billpeter Reviews

Compliance (2012)

I don't believe that some people are really this stupid

[1/10 · 13 July 2018]

I found this film so annoying that I stopped watching TV and went and read a book while listening to music. I wanted to shout at the TV "'phone a lawyer you idiots. I can't believe that it is based on a true story.

Andron (2015)

I have a theory....

[2/10 · 22 April 2018]

While preparing for the London Olympics, someone came across a large derelict warehouse, and thought that it would make a good film set. A few actors with a few days to spare were rounded up, given an overview of the plot and told to "get improvising". The two stars are for the attractive women in the cast, including one of my favourites; Michelle Ryan.

Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice (2016)

And I thought that it was me....

[3/10 · 11 February 2017]

I bought this film to watch with my 9-year-old twin sons, but my born-again wife banned it as being not "age appropriate". I decided to watch it myself anyway as I thought that Sucker Punch was fun with attractive young ladies and good music. Seeing the cast, including Amy Adams, whom I like, plus Wonderwoman, who I always associate with Jaime Murray in Hustle. How wrong I was.

Firstly the "unofficial" DVD (bought in Malaysia) was over three hours long, and that is VERY long. I like long films, with the Director's Cut of Once Upon a Time in America being one of my favourite films.

Secondly, and importantly, the film is an impenetrable mess. I suffered a stroke in 2002, and occasionally get confused with things, so I thought that it might be me, but after reading other reviews, there must either be a lot of stroke-victim reviewers or it is a (unintentionally) surreal shambles.

Amy Adams was, of course, petite and lovely and even appeared naked in a bath - the tease. Elsewhere she was just a wee damsel-in-distress.

Wonderwoman did nothing, and even if she had, the wrong actress was cast. Shannon Elizabeth or Megan Fox would have been better.

Sometimes bad films are better the second time, so I may read the plot on Wikipedia and try again, but will be wary of Zack in the future.

BTW, I forgot the worst character and actor; Lex Luthor and Jesse Eisenberg, who seemed to be doing an unsuccessful audition for The Joker.

Everyone involved should be ashamed of themselves.

Be afraid, be very afraid.

The X-Files: Mulder & Scully Meet the Were-Monster (2016) Season 10, Episode 3

Should have been a radio show

[1/10 · 2 March 2016]

Other reviewers have commented on the lack of energy from Mulder and Sculley. I'm not really surprised given the quality - or lack of it - of the material, but their performances were so flat that could have been 'phoned in. Radio would be a far more appropriate medium for this trash. BTW, the whole season reminds me of some rock/pop groups who come out of retirement for a fast buck, but only ruin their reputations in doing so. Sad, very sad. At least Sculley, sorry Gillian, is doing some great work in the UK. Bleak House is a fine example. I'd rather watch that again than have my fond memories of M&S destroyed. Sorry only nine lines so far, so hopefully this will allow me to have followed "orders".

The Transporter Refueled (2015)

As much a waste of time as a $5 quartz Rolex.

[1/10 · 18 December 2015]

When so much effort is put into trying to stop replica goods when appalling replica films are foisted onto the public. At least some skill and effort is put into some replica Swiss watches , however there's no evidence of either skill or real effort in this "replica", which is in name only. Why on earth are they allowed to use the title "Transporter"? There's a box at the top for spoiler warnings. I'm not sure why they bother to have it for this rubbish as to have a spoiler a plot is needed, and there doesn't seem to be one in evidence here. A WASTE OF TIME. There's a box at the top for spoiler warnings. I'm not sure why they bother to have it for this rubbish as to have a spoiler a plot is needed, and there doesn't seem to be one in evidence here. A WASTE OF TIME. There's a box at the top for spoiler warnings. I'm not sure why they bother to have it for this rubbish as to have a spoiler a plot is needed, and there doesn't seem to be one in evidence here. A WASTE OF TIME. There's a box at the top for spoiler warnings. I'm not sure why they bother to have it for this rubbish as to have a spoiler a plot is needed, and there doesn't seem to be one in evidence here. A WASTE OF TIME.

