Sam_Movie_Buff Reviews

The Grudge 3 (2009)

This 'Grudge' Has Got Tiresome...

[3/10 · 31 January 2009]

As a fan of "Ju-On" and the 2004 remake―starring "Buffy The Vampire Slayer" actress Sarah Michelle Gellar―I had high hopes for this third installment. I mean, after the abysmal 2006 sequel, it couldn't get any worse, right? Wrong. Granted not as tedious and insipid as the sequel, this 2009 follow-up starring actress Shawnee Smith still leaves a bitter taste in the mouth.

Where to start... ?

Director Toby Wilkins tries to duplicate the eeriness and unpleasantness of the first movie, but sadly, fails miserably. With half-hearted acting, bad special effects, and a tiresome plot, the movie never picks up or satisfies. Whilst watching the movie, I realized the overall story of the franchise has never evolved; or more to the point, no one has tried to take a fresh approach. Much like the sequel, the third stab is a series of flat, horror-lacking murder sequences, and what makes this even worse is, we already know what's coming. Scene after scene after scene, the previous formula is recycled. We hear the now trademark 'Grudge' sound, we hear a small boy running, we hear the cry of a cat ― and that's pretty much it. There is only so many times you can show a pale-faced, dark haired Japanese woman with her dead son and their dead cat, until it's just not scary anymore. The franchise needs new ideas. We need new stories and new locations. Otherwise, this 'Grudge' is going to be on a constant loop.

My advice, stick with the original or the 2004 remake. There's nothing you haven't seen before here.

One thing I will say is, I'm surprised this movie is getting the direct-to-DVD treatment and the second one had theater status. Although both are severely mediocre, IMO, I wasn't left completely catatonic after watching the third.

Prom Night (I) (2008)

Take it for what it is!

[4/10 · 19 July 2008]

So, before I begin, one thing I really need to stress.

To all the bad reviews on here with "high hopes" or "expectations" ....... The movie is called Prom Night, what did you expect?

Yes, the movie is unbelievably cliché, yes, the characters are your typical teen/horror movie characters, but again -- the movie is called Prom Night.

I'm tired of listening to folk whine about how upset they are that movies like Prom Night turn out with the aspects I stated above.

Your teen slasher is always |ALWAYS| going to turn out like this. Sure, some will be better than others, but when it comes down to it, they're all the same. Centers on the girl, her friends get slaughtered because the "stalker" wants to get close to her, the cops try save her, she almost dies, they shoot, stab or set him on fire -- the end.

Right? Yes.

Now, Prom Night wasn't the best I've seen from this genre, not even half-way, but, there were a good few scares here and there that I will admit to gasping too.

The main problem with this movie was, the usual story (I stated above^) was too obvious, even for a movie like this. She looks in the mirror, he's there, she turns - he's not there. The friend has an argument with her boyfriend, she goes up-stairs to chill = killing time.

The biggest thing that got to me was the choices these teens made, for instance.

The Prom is held at a well-off, beautiful hotel. Towards the end of the movie, the cops take over and tell everyone to leave - so you leave, right? No.

The automated voice is talking over the loud speaker: "Emergency, please leave the building" (repeated over and over). So, what does the girl do?

"Oh I forgot my moms shawl, it's up-stairs" of course, because that's the first thing you worry about, naturally.

There are about one hundred of those "shawl" moments in this movie that it just gets you thinking, it's now 2008, can't they come up with anything better?

Now, I'm not gonna take a pop at the actors, because their acting was good, but with this material, there's only so much you can do.

Go into this movie the way I went into it. I expected the expected, and I was right.

Don't go into a slasher movie titled, "Prom Night" thinking you're gonna get a stunning piece of film.

It's just not common logic.

The Simple Life (2003–2007)

A great show......when you don't read into it.

[6/10 · 5 May 2008]

Everyone has their opinions on this show. You either love it or hate it. Personally, I love it. It's a piece of harmless fun. A funny show with exaggerated concepts and unrealistic motives. But lovable all the same. If you take The Simple Life as simply just fun, then it's a great show. If you read into it, and examine every single aspect, it's not so great.

When it comes down to it, The Simple Life is fake. They want you to believe these girls (Paris Hilton & Nicole Richie), have been stripped of everything that's important to them (money, credit cards, cell phones etc...)When in fact that's not the case. When you see pictures of them and the title reads "On set of The Simple Life" - that pretty much says it all. It's not supposed to be set up, it's supposed to be real. Is it scripted? Of course. Should it be, given the description of the show? No, it shouldn't.

The BIGGEST thing that gives this away is the editing. It's awful. Throughout the course of the season, you see the girls wearing the exact same outfits, hairstyles, looking exactly the same as previous episodes. And something tells me Paris & Nicole don't wear the exact same thing (EXACT TO A T), as previous weeks ago. It's so obvious none of it is real. So, I guess if you notice this, then yeah.. it's a fake show. Not reality.

When they say at the end of the finale "Yeah! We did it." They want you to believe they survived a month without their beloved credit cards, when really the truth is "Yeah, we finished filming."

Hatchet (2006)

One of the best movies I have seen in a long while!

[10/10 · 15 February 2008]

Where to begin on how much I enjoyed, loved this movie! When I purchased "Hatchet", I thought I was in for like a Texas chainsaw, House of wax type movie. I couldn't have been more wrong - turns out that was an excellent surprise. As I watched more, I realised the movie was more of a spoof/horror. Now don't go thinking this is like "Scary Movie", etc.. It's not. When it's time for the horror - it's horror, bloody scary and provides many scream out loud moments. But in between those excellent, sick, gory scenes - there is humour, a lot - and it's brilliant. Many people complained the movie had "typical horror characters". The dumb blonde, the bitchy brunette, the nerd etc.., when they don't realise that was the intention. The characters poke fun out of the ridiculous, sometimes stupid things your typical horror characters do and say. Like, why would you walk to the killers house if you know he's in there?. Why would you stand and scream for like a minute, giving the killer a chance to hack you off, instead of bolting the second you saw him?. And so on. This movie is now one of my top 10 horrors ever! People ask why? it's a spoof. Yes, but a totally different kind. As I explained before. When the horror scenes hit, it's real, grisly, shocking horror at it's best. You wanna block out the sound and close your eyes because of the terrifying death scenes you are seeing. Then the humour comes around, making you laugh at these stereotypical characters.

