EllieStar Reviews

Austin Powers in Goldmember (2002)

Groovy, baby!

[3 August 2002]

I thought that this film was good. Normally, slap-stick humour applied in films as a way of replacing a good story-line does not remotely engage, interest, or make me laugh in any shape or form. I dislike films such as There's Something About Mary and Scary Movie.

I haven't as yet seen Austin Powers: The spy who shagged me, so I cannot comment on the trilogy as a whole, but from what I've seen, it is very funny. Like the aforementioned films, there is no original story-line, but the humour is definitely more intelligent, and it is used to complement, rather than compensate for, the story-line. As opposed to the take-offs in Scary Movie, the references to other films (such as Silence of the Lambs and The Italian Job) were subtle, which meant that they were invariably more funny. And a lot of the humour was genuinely hilarious, such as the exchanges between Scott and Dr Evil.

Do not go into the cinema expecting a striking screen-play; enjoy it for the slick comedy that it is!

Minority Report (2002)

A surprisingly excellent film!!

[10/10 · 12 July 2002]

When I first heard about this film, it did not particularly appeal to me; I am not a huge of either Tom Cruise or the Sci-Fi/Action genre. However, there was something which made me go and see it, and thank god I did!! This is going to remain in my top ten films ever list!! Okay, so there were a few minor glitches in which belief had to be momentarily dispelled i.e the whole Lara getting into the department using John's eyeball thing (but hey, maybe with all of the huge attention of having the Chief of the department imprisoned, the withdrawing of the access was maybe overlooked). It was extremely suspenseful, emotive, had an incredibly well written script, excellent performances and cinematography. I thought that the use of the futuristic technology was extremely well thought out. It was futuristic enough to show that it was 2054, (and I loved the cars and motorways!!) yet familiar enough to be recognisable as this planet and Washington DC in the near future, setting the familiar landmarks of DC against a futuristic backdrop. My only criticism was the touches of humour in it...I know that Spielberg likes to mix a variety of genres into his films, but I felt that this was unneccesary, and made a bit of a mockery of those aspects. It gave those parts of the film a lighthearted feel which undermined the actual plot. But overall, a really really good film and I cannot wait to own it on DVD!!

Scary Movie (2000)

Extremely tedious, overrated, pointless piece of crap.

[3/10 · 17 April 2002]

Just what is the point of this film?

Okay, it is supposedly a satire of various modern horror films. Granted, there was therefore no necessity for it to be in any way original.

However, isn't a satire meant to be funny?

This was a mismatched sequence of take-off scenes from films such as "Scream" and "I know What You Did Last Summer", but there was no central plot connecting them, and no humour or intelligence in them whatsoever, therefore rendering the whole concept completely pointless.

DO NOT WASTE YOUR LIFE WATCHING THIS EXTREMELY POOR SUBSTITUTE FOR A FILM. I REALLY DO WONDER HOW THIS GOT THE FUNDING AND THE EXPOSURE IT RECEIVED, CONSIDERING THAT EVEN A HIGH SCHOOL MEDIA STUDIES CLASS COULD DO BETTER.

EVEN WATCHING THE FILMS IT IS SUPPOSEDLY A SATIRE OF FOR THE 100TH TIME WOULD MAKE MORE ORIGINAL AND MORE BEARABLE VIEWING.

The Faculty (1998)

A good horror, but also warm and fuzzy. You will have to watch it to fully comprehend that!

[8/10 · 17 April 2002]

*POSSIBLE SPOILER*

This is one of those films which you can initially watch twenty times in as many days, and then never see again for a year.

It would never have had Oscar-winning potential, but it is an extremely enjoyable experience nonetheless. It has an intelligent, and quite scary, plot, (albeit unoriginal) a witty script, aesthetically pleasing actors, (who can also ACT) and a well-concluded ending, complete with shock. (It actually surprised me, and I am usually quite perceptive when it comes to whodunnits.)

It also has a warm, fuzzy feel to it, as despite being a horror/sci-fi, it has a happy ending, and reminds me of the time of year when I initially saw it. (Warm summer evening) Had I viewed it on a, let's say, depressing winter's afternoon, I may rate this film entirely differently.

Hollyoaks (1995– )

Embarrassingly amateurish acting

[17 April 2002]

Oh my god, can the acting seriously get much worse?!

I have to say that the acting has never reached Oscar-winning heights, but at the present moment it is so positively dire, that it is extremely laughable.

How the directors can possibly 'direct' these so-called actors, or pieces of wood as they have more in common with, with a straight face is unbelievable. How they can put them on air without seriously worrying about their credibility status as professional directors is beyond me. Because let's face it, these actors are so bad, that it has to reflect on the directors.

Okay, taking a breather from my rant, I have to say that NOT ALL of the Hollyoaks cast fits into the above mould. Most of the longer-serving cast members are perfectly adequate as soap actors. They will never be the recipient of a major award for outstanding acting achievement, but perfectly adequately fit the requirements for British soaps. Even some of the newer cast members, such as the Hunter family for example, can hold their own in this department.

