dth_blade Reviews

Skinwalkers (2006)

Boring plot with bad acting and CGI effects

[1/10 · 2 November 2008]

This movie is boring. I thought it was going to be like Underworld with two fighting clans both trying to create a super monster. I wasted an hour and a half of my life watching this.

The werewolf costumes don't look anything like a wolf. They just have sharp teeth and are hairier. And they don't talk, they just roar. I could tell my dad to stop shaving for a month, buy some fangs from the Halloween shop, and grunt like a gorilla, and he would look like the werewolves in this movie. I saw scarier things while watching Scooby Doo.

The plot is nothing new, either. 2 packs of wolves. One wants to end the curse, one doesn't. They fight, and the good guys win. Waaaaaaaay too predictable. There is no twist in the story. No big secrets. No surprises that change everything. You could guess the whole movie after watching the beginning.

The ending isn't anything spectacular. It doesn't go out with a big bang. Nothing happens to the boy. He doesn't turn into Superman and save everybody. He doesn't get any super-powers that everybody says he should have. He just... stays the same. You could feel that at the very end, the director probably said "Lets finish this. I need to go home." This movie is boring. The plot is boring. And the fight scenes are terrible. If you want a good movie that has monster against monster, go watch Underworld. It has a better plot.

Spirited Away (2001)

Great movie that develops characters

[10/10 · 4 September 2008]

I loved this movie when I saw it. The characters in this film mature a lot, especially Chihiro. When this movie first starts, Chihoro is a spoiled brat who only cares about herself. When her parents turn into pigs, she is alone and has to fend for herself. She goes to work in a bathhouse for spirits in hopes of convincing her boss to free her parents. At first she does a bad job, even her supervisor asked her if she ever worked a day in her life. After her first successful job with the river spirit, she gains a lot of self-confidence and is respected from the other employees. During her adventures, she saves 3 other employees from a lonely spirit and eventually frees a forgotten childhood friend. She makes a lot of friends and eventually frees her parents. By the end, Chihiro changes from a spoiled brat to a mature woman.

Romeo & Juliet: Sealed with a Kiss (2005)

Changed everything

[1/10 · 7 August 2008]

This movie was bad on its own. The singing was horrible. But the fact that they took Shakespeare play and turned it into mush is unacceptable.

Everything was different from the original Shakespeare script. For starters, NOBODY died in this movie. Not Romeo, not Juliet, not Mercutio, not Tybalt(who was not even in the film). And Juliet is to marry the prince instead of Paris(who again, is not in this film) I know that its for kids but you are doing Shakespeare so all his plays have tragedy. None of his films have happy endings. This film might have been a bit better if it was a brand new film, but if you say you are going to follow Shakespeare, at least do not change the whole plot and have the guts to pin it on him.

Justice League: The New Frontier (2008 Video)

Total mockery unrelated to the Justice League

[1/10 · 28 January 2008]

I would give this movie a zero if that was an option. This movie has nothing that relates to the original Justice League. The League has broken up. There is no justice here, only vengeance. In the beginning of the movie, Diana stands watch while a group of criminals are murdered, and gets killed by a giant flying thing later in the movie, but revives fully in less than 15 minutes. Barry gets owned by armed forces. Bruce goes solo and you only see him fight once for 10 seconds. J'onn looks like some kind of Hercules with a bald head. Hal Jordan is some kind of wanna-be superhero. The ship kills Clark with a giant Kamehameha blast, but he too revives fully in less than 10 minutes.

Everybody looks weird. Never once in the movie did the whole League join forces. The original Justice League was about teamwork. This piece of crap just has all the members of the League going Rambo.

AVH: Alien vs. Hunter (2007 Video)

Utter crap

[1/10 · 8 December 2007]

This film is total crap. I walked out after watching half an hour. I thought I was going to watch something like AvP. But this is nothing. The hunter looks like the black power ranger with a weird hat wielding a giant gun and the alien looks like a giant spider with claws. The characters are so stupid too.A giant spider alien is chasing them and they sit around and have a town meeting about what to do. Then they go into the pipes somehow and the pipes are so big that they could stand up and walk around freely. I could go on all day about how bad this is but there will be no point. Take my advice and don't ever think about this again.

