Mom (TV Series)
Pork Loin and a Beat-up Monte Carlo (2018)
Anna Faris: Christy Plunkett
Photos
Quotes
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Christy : [rehearsing her argument] Am I moving my hands too much?
Jill : I didn't hear a word you said, I was admiring how great you look in my suit.
Adam : Christy, you're doing great. Angie Harmon moved her arms a lot on Law & Order.
Jill : Is she still on that show?
Adam : No, they canceled it, then she went to Rizzoli and Isles.
Jill : That show hasn't been on for years either, should we be worried about her?
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Christy : [in a mock trial, to the judge] Your Honor, the defendant claims he's not a drug dealer, but he hides drugs like a drug dealer, he uses an old phone like a drug dealer, he rents several motel rooms to avoid search warrants, *like* a drug dealer.
Beatrice : Where'd you get that? None of that was in the files.
Christy : It was ALL in the files, your childhood was just too happy for you to notice it.
Beatrice : What's that supposed to mean?
Christy : It means I know how drug dealers work, yo. I was *raised* by a drug dealer, and I have my own dark years, I drank, I did drugs, I was a stripper... that doesn't have anything to do with this but it's out there. Didn't anyone ever wonder why I'm the oldest person in this class?
Beatrice : I did.
Glen : Me too.
Professor Gannon : I wondered, but I'm not allowed to ask.
Christy : It's because it's a *long* road to get here from the person I used to be. I know how drug dealers operate, and this man is *guilty*! Your Honor, the prosecution rests.
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Adam : Christy, you're gonna do great, that drug dealer is going down.
Bonnie : Your trial's a drug case? What're the facts?
Christy : Well, drugs were found in a locked car in his driveway, but it's not registered in his name.
Bonnie : That's the oldest trick in the book! Remember when we lived in Oklahoma and I had that beat up old Monte Carlo registered in a dead person's name?
Christy : So nothing could ever be tied back to you!
Adam : I'm a little scared now.
Jill : What's scary is they used to live in Oklahoma, I mean just move to Texas, it's *right* there.
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Christy : [prosecuting a mock trial] Police found this cell phone in your possession. It's a 20 year old Nokia 6285. I'm curious why a cool guy like you would have such an old phone.
Glen : Uh... I'm a retro kind of guy, yo?
Christy : Or is it because a phone this old has no GPS, and therefore it would be impossible to track your movements?