The Tourist (I) (2010)

A waste of some good actors

[2/10 · 30 December 2010]

With a cast including Angelina Jolie and Johnny Depp how can you go wrong? Watch this film and you'll see. They should have cast Rowan Atkinson in the Johnny Depp role and the "Carry on crowd" in the roles played by the likes of Paul Bethany, Rufus Sewell, Timothy Dalton, Steven Berkoff, and co. It could have been called "Carry on to Venice" With a cast including Angelina Jolie and Johnny Depp how can you go wrong? Watch this film and you'll see. They should have cast Rowan Atkinson in the Johnny Depp role and the "Carry on crowd" in the roles played by the likes of Paul Bethany, Rufus Sewell, Timothy Dalton, Steven Berkoff, and co. It could have been called "Carry on to Venice" With a cast including Angelina Jolie and Johnny Depp how can you go wrong? Watch this film and you'll see. They should have cast Rowan Atkinson in the Johnny Depp role and the "Carry on crowd" in the roles played by the likes of Paul Bethany, Rufus Sewell, Timothy Dalton, Steven Berkoff, and co. It could have been called "Carry on to Venice"

Inception (2010)

Preposterous, utterly preposterous, but................

[10/10 · 13 November 2010]

Inception is also very inventive, and utterly riveting. The thought of someone else taking control of one's dreams is a frightening prospect, but is brilliantly presented in this film. It gets a bit complicated when the different "levels" are introduced, but this leads to some Oscar-potential editing. In fact, this film should win several Oscars; best picture, best director, best supporting actor (Ellen Page), as well as the editing one. I can hardly wait to watch the film again. I've been a fan of Christopher Nolan since Memento, but with this film, he was really excelled himself. I just wonder what he'll think of next. One more line for good luck.

Insomnia (2002)

A great advert or Alaskan scenery, but a poor "whodunnit"

[2/10 · 31 May 2010]

I have enjoyed the Christopher Nolan films that I have watched, but this was a disappointment. The rugged Alaskan scenery is beautiful, and made me want to visit, but, as a crime film, it was a non-starter. The cast is good, but wasted; Al Pacino in both senses of the word, hence the title. Most people going to see a film will know the big name stars who appear in it. When one of them doesn't appear at all in the first half of the film, it's pretty clear what his role in the film is. When he does appear, the obvious is only confirmed, and so there's no "tension" left to resolve, and no important questions left unanswered, so I, and I suspect many watchers lost, or would lose interest. It's a shame because Pacino, Hilary Swank, Maura Tierney, plus the "half-time" star give good, if not great, performances. Maura Tierney's abilities were wasted, IMHO, with far too little screen time.

I can't really recommend this film.

Cirque du Freak: The Vampire's Assistant (2009)

The lamest vampire film I've ever seen

[1/10 · 10 March 2010]

I was a teenager in the 60s, so grew up with the Hammer films. Friends and I used to go and see them every Sunday evening. The vampire ones were sexy without being porn. Francis Ford Coppolla realised that, and his maligned Bram Stoker's Dracula was sexy. Even Dead and Loving It was a bit sexy, with the lovely Lysette Anthony. However, this film is just lame, and a waste of a good cast. Why John C. Reilly, Willem Dafoe, Salma Hayek, and Ray Stevenson signed up for it beggars belief. With Salma and Jane Krakowski it could have been sexy, but not with Salma wearing a beard. There is some talk on the "board" about a sequel. I hope not, because the money could be far better spent elsewhere.