Don't listen to the bad reviews. This is indeed a horror movie. Just a different kind. It's a spoof/horror, but different to what you're used to seeing.

The movie kicks ass and is truly a great DVD to add to your scare collection. I was talking about the movie for weeks. GET IT NOW!

House of Wax (2005)

It will surpass the original. But really it's nothing special.

[6/10 · 13 February 2008]

The "House Of Wax" remake did indeed surpass the original. The overall story and atmosphere was captured better in this flick than the Vincent Price take. But it's really nothing to shout about. Even though It's semi-entertaining throughout, It's still one of those teen, cliché slasher horrors. Your typical run of the mill stalk and slash. While the idea never gets boring (if it's done right), "House Of Wax" manages to borrow every single cliché moment in modern horror. What horror movie doesn't these days?

The story is very simple. 19/20 year olds are driving trying to get to a big football game. They stop and camp out in the woods - the terror begins. The only thing that makes this semi different to, lets say "The Texas Chainsaw Massacre, "Wrong Turn" etc.., is the Wax storyline. Which was so/so interesting. The House Of Wax itself was surprisingly well done. I do give them props for that. However, the overall story surrounding the picture was beyond mediocre. Why do these horror filmmakers always have to have the "deformed" storyline. Seriously. We have it in every damn horror movie. The boy was disfigured, he hid out in his room, his parents neglected him, yada, yada, yada - you see where I'm going with this. Can they never come up with anything new. Maybe he was a woman first, no? Anything but that damn disfigured story.

The course of the movie runs pretty well. I mean, I never nodded off to sleep. But there were some moments that were just too predictable. So usual horrorish. The newer horror movies should have more story, more surprises up their sleeve. Unfourtunetly "House Of Wax" could be any late 80's horror movie - minus the bad effects. One thing I will say is, the acting was pretty damn good. I mean, most of the "teens" could act. Elisha Cuthbert and Jared Padalecki were the highlights of this movie for me (on the acting aspect). Elisha has a great versatile approach about her. She can go from the typical blonde cute girl, to a more stripped down character with depth. In her scared, tense, scenes, she was really believable. Jared is just an all round great, talented actor. If you're a fan of his TV show "Supernatural" (amazing show) you will already be aware of his acting chops. His acting is just so unique - like he's not even acting. It's like he is this character.Jared (IMO) should have been the leading male. Instead they gave it to One Tree Hill actor Chad Michael Murray - who played the role of the "bad boy" well. Towards the end of the movie he showed a different side to his brooding, bad boy character. It showed he had depth. Good character development. Then we get to the Oscar winning actress that is Paris Hilton. You know what, I'm not even gonna lie. I feel Paris did okay in the movie. Her performance wasn't catastrophically bad. I mean ,she was just the dumb blonde - so she was basically playing herself. Props to her for her big "death scene" though. She did a good job.

THE END: Well, it was a tad far fetched. You expect us to believe the whole house was made of pure wax. Come on? SCRIPT ERROR. Though the fact the whole house was made of wax is fairly stupid - the visual aspect of the ending was amazingly done. Big highlight of the movie.

All in all "House Of Wax" is a successful American horror remake. It did what it was supposed to do - entertain for an hour and a half. It's an above average slasher flick. Even though it has some plot holes and minor script flaws, I would still recommend it.

Halloween (2007)

Rob Zombie is the director. Need I say more?

[1/10 · 12 February 2008]

I knew this "remake" was never going to surpass the original. I mean, I'm all for remaking classics. Sometimes the remakes come off better. But Rob Zombie should have known from the get go, you can't remake Halloween - you just can't. It's impossible. The film is a horror classic and will remain one for centuries. He could have however, tried and made a decent attempt, but he didn't even succeed in that. This "Halloween 2007" is in one word: Insulting.

Yes. Ineed it is, insulting to the original. Pathetic even. Rob Zombie (The Devils Rejects) turned "Halloween" into another one of his trashy, sexed up, so called "horror movies." It could have been anyone else. Why, god why did it have to be Zombie? The cast mostly consisted of "The Devils Rejects" Z listers (he tends to do that in a lot of his films - why I don't know! These actors are nothing to brag about) The acting was appalling - terrible. The movie ran at a snails pace. The first 40 minutes of the movie is about little Michael, just before he kills his family. Rob tries to connect with the audience, giving us reasons why Michael is so bad. Why he is so twisted and evil. Why he makes these horrific decisions. Almost asking for sympathy. What Zombie doesn't realise is, what makes Michael tick isn't all that interesting. There is no need to know. It's much scarier that the reason Michael likes to kill is because - he enjoys it. He loves it. This is terrifying! This is what made the original work. He was always named "The Boogeyman". Pure evil. No soul. No heart. All he wanted to do was kill. Zombie's version is basically saying Michael kills because he had a terrible childhood. That's not scary. Doing this made (2007's Michael) your average, bland horror killer. Michael Myers does not have a conscious. He doesn't have a soul. He is PURE evil.

Rob claims his version isn't a remake, it's simply his take - yeah right. After the boring 40 minutes about Michael, the rest is basically the original jammed into the remaining 50 minutes. He focused so much on Michaels back story that he actually forgot he was in fact shooting "a remake." He failed on all accounts. There was no tension, no suspense, no fear. It's just a pointless remake. In the first movie you got the impression Michaels parents, sister and living life was pretty normal. His parents appeared to be sophisticated, sensible - normal parents. What did Rob do? he managed to turn Michael's living life into a trailer trash show. Like something from The Jerry Springer Show, and of course he had to make Michaels sister a total slut. "Laurie" was another issue. In her first 2 minutes on screen she manages to display a sex joke. Do we all remember Jamie Lee as Laurie? Very virgin like. Not Rob's version, but that's no surprise - his idea of horror is "The Devils Rejects." He has no intention of character development. Another ridiculous scene was Michaels "Escape scene"/ Sex Scene. Yep, you guessed it! Rob found some way to turn Michael's escape scene into a short porn preview. Are you surprised? Probably not if you've seen his other "projects". As usual with Zombie, the word "F-u-c-k" must have been said 123,000 times in this movie. God forbid Rob do a horror movie with no sex or sex dialogue.

