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Reviews
Colossus: The Forbin Project (1970)
"There is another system"
I have not seen this movie in 30 years, but I remember every scene as if it were yesterday, and the deep feelings that I had when I first saw it lingers on as well. THOSE are the marks of a truly memorable film.
If a film like this were made today, even including a contemporary problem to replace the Cold War theme, it would go over the heads of a majority of the audience. Why? Because the movie-going public wants blow-em-up action to go along with any plot. Except for the cities that the twin terrors Colossus-Guardian nuke (almost off camera), this has none. Secondly, this is a thinking-person's movie that goes beyond the typical "Machines take over the world" theme that we've seen in the Terminator series and the Matrix series.
What makes this move work on so many levels is that it taps into our greatest fears -- one of which is NOT death, but the loss of control over our lives. Why are people afraid to fly when their chances of being killed in an auto crash are so many times greater? Loss of control.
These supercomputers were designed to act in the place of humans by making human-like decisions such as "Kill or be killed" and "Offense makes the best defense." Unlike other machines vs. humans, in this movie, the computers do not fear humans, or even dislike them. Even when they kill a few million, it is done without malice. It is pure logic, and that is what is also scary -- making decisions without regard to the value of a single, human life. To the computer, deaths are just statistics, and in the "Mutually-Assured-Destruction" mentality of the Cold War, the side who has the last man standing is declared the winner.
Also, unlike contemporary movies, these two, big computing hulks do not become "self-aware" in any human sense. Nor do they go beyond the level of their individual programming. They are making decisions that they have been taught will make for a better world.
There are no, "Forbin as father and Colossus as son" overtones here like those in "I-Robot." If anything, Colossus becomes the authoritarian father-figure -- as in "I know what is best for you" -- perhaps mirroring Forbin's real father. This authoritarian father complex is what drives the computer's decisions.
It does not take a great leap of consciousness for Colossus/Guardian to know that threats alone do not work with children. There has to be logical consequences for their misbehavior also -- which are horrible to even think about in the human mind, but in the computer mind, it is "Necessary" for the good of all concerned.
How many human leaders/despots have followed that logic? Too many to count.
Swimming Pool (2003)
Story stinks, acting sinks
This is a prime example of how to waste what could have been a decent thriller by resorting to the tired cliche of tricking the viewer into thinking that what is transpiring is NOT all in the writers imagination.
It does not matter what was real or imagined, because all of it was ponderous, pretentious, and wholly unbelievable.
Sure, a naked Sagnier was nice to look at, but getting a full frontal of Rampling wiped out that image. Speaking of Rampling, I've seen more movement from corpses on CSI. All I wanted to do throughout the movie was to wipe that sneering smile off her face -- which was the extent of her emotional range.
There were SO many clues in the movie that what you were watching was not real (but out of the mind of the writer), that I cannot see how anyone could say otherwise.
Think Sarah had sex with Marcel? Think again. Think Sarah helps Julie bury a murdered Franck with less emotion than when she dumped Julie's kitchen trash? No way.
Slinky Julie was Sarah's fantasy representation of chubby Julia, and that was the only "surprise" of the movie; i.e., that the real "Julie" looked nothing like the author's imaginary one.
This was a movie in which I kept waiting for something to happen. Check that, waiting for many things to happen like a recognizable story line with plot twists.
This swimming pool was drained dry before it even began.
The Last Samurai (2003)
"Dances with Wolves" meets "Shogun"
Overall, I enjoyed the film but would have enjoyed it much, much more if they had left out the ever-present Hollywood overtones, and the inevitable sellout to the lowest common denominator.
Why is it that Hollywood assumes the average audience is too stupid to follow innovative plot lines, or that they always wants to reach closure with a simplistic ending?
There are a few parallels between "Samurai's" Capt. Nathan Algren, a disillusioned Civil War vet suffering from post-traumatic stress syndrome, and "Wolves'" Lt. John Dunbar, also a disillusioned Civil War vet, but for different reasons. Both try to destroy their lives and both discover new ones in the process.
There are also parallels between the gorgeous scenery of the US and of Japan, and of an intimate look into the intricate culture of both the American Indian and the Samurai. Added to it are wonderful musical scores.
Unfortunately, though the film goes to great lengths to draw parallels between the American Indian and the Samurai, it stops well short of clarifying why they were similar and why they were different.
Where "Shogun" comes into the mix is how the protagonist begins his life as captor, and becomes a hero for saving the life of the local leader.
These derivative elements aside, my main problem with the film was how aimlessly, at times, were the significant interchanges between Kastumoto and Algren. There was SO very much that could have been learned from Katsumoto's mouth, but he spent way too much time simply spouting Zen platitudes.
Another bothersome part of the film was how little the writers did to clarify the conflict between Kastumoto, the Emperor, his advisers, and the Council. What were they fighting about exactly?
There was a real Samurai revolt in 1876, but the story here shed little light on it.
Cruise gives a great performance in this role, but IMHO, it is not on a par with his performance in "Minority Report" -- an outstanding film that got totally snubbed at Oscar time.
Maybe my opinion of this film will change when I see it again on DVD. Hopefully, they will include an alternate ending -- the one that should have shown who really was the Last Samurai.
Ice Age (2002)
I loved this film!
