Change Your Image
framer94
Reviews
Inside Lara Roxx (2011)
There's a compelling film somewhere involving this woman's sad, tragic life, but Inside Lara Roxx is not it.
I waited a year to see this film- prior to seeing it, I saw the trailer- which presented a dark, frightening documentary with graphic and disturbing undertones (through watching the trailer, that is the impression of the kinda subject matter one will see in the film).After watching the film itself though, I feel that the trailer took certain scenes from the film and manipulated them to make the trailer 'scary.'
Th film, I thought, captures Lara at her best moments, but it does not capture the tragedy and misery of what she actually experienced. It is more of an arms length feeling towards the film's subject. Lara seems to have been filmed, for the most part at her best- the trust gained by the director results in a disappointing peep into the horror of Lara's realisation of being HIV+ and having to face reality...
Throughout the director voices the film with a robotic-monotone type narration and the overall feeling is the product of college freshmen's first project of the first academic year.
Give it a watch, but it is by no means what you will expect it to be. I dare say the imagery I had in my head after seeing the trailer was far more dark and graphic than the actual content of the film...
AVPR: Aliens vs Predator - Requiem (2007)
0.1/10 - exceptionally f**king awful!! >:(
* IMDb doesn't allow 0 star ratings, but if it did, I'd gives AVPR one! I seen this thing 28 mins after it started... for some strange reason... (call it an inkling or whatever, but...) I doubt I missed anything spectacular.
The action sequences in this have to be the most badly filmed and executed ever for one movie. The camera and lighting is totally f'cked too. It's impossible to see who attacked who, what killed what. At times the cinematography is so bad you begin to giggle (at least I did :/ ) The human characters also have as much character as a single cell amoeba. Not one iota of emotion of humanity is evident in them the likes of which was portrayed in the vulnerable Ripley of the 1st 2 Alien movies. I cannot begin to express my disgust for this thing...
There's a scene where this dude and this chick are about to swim in this pool at night, then the local bullies come to break up the happy union- aliens do come into the pool... BUT, the cinematogrpahy was so bad I can't remember if they got killed or not. In fact, I can't call recall a single scene in my mind from this thing (I re frame from using 'movie' cuz it is non deserving), IT WAS THAT BAD.
When this thing ended (the government drops a bomb on the town, annihilating everything, and the human characters, if you wanna call em that escape in plane) I had to question what the f**k I had just seen. I've walked away from gross out teen sex comedies that have left me feeling more satisfied than this! Seriously, it's not worth your time watching, honestly, you'll just come to the same conclusions I did. The only reason you have to watch it is to reinforce what I've already stated here today. The ONLY OTHER reason you could possibly have is to see what the 'Alien-Predtaor' hybrid creature looks like... you can do this by searching keywords: alien predator hybrid on google images.
X-Men Origins: Wolverine (2009)
7.1/10
Unlike previous Marvel movies- Iron Man, The Hulk, Spiderman, yada yada, I enjoyed this one (as much as I did X-Men and X2) While not equal to the greatness of the first 2 X-Men movies, this one is definitely better by a mile than X-Men 3- The Last Stand.
My only quarm with it, is that some of the action sequences are poorly constructed in places, and the final battle is far fetched, over CGI'd, and not very believable.
There have not been many decent superhero movies in the 19 years. The first 2 Batman movies, the first 2 Blade movies, and the first 2 X-Men movies stand out as the only decent ones to date, in terms of original dynamic direction, production, style, and characterization; and while this movie isn't AS GOOD AS the aforementioned movies, it is pretty close. In terms of what one should expect from a decent superhero movie, this movie does just that- hell of a lot better than the lame family friendly mediocre fun of Spiderman and Iron Man. Pretty funny to see Van Wilder as a mutant...
My verdict: 7.1/10 - definitely worth a watch.
Body of Lies (2008)
3.7/10 boring, avoid
I watched this after hearing that Leonardo DiCaprio gets tortured in this. Well he does- gets a sledgehammer borough down on his hand twice, which isn't much.