All in all "Halloween 2007" is disastrous. I dreaded the day Halloween was going to be remade, but I never thought it would lay in the hands of Zombie. There are two types of horror movie. One is the original Halloween. A movie based on pure suspense and real terror. The second, a filthy horror/porn session that basically sums up what Zombie is about as far as directing goes - your direction was abysmal. You managed to turn a well respected, classic horror movie into another one of your filthy, trashy B type horror's. I really hope the rumours of Zombie doing the "Friday The 13th" remake are false. I don't think I could stomach it.

Urban Legends: Bloody Mary (2005 Video)

Possibly the worst movie I have ever seen.

[1/10 · 12 February 2008]

God. I don't know where to begin with this one. "Urban Legends: Bloody Mary" has to be one of the worst horror movies I have ever seen. Definitely a top 10 contender. Here we have the third instalment of the Urban Legend franchise, this time changing it up (yeah, such a smart idea). Instead of the UL usual stalk and slash story's, this time they're brining a supernatural aspect. To be more specific, Bloody Mary. Thrilled? I think not. When the movie ended, I was kind of lost for words. I was a big fan of the original. With it's smart script, great setting, talented cast and more than enough scares, it was an instant classic. The second addition "Urban Legend: Final Cut" was nowhere near up to the standards of the first, but it was entertaining enough and a decent sequel. This however is catastrophic. This was only made for the sake of having a trilogy.

The movie has so many flaws and plot holes, it's just too hard to name them all. I would also suffer a severe head pain actually trying to go through the movie again - it sounds terrifying just thinking about it - but for all the wrong reasons. If I had to pick one thing that stood out the worst, it would have to be the story. Bloody Mary?, come on, give me a break. Seriously. The third Urban Legend should have been a slasher, fright fest. Going back to the true, original style of the first. Though, I know it would have never measured up to it's first, I would have probably respected it a lot more. The story is just lazy. It lacks any real spark. It's like they read one of the most boring takes on the several Bloody Mary stories, and turned it into a film.

The second flaw would have to be, yep, you guessed it, the terrific acting. Man was it bad. Every single "actor" was bad. When I say everyone - I mean everyone! Not one of these Z listers has a decent shred of good acting abilities in them. This made the film appear cheap and unprofessional. All I wanna know is, who did the horrific casting job? They should be fired! All in all this film was more than below average. More so in fact that it doesn't even deserve 1 star. It's a terrible piece of film and should be avoided at all costs!

The Grudge 2 (2006)

Please hold my lines up higher so I can see.

[1/10 · 12 February 2008]

Before I review, please listen to all the bad reviews. I usually don't, but this is an exception. The Grudge 2 doesn't even deserve a 4.6/10 rating - that's being way too generous! Being a fan of the first (the remake), I really can't believe this sequel. It nearly drove me into an unconscious sleep. I couldn't believe my eyes. This had to be a joke, right? There's no way THIS was the follow up to the 2004 hit starring Sarah Michelle Gellar.

The movie is down right awful and doesn't even deserve 1 star. The film consists of lame, cliché scare tactics, used in modern Hollywood horror. In the first movie, you only caught glimpses of the "black haired, lady", and when you did see her, you were terrified. But this? You see her everywhere, to the point it gets extremely ridiculous. They used the same scares over and over again, throughout this too long (1 hour and 40 minutes) movie. I swear, I felt as though the film had been on for a full day - it's that draining. You feel tired after watching. Drained. They should use The Grudge 2 in sleep clinics.

They took away the "house" idea, instead the curse seems to be everywhere. Effecting breakfast meals and your casual craving for milk (watch the movie, you will understand). There is only so many times you can use the image of a Japanese woman and her son with his very annoying cat, until it's just not scary anymore. The acting was shockingly bad, apart form the wonderful Sarah Michelle Gellar, who I applaud for only appearing in this tripe for 9 minutes. The female lead was too boring. You didn't care about her. She had no charisma. The male lead was even worse. He looked as though he was reading his lines off of the females forehead - laughable performance.

My advice? Run while you still can. You don't have to be tortured. Feel sorry for us that were.

Pulse (I) (2006)

"They want what they don't have anymore - they want life"

[9/10 · 11 February 2008]

I saw the incredibly creepy tailer for "Pulse" while at the movies, and couldn't wait to see it. The cinematography was stunning and the film itself looked very interesting. It wasn't just your average horror. This was end of the world (evacuate your homes) horror! So did the movie live up to it's 2 minute trailer? - indeed it did. "Pulse" was one of the scariest movies of 2007.

Some will probably pass this by, targeting it as "Another Japanese remake." I understand why. Though I'm a fan of "The Grudge", "The Ring", etc.. The idea does get some what tiresome. More and more of these popular Japanese stories, legends are being remade for American audiences. Some say there is no need. They look at it the same way as remaking a cult classic such as "The Texas Chainsaw Massacre." - Why bother? Others on the other hand (myself) think remaking cult classics & popular Japanese movies is a great idea. A lot of people today will not watch Japanese films - simply because of the subtitles. Many won't watch old horror movies because they feel it's too dated. So I think bringing those great stories back to the silver screen is a great idea. Whether they do any justice to the original - that's a different story.

"Pulse" (In my opinion) is one of the better Japanese remakes. But sadly the film received mostly negative reviews. The thing I realised was, most people weren't targeting the actual movie, it was like I said before. They were bored of the whole Japanese thing. So It was very overlooked. If it had been released before "The Ring", or "The Grudge" - the rating and reviews would have been a lot higher.