From Paris with Love (2010)

Rubbish. Complete and utter rubbish

[1/10 · 6 March 2010]

I'm a fan of "all-action" films like the Die Hard and Bourne series, plus the Daniel Craig Bond films. However, this rubbish gives the term "all-action" a bad name. Any attempts a humour are, at best, lame, like the quote " you're going down. You're so going down". A line used by John Travolta about Orson Welles, while watching "A Touch of Evil" in "Get Shorty". A good cast; John Travolta, Penelope Cruz, and the bloke from The Tudors is wasted, apart from the bloke from The Tudors, who appears to be not with it at all, and out of his depth. Maybe he realised how bad this travesty would turn out. Avoid like the plague. Please allow British English spelling, and get rid of the minimum of ten lines.

Cold Souls (2009)

A bleak film

[7/10 · 4 March 2010]

Yes, it is a comedy, but not just a black one, but a very bleak one. Bleak, like a bleak landscape, with very few features. The funny parts are few and far between. Bleak, also as in very dark. The situation that Paul Giamatti finds himself is is more dramatic than comedic, although there are some funny scenes. Funny in the way "Being John Malkovitch" was funny, but without that actor's egotism. In fact, Paul Giamatti's persona and performance are the opposite of egotistical. This really is Paul Giamatti's film, with the other actors, including the excellent David Strathairn and Emma Watson, merely foils. There is also an actress who is the "spitting image" of Scarlett Johansen. I thought that it was Scarlet playing an uncredited role - like Bette Midler in Get Shorty.

The War Game (1966)

A REALLY SCARY MOVIE (spoiler included)

[10/10 · 28 December 2009]

I saw this film, as a teenager, at my Grammar School Film Club. It is about the build up to, and the effects of, a nuclear war. The only details that I can remember, and which scared me are;

1. In the event of a nuclear attack on Briain there were (are only four aircraft on full-time standby by to protect the whole country.

2. In the film it is the West (the good guys) who make the first nuclear strike.

I honestly don't know whether I'd want to watch it again - now over four decades later. Why does IMDb insst on a minimum of ten lines? I could ramble on, and probably will, but it will add nothing to what I've already written. Such people are bad enough in the Civil Service. Why should we have to put up with them here?

A Profile of 'Black Narcissus' (2000)

its single reason for existence is the images (from another review)

[10/10 · 9 September 2009]

I think you'll find that it isn't. It's an almost perfect portrayal of the effects of narcissism. The David Farrah character clearly takes great delight in withholding his "charms" from Deborah Kerr's character and Sister Ruth. Most, or many, male narcissists treat women sadistically by withholding their "favours" - affection and/or sex. There are articles that I'd like to link to, but IMDb stops this by censoring links as words that are "too long". However, with a bit of research I hope that you will agree with me. I agreed with you until I was pointed in the correct direction. It makes The Black Narcissus a far more interesting and rewarding film.

Black Narcissus (1947)

the film's title refers to a perfume that he has imported from England.

[10/10 · 8 September 2009]

The "summary above is a quote from Wikipedia. My response is "oh no it isn't". I'd like to post a link here to an article on Narcissism, but IMDb won't let me. It regards links as words that are "too long".This article describes the characteristics and effects of narcissism, that explains the plot of the film precisely, and adds immensely to an understanding of the film. This is where I run into trouble with IMDb again, as this review is too short. In addition, cutting and pasting the article would be too long!! A review of Catch-22??!!This is where I run into trouble with IMDb again, as this review is too short. In addition, cutting and pasting the article would be too long!! A review of Catch-22??!!This is where I run into trouble with IMDb again, as this review is too short. In addition, cutting and pasting the article would be too long!! A review of Catch-22??!!

The Transporter (2002)

A far, far, far too long Panerai watch commercial

[1/10 · 30 November 2008]

I like Panerai watches, but, apart from the lovely Shu Qi, this film had little more to recommend it than a Panerai watch commercial. If I'd bothered, I would have lost count of the number of times Jason Statham looked at his watch. However, like Ryan O'Neal in the similar film, The Driver, that seemed to be almost the limit to his acting. I half-remember a review of The Driver that said that Ryan O'Neal had a range of emotions from a to b. Jason Statham is the same; he has "grumpy" and "looking at his watch". The film also reminded me why I stopped buying Stanley Clarke's albums twenty five years ago. The soundtrack was clichéd at its best, and normally far worse. If you want a film with car chases get Ronin, but avoid this like the plague.