Aside from that it has him and Russel Crowe (with an okayish southern yankee accent) meeting up and talking undercover this and that, then DiCaprio going back to the middle east. Lots of darkness and rubble and this that and the other, DiCaprio meets an Iranian girl (which at the start of the movie starts out as cheese), but doesn't bone her.
For the majority of the film I was bored sh'tless outta my mind, waiting for this torture scene I was told about, then when I seen it was crap- you don't even get to see what's going on cuz the camera is all over the place and the lighting too dark.
Boring, not worth the money or anything.
The Matrix Revolutions (2003)
5.5/10
This film was released the same year to get all the fans and masses into the theaters while the franchise was on a role, in order to make some record breaking ca$h.
The Matwix Revolutions feels like it's a prolonged durge/ after thought material leftover from the 2nd movie... I can't remember anything standout of the movie besides Smith and Neo's fight at the end, which must say that the majority of the film was filler. I enjoyed it more than Reloaded for some reason though.
So who thought that Keanu Reeves would loose his eyes and die at the end? I never did! It's a happy ending, but also a sad ending, and, it worked. Didn't feel forced or over baked with a symphonic orchestra on standby or anything! Good watch! Not a masterpiece, but a good action film all the same! :D
RocknRolla (2008)
3.9/10- crap
Gut Ritchie directed and wrote Lock, Stock and Snatch. Excellent films, razor sharp dialogue and electric cinematography, hugely international successful (and deservedly so)... for a long time Ritchie was the coolest, hippest director in the world... then he married Madona. If that wasn't bad enough, he then made an even worse mistake and made a film STARING MADONA- Swept Away. Swept Away marks the point at which Ritchie's career WAS SWEPT AWAY, lolz. His next movie 'Revolver,' had some funny dialogue and stuff in places, but overall felt forced, the script didn't flow naturally, and the plot was convoluted and unsure of itself, and overall the movie was crap.
Gangster maybe the only genre Ritchie can... past tense... HAS successfully directed. But there's nothing wrong with that if the movies are good, and Lock, Stock and Snatch are f-king great movies (not a lot of great movies out there also!) Anyway onto the rant- This movie absolutely... f-king crap! -the plot is convoluted and unengaging, the script has some good typical Ritchie wit in places but that doesn't save the rest of the films... characters are unengaging and lacking heavily in character, the pace of the film is really slow and boring (at times making you feel like your watching a Richard Curtis film with a 15-certificate). There's a fight'n'chase sequence between one of the boys and some Russain mobsters that's really entertaining, but not I can actually recall as being 'wasn't that great!' The subtitle at the end of the movie notes that 'the boys will return in the next rock'n'rolla film. So he's gonna make another one? -oh noes!!!!!! >.< Do I recommend this turd? YES- BUT ONLY TO PEOPLE WHO LIKED RITCHIE'S FIRST 2 FILMS. This is a very crap movie with a shiny production budget aimed at the people who liked his first 2 gangster movies, attemptedly written in the same tired mold as his other 3 gangster movies... 3.9/10 overall.
The Matrix Reloaded (2003)
5.3/10- okay sequel
The Matrix ain't my fave movie, but I'll review it anyway, real short and sweet...
I'm not a big fan of Hollywood movies. Most, like the Matrix are rip offs of Japanese animes. *The Matrix rips off Ghost In The Shell and Golgo 13, Van Helsing rips off Vampire Hunter D. Ben Stiller's character from Dodgeball is ripped from the Dragonball Z character Mr Satan (his film Zoolander rips off the Bret Easton Ellis novel 'Glamorama').
It's got a lot of explosions and fighting and this that and the other. I think the tried to cram so much into this one though, that at times you weren't able to focus properly on the performances or other aspects of the production... basically they must think that anything can look good if you film it with green tinted lenses! XD some of the sexy Hollywood glamorama crap really got on my tits too- like the scene where the Frenchman is talking philosophical bullsh't and then the camera goes into the black and green Matrix mode and zooms under the table up to a girl's crotch, and the scene where the token black sub-character gets back to his quarter and is about to say 'hey where my pus--' ssy, but then suddenly sees the women with the kids (I can imagine that one was intended to make audiences roar with laughter, though the effect is actually more cringe inducing).