The movie is very different from it's other contenders. Some will be happy to hear the movie doesn't feature a little girl/woman with long black hair and bulging red eyes. It's also not based on a curse. The evil was hatched from a virus in a computer. It unleashed these powerful, nightmare monsters, abeling them to get you through your phones, lap tops, wi-fi etc.. Things that we use in our ever day lives.

The monsters are very different - they're normal people. Only they're body's have been drained. They drain everything that makes you, you. So all you wanna do is die. Then you become "one of them." The monsters are very haunting. They are genuinely frightening. There's no lurking in the shadows, spying on you. When they want you - they're gonna get you.

Kristen Belle plays the lead female "Maddie". A young girl in college, who suddenly starts to realise somethings going on. Kristen is a great actress and she showed a whole different side of herself on here. When your a star of your own TV show (Veronica Mars) it's difficult to break that mold. To not be the same character everyone knows you for. To appear as someone else. Kristen did an amazing job. Her acting is very genuine. Very real. She brings real emotion and character to this movie - plus she can scream in almost 10 different ways. The rest of the cast all did a superb job. Especially the talented singer/actress "Christina Milian" - she surprised me in this movie. She's very natural and has a great screen presence.

All in all "Pulse" is a top notch horror flick. Great script, great acting, great CGI, great suspense - the list goes on.

If you want to be truly scared. Put down "The Ring" and snatch "Pulse" - you wont be disappointed!

The House on Sorority Row (1982)

A terrible, horrendous HORROR CLASSIC!

[10/10 · 10 February 2008]

First, whoever was quoted saying "In the style of Halloween" was clearly stupid, because this is in no way in the style of Halloween.

Okay - lets get this straight.

The House On Sorority Row is indeed a cheap, bad slasher/horror movie, but it knows this and understands where it stands. Everything is bad! The special effects (If you can call it that), the plot, and of course, the worse thing of all - the so called "acting". But It's so bad, that you find yourself actually liking it, a guilty pleasure if you will. One of those films you watch when you wanna get a good old laugh with your friends on a Friday night watching a bunch of DVD's.

The plot is fairly simple. There is a big old Sorority house. The girls hate the house mother. They play a prank on her. It goes wrong. They try to cover it up. Then suddenly body's start to pile up - that's basically the whole movie.

There are so many laughable moments in the movie - it's too funny for words. For instance. The house mother - I don't know the actress who plays her, but it's not even her voice in the movie. She is lip syncing to someone else's voice, and poorly I might add. Also, one of the sorority girls "Morgan" who I can only assume slept with the director to get the part, is indeed the most terrible actress I have ever seen on screen. Cringeworthly bad.

All in all even though The House On Sorority Row has it's flaws (big understatement) it's still a classic 80's horror flick. If you're looking for a bad horror movie with bad acting and terrible effects - this movie couldn't be more perfect.

If you want a creepy, old horror movie. Pass this one quick!!!

They (2002)

"They come for me.", - "Who comes?" ........"THEY"

[10/10 · 10 February 2008]

"They" is a hidden gem, and an extremely underrated horror.

This is real Horror. The kind that makes you scared to turn off your light. The physicological kind. The very thing nightmares are made of. We have all had "those dreams", whether in our childhood or adult life's. We always have a fear that something is coming for us. Something bad. We don't know what, all we know is - they are going to get us. "They" is a well crafted modern horror, with a slight old school vibe. Forget all the new high budget, best CGI Hollywood offerings. This is far better.

It's now 2008 and "They" still remains in my top 10 favourite Horror movies of all time. Why? It's everything you want in a great Horror. Scary, eerie, creepy, unsettling, claustrophobic - that's what we want, right? When making a Horror movie (that you want to be successful) you have to have suspense - great suspense. "They" has a tremendous amount of suspense from start to end. It has all of those "No, don't go in there moments", but not like your typical, average Horror. It's different. It understands it's audience, and what the audience wants. It delivers in all the right ways.

I've read a lot of bad reviews for this movie - why I don't know. It makes no sense to me. Does no one know what a great Horror movie is anymore? Has almost everyone been fooled by the (oh so generic) Hollywood cheap scare tactics? - maybe so. One thing I do want to point out is, "They" was released in 2002. "Darkness Falls" was released in 2003. So "Darkness Falls" took all of They's ideas. I'm tired of reading reviews were people are complaining saying how "They" ripped of "Darkness Falls". Get all the facts before you accuse.

All in all "They" is one of the best Horror movies I've ever seen. It scares you to your core. It leaves a lasting impression. It's genuinely frightening. It will leave you feeling more than satisfied.

Well, what are you waiting for? Get "They" now!

Satan's Little Helper (2004)

Do you want some cider? - cider can solve everything!

[3/10 · 10 February 2008]

Satan's Little Helper is one of the better B Horror movies I have seen. When I say better I mean the story. The film hatches a new plot, something that's not so cliché in the Horror genre - something fresh. But there are also some ridiculous questions that come along with it. Questions you will be asking yourself throughout the movie.

The film first caught my attention while I was cruising the Horror section in HMV. I was tired of all the so called "terrifiying" Hollywood blockbusters and wanted something different. The cover art for Satan's Little Helper immediately caught my attention. As you can see, the image draws you in - it's chilling! I knew it was a straight to DVD release - but I took a chance. I mean, I just seen "Boogey Man" the night before - so It couldn't get any worse! After I watched the movie, I was semi-satisfied. I loved the plot of the movie. It was really creepy how the killer was pretending to be the little boys friend, so he could kill. In some sick deranged way, he actually thought he and the little boy would become partners - a duo of terror. It was a great idea to set the film on Halloween night. This way, no one would think anything of a masked man beside a little kid. They would simply think he was his guardian. But, this is also where the "plot holes" begin to surface.

