Bleeding_Eyes Reviews

X-Men Origins: Wolverine (2009)

Meh, thanks again Hollywood.

[3/10 · 20 April 2009]

i'm puzzled why this actually has a OK overall rating here.

this film is cut from the same cloth as x-men 3 not 2, i.e underdeveloped characters, predictable and disappointing fight scenes/set pieces, bad dialogue, poor editing and shoddy wire work.

the only redeeming thing about this film is sabertooth also there's a couple of funny one liners. that's your lot. really.

jackman's still on auto pilot from x-3, gambit was very disappointing and nothing more than a glorified cameo. don't even get me started on deadpool.

go watch dark knight, watchmen or x-men 2 again instead, you'll have a much more enjoyable experience...

The Darjeeling Limited (2007)

Anderson Hits Rock Bottom

[2/10 · 23 February 2008]

I have enjoyed Anderson's earlier efforts. Bottle Rocket (very funny), Rushmore (a sheer delight), Royal Tenembaums (not bad) and Life Aquatic (good fun). However, i found this to be largely crass, pointless and amazingly obvious. This is the kind of film that annoying young whipper snappers who wear skinny jeans, brandish ipods and have free access to their parent's bank accounts, who happen to feel the need to go to Thailand or India in order to discover themselves in the most clichéd possible way, will enjoy.

I found it hard to empathise with any of the characters - they are merely a series of quirky quirks who live through moments, admittedly played well by Wilson, Schwartzman and Brody, but even good performances cannot save this dross. India itself is only used as a colourful backdrop and there are only so many slow mo soundtrack scenes one person can bear.

The film is a mish mash of some of the worst metaphors that I have seen in any film, EVER. When the three brothers finally discover themselves, they literally throw their 'baggage' away as they run for the leaving train (in slow mo whilst some music is playing, i might add, aarrrrgh!). I can't remember the last time I've seen something as laboured as this trying to pass itself of as something interesting and multi layered.

If i had a De Lorean, i'd hit 88mph, go back to the point when i first decided that i wanted to watch this atrocity and say to myself "don't do it, trust me, i'm you from the future and i've seen it".

A complete waste of time. You have been warned.