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Reviews
Spider-Man: Lotus (2023)
The Most Boring Superhero Film Ever
I tried to go into this with a fresh open mind. I tried not to think about the BTS racism and him underpaying vfx artists or anything like that.
That being said, the movie still sucks
The entire first hour of the movie consists of Peter, Harry and MJ crying over the death of Gwen. It got to points (plural) where it was genuinely "Oh my God, we get it, SHE'S DEAD!!!!!!!" It's not even as if you have to establish this for a general audience because only fans will be watching the movie. The whole point of Spider-Man Blue, the book they're adapting, is Peter looking back on the good times with Gwen, to show a message of moving on and focusing on the good memories and not the bad. There is only one scene like that in this movie, which features a total and utter lack of chemistry between Peter and Gwen. The rest of the scenes that take place before Gwen's death are moody flashbacks in black and white or really awful fights between Peter and Norman. The rest of this movie is Peter and Tim, the only thing stopping this from being a 1/10, and Harry crying over the death of his abusive dad. Look, I don't mind sad movies but when you go into a Spider-Man movie, I think you should be expecting at least a little bit of action to contrast with the drama.
However the swinging is quite nice, so there's that, I guess.
But for a movie that cost $125,000 to make, it should be nowhere near this bad.
Thomas The Tank Engine: Shed 17 (2015)
A strange take on why the engines have faces
I have grown up watching Thomas and Friends since a very young age. I watched half of this film when I was 7 up until the part when (spoilers) character, Wilhelm Gotze commits suicide. I was traumatised and didn't watch it all until my friend at school found it and recommended it to me. I watched the whole thing and by god is it beautiful. Sure, it's gory and disturbing but that's the point. I was really astounded by the film when one of my favourite characters, Gordon explodes into a fiery ball of flames. The special effects in the film are astounding and the animation compliments it even more. Some models are inaccurate and don't look fully correct to the actual model, which still doesn't detract from the masterpiece that is this film. Paul did a brilliant job making this and has made a very resounding impact not just on the franchise but on the adult fandom as a whole.