If your son came home with a "friend" he met trick or treating - that's fine. You wouldn't think anything of it - if he was 9!, or round about the same age as him. If however, he appeared with a strange man in a mask, you would be startled and protective of your child. You would ask the man to remove his mask and identify himself. You would ask why he is with your son. He doesn't know him. You would tell him to please leave. He isn't a family friend. He's a stranger. Now, we're supposed to teach our child not to talk to strangers. In this case, the mum is completely fine with it. Huh? They never seem to think it's a tad odd that the "man" doesn't speak - at all. Gruanted they think it's the daughters boyfriend, but after 10 minutes of not talking you would pull the mask off and ask him why he's not saying a word.

The film goes down hill from there. The thing that got me the most was, all the mum said was "Do you want some cider?". I can't count how many times she says this in the movie. It's like, oh you're dying - we have cider though, it's all good!! The movie started promising, and failed to deliver. It was more of a horror/comedy, and even as that it fails to deliver. I guess you could call it a "Dud","Flop" etc..

The best thing about the movie is the cover art. Though, something tells me that's not worth the 12 dollars!

I Know Who Killed Me (2007)

"She looks just like her, but it ain't Aubrey"

[10/10 · 8 February 2008]

Okay. I have been dodging this movie ever since it was released on DVD. Not because I didn't want it - I did. But after reading all the bad reviews (who I quote) say it's "The worst movie they've ever seen" It kind of puts you off. I decided to just go with my instincts and buy the movie. I mean, I'm already a massive Lindsay Lohan fan so I figured If the movie sucked, at least there are some great pole dancing scenes.

I've just finished watching the movie, and I must say I'm glad I went ahead and purchased. I think the people who called this movie "Boring, pathetic, confusing" didn't understand it. They didn't get the story. I also have to say, to the people who said the film was extremely predictable, are you joking? It's not at all. The movie has you guessing right to the end. You will be asking yourself all different kinds of questions. Isn't that what a great movie is about?? I think the reason this movie was panned was because "Lindsay Lohan". At the time of it's release, Lindsay was in the media constantly for partying, doing drugs, getting DUI's etc, so when the movie finally hit the screens, most of the public categorised the movie with her personal life - this is unfair. Lindsay is a great actress and carries the movie amazingly. She showed her fans she can make the stretch from cute girl in "Mean Girls" to sexy, pole dancing, tortured girl in a thriller. She done a great job. People on here calling her performance "laughable" are obviously haters.

Take a chance on this movie, like I did.

SPOILER.

Audrey Fleming (Lindsay Lohan) has a twin sister named Dakota Moss (Lindsay Lohan) that was separated at birth. Susan Flemings real baby died at birth and a junkie woman down the hall had twins, so behind Mrs. Flemings back Daniel Fleming pays the junkie to keep one of the twins. The real Aubrey was kidnapped by a serial killer (who turns out to be her piano instructor Douglas) and while he's torturing her, in another town Dakota is having the same exact things happen to her unexplainably (turns out to be they're stigmatic twins). So Dakota comes to her town to find out what is going on and is found severely injured on the side of the road so they believe its Aubrey. Dakota spends the whole movie trying to prove that she isn't Aubrey. She eventually finds out what is going on and Mr. Fleming helps her get to the killer. Douglas kills Mr. Fleming then Dakota kills Douglas and in the nick of time finds Aubrey who was buried underground and digs her out from a shallow grave.

Creep (I) (2004)

Another new fear. Stay out of the underground!

[10/10 · 8 February 2008]

"Mercilessly chilling. Terrifying." - Shivers.

"Taunt, frightening and gruesome" - Sunday Express.

These descriptions are spot on. "Creep" is indeed a new cult classic.

I think a lot of people were to harsh on this movie. It was extremely overlooked, as the time of it's release, other films such as "Wrong Turn" and "The Texas Chainsaw Massacre" were being released. A lot of people were getting slightly bored of the "Inbred, mutant freaks" lurking in the woods or in this case the London underground. Most people probably thought they knew what they were gonna get with this movie - big mistake. Creep is indeed a cut above the rest. It's very intriguing. A low budget horror with a C list cast, delivers better than a big Hollywood production and a cast of A List stars. Yes it's true.

Creep is more original than most "new" horrors these days. It brings a sense of fear to the situation. "Wrong Turn" made you not wanna go into the woods. "Creep" makes you not wanna go down to the underground. A while after watching the movie, I was in fact down in the London underground (late at night) and my friend said "Oh no, do you remember Creep?" - movies like this make a long lasting impression. They stick in your brain. The way classics do.

The premise of the film is very scary and intense. It's strange how a massive underground can be so claustrophobic. As soon as the horror hits, you are on the edge of your seat, praying this young woman finds some way out of the tube - before the terror begins. You feel for the character. This is what a true horror movie should do. You should be rooting for the victim. Not the monster. The leading actress Franka Potente, did an amazing job. Her acting was very real and unique. It came across like she was really terrified. The film wasn't over the top. Every scene and action had a great sense of realism - very tense.

The monster was by far one of the best aspects of the movie - and so it should be. The movie is called "Creep" after all, based on the creep, monster - whatever you prefer to call him. His movements and posture were spot on and you really thought the actor was this character.

All in all Creep is a great horror movie, and in my opinion, deserves to be a classic. It's new storyline and fresh approach to the horror genre is such a breath of fresh air. It truly stands out from your typical Hollywood (ever so generic) horror movie.

My advice. Put down the new Hollywood "blockbuster" and look for Creep. I can assure you. You will not be disappointed.

Black Christmas (1974)

Silence is the scariest!