5.3/10 -most action movies are crap mindless pieces of entertainment, made for the kind of people who listen to songs like 'Let The Bodies Hit The Floor,' who usually don't have a brain... that have people like Jean Claude Van Damme stuck in the straight to video industry, and a alcoholic, and Stallone staring in remakes of his own movies out of pure desperation for work. The Matrix offers a more creative approach to destruction, and has a lot of cool (slightly WTF) fight scenes that have been carefully orchestrated. In terms of originality though, it's nothing new...
The Matrix (1999)
6/10- okay sci-fi action movie
I remember seeing the posters for the Matrix plastered all over the place in the summer of 1999. It looked like just another action movie... and after seeing it, it IS really, but is just a little bit better than most mainstream action films.
Keanu Reeves is now Neo- every role he stars in is based on his icy soulless Neo character.
One of the reasons I hate the Matrix is because it rips off a lot of animes instead of being influenced by them (The most obvious is Ghost In The Shell and Golgo 13). The other is that between 1999-2004, it was the sworn god of all goth dickwads on the face of the planet.
All the actors in this movie, Reeves, Fishburne, the woman who plays Trinity, all of em I can't stand now, just because of all the hyperbole that was cemented into our heads to go see this film even if you've just been diagnosed with terminal cancer.
If ever I watch this movie, it's to remind me of the year 1999 and NOT to enjoy the brilliance of it, if there is any.
Hannibal Rising (2007)
3/10, on the same level as Red Dragon (2002) in terms of everything
I bought this DVD dirt cheap, and was expecting nothing extraordinary in terms of film making, and frankly couldn't think of f''k all else to watch! i WAS expecting this to be a biopic of the life of the fictional cannibal hannibal lector, up to the events of red dragon... it wasn't though... I have no idea if the book has more content or what, if not, it f''king should have, cuz this just seems like another silence of the lambs marketing trick. producers won't be happy until a franchise has been milked to the very last drop. the remake of Red Dragon wouldn't have been so disrespectful had it have been done properly, but it wasn't. actually this screenplay was wrote BY the hannibal lector creator Thomas harris himself... maybe he just should have sticked to writing the books? :/ this film tells of the life of hannibal lector as a young boy when his parents were killed by the nazi, and his sister eaten by the Nazis who captured him, and held up in snowbound lodge, UPTO- the point of where he's possibly in his mid 20's.
sometimes something can be so bad it's actually funny. alota people have said this movie is as funny as f''k cuz it's so bad, but i didn't think there was anything funny about it. hannibal kills around 5 people, all the killings are bland, and unimaginative... nothing like those in hannibal and silence of the lambs which make the view recoil in disgust and horror. for those anime fans out there reading this, hannibal actually uses a samurai sword to kill some of the 5 victims- (his aunt who takes him in turns out to be Japanese).
anything positive to say about this 3/10 film? - there is but one thing... when you first watch this you don't expect anything of the young guy playing hannibal whatsoever, then throughout the film you gradually begin to see the hannibal lector portrayed by Anthony hopkins appear- everything from his voice, to his facial expressions and body language is dead on target! i actually thought i was watching a young Anthony hopkins.
I reckon the guy's performance was let down by the bland shiny production values and brain dead Hollywood style story telling. overall 3.1/10.
Worth a watch? - no not really. Q: Even if I can't think of anything else to watch? A: Yeah, just avoid it.
Captivity (2007)
2.1/10 - daft, yawn...
