Steave Reviews

The Love Butcher (1975)

One of the most delightfully awful films I've ever seen

[11 November 1999]

I've seen this movie many times, and I still like to watch it. This movie is beyond bad. I love it.

The plot is a sad mutation of a very very popular thriller. The acting is so bad at times The "action" in this movie is awesome. The "Love Butcher" kills all of his victims (all female, of course) with garden implements. Accomplishing this modus operandi could take quite a bit of doing, particularly if the urge to murder comes while indoors. This is not a problem for our killer, though. In his world, people keep hoes and rakes near the fireplace.

There are some great lines, atrocious dub-ins, and druken edits. Add to this a deliciously lame disco-era feel, and you've got a winner.

If you're a connesieur of bad films, you have to see this one.

Star Wars: Episode I - The Phantom Menace (1999)

Great show, but someone forgot to write a story first

[7/10 · 21 May 1999]

It is nearly impossible to talk about this movie adequately without divulging plot details. Therefore, this discussion may be somewhat cryptic.

Being a big fan of the Star Wars universe, although not a die-hard, I expected a really good movie, but I kept my expectations low. Good thing I did.

There were many things I did like. Lucas and his team have a keen visual sense and an unparalleled ability to create interesting creatures and places. The fight sequences were excellent. The movie should have had more of them.

The story itself, however, was a few shades less than thrilling. There is almost no character development. The story meanders around without actually making you care very much about the characters. I feel this is a key mistake. Further, the actual "plot" was unengaging. The plot elements themselves were almost arbitrary and seemed to have been picked to fit scene ideas, rather than the scenes following the plot.

The only plot element I will divulge is one I think everyone knows about anyway. The "Big Race". Part "Grease" and part "Ben Hur". Great visuals, but completely ridiculous. Sometimes, a nod to a well-known plot element is a neat thing, other times it just seems ill-conceived and lazy. It gets far worse, but I'll let you discover on your own what I mean Suffice it to say that the conflict resolution is amazingly bad on several different levels.

As far as the "humor" goes, Lucas takes us to undiscovered plateaus of cartoonish sickly-sweet cute in an attempt to illicit cheap laughs. We know there has to be a cute character in there to provide comic relief, but if you *must* have one, at least make him a little more entertaining or at least don't make him stick out like a sore muppet thumb.

With the exception of the kid who played Anakin, the actors were exceptional. Their gifts were largely wasted on middle-school dialogue and schizophrenic turns of emotion.

Having said all that, there was enough in the movie to make a Star Wars fan such as myself have a good time. There were many truly exciting parts, and frankly I can't get enough. So, go see the movie -- you'll probably enjoy it. Just don't expect a good story or to be as emotionally involved as you were while watching the previous three Star Wars films.

The Waterboy (1998)

Check your brain, then get ready to laugh

[9/10 · 5 December 1998]

A lot of people are shocked at how dumb, unbelievable, and campy this movie is. Obviously they've lived in a cave and never seen an Adam Sandler movie before.

You don't watch Adam Sandler for a cerebral workout. You'll never see him starring opposite Anthony Hopkins or Merryl Streep. Okay, I realize his IS cast opposite Oscar-Winner Kathy Bates, but don't confuse me with details. This movie is just a bunch of jokes wrapped around a weak plot.

Still, the jokes are really funny. I don't usually laugh out loud at the movies, but I guffawed at many parts of this movie. If nothing else, it stimulates the Three Stooges area of the frontal lobe of your brain.

On the down side, Rob Schneider must be a good friend, because his role was obviously a last-minute toss in. Schneider is not funny in this movie and his "lines" are by far the campiest element of this movie.

Still, it was amazing how the crowd with which I saw it reacted to the football scenes in the movie. I looked around and everyone was anxious or cheering like they're best friend was playing in the Super Bowl. Also, this is the hardest I've seen an audience laugh since "There's Something About Mary".

In short, if you can accept the fact that the plot is completely unbelievable and just watch it for laughs, you will enjoy this movie. If you're looking for Oscar-winning drama, go elsewhere.