Keltic-2 Reviews

Essex Boys (2000)

Competent, but nothing special

[5/10 · 1 November 2001]

It shouldn't have mattered, but it did. Every time I saw Tom Wilkinson, I thought "Gerald Cooper" (_Full Monty_), not "John Dyke". Just couldn't take him seriously as a hard man. Similarly, Sean Bean, who I normally find very entertaining, was only lukewarm in his portrayal of the psychotic gangster.

I really wanted to like _Essex Boys_, being a big fan of gangster cinema, but it just didn't do it for me. Nothing stands out as particularly bad, but equally nothing stands out as particularly fresh or original either. It seems fairly standard for British crime films to be less manic and slower-paced than their American counterparts, but _Essex Boys_, for whatever reason, didn't have that spark that makes an interesting and memorable film.

Tale of the Mummy (1998)

Excruciatingly slow

[2/10 · 27 October 2001]

_Talos_ is excruciatingly slow-paced. For a film that is supposedly horror, this is the kiss of death. The special effects are in general rather poor, and for a large portion of the far-too-long running time we are treating to the spectacle of people being chased and killed by demonic rags that look remarkably like moving toilet paper.

The Waterdance (1992)

Complex, powerful, moving

[9/10 · 16 February 2001]

_Waterdance_ explores a wide variety of aspects of the life of the spinally injured artfully. From the petty torments of faulty fluorescent lights flashing overhead to sexuality, masculinity and depression, the experience of disability is laid open.

The diversity of the central characters themselves underscores the complexity of the material examined - Joel, the writer, Raymond, the black man with a murky past, and Bloss, the racist biker. At first, these men are united by nothing other than the nature of their injuries, but retain their competitive spirit. Over time, shared experience, both good and bad, brings them together as friends to support one another.

Most obvious of the transformations is that experienced by Joel, who initially distances himself from his fellow patients with sunglasses, headphones and curtains. As he comes to accept the changes that disablement has made to his life, Joel discards these props and begins to involve himself in the struggles of the men with whom he shares the ward.

The dance referred to in the title is a reference to this daily struggle to keep one's head above water; to give up the dance is to reject life. _Waterdance_ is a moving and powerful film on many levels, and I do not hesitate to recommend it.

Vampyros Lesbos (1971)

Slow, plodding and dull

[3/10 · 16 February 2001]

Usually, what you're looking for in a horror movie is horror. _Vampyros Lesbos_ fails to deliver in a big way.

The soundtrack is intrusive and jarringly mismatched to the action, such as it is, and each character appears to have selected at the outset the expression that he or she is to wear for the remainder of the film.

In essence, there is very little here to recommend, or to salvage the film from interminable boredom and chronic confusion. Abrupt editing does nothing to aid comprehension; frequent recourse to gratuitous lesbian erotica, similarly, adds nothing to the film as a whole.

Vacant Possession (1995)

More questions than answers

[8/10 · 14 February 2001]

_Vacant Possession_ explores some fairly common ground as the death of a mother brings a daughter home to Sydney, where the old family home begins to bring old wounds more and more to life. Initially, the flashback sequences are well defined, but as the story unfolds they become more and more seamlessly blended with the present.

There is little here that hasn't been covered numerous times in other films, although it is possible to read the film as a metaphor for the history of white Australia. Ultimately, however, _Vacant Possession_ leaves more questions unanswered than answered.

The Night of the Hunted (1980)

Aimless and unsatisfying

[4/10 · 10 February 2001]

Amnesiac women who remove their clothes at the drop of a hat (or a blouse?) are about the only stand-out points in a film that is otherwise slow and aimless. Although the basic premise of the story offers a wealth of possibilities, they are never developed to any satisfying degree, and exposition is almost non-existent. A large proportion of the film is mere wanderings through the corridors of a multi-storied clinic/hospital. The overall effect is bleak and sterile, a la THX-1138.

Killer Condom (1996)

If warped humour is your thing, this is for you

[6/10 · 28 November 2000]

-Kondom des Grauens- is an odd beast. Although at times outlandish to the point of absurdity, it is always played pretty much straight. The wonderfully gruff and sleazy Detective Luigi Macaroni is a great parody of every hard-boiled detective ever portrayed. Overall it's worth at least a look, although definitely not everyone's cup of tea. It sits nicely somewhere between -Bad Taste- and -Eat and Run-.