It's very rare I enjoy many movies, as 98.9% of all titles released as crapola. i never enjoyed the hostel movies, cuz i understood why they'd been put out- for young people to relieve the anger of been bullied and mentally abused by older people, trying to manifest how a youth who is been preyed upon by someone older feels. while i can understand it, it still disgusted me. BUT that's what horror movies are all about- to disgust, shock and repulse... to leave you with an uneasy feeling that something lurks in the shadows, to let your paranoid imagination run away with itself, to be afraid to turn off the lights, to be mentally scared by a piece of cinema so horrific you never thought it possible- THAT... IS A HORROR MOVIE... and there aren't many of them. On the horror rictor scale, Hostel parts 1 & 2 was around 7.3/10... this movie seems to be influenced by 3 horror movies- * Hostel * Saw and * Scream Q: And does it do so in a skillful dynamic way? -one that is ubber cool? A: It most certainly... DOES NOT. What we have here is a half-assed movie idea that was put together by 2 producers who saw Saw and Hostel as successful horror movies, of which the screenplay redrafted 66 times, and used as a coffee mat for several months. Most of the time studios ARE NOT influenced by a movie but try to copy it, without making the reproduction too obvious. Think of Transformers that came out in 1984, then think of Go-Gobots (that wanted to be Transformers so darn bad it wasn't even a joke) released a few years later... well that's what this movie is like.
The heroine in the movie comes across as a porn star who's just stepped off a cum splattered set and into a mainstream movie. There doesn't appear to be any passion there or real acting or anything... she's just there as a mindless blonde meat rack (kinda like Paris Hiton). She could easily be some girl that just finished her 3 year in college, went to Hollywood, and worked her way into the Hollywood community with her blonde hair and female features. So if you were hoping for some tormented, scared, paranoid Sidney Prescot, you're in for a big disappointment.
There are so many pot holes and what not in this movies you begin to loathe it with a passion. There's a twist towards the end of the film that had the potential to make me start paying close attention, but then it just fell on it's ass and showed itself for the half baked, badly written, re-written several times in places turd that it was.
The serial killer comes across as an extra reject from one of the clients in the Hostel movies (and looks like the fat one out of the not so funny MTV2 comedy band Tenacious D).
There is also some comedy in this movie (whether or not you're meant to laugh at it I have no idea)...
The majority of the movie is spent with the heroine wandering around in her cell and being gassed repetitively... not to the degree that it leaves you bitting your tails in suspense, but more like 'when the f''k is this movie gonna end so I can slate it!?!' The torture scenes also... there's about 3 of them, all really minimal, low budget, badly written, and totally unimaginative. There's just the one... THAT MADE ME LAUGH... at the start we see the heroine drink a veggie smoothie or something like like in her plush apartment, then when she wakes up in the torture chair, the killer puts various bloody body parts from his fridge into a blender and forces her to drink the blended bloody slop. It's wrong that I laughed, but IT REALLY WAS FUNNY. The other torture scenes are some girl getting dissolved in an acid shower on a video, the heroine's dog getting blown apart by a shot gun, and someone looses their tooth. REALLY REALLY DULL.
Q: And is it scary? A: Not at all.
Notorious (2009)
average biographic movie of dead-rappa
Movie based on the life of Biggie Smalls.
Without sounding racist, the number #1 person this movie will appeal to is young black youths. i seen the movie at the theater, and there were only 2 other white people there- the rest were black kids aged 15-23 I'd say- most of em laughed whenever Biggie Smalls said something that the film makers intended to be funny.
it was okay- had all the shiny bland production values of a typical Hollywood movie, failed to portray life as gritty and shitty like it is, but I've seen a lot worse. i'm sure this guy went through a lot more sh't to get to the top though... this movie makes it look like becoming a super star is a walk in the park (which can be said for A lot of movies), and we all know the answer to that...
there's not much to say about the performances and story, as most people can probably guess the flow of the movie before it even starts- Biggie Smalls roses from the gutter in Brooklyn to rappa super stardom, then got shot by west coast gangsters in 1997- so it's pretty easy to conceive of what happens in the film based on the semantics of a usual Hollywood biography.