[10/10 · 8 February 2008]

I have often wondered why there are so many bad horror movies these days. Movies that instead of focusing on suspense and real chills, just pour endless amounts of blood in your face, thinking this will do the trick, and hopefully become a cult classic. Film after film, more and more horror movies are becoming increasingly similar, and you can almost guess the whole entire plot of the movie, no more than 10 minutes into the film. Everything in horror these days is all about over the top special effects, numbingly loud thumping music, that is supposed to get you scared. Black Christmas (the original) is (IMO) one of the best and scariest horror movies ever made. Why? you ask. Let me tell you. There are so many reasons. First. In horror today, when someone (usually the pretty girl) is walking towards a door or a room (thinking someone will be there) - and they are. The film makers feel the need to spoil the moment with ridiculously loud music that is (intended) to get you all hyped up for the big surprise. When they don't realise that this spoils 99% of the scene. For instance, 10 minutes into the movie, one of the sorority girls "Claire" goes up stairs to her room, to pack some things, preparing for a trip. While entering the room she is greeted by the house cat "Claud". While packing, Claire hears a strange meow. At first she just ignores, but the meow gets more and more intense and chillingly creepy. She then notices that the meow is coming from the closet (not far from where she is standing) at the end of the room (and the closet door is open). She paces towards the closet (with a terrified stare) quickly realising that the meow is not coming from the house cat, asking "Who is that?" several times. The thing that makes this scene 'GOLD' is while walking to the closet and asking "Who is that?" there is no music! - just dead silence. This makes the scene and situation seem more real and 1000 times more scary. The viewers are at the edge of their seat, hanging on to pure silence while she walks further and further to the closet. This is far more terrifying than continuous loud music, that spoils the moment, because you know by the music when the killer is going to approach. That scene is horror at it's best and everyone should see the film for that scene alone. Secondly, the entrance of the movie is shocking. The camera is filmed like a documentary (like the camera is the stalker, walking nearer and nearer to the house) While spying on his victims he realises he is able to climb to the top of the house where he can enter the attic. The directer's captured this amazingly and it gave off that feeling, that raw, real, scare, that this really could happen to anyone. One of the standout scares and scenes that stick in your brain are the chillingly disturbing phone call scenes. The girls receive numerous phone calls from the same man, only there's a catch. It's not your typical Scream phone call were the killer asks "Are you alone?" and "What's your favourite scary movie?" he talks with himself, displaying what appears to be a severe split personality. The phone calls get more and more scary as the movie goes on. Especially near the end were the killer actually goes crazy portraying more than 4 different voices and characters - the horrific sound of his voice will haunt you after the movie is over (which I guess is great for the Creator, as all the best horror movies make long lasting impressions). The last thing I will say is there are a lot of people, reviewers, saying the end was disappointing because they still don't know who the killer is. Huh? lets get this straight. The killer isn't a person in the movie who is coming across nice, nor is he pretending to be a close friend - in fact he doesn't know any of the girls at all. He is merely a deranged, dangerous man who passed a sorority house and thought it would be fun to hide inside their attic and hack them off 1 by 1. I will not spoil the rest of the movie for those who haven't seen it. All I will say is if you want a great horror movie that when the credits role you will be afraid to walk upstairs, THIS IS THE MOVIE FOR YOU. You will also be staring at your attic door for about a week.

Soul Survivors (2001)

It's been 6 years since it's release, and I'm still confused!

[4/10 · 8 February 2008]

Like many, I was expecting an entirely different movie from what was shown on the previews for Soul Survivors - but sadly, got something else. It was released to theatres (shockingly) in 2002. It's now 2008 and I'm still kind of stumped.

The movie has enough ingredients to make it a slasher/horror hit, but it's just too confusing - and mind twisting for it's own good. Don't go thinking I'm dumb. I do get the story, it's just....the way it was portrayed was, well, horrible. The movie has too many flashbacks and hinted twists that you end up racking your brain, thinking what the hell is going on. Now, I love a movie were I have to use my head, but this just takes the cake. They quickly ditched the "stalker" idea more than a quarter into the movie and focused more on the lead female having flashbacks and thinking she was insane. It just went down the drain from there.

It's sad though as the cast are very talented. Plus the movie had a cool, horror vibe setting. So why the bad script? All I know is, when you see the poster for the movie + trailer, you think you're going to get a totally different movie.

All in all it was a disappointment. The only reason I sorta enjoyed it was because of the gorgeous Eliza Dushku. But for non Eliza fans, I would take a pass on this one!

Dead Silence (2007)

A refreshing new tale for the horror genre!

[10/10 · 8 February 2008]

I don't know about everyone else, but I started thinking the horror genre was getting seriously poor. It seemed every new horror was either about a little girl with black hair, or based on a Japanese film. Now don't get me wrong, I love "The Grudge", and "The Ring", but after those movies, others just duplicated them - and poorly I might add.

After watching this movie, I'm happy to see some 'Real' horror is still hitting the silver screen. Before watching "Dead Silence", I was a little worried and started getting second thoughts about purchasing. I thought to myself, okay, a horror movie based on a killer dummy - yeah right! That's gonna suck. Thankfully, I purchased the movie - and it didn't suck. Not at all.

Turns out "The Dummy" is chillingly creepy and unpleasant.

The opening scene of the movie was intensely creepy and scary, great way to start off. The film has a lot of great suspense. It's very eerie and scary to watch. With a great script, acting and superb ending, they couldn't go wrong with this new tale! Horror fans fear no more. This movie doesn't have a little girl with long black hair or Japanese curse! "Dead Silence" is well crafted and shines throughout! A film that stands out from the bunch! Two thumbs up!

Black Christmas (2006)

Was there really any point?

[2/10 · 7 February 2008]

So, I was very anxious to see this "remake" (yes, another) as I'm a massive fan of the original. The old Black Christmas was simply terrifying and is in my opinion one of the scariest, creepiest horror's ever made. I knew from the get go, whatever they came up with, was never going to beat it. But I didn't think it would be this bad. Really.

It's just so, monotonous. They didn't even try.

If you've seen the original, you'll know how horrifying those "phone calls" are. The remake tries to duplicate the same results and fails miserably. I mean they are laughable at best.

The movies biggest problem and flaw is the constant flashbacks of Billy's childhood. In the first movie, We didn't know if he was Billy. To be quite honest we didn't really care. It was so scary that a random man happened to walk by a sorority house, and the sick twisted person he is, thought it would be fun to hide up in their attic and kill them off one by one. This was terrifying - still is. But the remake tries to give us a reason why he's always shouting for Agnes, why he doesn't want anyone to know what they did, we don't need one. We don't need reasons.