The Ruins (2008)

A good horror film, but may not be what it seems

[7/10 · 28 November 2008]

This is a good horror film, because it has the following essential elements;

1. A preposterous plot (more of which later) 2. Pretty young women, one of whom takes her clothes off 3. Ugly, revolting foreign peasants, just like in Frankenstein 4. Some gore and a painful death 5. The odd scary bit

HOWEVER, the plot involves killer bushes that can talk, although not very well. Could it be that the film is, in fact, a political satire based on a certain US President who sometimes has difficulty in talking and has been responsible for the deaths of countless people?

Van Helsing (2004)

Carry on Screaming without the jokes

[2/10 · 23 October 2008]

I've only seen this film described as a horror/thriller, but, after having watched it, I think that it was a parody/comedy gone horribly wrong. The main problem is the lack of jokes. It is even worse than Carry on Screaming, which did, at least, have the great Fenella Fielding. To see how it should be done just watch "Young Frankenstein" - the "help me with the bags" scene is a cinema classic. Even "Dead and loving it" was better, although Lysette Anthony kept her clothes on, and isn't as beautiful as Kate Beckinsale. For $160 million the producers could have done better, and made a decent horror, thriller or comedy, but failed at everything. In the words of Eurovision; "null points", but that's not allowed on IMDb.

21 (2008)

Not as good as the TV documentary

[2/10 · 23 October 2008]

I watched this film on DVD because I'd seen a TV documentary on the subject, which was far more interesting than this film. The plot was far too melodramatic, and the romantic sub-plot completely redundant. I'd be interested to know more about the subject and find out which bits were true, and which complete fiction. I'll need to read more, but won't be watching the film again. Oh, and by the way, the relevance of "counting" wasn't explained. How do they use the number to make their bets? I've also commented elsewhere about why they had to hide the money on the first flight. It didn't make any sense. I'm sorry, but this film was a real disappointment.

The Tudors (2007–2010)

Carry on Henry without the humour

[4/10 · 14 October 2008]

Much has been said about the lack of historical accuracy. The same could be said, but isn't, about Carry on Henry. The Tudors has also been compared to Rome, which I did enjoy. One of the pleasures of Rome was seeing the everyday life of ordinary people. In addition, the standard of acting was high, and a pleasure to watch, unlike most of The Tuors. The Tudors has ignored the lives of ordinary people, apart from odd glimpses during the plague. In addition, the producers also missed a chance with the aerial shots of London to give us an idea of its size, or lack of, in Tudor times, plus the large distances in those days from London to Richmond, Hampton, Oxford and Cambridge. One major flaw is the miscasting of Anne Boleyn, although this is not the producers' fault. The only actress in living memory with the bewitching combination of beauty and sexuality that would make a king risk everything WAS Marilyn Monroe, for whom President Kennedy and his brother risked their positions and families. Having said that Edward 8th and Prince Charles risked everything for Mrs Simpson and Camilla, neither of whom could be said to be a raving beauty. However, Natalie is just a chubby-cheeked young girl - not in any way bewitching. I've been trying to tink of a young actress with the necessary combination, but cannot.

Coupling (2000–2004)

The only cure for the financial crisis

[10/10 · 13 October 2008]

I've watched this series on TV and on DVD umpteen times and every time it makes me laugh out loud. During the financial crisis it's been about the only silver lining. It's a combination of real, familiar characters, true-to-life situations, plus great scripts and a BRILLIANT ENSEMBLE CAST. What more could you ask for? I haven't seen the American version and I don't want to. It makes me shiver to just think about how they'd ruin it. Just remember the Wicker Man. They turned a horror film into a comedy. Some people have called it a British Friends. The major difference is that Coupling has proper actors, and it really does make a BIG difference.