4.8/10- nothing special, but worth a watch if you've nothing to do
I Know Who Killed Me (2007)
3.7/10 - just another horror
Before I begin my rant, I don't think this Lindsey Lohan girl is particularly standout attractive or anything. she comes across as the hardcore social bitch who would f''k all her male friends (a'holes, freshmen, whoever) and perhaps do some girl-on-girl action if she got drunk enough... and she has a nice voice, but that's about it.
this movie opens up like a scream/i know what you did last summer type of horror. later it goes for visceral not for the squeamish horror scenes the likes of which you see in Hostel and The Texas Chainsaw Masacre. later it turns into a kinda head-fcuk movie and your not sure if the character is in a dream, on drugs or what, THEN after that it becomes this supernatural/horror, and attempts to sloppy touch on pseudo-intellectualism, and there's plenty of plot twists folks! BUT not fight club/ memento, more like 'laugh out out, that was f''kin some sloppy sh't right there!' the plot is very convoluted, and has been knocked up real quick. there are visions of what the serial killer is like who talks non sensical BS that's somehow meant to be a clue or something to the overall plot?? So, 3.7/10. watch it if you've have absolutely nothing to do, or like gang bang actresses like this Lindsey Lohan.
Gummo (1997)
5.7/10
Wrote and directed by the same guy who wrote Bully and Kids.
While the writer quotes 'Larry Clarke is a f''king pedophile,' I cant help but feel Clarke's direction is superior to this Harmony Karmone's. Clarke is viewed negatively because he shows too much erotic shots of teen's bodies in his movies. i don't think this is perverted, but is there to showcase what youth is all about, which is 'sex.' it's not put out as child porn or out of the director's own lusts.
if you hate rednecks and hicks and people from the south in general, and love to see em ripped on, this movie is for you because that's exactly what it aims to do! the problem with it though is that it's too short. this guy aims to direct in a way that makes life look sh't, but it a somewhat beautiful, mystical way. after seeing this, I'm not sure i have any incentive to visit the south. i try not to believe stereotypes are true, but through experience, i have discovered 75% of the time these preconceptions with people from different parts of the country or what not are actually true.
anyway, 5.7/10- not as good as Kids or Bully, but it's wrote by the same guy, so if you liked Kids or Bully, then you probably have to see this!
The Day the Earth Stood Still (2008)
some interesting ideas, but ultimately it sucked
i watched this movie based on all the negative feedback i heart about it. it started off interesting- it's got this *SPOILER- huge guardian cyborg protecting keanu, that later in the movie comes apart into millions upon millions of microscopic robotic locust like creatures that consumes every material object they come into contact with. But it turned dull real quick.
there wasn't enough character development, or coverage of the aliens or their origions. keanu is like this really dull boring starman for the 21st century. this movie would have been better suited as a straight to video release (With not so many special FX & CGI jazz)... which you could find repeated regularly on some crappy cable channel like zone sc-fi or horror or something. I'm sure even a b-movie actor on a salary of $150k could deliver a more interesting performance than Neo (aka Keanu Reeves) the movie ended really abruptly also. keanu reeves redeems his role as the savior of the human race, 'Neo', in almost every movie he does (is kinda funny). keanu's acting is on a similar level to schwatzenegger's all he has to do is turn up, be himself and at the most, act icy cold.
so yeah on the whole this movie sucked. i give it 4/10 for some of the creature designs and ideas. not worth watching though, it'll just leave you feeling depressed at the end of it (not because it's a beautiful sad melancholy piece of work, but because of how badly written the thing is, and also for Keanu reprising his role as Neo for like the 9th time now.
The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor (2008)
rubbish, don't watch 2/10
this movie was crap crap crap
started out interesting, but then you saw it for what it was- a poorly constructed piece of douche. the introduction of the main characters was as poor as anything I've seen. just godamn terrible. the dough musta been good though for brendon fraser to come back on the set after 8 years (or he had absolutely nothing else in the pipeline)
switched off after 20 mins. i switched off that movie where eddie murphy plays a robotic alien body host to small aliens called 'dave' something after 10 mins. if your not grabbed by a movie within the first 10 mins of then it usually means it's no good bull crap.
avoid, do something better with your time.
Dead or Alive: Hanzaisha (1999)
really violent Japanese cops VS Yakuza movie
Directed by the same guy who did Ichi The Killer, this is about as violent as Japanese movies get (not that that's a bad thing, cuz Japanese crime rate is actually pretty low, and the Japs are pretty mature when it comes to making art out of sex and violence).