This new version is so generic and boring. It takes anything from everything in a modern day horror film and isn't afraid to show it. The acting was bad, the effects were bad, man everything was bad.

GET THE ORIGINAL.

Dead Mary (2007 Video)

An UNBELIEVABLE train wreck of a movie

[1/10 · 7 February 2008]

If you're on this page it means you're probably sick of the big "Hollywood" releases and want a low budget but entertaining B horror movie. I understand, there are some great B horror's out there. But please know. THIS IS NOT ONE.

I kind of don't know where to start with Dead Mary. It's that bad.

I'm watching the movie as I type (this is the first time watching) - It's never a good sign when you're watching a movie and then you start doing other things. I just can't sit and pay attention any longer. What the hell is this movie? Why was it made? Why did these even D rate actors show up to film this tripe? ...So many questions. The first 35 minutes of the movie is the most bored I've ever been watching a movie (In my life). All the start consists of is all the "friends" talking about old times, where their life's are headed, blah, blah, blah - once half an hour passes, you're really confused. You will be asking yourself, I thought this was a horror movie - not a bad American soap.

Then the so called "horror" hits. Only by this time, (me, right now) you couldn't care less. You just want the credits to roll. The thing that really confused me is, the effects aren't all that bad. Not bad at all in fact, the movie just....sucks! It's as though there isn't even a script, it's like they're just making it up as they go along - ridiculous.

This IS NOT a horror. To be honest I don't even know what it is. All I know is, it's bad - very bad. DO NOT BUY OR RENT THIS MOVIE. Has anyone seen the movie Pulse? you know, they suck the life out of you. That's is exactly how you'll feel after watching this.

Stay Alive (2006)

Stay Alive offers originality and suspense!

[6/10 · 7 February 2008]

So, You're probably looking at all the bad reviews for Stay Alive and thinking, no thanks - i'll pass. Don't. This movie isn't bad. I mean, It's not going to win an Oscar, but what horror movie does?

Stay Alive was original straight from the bat. So no, it's not a remake. Nor is it based on a popular Japanese film or legend. Relieved? - probably. Now, don't get me wrong, "Stay Alive" isn't the best horror movie you will see, it probably won't even make your top 10 - but that doesn't mean it's not entertaining. Even though there are some obvious flaws and sometimes very annoying ones (that were stupidly missed by the producers), If you don't take the movie seriously, you will like it.

Others will say the story is similar to the movie "The Ring" - and yes, they are right. Only this time instead of it being a videotape, it's a video game. You play the game. You die in the game. You die in real life. Simple really.

The plot at times seemed weak and way too easy. There weren't any "Oh no" or "What?" moments. No twists. At one point I think I said "BLAH". I could almost kind of guess the ending my first time watching. It's sad though, as the movie does have some great tense scenes. But when you weigh it out, there are more bad than there are good.

Now, my biggest problem with the movie is the female lead, "Samaire Armstrong". This was a shock to me because I adore Samaire as Anna in the hit TV series "The O.C". But after watching the movie, it made me realise Samaire is in no way lead female material - not even close. Her character is overshadowed by the talented (might I say stunningly gorgeous) One Tree Hill actress "Sophia Bush" as October. Sophia can make the stretch from cute teen drama actress, to punk/goth girl, and she shows a whole new side of her acting here. Samaire on the other hand looks very..dare I say bored?. I know it sounds stupid but If you just watch her performance throughout the movie - it's very below average. Some scenes she looks very uncomfortable, and her posture is awful - very wooden. It showed me her acting range is very limited. It appears Samaire can only play "cute girl" from The O.C., not female survivor in a horror. Another problem I had was, a lot of scenes seemed rushed, like they only did 2 takes. During the movie, sometimes I felt as though I was watching a High School Drama play - the acting was really off at times, like they couldn't even be bothered trying. This is mostly to the male lead "Hutch". Most of the other actors did a good job though.

On a more positive note, If you put Samaire's acting aside. Stay Alive is a very entertaining horror flick. With good suspense, an outside the box plot and a creepy new horror villain - you can't go wrong.

So, turn the lights out, curl on the sofa and prepare to be "slightly scared" for an hour and a half.

One Missed Call (2008)

If only It had been one of the first.

[6/10 · 7 February 2008]

One Missed Call does not deserve a 2.8 rating, - it just doesn't. I think most people had an opinion of this movie before they even seen it. Most likely because it was simply "another Japanese remake", but that's unfair. If One Missed Call had been released before, lets say "The Ring" - the movie would have had a higher rating - and better reviews. But because we have had "The Ring", "The Ring 2 ", "The Grudge", "The Grudge 2", "Pulse", etc.. (to name a few) people think they know what the're already gonna get from the film. I mean, I'm not gonna lie and say One Missed Call is really a lot different from those movies - cause it's not. But that doesn't mean to say it's not good or entertaining. I think If you get passed the whole Japanese thing - you will enjoy the movie for sure.

The thing I like about these certain movies is, there is a lot of great suspense. There's no heads, legs, arms flying everywhere - it's better than that. These so called Hollywood "creators" now think a horror film can only be a horror if there is blood & guts splattered everywhere. That's not true. A great horror has great suspense, and One Missed Call delivers just that.

Wrong Turn 2: Dead End (2007 Video)

You know what they say, second times the slump!

[1/10 · 30 January 2008]

Back in 2003, I picked up the first Wrong Turn - initially because the gorgeous Eliza Dushku, but now look at it as one of the best horror movies of it's genre. The first movie was great from start to finish. Everything from the look, plot, acting, script etc.. was 110%. The movie relied on pure suspense, instead of pouring endless amounts of blood in your face - Wrong Turn 2: Dead End, has pretty much the opposite, on all of the above.

This movie could have been a great sequel, but instead, it comes off cheap, second rate and merely lack luster to it's first. This is probably due to the fact that no person(s) from the first movie were involved with the project - and I can understand why.