The Indecent Woman (1991)

Sex, danger and eroticism - a heady brew

[8/10 · 27 November 2000]

_The Indecent Woman_ draws out several themes, among them the tension between the desire to loosen restraints and the fear of losing control. Emilia, the central character, muses at one point that "fantasies are so contradictory", which captures the mood of the film perfectly. The potential for an individual to lose him or herself in desire is a key issue as the story unwinds.

There are several much more explicit scenes, but keep an eye out for the "shadow foreplay" sequence, which is perhaps the most tense and erotic sequence in the film. Later, the shadows resurface, this time as a threat, mirroring the progressive change in the relationship between Emilia and Leon.

Spawn (1997)

Just another revenge flick with some nifty effects

[5/10 · 24 October 2000]

In the end analysis, this is merely yet another revenge film with some flashy effects. The special effects themselves are fairly uniformly well done, with the exception of Satan who is without a doubt the worst effect of the film.

There were several elements that I personally found very distracting and annoying that made me suspect that _Spawn_ was made with a very unsophisticated and even cinema-illiterate audience in mind. The snippets of expository narration and, more importantly, constant use of flashbacks to underscore important plot points became irritating fairly early in the piece. More generally, the movie had an MTV feel, as though it was one long rock video, complete with flashing (and illegible) credits.

_Spawn_ is worth seeing for the effects, but not much else.

The Craft (1996)

Lots of eye candy, but not much else

[5/10 · 24 October 2000]

Given the scope offered by the subject material, _The Craft_ was disappointingly unimaginative, although the uses the young witches put their powers to are probably a fair representation of the ends a teenager might find for magic. Apart from a few glamour spells, petty revenges and several spectacular temper tantrums, none of the four young ladies stretches her powers to any great extent.

There are some subtle and interesting undertones relating to female subjectivity and relationships (most of the male characters being either cardboard cut-outs and/or pawns for the females), but on the whole _The Craft_ falls rather flat.

Redneck Zombies (1989 Video)

Really, really bad... but not in a good way

[2/10 · 24 October 2000]

Even for a Troma Film, this one is bad. Shot on video, it makes no pretence at being serious in any way; the acting is dreadful and the special effects just...aren't that special. Most of the budget seems to have gone into fake blood, mock intestines and various snot-like substances to be oozed or spewed by zombies. This isn't necessarily a bad thing, but unlike other Troma films this one just doesn't get there. There are a few humorous moments, such as the autopsy carried out by a veterinary student under the influence of acid, but in general the jokes fall flat.

Two-Lane Blacktop (1971)

Very male piece of cinema

[4/10 · 24 October 2000]

"What is this, some kind of masculine power trip?"

The girl who chooses to ride with the two young car fanatics in their rambling across the United States sums up this film perfectly.

No need for intimacy here, no need for names or anything but a good fast car and a stretch of blacktop to race on. This is a very masculine film about a very masculine subculture.

Like the three central characters, the plot is aimless and seems to drift like a beer can on the waves. The race to Washington, which seems at first to be of overriding importance, seems to peter out as the movie progresses; the issue never seems to be decided. There's some fairly obvious derivations from such road and drifter movies as _The Wild One_, but for a film about road racing there's precious little tension or excitement here.

The Lodger: A Story of the London Fog (1927)

Competent silent thriller from the master of suspense

[8/10 · 14 July 2000]

_The Lodger_ is a competent thriller that demonstrates that the touch of the master, Alfred Hitchcock, was developing even early in his career. There are narrative and cinematographic elements present here that appear in his later works in much more refined form.

Two shots in particular demonstrate a willingness to experiment with special effects. One shows the title character pacing in his room from beneath through a transparent floor. The second shows the memories of a police detective by means of a flashback that takes place within the confines of a footprint in the dirt. Interestingly, during a kissing scene there is a breach of the 180 degree rule; it is difficult to determine if this was intended, or merely a goof.

Aside from the major narrative, which concerns the search for the serial killer, the Avenger, there is an interesting subtext that involves the romantic attachments of the daughter of the lodger's landlords, who vacillates between the "safe" but strait-laced police detective and the "dangerous" but exciting lodger.