Lots of blood, gore, unexpected twists (that don't seem intentional), and a tad of homosexual/homoerotica thrown in just for the hell of it).
The ending was kinda messed up (maybe there's an intellectual answer of it somewhere :/ ) and left me thinking 'WTF.'
*Your comment does not contain enough lines - the minimum length for comments is 10 lines of text.
-- whoops! Okay, here ya go--> Japanese ultra violence late 90s 1999 death kill yakuza cops VS takashi miike homosexuality samurai spirit a tad screwed up alternative
Scary Movie (2000)
post 2000's American humor
The Scary Movie serious parodies movies and celebrities and pop culture of the moment.
The thing I find funny about this movie is this- I like to put it on and laugh AT it, thinking 'this is the kinda crap America actually thinks is funny.' Crap, but not the worst work from the guys who gave us Meet The Spartans and Disaster Movie.
The sequel to this though is soo bad you can't even laugh AT it.
5.1/10.
Whoops! *Your comment does not contain enough lines - the minimum length for comments is 10 lines of text.
Okay, how about this- crap American humor sex comedy dumb stupid not really that funny brain dead mindless entertainment for the masses wassuppp wass aaaaaappppp does that fill enough space IMDb?
Mallrats (1995)
this American stoner crap ain't funny
I don't see what's so great about this Kevin Smith. This movie ain't funny at all, in fact I was having a hard time trying to acknowledge the crap in this film that I thought I was meanta find funny based upon all the positive hoopla I've heard surrounding it.
Maybe you have to smoke marijuana or drugs to find it funny? :/ , kinda like Adult Swim animations.
2/10 cuz some parts of the movie are really colourful and that. Has the fat guy who played Bulk in Power Rangers (remember em? Go go Power Rangers etc, kids actually bought it too? XD )
** Your comment does not contain enough lines - the minimum length for comments is 10 lines of text.
-- whoops! Okay, here ya go ----> American stoner crap comedy not funny absolutely not funny makes you cringe tongue in cheek college stoner garbage kevin smith is god NOT 1995 mid 90s American USA USA USA Jerry Springer wouldn't wanna see this film again ever
Boogie Nights (1997)
average watch, but full of Hollywood influence
This movie is meant to have been influenced by the life of porn star John Holmes/Johny Wadd, and the character played by Marky Walburger dude in the movie, Dirk Diggler, was actually a real life well-endowed porn star himself. The 2003 movie 'Wonderland,' which is actually based on the life story of John Holmes and his connection to the Wonderland Murders in LA (which WAS a true story), I seen before Boogie Nights, and I can honestly say it is M I L E S better and more realistic than this movie.
Mark Walberg is just another douche actor to me the likes of Matt Damon or some douche like that. But yeah, the movie is okay or a watch but the structure of it is very close to the foundations of most Hollywood films. Imagine any old Hollywood movie about a guy rising to the top from a young age who just decides 'f''k it,' and then you have the success, and all the lights and ladies and this that and the other, then things start to go down hill (Hollywood is always bad at capturing this and good at censoring cold hard reality) and you have some of the character's lives going pear shaped, but then in the end everything works out happy. Oh yeah, and a the end, Marky Walberger gets his penis out while talking to himself infront of the mirror (obviously it is fake) and that is the point in the movie where we're all meant to laugh, only it's NOT that funny.
5.0/10 being generous.
Hellboy II: The Golden Army (2008)
not as good as the first one, really lame, nothing special
I seen the first movie on a plane when it came out. Was okay, ot excellent but not bad as far as superhero movies go these days.
This one was really lame though- didn't like it at all... bored the hell outta me. Is made to be idiot friendly like most mainstream films. 3.0/10 (I give it 3 because of the special effects and make up here and there).
Overall I don't recommend this depressingly mediocre crud to you at all. Go to the super bowl or do something more rewarding with your time, I regret ever having watched this title, and wish for my memory of it to be erased.
