halliwellleonard Reviews

Wild Target (2010)

Awful

[2/10 · 7 January 2021]

Decent actors and a god awful flick. Couldn't watch much more than half an hour of this bilge. It was dreadful.

The Midnight Sky (2020)

Abysmal

[1/10 · 23 December 2020]

Awful. Excruciating to watch. Gut wrenching and immediately forgettable. George Clooney directed with no direction. One of those films you hope to get better but it never does.

Is My Daughter Really Dead? (2019)

1970's Type Bilge

[2/10 · 17 November 2020]

Reminded me of a 1970's Sunday run of the mill TV film. Terrible narrative and terrible acting. Looked like it was made for about $5,000. Awful, Awful, Awful for the entire flick. 4 out of 964 million.

Swedish Dicks (2016–2018)

Disastrously Awful

[1/10 · 13 November 2020]

I watched one episode of this bilge because Peter Stormare was in it and that was a big mistake. I can only assume that the good reviews here were bought and paid for because this was not funny at all. In fact, it wasn't anything at all. Formulaic and cheap come to mind and that's the best I can give this mess. In actual fact I'm changing my score to 4 out of 975 million.

Daylight Robbery (2008)

Pathetic

[1/10 · 6 November 2020]

Typical noisy cockneys robbing a bank. Bang and shout all the way through this awful flick. Usual assortment of cockney bit part actors labour through this dreadful story. 3 out of 975 million.

The Haunting of Bly Manor (2020)

Turgid

[2/10 · 9 October 2020]

The only horrifying thing about this series is the narrative, most of the acting and the predictability of the film, which in fairness is sterile and goes nowhere. Nice film for your 90 year old granny to watch with a cup of hot chocolate before slipping off into sleep. To top this series off, both the upper class children in this series are as annoying as a wasp around your beer. The leading lady is probably the worse actress in the film. Coupled with her being far too short, she also walked around like Charlie Chaplin. This film had no scares, no edge of the seat moments and cannot be termed as horror at all. It was also well overrated by Rotten Tomatoes...... Ah well! They've done that before haven't they. $$$$$

Hoboken Hollow (2006)

Rednecks and Bloodlust

[1/10 · 12 September 2020]

Just got through 35 minutes of this crap. Fair cast but the movie is just about violent hillbillies with the intellect of lobotomized spiders.They basically prowl around causing carnage and provide nothing but archetypal mayhem and murder. Michael Madsen turned up doing the least he can possibly do again. This is rock bottom awful. Based on 40 minutes or so I'd give this film 4 out of 468 billion.

Spiders (2013)

Disastrously Awful

[1/10 · 19 August 2020]

Terrible. Can't think of anything to add to this arachnid catastrophy of a flick. Usual 1950's type format matched by stereotype acting and awful storyline. My score......3 out of 864 billion.

Ghost Wars (2017–2018)

Abysmal

[2/10 · 17 June 2020]

It's no wonder this drivel got axed after the first series. It's a giant mish mash of a storyline and I blew it off after series 6. A couple of decent actors trying their best to navigate the awful CGI and really crap special effects. In short it was a low budget series that was a bit of a mess and going no place in particular.

Red Dragon (2002)

Hammy Hopkins Strikes Again

[3/10 · 13 April 2020]

What really came after the excellent "Manhunter" ??? Two mediocre attempts to throw money at two high profile Hollywood productions to pull in the punters.They've tried this before and failed. The hammed up performances and blood and gore that followed were more comical than scary. Brian Cox's Lector in "Manhunter" was classical, frightening and disturbing. This was just another Rocky 15 gone wrong.

Mermaid Down (2019)

Fish and Chips

[3/10 · 5 April 2020]

I was surprised to find out that mermaids come out of the sea with full make overs and perfectly manicured nails. I was wondering if you could buy them at the fishmongers and how much would they cost ? The cast actually talk about mermaids as if they're not unique at all and you could most likely pick a few up in your local pub.

Money Heist (2017–2021)

Childish Drivel

[1/10 · 5 April 2020]

The storyline is absolutely ridiculous. This moronic hash of a robbery of epic proportions wouldn't have lasted half an hour in the real world. I'm sure Spain must have some kind of special forces or an elite military response team that would have put this farce to bed in no time at all. The robbers were mostly brain dead and constantly ended up pointing guns at each other. Where did this 'professor' recruit them from ? Probably a Wetherspoons pub or a an agent who manages extremely bad actors.. People who believe in tooth fairies and Father Christmas will love this bilge. I'll give it 4 out of 863 billion.