Life on Mars (2006–2007)

I didn't think I'd ever buy a Sweet album

[10/10 · 10 October 2008]

In a world of American series, excellent though some are, this British production is a gem. Unique though it is, it's influences are many, but great; The first obvious one is The Sweeney, a fond memory for many of us. The next is Francis Ford Copolla's "Peggy Sue Got Married", for wistful time travel. Then there's Morse, and other crime dramas, plus Serpico for a "clean" cop amongst corruption. Last, and not least, is the music - a British version of Scorcese's "Casino", hence the title of the review. The whole cast is excellent, although, for me, the star, John Simm, is put in the background by Philip Glenister. I'm half-way through series one on DVD, and looking forward to series two.

Longford (2006 TV Movie)

Brilliant due to the performances.

[8/10 · 23 September 2008]

I was only a boy at the time of the Moors Murders, so remember very little about them. However, this film has made me want to find out more, especially about Myra Hindley, who was portrayed in this film almost like a brunette Marylin Monroe. She captivated everybody and made them fall in love with her, possibly even Lord Longford.

The performances by all the main characters were first class, especially Jim Broadbent as Lord Longford, and Samantha Morton as Myra. Compared to Charlize Theron who, almost literally, turned herself into a monster for "Monster", Samantha Morton played Myra as a very attractive woman, but equally evil. The way the film was made, even at the end I didn't know who was "really guilty" Brady or Myra. Andy Serkis as Brady made a compelling psychopath, whereas Myra's part was far more ambiguous. Linsday Duncan was brilliant, as ever, as Lady Longford

Under Siege (1986 TV Movie)

How it should have been done, maybe.

[5/10 · 18 September 2008]

This is not a GREAT film, but in the aftermath of 911 and the War on Terror, now that we know the consequences of following the hawks and their lies regarding threats from Weapons of Mass Destruction, this film demonstrates what could have happened by getting all the proper evidence first. From reading some other comments, I understand that it has not been shown on American TV for some time (I saw it on Malaysian TV). Perhaps it has been banned as subversive by the White House.

It is a typical "TV movie" with a few of the "usual TV movie suspects", but has a valid point, which is put over quite well. In addition, the terrorists are not overly "foaming at the mouth" fanatics, for which we should be grateful, compared to, say, the terrorists in "True Lies".

The Sopranos (1999–2007)

Maybe will be studied in schools of the future

[9/10 · 10 September 2008]

I've only watched the first series on DVD, but would summarise The Sopranos as a Shakespearean plot with a Tarantino-like script. The series is as good as Goodfellas and Casino, and almost as good as The Godfather (hence not a "10"), and far better than any of Guy Ritchie's efforts. Although there's plenty of action, some of it pretty bloody, the story is character driven. Even some of the minor characters contribute to great story lines; e.g. the priest's relationship (or lack of) with Carmilla and the restaurateur's wife, and Christopher and his dimwit friend (who didn't last very long (a Darwin Award nominee?))

Apart from the plot, the script and the acting, the other reasons I liked it;

1. It made me want to visit New Jersey and eat pasta with a tomatoey sauce. 2. The music. 3. It shows that literally anyone can suffer from mental health problems.

Marie Antoinette (2006)

First impressions can be wrong

[8/10 · 19 August 2008]

When I heard the first few bars of guitar during the introduction to this film I thought; "oh no, an American teen movie disguised as a historical drama". However, I was wrong; it is both, and the teen aspects emphasise how young Marie Antoinette was. Often, with major historical figures, we forget, or just don't know. Henry the 8th's various wives. Queen Elizabeth the first. Even the Dambusters. They were all very young.

I find the sign of a good film is that I want to know more. Recently I watched a DVD of Charlie Wilson's War, and immediately afterwards got on to Wikipedia. It was the same here. I wanted to know more. A thoroughly enjoyable film. The acting is excellent and believable. Rip Torn asking about Marie Antoinette's "bosom". I could almost imagine the Duke of Edinburgh asking about Diana's tits.