kurgan_uk Reviews

Black Widow (2021)

Better than I expected

[8/10 · 7 July 2021]

The story isn't preposterous.

The action is good but not over the top.

Its funny in places and poignant at times.

It fits perfectly within its timeframe.

I'm glad they made this movie.

2048: Nowhere to Run (2017)

The best of the bunch

[9/10 · 15 October 2017]

Having seen all the shorts and the new movie I have to say that this is the most 'Blade Runner' of the 4. It may only be 5 Min's long but for those 5 Min's I felt like was watching a deleted scene from the original. It has the right gritty noir feel to it. Mr Bautista is coming on leaps and bounds with his acting career, big thumbs up here.

Star Trek Into Darkness (2013)

A pile of t*ss that takes a dump over the original.

[1/10 · 10 May 2013]

This is not a reboot, it's a jackboot and it's been smashed into the faces of anyone who loved the original series and movies.

I'm not debating the technical efforts of the movie, they were excellent. But the story line left me clenching my teeth at the audacity and lengths they have gone to try and obliterate the original.

It's a jackboot in the box of a movie, you are on the edge of your seat up to the big reveal and then you just have to say "WHAAAT!?" as the heel hits you in the face.

If you are a trekkie and you love the original series then this movie will leave you emotionally dead, not just the plot line but the cheesy lines that spoof the previous movies as they mash them out of history.

Avoid if you love the originals.

I am enacting the Highlander 2 protocol now and denying the existence of this movie. Now, what was I saying... I can't remember.. never mind, I'm off to watch Star Trek 2 now..

Solomon Kane (2009)

Reminded me of the sword and sorcery videos of the 80's

[5/10 · 24 February 2010]

Back in the mid 80's my brother and i would chuck a couple of pounds together and hire 4 or 5 videos for the weekend. We would get a couple of top rated vids and a couple of cheap vids. Invariably the cheap vids were straight to video sword and sorcery efforts that all seemed to use the same studio sets and all had the same basic plots, Hero strives through adversity to save young lady from clutches of power hungry wizard.

Solomon Caine,despite being from a great storyteller, reminded me of those cheap videos. Same basic plot, just has better special effects. Watch it if there is nothing else you would prefer to watch, but for £6 you're not going to get your moneys worth.

Surrogates (2009)

A competent 'what if' scenario.

[7/10 · 26 September 2009]

The first episode of The New Twilight Zone had Bruce's character being taken over by a doppleganger, here we have a turnaround, Bruce's character is taking back his life from a doppleganger.

I enjoyed this movie but it didn't leave me with any lasting thoughts, usually I ponder on a movie as I drive home, good or bad, but this one was as disposable as an episode of twilight zone, it lasted 90 minutes and it entertained for 90 minutes and that was it.

I did have one thought, if these androids can run and jump so fast then why would people have them walk along the street like normal people? You see many people in online games walking from A to B? No, they run everywhere with inexhaustible stamina. Just an idle thought.

Odysseus the Greatest Hero of Them All: The Golden Slagheap (1986) Season 1, Episode 1

A master storyteller

[10/10 · 31 August 2009]

Having watched Tony's 'Fat Tulip' storytelling prowess I eagerly waited to see the first episode of this story when it came out in 1986. How i wish i had known just how good it was going to be. As the first episode ended i was already taking the foil off a new blank video to use for the coming episodes.

More than 20 years later and as i watch his retelling of the tale of the Iliad and Odyssey i still slap my head in frustration at missing the first episode.

The writing is excellent and Tony tells it with as much verve and charisma as anyone could possibly hope to match. What are rather dull and hard to read books are made into a joy by Tony's on screen antics and characterisation's.

I can't find this available to buy, which a big shame as it deserves to be released to the general public to enjoy again.

Battlestar Galactica (2004–2009)

So long, and thanks for all the fish!

[10/10 · 24 March 2009]

Did anyone else have the end music from Hitch Hikers Guide to the Galaxy, the TV series, going through their head as the final 50 minutes played out? I half expected Adama to say 'i think we'll call it Flintlewoodlewix' :-)

Seriously though, the best sci fi ever.. well OK, best so far..I hope we can have more of this because this series had me gripped from start to finish. Everything works, the plot, the script, the acting, the style, the sfx...superb. I can't believe they even had a meeting at the United Nations about the topics brought up during the series, that's how powerful it was.

My one real puzzlement, what the frak was Starbuck all about!? Needs some serious explaining.

I hope the spin off series are up to the calibre of this series. It's been 30 mins since I watched the last episode and I have withdrawal symptoms already.

Mutant Chronicles (2008)

no, no no, even leaving your brain at the door this doesn't work.

[4/10 · 14 October 2008]

I can only imagine that the actors here had nothing better to do for a few weeks.

A straight to video movie that managed to get a cinema release on the strength of the actors involved.

I gave it 4 stars because I like the style of the movie, computer noirish. It starts out quite interesting but as soon as the real plot starts up it all goes to hell in a hand-basket. The plot is full of logic holes so big you could march the Capitol army through it.

Wait for the DVD, wait till it comes out on budget DVD, wait till your mate buys it and then borrow it.. wait till it comes out on TV.

In response to some posters who said they see no plot holes.. We are talking about one machine up the mountains, it spews out mutants, who can only walk or run, they can only replicate by dragging their victims back to the machine (at dragging pace) and yet they take over the world in a matter of weeks! There's one scene where the hero's are attacked in the air by a mutant controlled craft, but you can tell by the surprise on the captains face that this was a first so the mutants didn't use aircraft very often.

The crown on the illogic head was the hero's going back to the machine after what, a week? a month? a year? how long does a marching mutant horde take to conquer the world? anyway who do they find, still being dragged to his doom but a character (Mr Pertwee) who was one of the first to meet the mutants when they attacked, what a blatant and dumb plot device to get the main hero away from the rest of gang.

And of course there is the fact that the first time the mutants arrived they were repelled by sword wielding knights. After 2,000 years of military evolution it seems nothing really beats a good old sword.

Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull (2008)

At Last! everything makes sense

[8/10 · 29 May 2008]

I left the cinema and it felt like a weight had been lifted from my shoulders. It was all so clear now, Raiders, Doom, Crusade.. not religious artifacts... ALIEN artifacts left behind by visiting spacemen and taken by the superstitious primitives as instruments of God. It makes more sense.. Imagine if you find conclusive proof that God exists, how can life ever be the same knowing everything you do will be judged.

But presenting aliens as the source of magic brings the universe back into alignment again.. Thank you George and Steven.

The problem with Indy 4 isn't that it's a bad movie, it's definitely not a bad movie. But I'm not 12 anymore and there have been umpteen Indyalike movies in past 20 years so the magic has been spread thin. I still enjoyed it though. I liked the over the top action.. Lead lined fridge in a nuclear blast.. 4 drops off precipices.. silly Russian accents, had me chuckling quietly to myself.

If you are 12 and haven't seen any Indy movies before then you'll love it. If you're 38 but still have a child inside you then you'll enjoy it but if you're a boring grown up then don't bother, it'll annoy you.

Cloverfield (2008)

Good plot for a Computer game,,though wait a moment!

[7/10 · 24 February 2008]

Imagine you are playing SimCity and have just hit the random monster attack option. Up pops the Godzilla like monster, then suddenly you are thrown into the PC world with a video camera in your hand. Voila! Cloverfield.

As I watched this movie I just kept wondering what I would build on the vacant plots of land that the monster was leaving behind.

Enjoyed the movie, once you get passed the first 15 minutes of plot filler (that was never in SimCity! though maybe it will be in the latest version :-)

I can't wait for the alien attack sequel.