What I think is a testament to this animated film is the fact that I forgot it was an animated film while watching it.
The artwork is beautiful and captivating, but the antics and cameraderie of the cast are what take it to a higher level. The storyline is not unique, but how many films are these days? What is unique is how well the writer, producer, director and cast all work together.
Despite the superficial resemblance to "Three Men and a Baby," this is a buddy film in all respects. The characters continually play off each other in subtle ways lacking in such other films as "Monsters, Inc." and even "Shrek."
Ray Romano, John Leguizamo, and Denis Leary work so well together that it's hard to believe this was their first, joint project. The only flaw I found in this trio was Romano's voiceover of Manny (which was no different from his "Everybody Loves Raymond" character). As plain, bland, and easily recognizable as Ray's voice was, it was more than compensated by Leguizamo's quirky-sounding Sid and Leary's cool-cat rendition of Diego.
From the moment the movie begins, the gags flow fast and furious, thanks to the addition of the adorable Scrat (voiceover by Director, Chris Wedge). Scrat is the Pleistocene's answer to Wile E. Coyote, but much funnier. There are other throwbacks to previous animated fare (such as Tarzan and Lion King), but, for the most part, Ice Age avoids the strictly formulaic approach to toon films that Hollywood seems to lazily adopt. Sure, there are those intentionally sentimental moments you have come to expect in every Disney film ever made. Yet, they are not so weighty as to put a drag on the comic continuity of the film.
There are also moments in the film where you can see homage being paid to the great animator and gagster, Fred Avery, as when all the characters make their imprint on a snow bank as they crash into it at high speed.
This is a film that has something for all age groups. It has silly toon humor for the kidlets, and sly innuendoes for the adults. I cannot wait to see it again.
Nurse Betty (2000)
If this were a soap, it would be called "Searching For Laughs"
I rented "Nurse Betty" last night thinking it would be a hands-down winner given the rating it received from movie critics.
Did they see a different film than I did?
If this film were a soap opera like the one it depicted, it would be called, "Searching for Laughs." I tried, and found very few.
Worse than the lack of laughs, the "Pulp Fiction" rip-off in this film made the whole sub-plot totally ludicrous.
Morgan Freeman as a kindly, old hitman who falls in love with Zellweger's Betty? Give me a break! What kind of sentimental character calmly watches his foul-mouthed, maniac of a son pistol-whip his victims?
Speaking of whom, choosing Chris Rock for this role was worse than anything "Freddy Got Fingered" could muster. Take away his incessant "F" words, and he would have said less than Arnold in "Terminator I."
Showing him scalp a guy was real fresh for a comedy, too. Makes the chipper in "Fargo" look tame. At that point, I should have popped the DVD out and demanded my money back from Blockbuster.
The main story might have been good if the director and writer together had half a brain and kept in on track. But it wandered all over the screen just as Nurse Betty and her "wacky band of hitmen" did across America.
Kudos to Ms. Zellweger for a fine performance in an otherwise dog of a supposed hit movie. Greg Kinnear did his best, too, given what limited range he had in this script.
How was it that everybody all over the whole world watched "Searching for love," EXCEPT for every member of the Hispanic family who took Betty into their home?
There were many other inconsistencies, but they pale in light of the predicably lame ending.
After watching this mess, I wish I had done as Freeman's character did in the movie and ended it all before the final credits.
Holy Smoke (1999)
I'd rather have five root canals than watch this film!
Possibly THE WORST FILM I have ever watched. It was pure torture to sit through it all...and the only reason I stayed until the end is because I was waiting for something good to happen. Unfortunately, the only good thing to happen was the rolling of the credits.
The Secret of My Succe$s (1987)
Delightful take on "How To Succeed in Business Without Really Trying"
What sets this movie apart from standard sitcom material are the acting performances, tight scripting, funny sight gags, and great musical score.
If you liked Michael J. Fox in "Back to the Future," you'll love him in this role. Much like BTTF, this is not a film to take seriously, but to enjoy it for what it is.
Which is a film that I can watch 100 times and never get bored of it.
Gladiator (2000)
A "Must See" film for guys and a reason to buy a DVD player
If you happen to come across another review of this movie that draws comparisons to other films of the same genre, such as "Spartacus," or "Ben-Hur," I would immediately stop reading it. I strongly believe that a film should be judged on its own merits.
If you want to find fault with this movie, there are certainly opportunities to do so, but, in my opinion, this movie is a rare gem with only minor flaws.
Regardless of what critics might say, if a film has a lasting emotional and visceral impact on me, then I will strongly recommend it to others.
The combination of stunning visuals, a moving musical score, and top-notch acting are the reasons why I ran out to buy the DVD (get the 2-disc set) when it was released. There are few movies that I would want to watch more than one time. Two examples are "Braveheart" and "Boys Don't Cry." Both excellent films, and very moving, but once is more than enough.
By contrast, I can never get enough of Russell Crowe ("Maximus") or Ridley Scott (the Director) who are the real stars of this film.
Ridley Scott is a genius for transporting the viewer to alien worlds whether they are in the far future ("Blade Runner") or the distant past, as he does here in Gladiator.
If you are guy and the opening battle sequence does nothing to get your blood pumping, then you are, as Maximus exhorts his soldiers in that scene "...already dead."