Borat: Cultural Learnings of America for Make Benefit Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan (2006)
4.5/10 -meh
Sacha Baron Cohen has been doing this robotic retarded Borat crap ever since 1999 (Ali G first appeared on 11'o'clock show in Britain in 1998, Borat character was introduced as part of the 'Ali G Show' round about 1999/2000... that' roughly 7 years of Borat... and Sacha uses the same lines and catch phrases in every sketch to he point of where you're wanting the character axed) ... if you've followed Sacha Baron Cohen ever since the late 90's, see pretty much all of his sh't, then this is just gonna seem like a waste of your time.
The highlight of this movie for me was where he went to a Rodeo in Texas and aimed to insult every American in the place, then the horse carrying the American flag falls over on it's ass.
4.5/10 -meh... would have given it a higher rating had he used new material, but he doesn't just recycles the same sh't to the point of where he's ny-on robotic.
Within (2005)
5.6/10 -good horror
When you fist put this movie on, right from the start, you can see that it's not gonna be a masterpiece or anything, (and we see a bunch of supposedly average college students that look like they're gonna get cut the f''k up from someone or something later in the movie) but it does pretty much what you'd expect from a horror... it (half) scares you. It has all the qualities that people look for in movie- fear of the unknown, darkness, gore, etc.
Anyway (without spoiling too much) I gave it 5.6/10. Not one the best movies ever put out, but in terms of scary on the rictor scale, it's 7 miles scarier than Jason X!
Laurel Canyon (2002)
Rated PG for 'Patronising Gush'
For some reason I knew exactly what was gonna happen after the first 15 minutes... I predicted all of it scene by scene...
What prompted me to borrow this was the fact that it had Christian Bale in it, and secondly judging from the cover it looked like it had some MILF love triangle thing going on. This film was part of the official selection for the... Cannes, Sundannce, and Toronto Film Festivals (so it sez on th DVD cover)... guess they had to chose some crap... while its not the worst of the worst, it did indeed suck...5.2/10.
If you like Christian Bale, and swinging rock MILFs getting it on with your girlfriend, then it's worth a watch, but only if you have absolutely nothing to do, and/or can't find a better film...
The Dark Knight (2008)
7.4/10 - so it wasn't douche
I didn't really like Batman Begins... Batman has been commercial ever since the first movie in 1989, everyone from your granny to the school janitor knows how batman 'became.' To me it was just another excuse to sell Batman and make more money, regardless of how good the direction was.
Well, I DIDN'T think The Dark Knight was douche, but I still prefer the 1989 Batman by Tim Burton over this one. No disrespect to the late Heath Ledger either, BUT I did prefer Jack Nicholson's Joker over Ledger's. I found, at times, Ledger's Joker, overly dark and annoying. I liked Two Face though- they made a really good job of that; MILES better than Tommy Lee Jone's Two-Face. MILES. Was a shame to see him get ****** instead of The Joker.
At times Batman's voice was hard to make out what he was saying, and, towards the end, got kinda amusing to hear. Michael Caine was a terrible Alfred... I hate all this 'lets put an English sidekick in here to spill one liner after the hero explains or cracks something. Every time I see Caine I just think of camp 60's movies and the Italian Jobs, in the same way that I see Christian Bale in a suit and think of American Psycho. I like Bale's Bruce Wayne, but only because of his powerful role in American Psycho. To me, Chistian Bale in Batman, is Patrick Bateman dressed up as Batman XD.
Sometimes the story moves a little too fast to keep up with (which wouldn't be a problem for the people that have growing up watching Batman movies'n'cartoons), but the average person would perhaps get confused.
7.4/10- Overall.
Ali G Indahouse (2002)
very funny...
I don't think acting to a high standard was required for this film, it's a comedy, and shouldn't be taken seriously. The idea is that you laugh, as opposed to getting all critical over how it's not a propper film without oscar winning acting. I take my hat off to Sacha Baron Cohen for getting his own film. If there were more people like Sacha Baron Cohen in the world, it would be a better place for better, or..for badder. If you can laugh at serious things like unemployment or politics, these things become less threating to you if you confront them at some point in your life.