But a lot of the influx of new members were so obviously chosen for either their looks or their connections, as the acting is so amateurish, it even lowers the (already rock bottom) standards of some British soaps.

"Hollyoaks" is marketed as an accurate portrayal of British teen life, but the acting and production is so embarrassingly awful that to compare it up against an American contemporary, for example, "Dawson's Creek", would bring shame on to the entire British nation. "Dawson's Creek" may be classed by some as hideously pretentious, but at least it can stand proud in the acting stakes.

Pleasantville (1998)

Very original idea, shame about the ending

[7/10 · 16 April 2002]

Hmm, this is one of those films which starts out incredibly well, is an incredibly original idea, but after about halfway through, starts to go a bit downhill, eventually reaching a total anti-climax. In that respect, it is not dissimilar to "Final Destination" or "Cube".

I'm not saying that it is not a good film. It is. But let's just say that the ending left a little to be desired.

It is a very very original idea...it starts off so promising. The acting is faultless, the transition to black and white is very clever, the script is very witty. I think that where it goes wrong is that it tries just a little too hard to be intelligent. But it doesn't need to...that comes across naturally, and instead of being able to sit back and enjoy it as the delightful gem that it is, you spend too long trying to analyse the confusing subtle undertones.

And whilst it endeavours to prove itself as a serious piece of cinematography, it forgets small, but vital plot details, which, for a viewer who must have every last detail tied up and successfully concluded, proves incredibly frustrating viewing.

Legally Blonde (2001)

Candy Floss

[4/10 · 15 April 2002]

This film made so little impression on me that I can barely remember a plot summary, never mind how it concludes.

That, I can safely say, sums up this film. It left me emotionally detached, and did not even have the slightest poignancy or touching moment to it whatsoever.

"But so what?", I hear you say, "Some films are not marketed for their Oscar-winning capacity, some are merely feel-good fun."

I have no problem with feel-good fun.I enjoy films such as "Clueless", "Never Been Kissed", "She's All That", films with that 'Feel-good' factor. But to have feel-good fun, you would need to engage the viewer, make them share the emotions of the characters. But this did not. This was substanceless, pure tripe.

The Others (2001)

Pant-wettingly scary!!

[9/10 · 15 April 2002]

I am a wuss, I am the first person to admit it. The Supernatural terrifies me. I even have to watch "Buffy" from behind a cushion. However, I was lulled into a false sense of security by the fact that this film was only rated a 12.

'Huh', I thought, 'How scary can this film be?' Ever use the expression "Famous last words"? Well, mine will go down in infamy.

"The Others" certainly gives proof to the fact that a film does not have to contain sharp weapons of any description, heavy breathing, or copious amounts of blood to scare the wits out of a person. This film definitely played on your subconscious, rather than conscious state of mind. But it was more than that...after all "The Blair Witch Project" was said to do the same, and to compare the two would not be dissimilar to a comparison made between double oscar winning Tom Hanks, and Tom "Well, I played the back-end of a horse in my high school pantomime" Joe Public. I can safely say that alongside "Scary Movie", "The Blair Witch Project" has got to be one of the most overrated, tedious pile of crap I have ever had to waste 2 hours of my life watching.

"The Others" is in an entirely different class. Atmospheric, tense, and very very scary. One of only two films I have embarrassed myself by screaming at in the cinema, (The other is "What Lies Beneath", by the way) the twist at the end even surpasses the climax of "The Sixth Sense".

American Beauty (1999)

Distinctly average

[1/10 · 15 April 2002]

Having won numerous Oscars and received rave reviews, I bought this film anticipating to be blown away by the sheer brilliance of it.

And yes, whilst there were touching moments, I could not tear my mind away from the question "How can this pretentious pap be the product of a BRITISH director?" long enough to focus on them.

There was no doubt that there was intelligence behind it, but rather than this being allowed to filter through naturally, it felt superfluously constructed. This epitomised the entire film; it felt fake, and as if it was trying to appeal to the ideology of what makes a good film, disregarding the fact that a good film cannot be manufactured.

Never Been Kissed (1999)

Fluffy, Funny, Feel-good

[7/10 · 15 April 2002]

*POSSIBLE SPOILER*

I have to admit that I am extremely biased when it comes to this film. I happen to think that Micheal Vartan is an extremely talented (okay, extremely sexy) actor, and his portrayal of Mr.Coulson is filled with sensitivity, empathy and understanding. By no means could this possibly fulfil anyone's notion of an excellent film. The plot is thin, the script cliched, and the acting (at times) stretched. However, forgetting all of the above, it is an extremely witty, poignant, easily relatable, confidence-boosting, feel-good film.

Drew Barrymore and Micheal Vartan share an incredible on-screen chemistry and their kiss at the end is one of the cutest.