Bee Movie (2007)

Really boring

[1/10 · 10 November 2007]

I wanted to enjoy this movie. I really did. But this truly bores me out. heard that Jerry Seinfeld was making a movie, I thought it would be funny. Now the producers probably think it is funny that they scammed a lot of people for their money just by putting Seinfeld on the show.

The biggest problem here was the believability. I have a big imagination and I can accept almost anything that I watch, but this really pisses me off. The whole story is that the bees don't like people taking their honey so Berry(Seinfeld) takes them to court and sues humans. Now, I've seen lots of animation and the characters are rarely human so I easily accepted that bees could talk here. The thing that really annoyed me was the fact that they went to court. That just bored me away and I'm sure it did to a lot of other people too. Very few movies were successful that focused about life in court, and the ones that made it were serious movies, not jokes. The justice system and jokes don't mix well, and this is more than enough proof for that.

Now, if this movie went a different way, it might have worked. It had a good idea, but expressed it in a very bad way. In my opinion, it would have been a lot better if instead of suing humans in court, they just stung them until they stopped taking honey. Would have made it much more believable and this movie might have actually been good.

So my final note for all Directors and other people thinking about making a movie or show. The justice system is serious and jokes are funny. They don't mix. At all.

Superman/Doomsday (2007 Video)

Comic was good. Movie sucked.

[1/10 · 3 November 2007]

I'm a fan of Superman. I've read almost all his comics. When I saw this movie come out, I was eager to watch it. Boy was I disappointed.

First off, Superman looks cheesy. His cheeks are square. Whoever drew him must have been paid 10 bucks and did it in an hour.

Second, it didn't follow anything in the comic. Doomsday took out the whole justice league in the book but superman tacked him alone here. Luthor had nothing to do with him in the book but now he's smack in the middle of it.

Those are just some parts that don't follow the book. There are many more but it would take forever to list them all. Just take my advice and save your money to buy the book instead.

Rise: Blood Hunter (2007)

Confusing and boring

[1/10 · 1 November 2007]

I watched this thinking it was a new vampire genre like the advertisements said. One thing you learn is to never, ever trust ads. Most of the time there is more lies than truths.

The movie starts as Sadie(Lucy Liu) starts the film by kidnapping a victim, then killing a vampire for information, and freeing her victim. Then suddenly she falls asleep and it jumps to her waking up in the morgue. But then it jumps to when she wasn't a vampire yet, and it goes over the beginning of how she died.

This is just one part where it jumps around. The whole movie jumps around so much that you don't even know what is happening when. Another part is when she gets kidnapped and stuffed into the trunk of a car, then suddenly, shes in a strange building with no explanation of how she got there. Then afterward, it jumps back to her in the trunk.

This would be a better movie if it stayed in order. Unfortunately, it didn't and it makes it very confusing.

Surf's Up (2007)

Most boring movie ever!

[1/10 · 6 October 2007]

I watched this movie expecting it to be something like cars or over the hedge. Something with a good plot. Boy, was I disappointed. It was the most boring movie ever. The whole movie is a documentary. There is way too much talking, and not nearly enough action. Without spoiling anything all I will say is that the Cody, who is the main guy, gets beaten and, after a adventure, he learns a lesson about life.(remind anyone of cars?) It's similar to Cars, but instead of racing, we have surfing penguins. The BIG difference between this and Cars, which was pretty good, is that this was filmed as a documentary. Waaaaaay too much talking and very little action.

Ghost Rider (2007)

If you can't watch this for free, don't watch it

[1/10 · 26 June 2007]

I went to see Ghost Rider because hes a famous Marvel character. After the movie, I realized I wasted $10 of my hard earned money and 2 hours of my life that I couldn't get back. The plot was too obvious. After watching the beginning of it, you can guess what happens in the end. Basically the devil creates a Ghost Rider to deal with his son. And the whole movie revolves around that plot. Throw in a lover as a hostage and teacher who was a Ghost Rider before him, and the whole movie is laid out. There are no plot twists and the fight scenes are horrible. The script was also badly written. The evil henchmen fight him one by one and get owned. He becomes a suspect for murder, escapes from jail, destroys police cars and property, and the police just leave him alone.After he escapes from jail, he can still go back to his apartment but there are no SWAT officers or any other type of law enforcements waiting for him.

This is one horrible movie.