The Cold Summer of 1953 (1988)

Humanity survives even in exile

[9/10 · 13 July 2000]

Grainy stock gives this film an almost documentary feel and has the additional effect of underscoring the dismal state of the trading outpost at which most of the events take place. _The Cold Summer of 1953_ is more authentic and less hysterical than _Gulag_, although it makes the same points with regards the social standing (or, more accurately, the complete lack of social standing) of political prisoners in postwar Russia. Looked down upon by even the most violent of criminals, the two political exiles still maintain a sense of dignity and, to some extent, honour, in the face of their privations.

Ghosts... of the Civil Dead (1988)

Powerful, bloody and important

[9/10 · 13 July 2000]

The title says it all. When a person is convicted of a crime, he or she becomes, at least temporarily (and, in certain situations and locations, permanently) dead to civil society. The men we see here are mere shadows.

_Ghosts of the Civil Dead_ is as topical now as it was when first released as a study in the ways that fear of crime may be exploited to justify oppression. Only in two or three scenes is overt violence shown, yet the movie manages to maintain a sense of menace for the full duration. As repression within the prison becomes increasingly harsh and the few remnants of civilian life that the prisoners have retained are stripped away, it becomes increasingly obvious that there can be no resolution.

In the current climate of law and order rhetoric, _Ghosts of the Civil Dead_ remains a powerful reminder as to where this rhetoric may lead.

Once Upon a Time in China II (1992)

Enjoyable blend of fiction and history with a Wushu kick

[7/10 · 12 July 2000]

Set in the early twentieth century amidst civil unrest and nationalist demands for independence, _Once Upon a Time in China II_ is enjoyable and very watchable. Much is made of the clash between Oriental and Occidental culture and the lack of understanding between the two. Comparisons between superstitious, reactionary Chinese nationalism and its more educated counterpart are made in passing.

_Once Upon a Time in China II_ is very similar in feel and approach to such adventure films as _Raiders of the Lost Ark_, and is probably best viewed as such. Although fictional and real-life events and characters are interwoven, it is doubtful that the film was ever intended as anything but enjoyable viewing.

A Chinese Ghost Story III (1991)

Those beautiful Chinese ghosts are at it again!

[7/10 · 12 July 2000]

If the movies are to be believed, Chinese ghosts are much prettier and more mischievous than their Western counterparts. The storylines of the three 'Chinese Ghost' films are largely identical, but the direction is excellent and the detail and colour is such that it's not a huge problem. As always, humour is an integral part of the film, accompanied, of course, by a great deal of mugging. For those who haven't encountered the 'Chinese GhostStory' trilogy yet, this film offers an interesting departure from the Western horror/ghost genre; for those who have, another enjoyable romp in the Chinese ghost world.

Passage à l'acte (1996)

Incisive study of psychoanalysis and its dynamics

[8/10 · 11 July 2000]

'Death in Therapy' is a rather engaging thriller in which a psychoanalyst, Dr Riviere, is drawn into an uncertain world of danger and violence as he attempts to determine whether his patient, Berg, is telling the truth when he announces in therapy that he murdered his wife and got away with it.

The narrative belies an understanding that the "patient" is not merely a passive object of analysis, but an actively engaged subject, and in the process of demonstrating the amount of control that Berg is able to exert over his analyst 'Death in Therapy' also makes some pointed observations with regards to the largely classificatory nature of psychiatry and its "professional detachment". To some extent, this point is underlined by Berg himself; in contrast, Riviere's other patients are seen as dull, neurotic, even comedic for Riviere.

An interesting film which raises many pertinent questions.

Lipstick (1960)

Authentic and enjoyable

[8/10 · 10 July 2000]

From the opening shots until the closing sequence, _Il Rossetto_ has the gritty feel of reality. This realism is generated by the use of grainy black and white stills as a background for the initial credits, is bolstered by the discussions of a group of worldly young girls, and is thereafter maintained for the duration in a seamy world of grifters, police, hookers and poverty.

The male lead, Pierre Brice, brings to the screen the same suave arrogance and sinister menace that a young Robert Wagner brought to a similar role in _A Kiss Before Dying_. The young female lead (Laura Vivaldi) is, similarly, very believable as an adolescent whose good character is cast into disrepute by the sexist assumptions of the police, her mother and others involved in the murder case.