Ghost in the Graveyard (2019)

Dog poo in the Graveyard

[2/10 · 2 April 2020]

Usual collection of hideous Catholic nuns, devil worshippers, graveyards, nasty schoolgirls and dumb arse cops make this movie instantly forgettable. What Jake Busey was doing in this flick I just don't know. Got no spoilers cos there's nothing to spoil.

Gone in 60 Seconds (2000)

Drivel

[3/10 · 2 April 2020]

Most of the audience would be gone in 60 seconds if they knew what was coming up. A very good cast wasted their time on this flick, apart from Nicholas Cage of course who is more wooden than Sherwood Forest.

Black Mirror: The National Anthem (2011) Season 1, Episode 1

Surreal

[6/10 · 30 March 2020]

Entertaining but ridiculous in theory. The randsom demand would never be taken seriously by any government in the world and the security forces lacked effort.

Aftermath (VII) (2014)

Realism in Perspective

[8/10 · 27 March 2020]

This movie does not offer a small respite at all. It's gripping and no one comes to the rescue. Working on a small budget it excels over many rescue type movies on a high budget. Its clostraphobic, well written and excellently acted.

The Monkey's Paw (I) (2013)

Loved It

[8/10 · 27 March 2020]

Stephen Lang and C J Thomason plus great supporting cast. What more do you want ? It's a really good horror/thriller and it does not disappoint.

Deadly Shores (2018 TV Movie)

Pathetic

[1/10 · 16 March 2020]

Can't give any spoilers when there's nothing to spoil. Looks like a 70's TV film for old age pensioners. Crap acting and crappy storyline. I gave it 1 out of ten but in reality I'd give it 3 out of 853 billion.

Feardotcom (2002)

Ludicrously Terrible

[1/10 · 6 March 2020]

Just watched this on Netflix. I've not put any spoilers out because there's nothing to spoil. Terrible storyline that makes not one iota of sense. Awful flick.

Between (2015–2016)

Pretty Lake = Pretty Awful.

[1/10 · 2 March 2020]

Who wrote this trash ? Just watched one and a half episodes. Every story has to have one iota of credibility. I assume this is modern day Canada and in modern day Canada they've never heard of human rights, medicine or quarantine and containment. As if you'd put up a barricade with armed guards shooting anyone who'd try to escape. And there's no immediate concern worldwide about this possible pandemic ? WTF.

Loads of WTF moments in this flick. A girl has just had a baby 7 days before and some dork with a brain on the same level of a lobotomized spider 🕷 visits her and says, "Fancy coming hunting ?" The same girl is supposed to be neglecting herself and hasn't had a meal for 4 days, yet she looks as fresh as a daisy and has obviously had a full make over and her nails manicured ? There's no law and order and everyone is stealing anything they can, yet people are shown queuing up for 'free food' at a store.

My revised core is.....3 out of 57 million.

Paradox (III) (2016)

Time For a Laugh

[10/10 · 29 February 2020]

Adam Huss has a great acting career in front of him if he takes acting lessons and a pound of crystal meth before going on set. He makes Nic Cage look like Robert De Niro at his best.

Torrid love affair between Mr Huss and Zoe Bell 🤣😂 Zoe's not blessed with good looks or an ability to act but if it wasn't for her flashing her two ample breasts off, this movie wouldn't have ever been made. It was the only memorable thing in the film.

I've got a tip for everyone thinking of watching this. Watch it backwards because it might make more sense.

Score.......4 out of 974 billion.

Before I Wake (2016)

Left hanging.

[7/10 · 28 February 2020]

I really enjoyed this movie for most part of it but I felt that the end of the film came 15 minutes to early. I thought the storyline was a little disjointed and the married couple who adopted the child had no real connection with each other whatsoever. As I say, I enjoyed this film but I think the film would have been more compelling to watch if the child's dead mother wasn't a stereotypical screaming banshee and her role was toned down a little. The director seemed to be over mixing the horror angle when it wasn't necessary. The end of the movie just left me hanging. The whole storyline was a bit splintered.