The movie starts off well, with a great opening - possibly better than the first opening, but after 15 minutes passed I quickly realised It wasn't going to be anything on the original. The story of a reality show in the woods, scary house etc.. has been done to death (House on Haunted Hill, Halloween Resurrection) so the plot seemed dull from the start. The film has no suspense and just lays it all out on the table, and by that I mean anything that's anything (body part wise). There is so much gore that it gets slightly ridiculous. The first movie was well crafted and just gave enough gore to scare you, the sequel however just flows a blood bath, which came off really tacky and desperate. The acting was, okay. There were a couple of actors I was surprised to see on here. Especially Erica Leerhsen. She starred in the 2003 remake of "The Texas Chainsaw Massacre" and the movie did extremely well. I mean, It was a remake, and most Hollywood remakes get thrashed by critics, but the film actually received great reviews. So she was obviously type casted for this role. Why she wanted to be involved in this project - I don't know. Maybe she thought she was gonna be the next "Scream Queen", after this I doubt it. Possibly a second rate B-horror actor. I can see that happening for sure.

There were many scenes in the movie that just shouldn't have been included. One being the inbred brother and sister having sex in the woods. There was no need to include this in the movie. When we hear a family is inbred-incest, we know what that means. We certainly don't have to see it happening full swing. The scene is horrific and disgusting. Another downfall is the special effects make-up on the monsters. It was a big disappointment and they resembled nothing like the original mountain men. In the first film you only caught glimpses of the mad men, that made it even more scarier. The "freaks" in Dead End however are very in your face and the more screen close ups you get, the more the make-up looks obviously fake and badly done. Very B movie like.

Are we surprised this movie didn't see theatrical release? NO.

All in all, the movie was below average. When are film makers going to learn, having so much gore does not do any justice to the movie itself. Especially when half the gore doesn't even look semi-real.

If you are a fan of the first movie, don't expect the same results with Wrong Turn 2: Dead End. But if you absolutely must see this movie then at least you were warned.

Captivity (2007)

Cuthberts acting falls short in this horrendous "horror" movie!

[2/10 · 29 January 2008]

Like most, I read the unbelievably bad reviews for this movie, but told myself It wouldn't be that bad - surely, right? Wrong. Turns out, this time, I should have just listened to the critics (something I never do), but this is an exception - because they were right. 100% spot on.

When the credits rolled, I was slightly baffled as to why this movie was made in the first place. I have never watched a movie that serves no purpose whatsoever and lacks everything from anything in a film. The direction of the movie was horrible and the bad dialogue was ridiculous at times.

I will admit, I have been a fan of Elisha ever since I caught her in teen comedy "The Girl Next Door". I thought she had a great fresh face and real acting abilities - which she proved later on becoming a regular on the hit sci-fi show "24". But after watching this movie, I'm really shocked at her performance. It's almost like it's her first movie. Or first acting role ever! There are so many flaws to this movie that it would be impossible to name them all, but I will point out the big dud moments that made me hate this so called "Horror".

The opening was pretty predictable and almost boring - not a good start! The film so desperately tries to be like the Saw, Hostel movies, that you notice it almost 3 minutes into the movie. Although the deaths were sorta inventive, it's nothing we haven't seen before. It brings nothing new to the table. It's simply just "another one of those movies", one of the worst takes on the torture-porn, gore franchise that American directors seem to be obsessed with today. I mean, If you've seen Saw - you've seen them all. Not one of these "movies" stands out from the rest, they all mesh into one horrible gore fest of a movie. Now, the actual film. There is a scene in the movie that was acted out very badly and had to be mentioned. The scene features only Elisha herself (no dialogue) yet it's pitiful. Seeing as how her character is a top fashion model, she is invited to a charity wine mixer (or something like that) and like any celebrates duty, it's crucial she goes. Elisha orders her drink and sits alone. The bar tender fixes her drink and leaves it on the bar while he fixes some more. Someone (unknown) spikes her drink. The bar tender then gives Elisha her cocktail. The problem with this scene is, as soon as Elisha takes 1 sip, she starts acting all weird (no longer than 3 seconds after her first taste). Now we all know the effects of a drugged drink do not happen that quickly. It was almost like watching a 5th grader in Drama class acting out a scene - but clearly doing it wrong. It looked half-hearted and actually appeared as though Elisha was tired that day and just couldn't be bothered acting. It's such a clumsy mistake and stupidly left unfixed. It really angered me and it came across very sloppy. This then follows a very dazed Elisha, stumbling to the bathroom - terribly I might add.

She then wakes up in almost cell like room, were a man is toying with her. Playing sick deranged games, while she fights for her life. She is held captive, all alone (or so she thinks), in a strange house. The "killer" is not in sight, but he makes sure she knows he's watching. The first few scenes are pretty intense and creepy, - but when they use the same idea/scenes over and over again, it gets very boring, very quickly. She soon discovers another person is being held against their will. A man. They quickly manage to gain physical contact with one another and try escape this nightmare and take out the bad guy.

"Apparently" during all this hell, she falls in love with him........huh?? I know, confused? Me to. You don't fall in love with someone you have known for less than 24 hours! Especially the situation these two are in. When a mad man holds you captive and is trying to kill you, the last thing you will be thinking about is love, or attraction for that matter. All you wanna do is get out of there. Ridiculous plot. This soon follows a sex scene, which comes off incredibly cheap and tacky. It's so obvious it was only thrown in for the simple reason of having a sex scene. By this point I had lost all hope in the movie. The direction was becoming catastrophic.

I will not give away the ending, but all in all the movie sucks! BIG TIME! This coming from a big Elisha fan. I'm now wondering if Elisha is actually a strong, capable actor at all. Or was the movie so bad that even she couldn't save it. I'm not exactly sure yet. All I know is, it was a poor excuse for a horror movie. In fact, I've seen straight to DVD releases, B-movies, D movies even, that look like Oscar winners compared to this.

While I'm not a fan of the Saw, Hostel movies. I would take them over this any day.

The film is called Captivity. Someone would have to hold me captive to sit through this ridiculous tripe all over again.

YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!