Bloody Pit of Horror (1965)

Yet another killer on the loose in a creepy castle

[2/10 · 9 July 2000]

The plot itself has, of course, been done countless times since the beginning of film: a group of celebrities spend a night in a castle with a bad reputation and a dubious history. Of course, once they are safely locked in for the night, the killing begins. Various secret passages and spyholes, a surly owner and a lurking servant who looks more like a sailor than a butler complete the stereotype. As an example of the genre, _The Crimson Executioner_ doesn't really offer anything that stands out, apart from some creative innovations in the field of torture. Comic relief comes from the ineffectual weakling photographer and from the Executioner himself, who looks, in the words of Des Mangan (Australian cult movie fanatic) like a 'condom full of walnuts' and who has some of the most over the top and (probably unintentionally) hilarious lines you're likely to hear.

The Uncanny (1977)

Good concept, but poor execution

[4/10 · 7 July 2000]

This is the film for anyone who's ever felt that cats are a lot smarter and more sinister than they might let on. Unfortunately, it's not very good. The ideas themselves are actually quite good, but they are dragged down by poor performances and some excruciatingly bad special effects

The Apple (1998)

A slice of contemporary Iranian life

[8/10 · 6 July 2000]

_Sib_ offers a glimpse inside Iranian society that is rarely available to Western audiences. It looks and feels like a documentary, and apparently contains actual footage of the freeing of the twin girls who had been confined to the family home for their entire lives.

The blossoming of the two girls, which begins almost the moment that they are chased from the yard by a well-meaning but rather overbearing social worker, is a joy to behold. The scene in which the recently-freed twins steal ice creams from a young street vendor stands out as an example of the comedy that lightens a film that could, given a different treatment, have been relentlessly depressing. As the narrative develops, the father may be seen as a prisoner in his own right, trapped by his traditionalist religious beliefs, his fears for his daughters' safety and by the surprisingly domineering influence of his blind wife. Ultimately, _Sib_ shows that the forced release of the twins is also a release for their father, the nominal villain of the piece.

Shanghai Grand (1996)

Film noir, Hong Kong style

[8/10 · 6 July 2000]

_Shanghai Grand_ is a beautifully filmed period gangster film set in, as the title might suggest, Shanghai. It's a very dark film with a film noir feel, gritty and, at times, graphically violent. The use of silent movie style placards to introduce different "chapters" in the film is novel and helps anchor _Shanghai Grand_ in the period in which it is set.

As is the case with many Honkonese films, themes of love, betrayal, honour and duty intertwine to create a complex and interesting plot; careful composition and cinematography add to the mix to make _Shanghai Grand_ a very proficient and worthwhile experience.

The Pillow Book (1995)

Sex as Text and Language as Intimacy

[7/10 · 5 July 2000]

_The Pillow Book_ isn't for everyone. In visual terms, the adjective that comes to mind is "busy". For a significant proportion of the film, there is more than one "screen" to pay attention to, with almost constant use of various overlays, inserts and other optical effects, as well as black and white flashback sequences. These effects add up to a rather dreamlike sensation as the film drifts from one image to the next. However, over time they do become somewhat distracting.

In terms of narrative, _The Pillow Book_ raises and explores many questions regarding the interrelations between sexuality and textuality; the pleasures of the flesh and the pleasures of literature, which are described at one point as the two great pleasures, here become one. Calligraphy becomes a means of intimacy, love and sexual pleasure, and the human body becomes the parchment for a literary work of art. Intriguing material that will keep an engaged viewer thinking for hours.

Kanto Wanderer (1963)

An authentically Japanese Yakuza film

[8/10 · 4 July 2000]

_Kanto Wanderer_ is a very different film to more contemporary Yakuza movies, such as _Black Rain_. Rather than focusing on the action, _Kanto Wanderer_ examines in depth the motivation and ethics of Yakuza members, in particular those of the young gangster Katsuta. The Yakuza ethic is of prime importance to this young man - he is, in fact, derided by an older member as being too traditional. Whilst examining Katsuta's efforts to remain faithful to the old ways in a changing world, the viewer is treated to a very low-key look inside Yakuza business, including several scenes of card-sharping, Japanese style.

Visually, the film is quite beautiful, with meticulously balanced composition and very effective use of colour. The latter is particularly noticeable with reference to banners and signs (which appear in a great many scenes), and in the skilful use of contrast - bright colours which stand out against white flags in the background, for example. One scene in which two gangsters are killed in a gambling house perhaps uses of colour to the greatest effect and impact, as well as blending diegetic and non-diegetic visual elements seamlessly.