mdaizovi Reviews

Insidious (I) (2010)

I love horror, even bad horror. I don't get it

[1/10 · 5 June 2024]

Why do people love this movie? It's not bad enough to be funny or a guilty pleasure, not good enough to be earnestly enjoyable. I mean I love horror, even bad horror, and I see nothing to like here. Just cheap jump scares that aren't even really creepy. The scary costumes look like the costume you put together on Halloween when you forgot it was Halloween and just looked around your house. The writer has written good movies, the director has directed good movies, actors have acted in good movies... why is this one so nothing? And this is like a six movie franchise? I expected the first or second to be okay based on that but it's really just a bunch of nothing. Did they pay a bunch of bots to write reviews?

Spaceman (I) (2024)

Surprising and sweet

[10/10 · 2 March 2024]

I used to hate Adam Sandler but I guess now that he's too old for the kind of humor he used to do he's actually choosing good movies? I had no idea what I was getting into here, the trailer kinda reminded me of the book Hail Mary, so I decided to go for it. I was shocked by how good this movie was, especially considering the current rating is 5 point something! It's strange and beautiful and sweet. It reminded me a little of interstellar, except very Czech. Unfortunately now that I'm giving it such a high score your expectations will be much higher than mine. But nonetheless, I'd urge you to give it a shot.

She Came to Me (2023)

What a strange, sweet movie

[10/10 · 23 February 2024]

In truth maybe it's more like an eight not a ten, but I have to compensate for the crime of it being rated only a six. It deserves so much more than that!

I love this movie because the characters are strange, and yes okay maybe exaggerated as movies tend to be, but actually authentic at the heart of it. Each of them are laugh out loud absurd, but also somehow remind me of someone I know in various ways. This movie captures how sweet it is to be young and in love. It captures how it feels to think that part of your life is over, and be wrong. And it does it in such a strange and original way. I'm sorry I just love it, start to finish.

The Haunting of Hill House (2018)

Starts slow, strong finish

[7/10 · 24 October 2023]

The first few episodes were a little over-the-top, in my opinion. I mostly continued because the ratings are so high and I wanted something to play in the background. A few of the lines, like every time they refer to the house as "not sane" (or deal with the issue of mental health at all, those lines are all a little cringe worthy), I had a massive eye roll. But the last few episodes are genuinely touching. What starts as a jump scare popcorn horror show ends up touching on themes of love, resilience, grief, vulnerability, courage. I don't know if it's the most amazing show ever, like some ratings say, but I'd say it's better than I expected and worth some time.

Bad Vegan: Fame. Fraud. Fugitives. (2022)

Is every woman who ever dated a liar going to get a miniseries now?

[1/10 · 27 June 2023]

This is a lot like the Tinder Swindler, with different details. A lot like two of my ex boyfriends, but with more money involved, of course. It sounds a lot like guys some of my friends have dated. Are we all going to get our own mini series now? This is not a story worth telling. Not a series worth watching. Unless you miss your friends and just want to feel like you're gossiping about mundane liars for a few hours. This guy presents her with unbelievable stories and for some reason she believes them. She is always giving him money. I don't know what to say. This was a very long, very stupid story.

Home Movie: The Princess Bride (2020)

If you love the original you'll love this

[10/10 · 15 April 2023]

It should go without saying this movie is for people who just absolutely love the original Princess Bride. If you love this movie, seeing it preposterously re enacted by various actors in their homes with ridiculous props is hilarious and endearing. If not: it won't even make any sense. I mean each main character from the movie is played by multiple people of multiple genders and races. Absolutely impossible to follow unless this is the 100th time you've seen this movie.

I could not wait to see my favorite scenes, every single one cracked me up. Bless whoever thought of doing this, and everyone who participated.

Tetris (2023)

I cannot believe how good this movie is

[10/10 · 6 April 2023]

When my husband said he wanted to watch the Tetris movie I made fun of him because it sounded like the stupidest most boring movie I had ever heard of. I was so unbelievably wrong. I was on the edge of my seat. No, I'm not being sarcastic, it's really just an amazing movie. Interesting story that's actually pretty much true (I bet the car chase was exaggerated), good acting, good writing, playful. Good soundtrack. This is honestly the best movie I've seen in months, maybe all year. And I laughed at the idea of watching it! Well the movie is full of people underestimating Tetris, I guess I'm in good company. Anyway: watch it!

Day Shift (2022)

As serious as you'd expect a Snoop Dogg vampire movie to be

[8/10 · 12 March 2023]

Why such a low score this movie is super fun! I mean come on it's a LA vampire movie it's not going to teach you how to learn, laugh, love. It will not change your life. But it is seriously funny, it has car chases, absolutely preposterous fight choreography... I mean if you come here and are disappointed I don't know what you could possibly be expecting. Yes it's stupid but in all the fun ways, not stupid in an annoying cringe way like so many other camp horror films.

Also I'd really like to know if these fight scenes were CGI or if the vampires are circus contortionists because some of these moves are nuts.

Barbarian (2022)

Obviously written by a man

[6/10 · 8 March 2023]

Yes I know you suspend belief for horror movies of course but this had so many implausible aspects in the "real life" part it was distracting.

1) Two people on their own rent the entire house for just themselves? Weird, why wouldn't they just get an apartment? Especially for a quick job interview, not vacation.

2) There's a main female character with a rented car and someone else in her rental. Yes it's raining, fine, but if she has a car, no way in hell would she get in the house with a strange man in it, she'd go in her car.

3) Same thing when the guy on the street is running after her yelling. She gets out of her car to fumble with the lock and get in the house? Hell no, she'd get back in the car and drive away. At this point I was like, "this was written by a man who has no idea how it feels to be afraid of strangers. " Were there no women working on this film, or did no one listen to them? I'll forgive any number of dumb horror movie tropes because that's the genre, of course, but that was just implausible and annoying.

The rest was medium-level popcorn horror. Delivers what it promises.

The Witches (2020)

Loved the first one, love this one too.

[10/10 · 20 August 2022]

It's pretty much the same movie, with an updated cast and CGI. I don't get where this hate is coming from. I loved the original as a kid, and now I'm loving this one. Hathaway is super creepy. Chill the f out, folx.