flush his toothbrush in the toilet...
- Pour dangerous amounts of laxative into his drink at a restaurant.
- Have a drag queen sexually assault him without consent.
All the while, the women are portrayed as strong supportive characters, with a cringey slow-motion beach shot where they all hold each other as if to say 'yeah girl power! we're all in this cruel vendetta until the end!'.
After the slew of assaults upon his person, they climax by confronting him, causing him to have a nervous breakdown, and they literally stand around watching as he breaks his nose and then trips into a glass pane that shatters and cuts him up. They literally just stand there watching. Nobody offers to check if he's okay or call an ambulance. I guess that's okay because he's a man.
The worse thing about this movie is that it is NOT a good portrayal of women, and there is something seriously wrong with society if we do find this funny.
Ready Player One (2018)
Never read the book. Hated the movie anyway.
You can summarise this movie as having a boring, nonsensical plot, which only serves to offer up the occasional nostalgia gimmick.
So much about this movie did not make sense. PLENTY of plot holes, technology that doesn't make sense, and motives that go totally unexplained.
It's weakest point is trying to blend in the virtual world with reality; the integration of this singular technology into society is totally unconvincing.
As if large groups of people would stop on the side walk to put their VR headsets on and start flailing their limbs around?
Why would people wear a suit that allows them to feel significant pain in the real world?
Why in five years did nobody try exploring the race track backwards?
Why was that chick playing victim so hard over an insignificant birth mark?
How the heck does a group of people not get tangled hanging from ropes inside a moving van?
Very disappointing.
Meek's Cutoff (2010)
You will die of boredom before they die of dehydration
In one word: GRUELING. Absolutely grueling.
I guess I went into Meek's Cutoff with high expectations, given the caliber of the actors involved and the gun-centric front cover...
What I got was possibly the worst film experience of my life; literally a bunch of characters wandering around in empty scenery for what seemed like eternity.
This movie had NO PAYOFF! I persisted through the entire boring thing, waiting to see what eventuates, and NOTHING HAPPENED! The entire film was pointless boring nothingness from start to end.
Spend your money on ANY western but this.
Before the Flood (2016)
A well intended, yet contrived look at climate change
Before The Flood is a great example of how NOT to propel the narrative of a very important issue. DiCaprio presents his case, at a time where climate change is as politically divisive as ever, by use of interviews, emotional pleas, and sprinkled with statistics. The intent is pure, but the delivery is irresponsible if anything.
The problem with this documentary is the raw lack of scientific rigidity; relying instead on emotional persuasions, such as people's personal anecdotes and cliché natural disaster imagery. Not to mention, the film is contrived with factually deceptive talking points such as the '99% of scientists' statistic. At one point, an interviewee irresponsibly refers to climate change using religious language, stating that deniers need to be 'converted to believe'; DiCaprio refers back to the religious iconography of a classic art piece throughout the film, and then goes on to speak with the Catholic pope of all people - the very antithesis of science.
This film will do little to persuade people who deny climate change, but will instead reinforce people who already understand that climate change is a real issue. What the film fails to understand is that deniers really are skeptical, and will not be convinced by emotional grovelling in the year 2016 - what's needed instead is cold hard scientific evidence, free of politics and bunked mantras - you will not find this here.
The Deer Hunter (1978)
Where are the good bits?
A bunch of redneck douche bags terrorize a small town, driving recklessly and littering empty beer cans everywhere they roam, they then stumble onto the set of some other movie where a pointless one hour wedding sequence is being filmed, before three of them head over to the next studio where apparently a war movie is being filmed. Douchebag one returns home to continue living the redneck life and steal Doughebag 2's girlfriend; Douchebag 2 can't find his way off the war set, gives up and shoots himself in the head; Douchebag 3 returns home and doesn't speak another coherent sentence for the remainder of the movie. Then they all sing 'God bless Merica'.
Weird or What? (2010)
Boring Psudoscience Rubbish
Absolute mind numbing rubbish. This is the first IMDb review I've made, I couldn't watch this and NOT publicly express my discontent.
First of all I'd like to know what Bill's definition of the word 'weird' is, as 90% of what I saw (in the one episode I watched) was extremely mundane, and was always followed by the host reflecting with "is that weird, or what?". No William, it's not 'weird', you're obviously just predisposed to believing supernatural rubbish and aren't bright enough to identify simple logical fallacies.
To provide an example of the fail inherent to this show, one segment approached the case of 'three eye witnesses of a time traveler!', reenacted the witness accounts, and then made absolutely no effort to debunk the extraordinary claims of these individuals (actually just 3 acquaintances who all knew each other), except to go on and explain that time travel of a completely different kind is known to technically occur in accordance with the laws of relativity - something which has NOTHING to do with the original witness claims. Sorry Bill, but I want to go back to those claims and examine the FACTS...
- only one witness supposedly saw the female traveler 'materialise' - the remaining two witnesses saw the supposed traveler, but did not see anything supernatural occur - at least one witness is a science fiction novelist, obviously he will be predisposed to perceive what he saw as a 'time traveler' - the witnesses claim the materialized woman to be a time traveler, although they never spoke to her, saw her again, or communicated with her in any which way (how on earth did they conclude 'omg time travel!!' ???) - there is NO EVIDENCE THAT THE WITNESS CLAIMS ARE TRUE; no camera footage, no repeat occurrences, no unrelated accounts, nobody actually admitting to being a time traveler, nothing!
It scares me when I see people on here saying things like "this is our favorite family show!!"; honestly you belong to a family of dolts if you believe this stuff.. I think that says it all. Peace.